Sending Love Wherever It Is Needed
We all have those days. The days when nothing is seeming to go the way you planned. That day when every mistake you made in the past year, shows up on your desk within 5 minutes of your sitting down. Those days when you feel that the very idea of being able to control anything in your life, is life’s great joke on you.
“Life has many ways of testing a person’s will, either by having nothing happen at all, or by having everything happen at once” – Paulo Coelho
If you could see what was being hidden in each of our lives, I think that you would be more loving to one another. There is a video that was done, where little thought bubbles come up as the camera goes down the halls and elevators in a hospital. Someone is saying goodbye to their dying father. One man was just told the tumor was benign, while another was told he has cancer. An elderly woman with oxygen has been waiting for a heart transplant for 69 days. An exhausted nurse is at the end of a 12 hour shift. “
Those are the days when you need someone to hug you and say, “You are Good Enough. You are Capable of Handling this. You are Important. You are more than Worthy. You are LOVED. You are NOT ALONE.” These are the days that you need all of the light and love that the world can send you. What you have to remember, is that at this very moment, someone in the world is either sending you that love, or is in need of you to send that love.
“Could a greater miracle take place, than for us to look through each other’s eyes for an instant?” – Henry David Thoreau
It is when you are living your life from the place of passion and purpose, that you shine the brightest. Knowing that your deepest dreams can be reached. It is when you take that deep breath, and just let the emotions flow out of you, that you can reset yourself. It is hard to be loving and empathetic when you are in survival mode. You need to give yourself the oxygen mask, reset your emotions and then help others. Find that spark inside of you, and let it shine first for you. Then shine it for others to help them find theirs.
Recently driving into work, I was playing a CD with healing sounds. A friend of mine knew that I have been having some health issues, and thought it might help. So I purchased it and have been playing it all week.
I realized that every area in almost everyone’s life right now is undergoing some issues. Work layoffs; health issues; injustices in life, and just watching the news can make you a little stressed out about how everything is in a negative place right now.
Writing these posts and finding the “good news” articles and videos is what keeps my feet walking down my path of transformation. It is keeping me sane. It is why I write, and why I want to share what I find with all of the other LemonadeMakers out there.
“Remember . . . the entrance to the sanctuary is within you” – Rumi
Then you add in everything negative happening with the war in Ukraine, fighting in politics between the parties, terrorists’ attacks; the workplace and school shootings, countries at war within their own borders, or threatening to make war on other countries – it can all feel overwhelming.
None of these problems have easy solutions. I think that we are all being called by the Divine to wake up. To be the love and light that the world needs to heal. We all need to heal in some way.
“Spread love everywhere you go. Let no one ever come to you with leaving happier” – Mother Teresa
When you lift someone else up, it automatically lifts you up. As the saying goes, “you rise by lifting others”. It is not dependent on the other person appreciating your showing them love. It is not dependent on it being reciprocated back to you. It could even be ignored. It will still lift both of you up.
This is because your showing love to others means that you are actively involved in the growth and support of another person. Right now, you may not be in a place of being able to offer a refugee a place to stay. You may not be in a place to donate money to help support someone in need. But you are always in a place of showing love to someone. Even if it is just a smile and a small prayer that love light their way forward. You are always able to shine out the love and light to others.
Just Because My Path Is Different, Doesn’t Mean I’m Lost
It’s better to walk alone, than with a crowd going in the wrong direction.
– Diane Grant
When we try to walk down another persons road, it leads to disillusionment and disappointment. That is because it isn’t “our” road. In the book “The Pilgrimage”, Paulo Coelho said that:
It is our decision to walk, that creates the road ahead of us.
– Paulo Coelho
Trying to explain to someone what our personal truth is for the path we are walking, is like trying to explain rocket science to a baby. It isn’t that the baby will never understand rocket science. It is that the baby isn’t yet developed enough to understand. We can’t explain our path to someone who isn’t yet at that same stage of their own truth. It will only create misunderstandings, miscommunications, and lots of frustration. Even we sometimes can’t put into words the necessity for why we have to do something. We just know that we have to do it. It has to do with our being conscious and open minded enough to realize when we are being directed. It has to do with our acceptance of that direction, even when we don’t know why.
It takes courage to keep walking when the path is obscured by confusion. TRUST. BELIEVE. And just keep walking. The way will be revealed.
– Sue Krebs
It is both being courageous and having curiosity, that keeps us forging ahead on the path. It is the journey itself, that grows us as a person. It is our attitude about what happens. It molds us either for our greater good, or for living out life disappointed as a victim of circumstances and bad luck. It is the difference between knowing what you need to do, and doing what needs to be done. It is easy to get the knowledge, but the wisdom only comes from putting that knowledge into action. It can’t just be “book learning”, it also has to be married to “learning in action”.
Getting lost along your path is part of finding the path you are meant to be on.
– Robin S. Sharma
It has been said that it’s never about obtaining the “goal”. It is rather about who you need to become, to achieve the goal. There are many different roads to walk. They go through many different landscapes. It could be a forest path, with giant trees that shadow the land. It could be through sand dunes and along beaches. It could be a path of a river which sometimes meanders slowly, and other times rushes through rapids crushing you against the rocks, and then dumps you down a waterfall. It could be the hot desert or the frozen tundra. Each path will require different skillsets in order for you to become the master of your journey. Different clothing, different shoes, different temperatures to be endured. Different equipment from ropes, boats, sleds etc. . . . It is always your choice of where you step, and which path(s) your choose. If you don’t like the first road you chose, move over to a new one.
You must learn a new way to think before you can master a new way to be.
– Marianne Williamson
It is always our decision to skip and sing our way along the yellow brick road, or to whine, complain, dragging our feet as we ask “are we there yet”? Are you standing in your own truth? Are you walking your own path? Is your heart guiding you? Look for the opportunities to better understand the journey. Look for the helpers to guide us on our path. The destination or outcome of our journey isn’t what is important. It is who we are becoming, what we are actually doing that makes us successful.
I have always loved the saying, “It’s not the destination,… it’s the journey”. This is because the path we choose is our journey. It is where we live our life. It is all of life’s experiences. The good, bad, and the ugly. The messy parts, as well as the glorious adventures. We can see treasures every single day, if we just take the time to notice them. Life goes on, it moves on. It does it regardless of whether we are saying yes to our destiny or running the other way. Since the path to happiness lies in the direction of our destiny, why not say yes? Choose happiness.
Does the walker choose the path, or the path the walker?
– Garth Nix
Along the way, we live life out loud. We can choose to taste and savor the experiences that that journey brings to us. The more that we can reach out in happiness, joy, and just plain exuberance, the richer our life is. The destination is simply a road sign. A sign that we made it to “X”. Then we begin planning a new destination or goal. It’s all about the road we choose, the path we forge. Who we are becoming. What we reveal and release that is not truly who we are at heart.
By choosing the path, we choose the destination.
– Thomas Monson
Have you ever heard the saying, “you can’t go home again”? The reason why is that while you were away, you changed. You look at things differently. You think that everything changed. But in reality it was you who changed. The house you lived in as a small child, suddenly looks much smaller – the house didn’t change size – but your way of looking at the world changed. We are all far from who we once were, and we are still farther from whom we are growing into. What is really scary is when you go home again, and see those who haven’t changed. They haven’t even put on foot onto their path. They are still stuck back five, ten, or twenty years ago with the same victimhood mentality. They are caution signs to keep walking on your path.
One’s destination is never a place but rather a new way of looking at things.
– Henry Miller
So cast off the bowlines. Sail out of the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds and see where they take you. Remember that you are always only one decision away from a totally different life. Embrace the journey and it will love you back. Trust your journey, even when you don’t understand where destiny is taking you. It could just be the biggest, most juiciest trip of your life.
Let yourself be silently drawn by the strange pull of what you really love. It will not lead you astray.
– Rumi
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Walk Away – Not From Pride Or Arrogance, But Because That Door No Longer Leads Somewhere You Can Live
Knowing when to walk away is wisdom. Being able to is courage. Walking away, with your head held high is dignity.
We all stand at the threshold of a great adventure every day. It can be a scary place, because we all have our individual self doubts. We have to unlearn the programming that says it is selfish to put ourselves first. It is not selfish to love ourselves, to take care of ourselves, and make our own happiness a priority. As they say on every airplane takeoff, in case of emergency, put your own oxygen mask on first, then you can help others.
Every soul is beautiful and precious; is worthy of dignity and respect, and deserving of peace, joy, and love.
– Bryant McGill
You cannot change what is going on around you, until you start changing what is going on inside of you. We need to put on that oxygen mask, so we can take stock of what inside of us is not working. We need to let go of what is not ours to fix, put up with, or allow to continue happening.
We are all born with a purpose and a passion. It is up to you to seek out that purpose and find your passion.
– Billy Cox
We are fragile human beings who can be destroyed by another’s words or actions. If we are not being treated with love and respect, we need to see what value we have assigned to ourselves. The people that we surround ourselves with are a reflection of how we view ourselves. We need to get off the “reduced last chance sale rack”, and get inside the fancy glass case where the precious jewels are displayed.
You are determining the future you every day. Will the decisions you make today lead you closer to the person you want to be tomorrow?
– Brenna Smith
How many times for example has someone said, “Where to you want to go to dinner?” and your answer was that you didn’t know or didn’t care. You do know what you feel like eating, but somehow, you always say, “it doesn’t matter, what you do want?” The scriptures say something like, he who is faithful in little things, is faithful in bigger things. What it is talking about is the principle of patterns. What you do in the big things has been formed by the habits of what you do in the little things. The habit of always putting others before you, started in the smaller things, like what do you want for dinner.
Be authentic! Don’t lower your dreams to fit it with others. If people can’t celebrate your dreams, they are probably not your friends.
– Phineas Kinuthia
We may be afraid that no one will listen to us, so why speak. We may be terrified that they will laugh at our dreams and say they are unattainable. We fear being judged as unworthy, not enough. We don’t want to be all alone and so we abdicate our life away, so that we will be accepted and fit in. This is the story that we tell ourselves so that we don’t have to change.
Instead we can start making choices that feed us, energize us. We can choose to be unstoppable. To be bigger than any worries that are buzzing around us. Those buzzing worries are just scenario’s that no longer serve to build us up. Release what is no longer serving you. Open the window shooing the fly to go buzz its way outside.
Sometimes the hardest thing to do, is also the right thing to do.
The universe is always speaking to us . . . sending us little messages, causing coincidences and serendipities, reminding us to stop, to look around, to believe in something else, something more.
– Nancy Thayer
You are more than you have shown yourself to be so far. You are more than you have been willing to see. You are stronger than you know. Trust your intuition and live a courageous life.
Respect your efforts, respect yourself. Self respect leads to self discipline. When you have both firmly under your belt, that’s real power.
– Clint Eastwood
Today is the day to get up and walk down your sacred path. Choose to dwell in divine possibility. Awaken to the divine guidance that has been sending you messages. Believe in the divine plan, that you are more capable than you ever dreamed. Remember that you will never had to sacrifice your dignity for your destiny. If it feels like that is the choice, then your intuition is telling you to pass that choice by.
Be not the slave of your own past – plunge into the sublime seas, dive deep, and swim far, so you shall come back with self-respect, with new power, with an advanced experience, that shall explain and overlook the old.
– Ralph Waldo Emerson
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The Butterfly Effect Is, Everything Happens For A Reason, Change One Thing, Change Everything.
Learn how to see. Realize that everything connects to everything else.
– Leonardo da Vinci
Change is a funny thing in our lives. It happens everyday. A seed breaks its shell and begins growing a plant. The Apple Tree blossoms, forms the bud of an apple that grows and ripens. The seeds are sown, they grow and produce according to their kind, and they are harvested, eaten and the process begins again.
In 1963 Edward Lorenz presented “The Chaos Theory” to the New York Academy of Science and was laughed out of the room. Thirty years later, this theory was accorded the status of a “law” when physics professors proved it to be true. The original theory stated that, a butterfly flapping his wings set molecules of air in motion, which moved other air molecules and so forth until a hurricane was set in motion on the other side of the planet. This change effect, states that in our own lives, even a small change can bring about a revolutionary impact in our lives.
We can look at this through the analogy of the ripple in a lake. A raindrop hits the still water and starts a ripple. Then another raindrop, and another, and so on. Each one creates its own ripple. These ripples expand out, and end up striking each other as the raindrops fall. Each of these tiny ripples impact each other to create chaos in the still water. In the same way, our thoughts, words, and the little details and actions that we complete or leave undone each minute, hour and day impacts not only our life, but the lives of others, both near and far.
Every single thing you do matters. You have been created as one of a kind. You have within you the power to change the world.
– Andy Andrews
Your destiny is bound to the destiny of others. They say, “the devil is in the details”. The reason this is true is because it is the details that really change you, and the world around you. You might think that big events change the world, but if you study history and trace backwards, it comes down to something that was thought to be insignificant, that really sets it all in motion.
Think back to something that happened in your life that you can see totally impacted your life. Trace backwards to where the event really started. Not the moment that all of the dominoes crashed down, but to the event that started the dominoes to tilt. A close friend had some major changes happen in her life in the past 10 months. She didn’t see the connections until just this past week. When she saw them, she was astounded at what started the whole pattern to breakdown.
My friend and her husband decided the end of last year to move into a new condo unit. It was a much nicer unit with more space and a great view. The new condo was renting for $600 more a month than they had been paying. It also had additional utilities payments that had been included in their rent for the previous condo. So like most of us, she looked at her monthly budget to determine how they would be able afford the higher rent.
Her old place was next to a Starbucks, and they had been in the habit of going there for breakfast every single day. So the amount of money they were spending a month, was just about equal to their higher rent payment. So she thought they would just stop going to Starbucks, and the higher rent would be easily absorbed into their lifestyle.
They moved into their new home and adjusted their spending habits as planned. This was the detail that escaped my friend when she made this decision, that she saw when she looked backwards. My friend was contracting her wealth energy by making this decision. Starbucks was part of her wealth profile. She felt wealthy by going there everyday, and spending that much money on coffee. It gave her the expansive energy of abundance. She could afford to do this, therefore she was wealthy.
A few months later, she noticed that her business was slowly contracting and they were month over month earning less money. This in turn caused her to further retract her spending habits. Then my friends husband told her he was leaving her. He had reconnected with his first wife and decided to divorce my friend, and begin a new life with his ex-wife.
My friend was devastated, as she hadn’t seen it coming. It was like she was getting hit after hit. At one of their meetings to discuss their divorce, she finally got enough courage to talk to him about what had happened. She asked him, when his feelings for her changed? He told her that it was after they moved. He felt like they were losing their lifestyle, and that it started with Starbucks and then continued on to other things. He didn’t want to live that way.
That was when the “lightbulb” went off in her head. Starbucks had been the energy of her feeling wealthy. When she made that decision, that started the rain drops hitting her lake. The more raindrops that fell, the more the ripples contracted her wealth energy, which caused her business to lose more revenue. Those ripples hitting upon each other changed every bit of positive flowing energy in her life. It was contraction after contraction in every aspect of her life.
Perhaps the butterfly is proof that you can go through a great deal of darkness yet become something beautiful. While she has been through hell the past few months, as soon as she saw the connections forming she immediately started shifting her energy back into the space of abundance. Her business has fully recovered, and is currently more successful than it was this time last year. She learned a powerful lesson that has been known for centuries.
Everything is alive; everything is connected.
– Cicero
She feels that if instead, she had thought expansive thoughts, such as what can I do to increase my revenues to afford a higher rent, that her business would have grown and expanded. They would not have had to reduce their lifestyle, and things would have continue along the same path with her husband. Now while we can’t say for sure that her marriage would have not ended, but it certainly seems possible that she is correct.
Think back into your own life when you had a situation like my friend. A time when life started going downhill fast. A time when one domino after another seemed to be falling. A time when you hit rock bottom. Now trace it back to right before it all started falling apart. There in that space, you made a decision, that was probably a decision of contraction. There was something there that was a tiny detail, that you didn’t realize was connecting your life and holding it all together.
When one tugs at a single thing in nature, one finds it attached to everything else.
– John Muir
This is so important to remember. Contraction of energy will cause our connections to spin out of control. It is expansion of energy that grows into abundance. It is expansion of energy that creates love and compassion to one another. This is what we need more of, both in our personal lives and the world. It is the answer to all questions, expansion of love.
Humankind has not woven the web of life. We are but one thread within it. Whatever we do to the web, we do to ourselves. All things are bound together,… all things connect.
– Chief Seattle
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When Life Challenges You, Hold Your Head Up High And Ride That Wave To The Shore
Our feelings and emotions can at times be overwhelming. I remember when my mom passed away, that in the evenings I would get deluged with emotions of missing her, being mad at her for dying, hurting so much that I just crawled into a ball and cried until I couldn’t breathe. There are times in your life, when your whole body is crying in such deep pain, that it takes everything you have just to take another breath. It feels as though your soul is on fire. It is hard to remember that feelings are just visitors, and we can let them visit, and then let them go back out the door they came in.
An entire sea of water can’t sink a ship, unless it gets inside the ship. Similarly, the negativity of the world can’t put you down, unless you allow it to get inside of you.
– Goi Nasu
Like a person surfing the waves, we can learn to ride these overwhelming emotions. We may crash and fall off our board, but we can choose to get right back on and ride the next wave. To me riding the wave is allowing the emotion to flow right through us, just as the wave reaches the shore and dissipates into nothing.
Life is like riding a wave. To keep your balance, you must keep moving.
– Eric Carlson
Sometimes your heart needs more time to accept what your mind already knows. I think the reason that grief or anger can get us stuck in these emotions, is because we don’t allow the emotions to flow through. They can get caught in a rip tide inside of us. We fight releasing them until we are exhausted. Sometime we struggle and we battle ourselves, denying how we are really feeling. Other time we wallow in these emotions, holding them to our hearts and refusing to let them flow. Either way they will keep pushing us to the shore and then dragging us back out to sea, until we are so exhausted, that the rough surf literally beats us into the sand.
Allowing the emotions to pass through helps us to heal from the hurt. We recover much faster, and we can begin choosing good memories to dwell on. We can progress into appreciation for the time that we had with what we have lost. The truth is that we haven’t really lost anything. People and things come into our lives, serve their purpose or reason for being there, and then move on to the next thing. The important thing is that we had them in our lives for the time they were with us.
When we have a bad memory come up, we can just ride the wave to the shore, and then consciously allow it to fade into foam and dissipate. It doesn’t have to drag us back out again. We can release the hold we have on it, and let the feeling fade away. As the last bubble of the foam pops, then it is time to let it go. Then we can consciously decide that we want to raise our vibrations up into higher levels. We can raise the vibration out from the sadness, grief, or anger. We can start attracting good feelings into our space. We always have a choice, even when we think that we don’t.
When stress and bad days hit, we are designed to reach out for the help we need. But our natural tendency is to withdraw instead. We shut down, hole up, limit ourselves to our own little worlds.
– Holley Gerth.
It is important when the bad days hit, to reach out to someone we love and let them help us.
Allow yourself to really feel, your feelings. It’s okay to bare your soul, breakdown or cry because through that breakdown comes your breakthrough.
– Rashida Rowe.
Letting those who love us help us, is practicing self care. It is reflecting back to those who love us, how much we love and trust them to be with us in our hour of need. And sometimes when those that we love say they are okay, we need to hold them tight and look them in the eyes and tell them that we know that they are not okay. And that in itself is okay, because we are going to keep holding them tight until they can breathe on their own again.
Taking a few deep belly breaths, placing our hands on our heart, and consciously reaching for something that will help us raise our awareness into something positive. I always think of the laughing baby when the dad tears the paper video or cute kittens and puppies, or a favorite song like Pharrell Williams “Happy” song. Music has the wonderful ability to speak to us, to express what is in our hearts, that we can’t express in words. As the “Happy” songs says, “happiness is the truth”.
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To Catch Your Dreams, You Have To Be Brave Enough To Chase Them
Have you ever heard of the question – If you could have dinner with anyone dead or alive, who would you want to have to a dinner party? Eleanor Roosevelt is on my list. She seems to have been a remarkable woman. Her advice?
“Do one thing everyday that scares you” – Eleanor Roosevelt
I don’t live up to this quote, but I do try to do things that scare me. First I procrastinate on them a little, though. Most of the things that scare me, are things that I have never tried to do before. So every year part of my goals, are to do things that I don’t currently know how to do.
Do you remember when you were a kid and you got your first bike? I remember being so excited to be able to ride a bike like all of the bigger kids did. It was a symbol of growing older. A lot like getting your drivers license or turning 21, a true milestone. First though you had to have training wheels. It took a time or two to figure out that they were keeping you from falling, because you had to learn to trust them. Then came the day that you had probably been whining about, the day they took the training wheels off. You were ready to balance the bike and ride it all alone. After a fall or two, you figured out how to balance the bike and from then on you were no longer a baby.
What I remember most, is that even though I was scared of falling and getting hurt, I wanted those training wheels off. Being accepted into the big kids group was more important than letting the fear stop me. Always remember that when you are scared, you are thinking about doing something that requires you to be brave. Riding a bicycle without training wheels for a 5 year old is being very brave.
“If it’s both terrifying and amazing then you should definitely pursue it” – Erada
What is something that you have done this past year that required you to be very brave? What were the training wheels that you removed, the thing that you were depending on, that you needed to let go, so that you could grow?
When I took my drivers training class, it was part of high school. The class started right after school, and the first time behind the wheel you had to drive off a side street bordering the high school. All of your friends would gather around the stop sign, waiting for you to drive the car out of the lot and up to the stop sign on the side road. Of course, there were several sudden jerking stops as you drove toward the stop sign and all of your friends would laugh. It was like a hazing in a way, because it eventually happened to everyone you knew. At some point we would all be the object of ridicule. But at the same time, it was like – cool, I’m driving a car!
These are the two examples that I keep in my head when I am trying to break through and do something that scares me. Both of those things scared me, but at the same time, it was cool, look at what I am doing! It reminds me of the hit song from “Panic At The Disco”, “Hey look ma, I made it”. It also helps to have mentors like Eleanor Roosevelt. People that you admire, who you can look to for guidance. Albert Einstein is another of my dinner party guests. He said:
“A person who never made a mistake never tried anything new” – Albert Einstein
I think that sometimes you are scared to want something so badly that it hurts. You are scared of not only failing, but of succeeding and then being disappointed. Of succeeding only to lose it later. So you tell yourself that you are afraid of failure, but in reality, you are afraid of success not being enough. Of success not lasting.
“Move out of your comfort zone. You can only grow if you are willing to feel awkward and uncomfortable when you try something new” – Brian Tracy
I have really thought about this fear of failure/success. I love the breakdown of the process in the above picture – that moving out of your comfort zone is actually a process of moving from fear, to learning and then to growth. (note: the photo is from Adobe and I can’t fix the typo)
Once I move past fear the feeling I have shifts into anticipation. Like fear, it also begins and ends in the stomach. Like riding the roller coaster as it climbs up and up to the sky, and then hurtles you down to the earth, whipping you back and forth through the turns. The wind blowing against you, your stomach lurching up your chest as you hold on tight. Then all of sudden the ride is over and you are running back to the end of the line to do it again. This kind of fear is telling you that being scared can be a thrill, because you are learning and extending your comfort zone at the same time. That what you are about to experience by entering the growth zone is worth breaking through the hesitation and going full out.
“Life is inherently risky. There is only one big risk you should avoid at all costs, and that is the risk of doing nothing” – Denis Waitley
They say that at the end of a persons life, what they talk about is the things that they didn’t take the risk and try to do. Being in love, is one of those risks. Being afraid of being vulnerable, of being rejected, they hold back the words. At the end of their life they regret not telling people how they really felt, not saying “I love you” enough to those that mattered to them. When they had the opportunity, they shrunk back telling themselves, “they know how I feel”. While that may be true, what any person wants and needs is to hear those words.
“If it doesn’t challenge you, it doesn’t change you” – Unknown
So whether it is learning to ride a bike, drive a car, ride a roller coaster or say “I love you” – don’t let fear hold you back. Be brave. Say the words, do the deeds. Feel the fear and do it because it is scary. Do the things that both excite you and scare you at the same time. Live your life as fully expressed, as bravely, and as committed as you can. Just maybe if you can do that, you’ll get more than you ever could have imagined.
“All our dreams can come true if we have the courage to pursue them” – Walt Disney
What Would Your Life Look Like, If I Gave You The Key To Unlock Your Full Potential?
Have you ever said, “I would be happier if .., fill in the blank ____________ (my spouse was …,, my job was…, my weight was ? lbs. less? etc…)” I am going to use my weight as the example, but you can substitute anything in your life, that is currently not bringing you into a state of joy. As you read through this, you can just adapt the process around your job, your spouse, your family, your finances, etc…
Never put the key to your happiness in someone else’s pocket – Unknown
This includes the pocket of your self saboteur. Have you ever counted calories? Have you counted steps? Weighed yourself every day to see if you released a single pound? I know I have. I have a Fitbit and I watch the numbers go up until I reach that 10,000 step mark. I worry over what I am eating and snacking on. What I recently discovered about this, is I am in fact disempowering myself.
Old ways won’t open new doors. – unknown
A new way of saying Einstein’s definition of insanity. I am “trying” over and over again to have better control, so that I can become healthier. Old ways that didn’t work the first time. It is sort of like banging my head against the door, hoping this time it will open for me. I keep “trying” to get myself out of the obesity designation. What I am in fact doing, is disempowering myself from being successful. I am empowering my view of my weight, to have complete control of my eating and exercise habits, setting myself up for self sabotage. I have put the keys to my happiness in the pocket of my self saboteur.
Find a heart that will love you at your worst and arms that will hold you at your weakest. – Unknown
That heart and those arms need to be yours, not someone else’s. When something isn’t working, then study, research, read and listen. It never has failed me that someone will say something that triggers my mind to go down a rabbit hole and come up with something that my heart and soul have been trying to communicate with me.
Dear Destiny, I am ready to listen now. – unknown
When I walk every day, I listen to podcasts. I have Tony Robbins, TED Talks, a NPR show called Scratch, EWomen’s Network, Success Magazine, and several others that I listen to. I listen to whatever is next on the list. This past week, I pieced something together from several different podcasts that became an “aha” moment. I needed to listen to my inner genius. Those who listen to their inner genius often end up changing their world. So I asked myself, “What is it still possible for me to do?” Notice that I said do, not try.
I have been trying to discover through hits and misses what is contributing to the weight I have, and what I might do to be more successful in releasing the weight. It isn’t as simple as diet and exercise. What I received this week was a couple of keys.
Key #1 – Don’t try. Trying doesn’t last long. Trying is one of those words that sounds positive, but doesn’t have a high energy vibration to it. Falling back to the famous Yoda quote – “Don’t try, Do or don’t do.” Instead the key that fits into the transformation door, is to commit myself to “mastery” of releasing weight and becoming healthy. Mastery is hard work. You have to learn something completely. To take it apart and put it back together again. To understand the purpose and reason for every single part, and the actions it plays. It takes time. But when you become a master at something, it doesn’t just change you, it transforms you.
Mastery reflects understanding diet and nutrition, not generally, but as it applies to my individual DNA and my physical body. It reflects understanding how the feelings I am feeling each day (my moods, and memories) enter into the equation. It is about paying attention to my instincts or gut reactions to the pain and pleasure that is happening to me moment by moment. And lastly it included my thinking or my intellect.
There are powers inside of you which, if you could discover and use, would make of you everything you ever dreamed or imagined you could become. – Orison Swett Marsden
Key #2 – Realize that my mind plays this game of chaos. I can tell that my weight is affecting my general health. I am exhausted. I have digestive issues among other things happening.
But my mind likes the chaos it understands, better than the chaos it doesn’t know. It started from fear. It said it was trying to protect me from unwanted attention. It told me that I didn’t want to be like my mom, and hurt people that I loved.
So add in a few pounds, plus a few more. Still getting attention, don’t worry, just add a few more pounds. My own subconscious good intentions will kill me. I needed to forgive myself, and let go of the need for protection.
Forgiveness is not something we do for other people. It’s something we do for ourselves to move on. – unknown
Key #3 – I am changing the interior landscape a little each day. I really never practiced self care. It was always care for everyone else first, and I got whatever was left over.
So it is like going from the hard dry desert to a beautiful flower garden with a stream flowing through the middle. I had to dig up the soil. I had to put in some fertilizer to bring it up to optimal healthy soil that would support the growth of the flower garden.
I then planted seeds. I watered them. I weeded out what doesn’t belong or bring me joy. I brought in some nice chairs to sit in. A small table to put a nice glass of lavender lemonade on. I transformed the desert of “not taking care of myself”, into a place that empowers me to do self care.
Your success and happiness lies in you. Resolve to keep happy, and your joy and you shall form an invincible host against difficulties. – Helen Keller
Key #4 – Gratitude. Every day I am finding things about my body, my health, the way I am taking better care of me – ways I can be grateful that I have this opportunity to bring back vibrant health to me. Gratitude pays homage and honors the steps I am taking.
It says that while I am not where I want to be, I am making progress.
It says that I don’t have to beat myself up on the days I fall short of 10,000 steps, or have the strawberry shortcake for dessert. It says that I will continue to be committed to bringing my body into a completely healthy state. The “friend” needs to be “you”. Self Love.
I’m a success today because I had a friend who believed in me, and I didn’t have the heart to let him down. – Abraham Lincoln
If you find yourself spending a lot of time and money, and not making any progress, you are in fact, stuck in neutral. It feels like you are in drive, because you are counting calories, you are weighing in, you are restricting your food intake, but you are in fact stuck in neutral. This is evident when day after day, no weight is released. Your subconscious mind has you stuck in the chaos you know. You are blindfolded as to what is really happening.
Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark in the hopeless swamps of the not-quite, the not-yet, and the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish in lonely frustration for the life you deserved and have never been able to reach. The world you desire can be won. It exists . . . it is real . . . it is possible . . . it’s yours. – Any Rand
When you are not reaching your goals, you need to stop. Take a deep breath and look at what you are doing. First look to gratitude to where you are on the map. Then look to the patterns of the familiar chaos – what is eating up your time, energy, money, contributing to your frustrations? What story are you buying into that creates the “I am too tired” to walk tonight?” What food cravings around caffeine, sugar, processed foods, fast foods are you having because you are bored or stressed out? These stories are your self sabotaging patterns. If you can start to recognize them, then you have the potential to transform them.
The will to win, the desire to succeed, the urge to reach your full potential…, these are the keys that will unlock the door to personal excellence. – Confucius
When you have mapped out where you are, then you are ready to put the car back into drive and put your foot on the gas. You do this by getting deeper into personal mastery. The neutral gear is calling your attention to some part of the chaos, that is not working for you any longer. Something that needs to be down shifted, released and/or transformed. Once you have gotten this new piece of knowledge into your head, drawn it down into your heart to become wisdom, then you can release your passion to fuel your motivation. You can realize your expanded potential and unlock a new door in your life of transformation.
You have always possessed the keys of transformation. The divine puts the doors of opportunity in front of you, over and over again. It is up to you to put the key in the lock, and go through the door. When you do that you discover untold potential and mastery within yourself. You have more natural potential than you could use in 100 lifetimes. Don’t let this life go by, not even using a small fraction of it.
Questions provide the key to unlocking your unlimited potential. – Tony Robbin
Don’t Ever Let Anyone Dull Your Sparkle
She who leaves a trail of glitter is never forgotten. Do you believe this about yourself and your life? Or do you think it only about someone else. Someone who is more beautiful, more intelligent, richer than you? Too many of us don’t even feel worthy to have the glitter, yet alone leave a trail of it for others to follow.
I just wish I hadn’t spent so much time worrying about not being someone else’s definition of enough. – Sophia Bush
So many of us come out of childhood thinking that we are not enough. Not enough to have our parents love us the way they should have. Not smart enough. Not talented enough (insert – don’t sing, don’t dance, don’t draw). Not pretty enough. The list is endless about how we are not enough, to be loved, accepted, to have our dreams become a reality.
Always know you are more than enough. You are precious, unique, and worth being adored, cherished and treasured! – Kandee Johnson
Try to say nothing negative about yourself for one hour, for one day, for one week, for one month. The longer you can maintain this test, the more amazing your life will become. It has been said that the biggest disease affecting humanity is “I am not enough”.
It is the driver of every act of self sabotage. When your mind thinks “I am not enough”, you will subconsciously self sabotage yourself out of anything that doesn’t affirm that lie.
Marissa Peer is a bestseller author, celebrity hypnotist and speaker. A lot of her focus is on helping people overcome this limiting belief to help them stop sabotaging their lives.
One of the things that she recommends is putting on your phone a timed text message stating “I am enough” and having it text you each morning and evening.
Write on the mirrors in your home, especially in your bathroom and carry around a piece of paper to remind you
“YOU ARE ENOUGH
– you are so enough
it is UNBELIEVABLE how enough you are.”
So think about your language and how often do you say things like –
- I am so stupid
- I always forget important things
- I am ___________ – whatever derogatory label you say about yourself (fat, lazy, ugly, etc…)
What is that something about yourself? That quality you think is missing? That place where you don’t think you are enough?
- Aim for balance.
- Make up your own rules.
- Create reasons on how instead you love that particular aspect of yourself.
- Follow your own path. The rules of beauty and intelligence are all made up anyway.
- Start your own fashion and don’t let anyone tell you “who” you are.
- Love and appreciate yourself first, and then spread that glitter upon everyone you meet.
When you get praise, how often do you reject praise, and you add in a piece of criticism? “That is a beautiful outfit you have on today”, and you say – “this old thing, it makes me look fat”. Even scarier, do your sons and daughters say these things about themselves? When they are 1, 2 or 3 years old we celebrated that they took their first step, their first word, the first time they went potty in the potty chair. But there comes a time when they start school and they start being compared to others. Now they are experiencing the “not enough” and they start believing it.
The fear of not getting the reward becomes the fear of rejection. The fear of not being good enough. . . is what makes us try to change, what makes us create an image. – Miguel Angel Ruiz
The book, “The Four Agreements” by Miguel Angel Ruiz is a wonderful book that teaches you about the masks that you began wearing when you were children. You will wear these masks all of your life, if you don’t learn how to remove them. You need to be who you truly are, without the fear of rejection and not being enough. Turn it around for yourself, for your children. Learn to accept praise without feeling unworthy. Hear the words you say about yourself, and change them when they are downgrading or demeaning. I always wanted my mother to say I did a good job – I made it a point to say to my children that they did a good job.
Lie to your brain, cheat your fear, and steal back your life of “I am more than enough” feeling that you had as a very young child.
- I am enough;
- You are enough;
- We’ve always been enough.
- Now grab the glitter and start leaving a trail, spreading it with every step you take.
Choices, Chances, Changes
Win as if you were used to it, lose as if you enjoyed it for a change.
– Ralph Waldo Emerson
At some point in our childhood we start looking at trying and failing, as being a loser, because we did not do it perfectly the first time we tried. A baby learns how to roll over; then crawl; then walk. A baby learns how to say words. Think of any 1 – 2 year old and they do not pronounce each word perfectly. I remember my boys saying truck, but the “T” blended with the “R” sounded like an “F” and peoples heads would turn when they said the word, like they were swearing. My boys didn’t decide that because they couldn’t say the word perfectly the first time, that they would never attempt to say the word again. A baby who stands up for the first time and then plops back down on their bum doesn’t decide that crawling is safer, so that is all they are going to do forever.
If you believe the doubts in your mind you won’t achieve the dreams in your heart.
– Marinela Reka
A girlfriend and I were discussing this, and I thought that it must have something to do with peer pressure. When we enter daycare or some other classroom experience and discover that some kids can do things better than we can. At some point the comparison starts shutting us down. We don’t want to risk the possibility of being wrong, so we don’t raise our hands when the teacher asks the class a question. We put a label on not being perfect, as being a total failure. In our minds we see kids with mean faces, laughing at us. Or maybe we see our parents or teachers telling us that we are just stupid or dumb. That we can’t learn anything. That we will never be anything.
Failure is not the opposite of success; it’s a stepping stone to success.
– Elli Stassinopoulos
What if we were to consciously try to change that meaning in our own head. What if failure is part of success and something to be enjoyed? Just as much as we celebrate crossing the finish line in a race as the winner, we were to celebrate crossing the finish line even 1 second faster than we had before, even if it was 100th place in the race?
Winston Churchill had that kind of thinking. I think that if he had been of a different mentality, WWII for England might have turned out differently. One of my favorite quotes of his –
Success is going from failure to failure without a loss of enthusiasm.
– Winston Churchill
The reality of the situation is that each time we try something new, it is going to be full of things that we can do differently to be more successful the next time. They say that it takes 10,000 hours to become a master of something. So each time we do it, we are a little more successful. We can look at what happened and determine what we can shift, take out, put it, tweak the next time to make it even better.
What makes someone talented successful? Michael Jordon summed it up with,
I’ve never been afraid to fail.
– Michael Jordon
We have to be willing to take the leap of faith off the cliff. We may not land perfectly, but when we replay it in our mind, we can determine what we did, and what we can change. Then we can go back up to the top and try it again.
If you’re not prepared to be wrong, you’ll never come up with anything original.
– Ken Robinson
Everything can be improved. 10,000 tries allows for an awful lot of improvements, step by step. Step by step, we place each thing that didn’t work as the stones that we step on as we try it one more time. Failures are part of the process of living a life that is worth living. It is how we grow, by changing something and trying something new. True success can only come from doing something new, failing at it and doing it again, just differently.
Never let success get to your head, and never let failure get to your heart.
– unknown
Like the irritation to the oyster, which gets coated over and over again, each new thing we learn becomes a pearl of priceless beauty. Can you look back at your life and say thank you, for the mistakes you made that taught you to laugh at yourself? Those stories that felt painful at the time. Now they are the funniest stories that you and your friends tell each other. It always starts with, “Remember when I . . . ” and then ends with laughter.
Don’t worry about failures, worry about the chances you miss when you don’t even try.
– Jack Canfield
How many opportunities in our life have we walked past, because we were afraid to try? There is nothing worse than a life that you didn’t even try to live. That is where the true regrets in your life come from. The things you did not do.
Love this quote (which didn’t have who wrote it, so unknown)
I AM STRONG
because I know my Weaknesses
I AM BEAUTIFUL
because I am aware of my Flaws
I AM FEARLESS
because I learnt to recognize, illusion from Real
I AM WISE
because I learn from my Mistakes
I AM A LOVER
because I have felt Hate
and . . . ,
I CAN LAUGH
because I have known Sadness
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Listen To The Heart
What’s life without a little risk?
– J.K. Rowling
Life is about taking risks. Every choice is in reality a risk. A risk of achieving something great and wonderful; a risk of failure; a risk of not doing or doing the right thing. The great secret of the phrase, “taking a risk”, is that no matter what happens, we get something wonderful. If we take a risk and it turns out just like we wanted, we are happy. If we take a risk, and it doesn’t turn out well, we still have something wonderful from the experience, we have knowledge, experience, and the combination of those two things is wisdom. We can then look at what we tried to do, remove a piece, tinker with it, add something new and try again. The only way to truly fail, is to do nothing, to risk nothing.
And then there is the most dangerous risk of all – the risk of spending your life not doing what you want on the bet you can buy yourself the freedom to do it later.
– Randy Komisar
Being wise beyond our fears, means recognizing that the true directions of the heart, require no words. There is simply a knowing inside. It just feels better, when we go in the direction of the heart. When you make the decision based on the hearts guidance, you feel the weight of the decision slide off your shoulders. There is no second guessing.
To live your greatest life, you must first become a leader within yourself. Take charge of your life. Begin attracting and manifesting all that you desire in life.
– Sonia Ricotti
When you say the words out loud, that only your soul has dared to whisper to the heart, that is when miracles happen. The declaration, both verbal and written gives notice to the divine that you are listening. Listen to your dreams. That is when you open to the unexpected, and miracles happen. When your mind and heart is too filled with the worlds noise, your dreams may be the only way that your souls whisper can be heard by the heart.
Let your heart be your guide on all things, but you have to listen closely because it speaks so softly.
– John St. Augustine
Each whisper of the soul to your heart speaks of the next leg of your journey. There are times on your journey when experience and reason tell you not to follow that path. Your mind sees the risks and wants to play it safe. But you have to give it a try. I’ve always loved the play on words – when you find yourself “now here” instead of “no where” is that moment of just being. That moment of space of being fully conscious, because you have to be fully conscious to hear the whispers of your heart.
Sometimes, you find yourself in the middle of nowhere, and sometimes, in the middle of nowhere, you find yourself.
– Unknown
When you don’t listen to the whispers of the soul to your heart, sooner or later, that whisper turns into a scream. When the whisper has turned to screaming in desperation, it is usually a sign that your life is about to shift into some sort of test. This comes about because instead of listening to your own heart, you are playing it safe. Playing it safe, is being a diamond in the ruff. A raw diamond looks a lot like common quartz, it is cloudy looking.. But cut it perfectly and shine it up, and everyone knows it is a diamond. We all have these exceptional qualities and potential. But we are afraid to stand out from the crowd, and so we hide ourselves, even from ourselves. Everybody wants to be a diamond, but very few are willing to get cut.
Take risks in your life. If you win, you can lead. If you lose, you can guide.
– Swami Vivekananda
It is so easy to become focused on others instead of ourselves. We get pushed and pulled in all directions by our work, our friends and our families. When those that we are surrounded by see us listening to our heart, they get scared. Changes that you make in your life, will impact theirs. They are afraid of many things, but primarily that you may out grown them. That you will leave them behind.
The only difference between fear and excitement is your attitude about it.
– Unknown
Don’t let their fears break your soul. They may try to expose your shadows, your imperfections, the things that lurk inside of you with feelings of shame or guilt. They are just trying to stop you from listening to the heart. God has put into our hearts, an intuitive guidance system to guide us to what we need, the next step on our path. Follow that guidance. When you do, you will know it because your heart will be at peace. Even the most painful and difficult decisions are correct, if the heart is at peace with it.
Take charge of your choices. Choose to look up, when life presses you down. Choose to smile, when life frowns at you. Choose victory, over defeat.
– Unknown
Be wise beyond your fears ,and keep heading towards your glorious destiny. If the dream keeps reappearing in your thoughts, go for it. That is destiny calling you and it is always worth the price of admission.
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Strong Women Value Themselves and Each Other
The devil whispered in my ear, “you’re not strong enough to withstand the storm.” Today I whispered in the devil’s ear, “I am the storm”.
– Unknown
We are all stronger than we know or think we are. I come from a long line of strong pioneer women. My great, great grandmother came across the Oregon Trail as a young girl. The wagon train that her adopted family was part of was attacked by Indians. She was adopted by the tribe and given to an Indian brave that she had two girls with. One day a French Canadian trapper saw her and offered to take her back to the white people. My great grandmother was hidden in an oak barrel for two days scared that if she made a sound she would be killed. When she reached Oregon and the white people my great grandmother suffered the prejudice of being a half breed. Her mothers tale was one of rescue, her tale was something else.
In my own life, my parents were divorced when I was four because my mother had an affair and became pregnant with another married mans child. She moved us around a lot and it wasn’t until I was in high school that I went to the same school the entire grade. She was married five times and had numerous other relationships looking for something outside of herself, to fill the hole within. At one point when I was thirteen years old we were homeless because we had no where to go when her current relationship failed. That was when I knew that my life would be different. She taught me that you couldn’t find anything outside of yourself to fill the need you had inside. It had to come from within. Even though she made a lot of bad decisions, she was the strongest woman I have ever known. I come from a long line of strong women. This is what they taught me:
Above all, be the heroine of your life, not the victim.
– Nora Ephron
Strong women know that sometimes we just need to sit with the questions until a direction is clearly revealed.
Strong women can sit with another woman in the silence without needing to say anything to break the tension.
Strong women know that when another woman is venting she doesn’t want anything to be fixed, she just needs someone there to witness the removal of the splinter that is causing her pain.
Strong women know that they must make their own light. And if as it sometimes happens that their light goes out, another sister will be there to share hers, until we are strong enough to relight our own.
Strong women know that when the light goes out, we are facing the day, when we question everything. When something so tragic happens that all of our foundations crash into dust.
This is the day when we all circle around our sister as she faces her crisis of faith and reveals the doubts which will birth a new creation. This is the day when we nurture her. When each sister holds the soul of the other ,and whispers the words of transformation.
This is the day of transformation which strips away the old way of being. Rising like a phoenix from the fire, we are reborn, fully transformed.
No longer trying to be what others want us to be, we accept “us” without reservations or restrictions.
Strong women know that when you stand strong for yourself, you are standing strong for all of us. When this belief is fully understood and lived, incredible things happen.
We value who we are, no matter what anyone else thinks.
We forgive ourselves completely.
We trust ourselves wholeheartedly.
We are brave enough to love ourselves just as we are, perfectly imperfect.
We empower ourselves to fully embrace our intuition.
We begin to live our life being the wonderful creation we are.
We fully realize the power of being a goddess, and that nothing can hurt us or stop us, except us.
A strong women doesn’t hold back either the laughter or the tears, because both cleanse the soul.
A strong women doesn’t apologize for knowing how to be both soft and powerful.
A strong women in her essence, her entelechy, is a gift to herself, to her tribe, and to the world.
I choose to be kind because it makes me happy. But I will defend my boundaries and my loved ones without hesitation. Make no mistake: I am fierce.
– Nanea Hoffman
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Listen To Your Heart, Hear The Music Of Your Soul
The visual here is of listening to nature. The wind, the silence of the deep night, that is the time our heart speaks. The mind quiets in expectation of what might happen. It waits in silence to see what the soul wants to be expressed. Then it becomes busy with plans and ideas and arguments for and against every thought.
“It’s the heart that knows the path, the mind is just there to organize the steps”– Jeff Brown
Your heart knows things that your mind can’t explain. When you drop down into your heart to listen, it is like listening to God, as he answers our prayers. There is a peace to it that is hard to explain. There are what I term “Kairos” moments, where the connection to mind, body and soul are wide open. Into the depths of the open space time stands still. There is an awakening, a sigh, a moment of seeing something out of the corner of the eye. In the space between the inhale and exhale of breath God speaks to us.
Like the stillness of a lake, where not even the breath of wind disturbs the surface. Then there is a single rain drop that hits the center of the lake, and the ripple slowly spreads out to lap at the shoreline. Then another drop, and another drop, a downpour begins. The ripples expand out and over each other. The surface of the water is in chaos. Each ripple ends at a different part of the shore, spreading out the details and nuances of the message. And suddenly our soul knows the answer that we have been seeking. All of this happening between the inhale and the exhale.
“Open your heart to hear the sweet, pure, positive and loving messages of your soul” – Sue Krebs
You will need some time to take in all of the messages received. Time to process, to both reason and accept without reasoning. When the mind, body and soul are all on a wide open connection, it can seem overpowering. But like the music of the orchestra, if you just slow down your life for a moment, you can hear each instrument as it enters and leaves the music being played.
Disconnect from the electronics for a space of time; no T.V. no radio, no IPhone, no internet. Just sit in contemplation, remembering the messages, the conversation. Just sit, listen and accept. Know that what journey your soul is telling you to take, it is the perfection of divine timing to begin it now.
“Be bold enough to use your voice, brave enough to listen to your heart and strong enough to live the life you’ve always imagined” – Unknown
Your mind will bring in the chaos of the world . Churning your mind into a tornado, it can tear huge holes in your inner peace. It can bring up every mistake, every omission, every single thing that can be viewed as failure to tell you not to take this journey. Not to step upon that particular path. It whips you and beats you with dark images until guilt pours over your heart, drowning it in sorrow that you are unworthy, incapable of going on this journey. It creates confusion and makes you feel lost from your purpose. That you didn’t really understand the message correctly.
“Talk to yourself in two languages – what do I fear and what do I love – in order to balance the body and the soul” – Peter Shepherd
That is when it is vital to listen to your heart and soul. Your heart and soul does not lie about who you are, and why you are here. Listening to your heart you will uncover a wild uncharted world. You will learn what is meant for you, not what others want for you.
When you follow the directions of the cars guidance system, you are listening to someone else tell you how to travel on your life’s journey. You will travel to your destination the fastest route, but are those directions the right way to your destination? You won’t pull off the freeway and travel the backroads. You won’t stop at interesting small towns and walk through shops and find treasures. You won’t meet that interesting older couple in a diner that talk about what it was like when they were young. You will miss out on the life you are supposed to be living.
It takes boldness and courage to listen, because if you are truly open hearted and honest, there are shadows within all of us. This is when you have to be bold in using your voice. You have to be brave enough to stand up, even as you acknowledge that you are not infallible. At your hearts core is a strength that will help you stay in the fight of living the life you have always imagined you could have. It is easy to plan out this kind of life, but life has a way of bypassing your plans and going off in its own directions.
When nothing is making sense in your life, that is when you have to fall in love with every detail of what is happening. When you have to remember, that life is happening for you, not to you. It really comes down to attitude and perspective in the end.
“In the end, only three things matter: how much you loved, how gently you lived, and how gracefully you let go of the thing not meant for you” – Unknown
“People will want you to behave in a certain way, to make a certain choice because it reinforces the way they see the world. But you have to do what’s right for you” – Unknown
As always, if you can’t figure out the questions to ask yourself, if self discovery is a puzzle you’ve yet to solve – contact us. We are here for you.