It All Depends On What You Love

“The passage of life’s innumerable events can either grind you down, or serve to remove your rough, sharp edges; and whether you feel punished or polished by these movements all depends upon what you love.” – Guy Finley

Wow – this quote really rocked me – what if the difference between an optimist and a pessimist is simply that the optimist has love? Love that requires them to look behind the actions of others to see what is motivating them – love which moves them to empathy?┬áLove that permeates their being to an inner knowledge that whatever the universe brings to them to experience isn’t beyond their ability to handle and which actually makes them a better person? Love that acts as a polish to make them a shining light in the darkness?

I was watching a movie the other day, one of the Die Hard movies with Bruce Willis and there was a line in the movie that has really stuck with me. They were talking about what makes a hero. Now I can’t quote verbatim what the Bruce Willis character said, but the gist of it for me was that a hero was simply someone who couldn’t look the other way. It was the guy who simply had to step in, even when they knew it would mean trouble for them, even though they didn’t want to get involved. Deep down there was something in their make up, that made them “that guy”.

Have you seen those videos they post online where they create situations in places like a diner, where someone is behaving badly to see what those around them will do? There was one I saw last week where the waitress (actress that really is transgender) was transgender and this customer (actor) was giving her a bad time, saying some really mean disgusting things. There was another customer sitting beside him that was leaving just as he started giving her a bad time. So he sits back down and tells the guy to leave; to leave her alone, and doesn’t leave until the actor does. When they interviewed him later, he had somewhere he had to go, and it made him late, but he couldn’t let that guy continue to humiliate and harass the waitress. He didn’t advocate that he was for or against anything, just that he believed that we all have the freedom of choice and we shouldn’t just others on their choices. He was “that guy”.

I believe that we can all be “that guy”. I don’t think that it is something that we are born with or without. It is love for others. It really does depend on what you love. For our child we will move mountains to help, save, and protect them. When we take that same love, and liberally spread it out to anyone we come in contact with, then we become “that guy”. As I always tell my husband, we have to stop and help because that could be me, or your son, or your daughter that needs help. Wouldn’t you want someone to stop and help your mom, or wife or daughter? If so, shouldn’t you? It all depends on what you love.

Sheryl Silbaugh

I am married with 4 grown children who are all married and currently have 14 grandchildren and two great granddaughters. I work fulltime as a Director at Bank of America and I am the founder of, which is a website and Facebook page dedicated to personal transformation and growth. We all have life's lemons show up in our life, this website helps us to make them into lemonade.