You tell me to quiet down cause my opinions make me less beautiful. But I was not made with a fire in my belly so I could be put out. I was not made with a lightness in my tongue so I could be easy to swallow. I was made heavy – half blade and half silk. Difficult to forget but not easy for the mind to follow.
– Rupi Kaur
Life gives us a lot of experiences. They run the whole emotional scale. We fall from ecstatic joy to pain that leaves us whimpering in the corner, wishing that death would come and take us away from it. Life gives us the experience of Heaven, Hell and every realm between. Like clay we are formed and molded by our life experiences. Like clay we go through the fire. But we have a choice about what that fire does to us. We can choose to become rigid, brittle and defined by those fires, so that everyone we meet hears about our horrific life. Or, we can choose to become refined by the fire, tempered by it and made stronger.
Some women fear the fire, some women simply become it . . .
– r.h. sin
Why would we fear the fire? Because when we are refined by the fire, it exposes us. We see the ugly parts of us, and we have to acknowledge that they are part of us. We can’t deny it, we can’t make it be less than it is, we can’t say it doesn’t exist, and that somehow that ugly bit of us is actually someone else’s fault. We can’t say I lost my temper and it was that persons fault or that they deserved us to go nuclear on them. The fire shines the light on us, and if we stand up in that light and acknowledge who we are, then we have the opportunity to transform it. We can release the negativity and shift it and change it into something better.
She wasn’t looking for a knight, she was looking for a sword.
We all have this mix of fairy tale dreams where we want someone to take care of us, and yet at the same time we fiercely do not want someone to fix us. We are not looking to be fixed. We are not broken and damaged and needing to be rescued. That is judging our experience when you don’t know our whole story. That is making assumptions of what our dreams are made up of. That is not understanding what our destiny is preparing us for. We don’t need a hero, we are one. What we need is a sword to cut out of us all of the parts that do not serve us, and do not belong as part of us.
Life is tough, my darling, but so are you.
– Stephanie Bennett Henry
Promise yourself that you can and will do better. Hold yourself to not looking back. Learn from the past but don’t live there. Leave the baggage at the airport and travel lightly through life. Anything that shattered you wasn’t meant for you. We have this habit sometimes of holding on to something that doesn’t serve us. We stay in the job, where we are experiencing bullying, where we are put down because we believe in some way it is true. We stay in a relationship that burns our soul, sacrificing ourselves because they say they love us even when their actions tell us it is a lie. Don’t continue to dance on the broken glass, thinking that we can somehow fix it. It will just slice our souls and shred our spirits.
You can’t let other people tell you who you are. You have to decide that for yourself.
At some point we have to change the situation. Instead of being battered by the storm, we have to become the storm. In order to thrive we have to become fearless in the pursuit of what sets our soul on fire. We have to put on our life jacket and abandon the sinking ship, with the knowledge that we will be okay. It might not be today or tomorrow, but the storm will always play itself out. The sun will shine again. You are valuable, you are a Goddess and you must firmly believe that with all of your heart and soul.
Her soul is fierce
her heart is brave
her mind is strong.
– r.h. Sin
She was powerful, not because she wasn’t scared but because she went on so strongly, despite the fear.
This kind of power comes from the place of not needing anyone to validate who we are. To get to that space, we have went through the refining fires. We have exposed our vulnerable places, our ugly thoughts and actions. We have brought the light to all of the dark corners of our heart. When you have faced who you really are without the masks, without the excuses and justifications, fear gets burnt out of us. Fear is a choice, and we can choose not to live at its address any longer.
We need women who are so strong they can be gentle. so educated they can be humble, so fierce they can be compassionate, so passionate they can be rational and so disciplined they can be free
– Kavita Ramdas
When we accept who we are, we lose false pride. When we own “this is who I am” fear loses its grip on us. We are ready. We are willing. It is time to go out and fight for our dreams. We no longer feel that we are obligated to prove our worth to anyone, and if they are demanding that we do so, we just walk away.
Once upon a time you were a little girl with big dreams that you promised you’d make real one day. Don’t disappoint yourself.