When You Are Lost, You Finally Have The Chance To Find Yourself

As with a heavy fog on a road, what lies ahead on the path of life is never completely clear, but the choices we make can help shape out the shadows  – Bryson Staley

 Years ago when I was a little girl we lived in Long Beach, CA. My mother worked at a nightclub as a bartender. One night (about 2:00 AM) when she got off work, the fog was really bad. The police were on the radio asking people to stay home, and not drive in the fog. My mother thought she could make it home.

When she started driving it was worse than she thought, and she couldn’t even tell where the road was. She saw taillights in front of her and thought that if she just followed them she would stay on the road, and she could make it home.

After driving for a while and making some turns, the car in front of her stopped. The man driving got out of his car and walked back to my mom’s car and knocked on the driver’s side window. “Lady” he said, “you are in my garage.”

Needless to say, he helped her park her car and called a taxi for her. It is a funny story, but there is a life lesson for us in this story.

We are all trying to find our way home. Home is where your purpose is, deep inside of you. It can feel like you are peering through deep, dense, fog and you see nothing that looks like your purpose. So, you tell yourself that you don’t know how to find your way home. You think that what you need, is to find an expert to show you the way home.
If you’re feeling frightened about what comes next, don’t be.  Embrace the uncertainty.  Allow it to lead you places.  Be brave as it challenges you to exercise both your heart and your mind as you create your own path toward happiness; don’t waste time with regret.  Spin wildly into your next action.  Enjoy the present, each moment as it comes, because you’ll never get another one quite like it.  And if you should ever look up and find yourself lost, simply take a breath and start over.  Retrace your steps and go back to the purest place in your heart . . .  where your hope lives.  You’ll find your way again  – Everwood

The problem that can arise when you are trying to find your home, might want to abdicate the process to someone else.

You follow them to their home. It could be a spiritual leader or guru. It could be your parents, spouse or someone else that you really look up to. Even with the best intentions on their part, their home is not your home.

Jewel’s new book, “Never Broken” tells of her own journey to find what “home” is.  I highly recommend it, as it is a sort of autobiography of being lost and finding her way.

I identified some parts of her journey with my own. It highlights how much of an individual process this really is, and how life peels back the layers to expose your foundation.  Then you rebuild your life based on who you really are.  This is when the real you steps forward to answer life’s calling.

It is like the singer or writer, who starts out copying someone else that they look up to and admire. They may become proficient, but there is something in the sound of their own voice, where their own soul sings through.

When you are copying someone else, the image isn’t clear, it becomes pixelated, a poor copy. When you find your own voice, it makes all the difference. That is when the star is born.

When you wander in the fog lost, it is not necessarily a bad thing. You can learn a lot about yourself as you wander.

You will have adventures, learn new things, make new friends. You will also have some losses and misadventures. But at the end of the journey, if you persevere, you will find your way home.

You need to be moving if you want God to show you which way to go –  Joyce Meyers

Things like maps, road signs, a GPS can be helpful. But you must take the time to learn to read and use them correctly. You need to make sure that you are taking the time to listen to your heart. It sends out signals. It gives you directions. You can ask for help, but you don’t want to follow others to their home.

I think that what has helped me the most in my own personal journey the last few years, is that I have attended a lot of workshops/seminars. I have hired coaches to help me learn what I couldn’t figure out by myself. 

What a good coach does, is hold up the mirror to face me, and ask me really good questions to help me see what I am blind to. They give me food for thought, so I can determine for myself if this or that answer makes more sense.
Not until we are lost do we begin to understand ourselves –  Henry David Thoreau
They are like fog lights on the car. Have you ever used them? Driving headlights reflect off the fog and create glare, so that you can’t see. Fog lights have a unique beam shape and they cut through the fog so that you can see. 

There are times in your life when you will be operating from driving headlights that just create a glare that you can’t see past. You will need a coach or someone in your life that is like the fog light.  They can see what you can’t and will be able to help you to see for yourself.  If you are finding that the road is just too foggy, and your headlights are just creating a glare you can’t see through, message us.  We can help you turn on your own fog lights.

Sheryl Silbaugh

I am married with 4 grown children who are all married and currently have 14 grandchildren and two great granddaughters. I work fulltime as a Director at Bank of America and I am the founder of LemonadeMakers.org, which is a website and Facebook page dedicated to personal transformation and growth. We all have life's lemons show up in our life, this website helps us to make them into lemonade.