Specialize In The Impossible

Impossible is just a big word thrown around by small men who find it easier to live in the world they’ve been given than to explore the power to they have to change it.
Impossible is not a fact. It’s an opinion.
Impossible is not a declaration. It is a dare.
Impossible is potential.
Impossible is temporary.
Impossible is nothing.

  – Muhammad Ali

Every great invention and every great exploration are great, simply because at one time, it was considered impossible.

Nothing is impossible to a willing heart – John Heywood

Consider the cell phone you have in your pocket:

• From a phonograph with vinyl records, to CDs to my Ipod – I can now carry around 1,000’s of songs on the cloud downloaded to my cell phone
• From the telegraph to party line phones, to land lines with expensive long-distance rates, to a cell phone that started out in a large box, to what we now carry around in our pocket – we can call anywhere in the world for just pennies a call, and I can talk with family members all over the world at the same time and see them “live” with Skype.
• From old fashion manual typewriters to electric typewriters, to word processors, to desk top computers, to my cell phone where I can text or email someone anywhere in the world and they get it in a minute.
• From pony express mail to mail delivered via planes, trains, and automobiles to email delivered to my cell phone.
• From the black and white TV to technicolor, to High Definition to 3D – I can now watch movies on demand, or TV shows when I want to (on demand) on my cell phone.
• From the camera on my phone I can record, download to YouTube and become a famous person, making my own videos.

I could go on to describe so many things that we now take for granted, that just 100 yrs. ago would have been considered impossible. So, when you think that you are in an impossible situation, remember the words of Muhammad Ali, “impossible is just temporary”.

It is an opportunity to think outside the box and consider the possibilities instead.  Impossible is not a fact., it is only an opinion. 

So, stop thinking that something can’t be done and instead wonder “why not”? The only limits to your dreams are the ones that you self-impose.  In fact, it is when you are in the middle of doing the impossible thing, that you suddenly find yourself.

There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve:  the fear of failure – Paulo Coelho

When I was a kid, they had a show on T.V. called “Mission Impossible”, which later became a movies series.  Every assignment was impossible to do, and somehow, they came up with a way to be successful. 

When you have a dream that others think is impossible, they will think that you are crazy.  They will ask you why you want to try to do such a thing – it is risky, it is dangerous, it is impossible.  But once the impossible thing has been done, then they want to know how you did it.  What’s your secret?

So many of you have lived through unimaginable tragedies in your life. If you can look at what you are capable of being and doing, it gives you hope.  You have hope that so many of the things you see wrong in your world, things that can be made right.

Nothing is impossible, unless you simply decide to live in the world that you have been given. If you decide that someone’s opinion is now a fact, then you won’t have the resources or potential to change it. 

What we can or cannot do, what we consider possible or impossible is rarely a function of our true capability.  It is more likely a function of our beliefs about who we are – Anthony Robbins

What gives me hope is that someone who reads this, is one of those kinds of people.

That you are one of those people who know in your heart that impossible is a dare to do something about it. That impossible is potential that you are going to harness and make something fantastic out of it. The impossible is no-thing, that it is nothing.

Together we can change the world, because for us, nothing is impossible. We can end world hunger. We can end poverty. We can end terrorism. We can end diseases and addictions that take away our loved one’s way too early in life. 

What we need is more people who specialize in the impossible – Theodore Roethke

Live An Inspirational Life

 

“There are two primary choices in life:  To accept conditions as they exist, or accept the responsibility for changing them”  – Dr. Denis Waitley

You can choose to be affected by the world or you can choose to affect the world. This little girl is not thinking consciously about affecting someone’s life, but she is doing so nonetheless. When you are walking down life’s path it is not just coincidence, happenstance, and luck, that you experience. It is an unexplainable, magically chartered course. That is what you see when you look at this girl. 

The girl in this photo isn’t seeing any limitations about what she can see, be or do. She hasn’t yet bought into the story of limitations. For her life is still simple. It can be that way for you too. You don’t have to make everything be complicated. It can be fun, instead of an adrenalin fueled drama of “guess what happened to me today?” It can instead be a joyful, “Guess what happened for me today?” 

Same story, just a different way of looking at it. If you just take a moment to step back from what is happening and say silently to yourself, “I wonder what happens next?” You give your brain a chance to go into curiosity, instead of drama, and you experience a better life.

“You cannot get through a single day without having an impact on the world around you. What you do makes a difference, and you have to decide what kind of difference you want to make” -Jane Goodall

Every person who is, or ever has been a part of your life, changed your life, and you changed theirs. You could put labels on the changes, and call them positive and negative. The truth is that most are simply neither. The story that you tell yourself about them, is what gives them the positive or negative charge in your memory.

“If you’re not making someone else’s life better, then you are wasting your time.  Your life will become better my making other people’s lives better”  – Will Smith

You never know what will happen in your life.  Sometimes something horrible and unforeseen happen.  You go to a peace rally and a terrorist plows his car into a crowd of people and takes the life of a beautiful young woman.  Her parents and friends lose someone they loved and were so proud of.  At the service, they talk about what a wonderful person she was.  You can see how much she meant to so many.  The circumstances of her death have in fact projected her into being a hero.  Someone who stood up for others.  Someone who cared about others, and had a true moral code she lived by.  That is how it plays out in so many peoples lives.  We stand up and talk about them after they are gone. 

From what you hear and read about this young woman, she fits this quote because her death is certainly waking up humanity:

“If you want to awaken all humanity, then awaken all of yourself.  If you want to eliminate the suffering in the world, then eliminate all that is dark and negative in yourself.  Truly, the greatest gift you have to give is that of your own self transformation”  – Lao Tzu

But how much do we communicate about the important things to our friends and family while they are here?  My Uncle Paul got a thank you post on his Facebook page from someone that was best friends with his son when they were growing up. It reminded me of how we all have memories of someone special in our lives that affected us in such a way, that they changed how we saw the world,.  They changed who we chose to be in the world by their actions. Most of the time we never know how we affected someone, because they don’t think to express it. 

Most of the time, our family finds out about it at our funeral, when they feel moved to talk about what we meant to them. This post reminded me of how important it is to say these things to people while they are still alive to hear it.

I edited it slightly, but here is the post. “Hello Paul, hope things are going well for you. I am sending you this note because I wanted you to know that I think of you often. I have never shared this with anyone before, but I have always considered you as my second father. I have tried to model myself after special traits from both my real father and from you.. One of your many special traits that I recognized early on was your very high degree of patience. One example that I think about often, is watching you make constant repairs to your hay bailer. When that damn thing broke you always were ready to fix it with huge degrees of patience, no cussing and no throwing of wrenches. Just fix it, even if the project took all day. And fix it you would. That has to be another one of your special traits, you seemed to be able to do anything and fix anything with confidence. You played a huge role in developing my love for the outdoors. So thank-you for that important role.”

He does a wonderful job of describing my uncle. He is a mechanical wizard. He is very methodical and I don’t remember him ever losing his patience with us, and we certainly did things as young kids that would have tried it. 

What I really loved about this heartfelt expression is that it was just my Uncle being his authentic self that impacted this young man. It wasn’t some heroic act, or awesome talent, it was how he handled himself on a daily basis as he worked on his farm. It was how he made this young man feel.

“I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” – Dr. Maya Angelou

The lesson here is to be your authentic self.  To live on purpose in everything you do in your daily life.  To pursue what sets your soul on fire.  But how do you go about chasing those dreams you have?  Because when you are doing that, you are living a truly magical life.  An inspirational life.  A life that truly impacts and changes not only those you know, but the millions of people around the world you don’t know around the world.  Why?  Because living your life on purpose fulfills your God given destiny.

 

Rise Above The Storm

Sometimes it feels like the bad guys are winning.  Like there is no justice.  That we have been abandoned by our friends, our family, and by God.  It seems like we are burning alive and everyone just stares at us.  You can see them talking to each other about the tragedy.  No hero is showing up to save the day. That moment of tribulation, of complete annihilation of who we are, is a turning point.  All of us go through it at some point in our lives.  Some of us visit this place more than once.

I survived because the fire inside me burned brighter than the fire around me.

  –  Joshua Graham

I always think of the old show, “The Six Million Dollar Man”, Steven Austin.  The line in the show, “we can rebuild him, better than before”.  Sometimes we have to die to who we currently are, in order to be reborn as the person that we are meant to be.  We can rise again.  God did not abandon us.

If you’re not okay, that’s okay.  It will happen sometimes.  But you have to tell yourself that things will be better tomorrow. Even if they’re not better tomorrow, keep telling yourself they will be.  Because eventually, tomorrow will be better.

  – Sam Miller

What we discover in life and in relationships, is that we are not really in control of anything.  Things will happen that we don’t want to happen.  When my mom kicked our 1st stepfather out, my siblings and I were devastated.  We loved him at that moment more than her.  He was the one that really stepped in and took care of us.  He was crying, we were crying, and my mom was standing at the door with a new stepfather asking “our dad” to leave.  We had to accept that he wasn’t going to be in our lives any longer.  We had to let him go, because to continue to cry and beg our mother to bring him back only created trouble for us.

She’s been through hell and came out an angel.  You didn’t break her, darling.  You don’t own that kind of power.

  – BMM Poetry

Then there are the things that we don’t want to know, but have to learn.  One of my best friends in high school had an alcoholic stepmother.  Sometimes she would pass out in the bathroom and we would have to drag her into the bedroom and on to the bed.  We should never have had to experience that, but we had to learn how to clean up after her or she would be horribly mean to my best friend.

Everyone can rise above their circumstances and achieve success if they are dedicated to and passionate about what they do.

  – Nelson Mandela

This was a man who certainly had experience to speak from.  He grew up in apartheid Africa, becoming a lawyer and speaking out against the injustices in his country.  He was arrested for treason and sentenced to life in prison.  He served 27 years in prison and was released in 1990.  He negotiated an end to apartheid and became the first black democratically elected president of his country.  He didn’t come out of prison preaching violence as a way to end the injustices of racism.  He helped to create a new constitution, and emphasized reconciliation.  He received a Nobel Peace Prize for his work.

There comes a time in your life, when you walk away from all the drama and people who create it.  You surround yourself with people who make you laugh.  Forget the bad, and focus on the good.  Love the people who treat you right, pray for the ones who don’t.  Life is too short to be anything but happy.  Falling down is a part of life, getting back up is living.

  – Jose N. Harris

Deep within you is the power to rise above any situation or struggle.  Within you is the power to transform the brokenness that you are feeling into a strong foundation.  Do not lose who and what you are.  Move forward, not building a fortress or wall of protection, but instead building a firm foundation of a new life.

Three things you cannot recover in life:  the word after its said, the moment after its missed and time after its gone.  So choose your words wisely, embrace every moment you have with those you love, and never waste time arguing over things that will not matter in the last 5 minutes of your life.

  – happywivesclub.come

The sun will continue to rise up every morning, and sunset will continue every evening.

The light may feel like it goes out, but it continues on it’s journey.

Feel the burning rage wash through you,

Watch the smoke of injustice as it incinerates your life.

Feel the winds of change, watch the storm surge roll away taking all of your beliefs with it.

Feel the death of a reputation, of knowing the taste of ashes as everything you have worked for blows away.

Now at the end of everything that you knew, that you thought was yours.

Now is when you stand at the crossroads, and choose.

Do you stay in this smoke and desolation of a past life?

Do you stand up, shake it off, and walk down a new path?

Forgiveness is the gift that we can give ourselves, because the haters can only hate by first hating themselves.

 

A person may break your heart and damage your pride, but never ever give them the power to break your spirit.

  -Susan Gale

Journey Wisely.

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Your Real Strength Is In Your Greatest Weakness

Every great dream begins with a dreamer.  You have within you the strength, the patience, and the passion to reach for the stars to change the world – Harriet Tubman

Harriet Tubman certainly walked her talk.  She escaped slavery going to the North.  But she didn’t stay there.  Instead, she made 13 missions to rescue other slaves using the Underground Railroad.  She rescued over 70 families.

When the Civil War broke out, she worked as a scout and spy.  One of the raids that she was part of saved 700 slaves.  She is such a great example of not letting anyone break her soul.  She not only stood firm for her beliefs, but helped hundreds escape slavery.

Harriet had dreams and trusted her intuition.  There are stories of how she would lead the slaves down different paths, because her dreams told her the normal way was not safe, and she was right every time.

We all have had hard times come upon us.  Times when you feel hopeless and helpless, that you cannot take another step.  Days when you feel that the whole world is against you.  Times of loss, of betrayal.  A death in the family, a divorce, a loss of income and status.

People are like stained glass windows.  They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when darkness sets in, their true beauty is revealed only if there is a light from within – Elizabeth Kubler-Ross

It is in these times that you have the choice of your greatest pain becoming your greatest source of strength.  In that moment of surrender, you find the spark to go on.

Derek Rydell tells a story of how he was diving in a coral reef in his book “Emergence”.  Not paying attention, he found himself trapped in a coral bed of fire coral.  Fire coral is poisonous.  Try as he might, he couldn’t see the way out.

He talks about the conversation in his head.  First, he was pleading with God to save his life.  It was let’s make a deal.  Then his imagination was running wild on being found dead from the poison of the coral.  What his friends and relatives would say at his funeral and so on.

Finally, exhausted and seeing the sand sharks swimming towards him in the coral he accepted that he was going to die.  At this moment of complete surrender, no longer fighting, a huge wave came through the coral and swept him up on the only piece of coral that was safe.  He was able to stand and see the only pathway safely out of the coral and return to shore.

This was his moment of waking up.  This was his moment of divine consciousness coming both from within and into him.  It was his “Kairos” moment.  The definition of Kairos is the perfect, delicate, crucial moment, that fleeting rightness of time and place that creates the opportunity for action, words, or movement.

In that space of complete surrender, something inside of him finally released who and what he came to earth to be.  He realized his purpose, his divine mission in life.

When Derek stood up on the one safe place, he was standing in God’s time.  He was outside of time.  For that one moment he was completely in the present moment.  He wasn’t seeing his death in the future.  He wasn’t full of regrets for things he did or didn’t do in his past.  He was in a “Kairos moment”, a time when God takes action moment.  Kairos takes you through time because you are standing outside of linear time.

Now it took time to integrate everything that came to him at that moment, but it was the moment that transformed him completely.  He had to seize that moment, in order to save his life.

Difficult times that challenge you are not meant to destroy you.  They are meant to wake you up to your life’s purpose.  It is up to you to accept it or deny it.

When you accept it, you find strength in overcoming the trial.  You have a clear purpose.

It doesn’t mean that you find an easy life.  It means that you realize why you are here, and you start learning how to accomplish it.

The most important thing in your life is not what you do; it’s who you become.  That’s what you will take into eternity.  You are unceasing spiritual beings with an eternal destiny on God’s great universe – Dallas Willard

Those who refuse to accept their destiny, choose to remain asleep in life.  They become bitter, negative souls, hopeless against life’s challenges.

Like the butterfly whose chrysalis gets opened from an outside source, their wings are weak and not capable of flight.

It is in the struggle to break out of the chrysalis, that the butterfly’s wings grow the strength to take flight.

Discover the path that you are meant to walk.  Celebrate the miles you have come and keep going. Believe in yourself and see yourself as the wonderful inspiring person you really are becoming.

Hello Beautiful!

We tend to live our lives based on what we believe about ourselves, our world, our capabilities and our limits.  Where do those beliefs come from?  More often than not they come from what other people have told us, history, science, religion, culture, family.  What if they’re wrong? – Gregg Braden

Growing up in my family we were assigned these roles.  I was the smart one.  My younger sister was the pretty one.  The Twins were just the twins – mirror images in looks but opposites in actions.  My fourth sister was blond and so different.  My youngest sister was the pest, and my baby brother was the spoiled boy.  I went through most of my life believing that I couldn’t be both pretty and smart – it was one or the other, so because I was smart according to everyone else, I couldn’t possibly be pretty too.

Since I also had the belief that it wasn’t safe to be seen, I didn’t mind not being pretty.

It is interesting how I have always reacted to compliments that are not about my being smart.  If someone comments on my photo for example it makes me uncomfortable because it went against an unconscious belief from my childhood.  I always felt like they were not being honest, they were just being nice.

Every time you are tempted to react in the same old way, ask if you want to be a prisoner of the past or a pioneer of the future – Deepak Chopra

It is kind of funny, but Facebook has actually helped me to release most of this belief.  It has happened in a strange way, because a lot of men try to use Facebook to meet women.  I am sure that this has happened to most of you.  Complete strangers want to be your Facebook friend.  It never occurred to me that this would happen because they were interested in me, I thought it was because they read my posts and liked them.

So, when I would get personal messages that indicated what they were really after I was shocked.  Now while I now screen my friends’ invitations, it did help me to release this belief.  These men and one woman (lol) didn’t know me, so they weren’t just being “nice”.  They saw something that attracted them.

It is kind of funny how your perceptions can literally change things.  They did this study years ago they called Pygmalion in which they were going to give this class an IQ test.  The researchers told the teacher that 5 students who would perform the best.  The teacher wasn’t told that these 5 children were just randomly picked.

From the teacher’s perception these were the 5 brightest students.  The test confirmed that these 5 students were the best in the class.  The teacher’s viewpoint impacted those students.  Something in the way she taught, the feedback she gave, something she did, made those five students “smarter”.

What we are told as children, from our parents, our teachers, our friends and relatives – what the expectations are for our behavior – subconsciously they motivate us to make them true.  Whatever negative beliefs you have about you, you filter through life’s experiences to make them come true for you.  You get what you expect.

The mind and the body are like parallel universes.  Anything that happens in the mental universe must leave tracks in the physical one – Deepak Chopra

The great news is that once you recognize what these unconscious beliefs are, you can change them.  This morning I had to wait for the Microsoft upgrades to finish before I could finish this post.  Every month or so, your computer gets program upgrades.  In this same way, you have the ability to give yourself a program upgrade.  You can change your reality by changing your beliefs.  By creating new expectations.

When you heal damaging beliefs about yourself, you remove limitations which are restricting your personal growth.

If you feel like you are pushing the boulder up a hill about anything in your life right now, examine what your beliefs are around what you are trying to accomplish.  Realize that this belief is not true.  That it probably came from a childhood experience that you then spent every year since proving was true.  And now you have the opportunity to release that belief and upgrade to a new program or belief.

Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate – Carl Jung

It is amazing how everything changes when you do this.  It is like the hose was turned on full blast, but because you had a kink in the hose, you were only getting a drop or two at a time.  Releasing the false belief, unkinks the hose, and your life rushes forward in the direction you were trying to go.  That boulder you were pushing uphill turns into a sled sliding down the hill at top speed.

So, I encourage you to find one limiting belief you have, release it as a misunderstanding, and upgrade that belief into something that serves you.

When You Are Lost, You Finally Have The Chance To Find Yourself

As with a heavy fog on a road, what lies ahead on the path of life is never completely clear, but the choices we make can help shape out the shadows  – Bryson Staley

If you’re feeling frightened about what comes next, don’t be.  Embrace the uncertainty.  Allow it to lead you places.  Be brave as it challenges you to exercise both your heart and your mind as you create your own path toward happiness; don’t waste time with regret.  Spin wildly into your next action.  Enjoy the present, each moment as it comes, because you’ll never get another one quite like it.  And if you should ever look up and find yourself lost, simply take a breath and start over.  Retrace your steps and go back to the purest place in your heart . . .  where your hope lives.  You’ll find your way again  – Everwood

Not until we are lost do we begin to understand ourselves –  Henry David Thoreau

Just Because My Path Is Different, Doesn’t Mean I’m Lost

It’s better to walk alone, than with a crowd going in the wrong direction.

 – Diane Grant

When we try to walk down another persons road, it leads to disillusionment and disappointment. That is because it isn’t “our” road. In the book “The Pilgrimage”, Paulo Coelho said that:

It is our decision to walk, that creates the road ahead of us.

 – Paulo Coelho

Trying to explain to someone what our personal truth is for the path we are walking, is like trying to explain rocket science to a baby.  It isn’t that the baby will never understand rocket science.  It is that the baby isn’t yet developed enough to understand.  We can’t explain our path to someone who isn’t yet at that same stage of their own truth.  It will only create misunderstandings, miscommunications, and lots of frustration.  Even we sometimes can’t put into words the necessity for why we have to do something.  We just know that we have to do it.  It has to do with our being conscious and open minded enough to realize when we are being directed.  It has to do with our acceptance of that direction, even when we don’t know why.

It takes courage to keep walking when the path is obscured by confusion.  TRUST.  BELIEVE.  And just keep walking.  The way will be revealed.

  – Sue Krebs

It is both being courageous and having curiosity, that keeps us forging ahead on the path. It is the journey itself, that grows us as a person. It is our attitude about what happens.  It molds us either for our greater good, or for living out life disappointed as a victim of circumstances and bad luck.  It is the difference between knowing what you need to do, and doing what needs to be done.  It is easy to get the knowledge, but the wisdom only comes from putting that knowledge into action.  It can’t just be “book learning”, it also has to be married to “learning in action”.

Getting lost along your path is part of finding the path you are meant to be on.

 – Robin S. Sharma

It has been said that it’s never about obtaining the “goal”. It is rather about who you need to become, to achieve the goal.  There are many different roads to walk. They go through many different landscapes.  It could be a forest path, with giant trees that shadow the land.  It could be through sand dunes and along beaches.  It could be a path of a river which sometimes meanders slowly, and other times rushes through rapids crushing you against the rocks, and then dumps you down a waterfall.  It could be the hot desert or the frozen tundra.  Each path will require different skillsets in order for you to become the master of your journey.  Different clothing, different shoes, different temperatures to be endured.  Different equipment from ropes, boats, sleds etc. . . .  It is always your choice of where you step, and which path(s) your choose.  If you don’t like the first road you chose, move over to a new one.

You must learn a new way to think before you can master a new way to be.

 – Marianne Williamson

It is always our decision to skip and sing our way along the yellow brick road, or to whine, complain, dragging our feet as we ask “are we there yet”?  Are you standing in your own truth?  Are you walking your own path?  Is your heart guiding you?  Look for the opportunities to better understand the journey.  Look for the helpers to guide us on our path.  The destination or outcome of our journey isn’t what is important.  It is who we are becoming, what we are actually doing that makes us successful.

I have always loved the saying, “It’s not the destination,… it’s the journey”. This is because the path we choose is our journey. It is where we live our life. It is all of life’s experiences. The good, bad, and the ugly. The messy parts, as well as the glorious adventures. We can see treasures every single day, if we just take the time to notice them.  Life goes on, it moves on.  It does it regardless of whether we are saying yes to our destiny or running the other way.  Since the path to happiness lies in the direction of our destiny, why not say yes?  Choose happiness.

Does the walker choose the path, or the path the walker?

 – Garth Nix

Along the way, we live life out loud. We can choose to taste and savor the experiences that that journey brings to us. The more that we can reach out in happiness, joy, and just plain exuberance, the richer our life is. The destination is simply a road sign. A sign that we made it to “X”. Then we begin planning a new destination or goal. It’s all about the road we choose, the path we forge.  Who we are becoming.  What we reveal and release that is not truly who we are at heart.

By choosing the path, we choose the destination.

 –  Thomas Monson

Have you ever heard the saying, “you can’t go home again”?  The reason why is that while you were away, you changed.  You look at things differently.  You think that everything changed.  But in reality it was you who changed.  The house you lived in as a small child, suddenly looks much smaller – the house didn’t change size – but your way of looking at the world changed.  We are all far from who we once were, and we are still farther from whom we are growing into.  What is really scary is when you go home again, and see those who haven’t changed.  They haven’t even put on foot onto their path.  They are still stuck back five, ten, or twenty years ago with the same victimhood mentality.  They are caution signs to keep walking on your path.

One’s destination is never a place but rather a new way of looking at things.

 – Henry Miller

So cast off the bowlines. Sail out of the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds and see where they take you. Remember that you are always only one decision away from a totally different life. Embrace the journey and it will love you back.  Trust your journey, even when you don’t understand where destiny is taking you.  It could just be the biggest, most juiciest trip of your life.

Let yourself be silently drawn by the strange pull of what you really love.  It will not lead you astray.

  – Rumi

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Make Sure To Taste Your Words, Before You Say Them Out Loud

Judging a person does not define who they are, it defines who you are.  It is almost impossible to truly understand what another person has experienced in their life.  Even if you have experienced a similar trauma, you don’t have the same fears, doubts, sorrows or pain that they have, each of which colors their experience of the trauma.

It’s easy to look at people and make quick judgments about them, their present and their past, but you’d be amazed at the pain and tears a single smile hides.  What a person shows to the world is only one tiny facet of the iceberg hidden from sight.  And more often than not, it’s lined with cracks and scars that go all the way to the foundation of the soul.

  –  Sherrilyn Kenyon

That is why the very act of judgment is so harmful.  Most of us have the mean inner critic that creates a lot of havoc in our life.  We really don’t need the additional bench of outsiders judging us too.  Judging doesn’t bring anything positive to the table. 

There is nothing more dreadful than the habit of doubt.  Doubt separates people.  It is a poison that disintegrates friendships and breaks up pleasant relations.  It is a thorn that irritates and hurts; it is a sword that kills.

  – Buddha

What doubt and judgment reflects of us is actually small prejudices.  These small personal judgments or beliefs we make are deceptive because the are like the thorns – tiny, but dangerous.  It works its way into the body and festers,  creating an infection than can imperil your life.  This is what leads to extremist thinking and actions.  It is these thorns that lead to bombings, to being a sniper in a tower shooting innocent people, to so many of the mass murders and terrorist actions we see today.

Allow judgments, expectations, and illusions to fade into the darkness. And in the light, all that remains is love. 

  – Greig Grippen

True empathy for one another means that we step out of the initial judgment or thought that we have about ourselves or another person.  It requires that we look beneath the surface to see what the storms of life have dumped into us.  When you peer into the water of a lake, you see the things hidden from view. There is dirt, mud, rocks, sand, sticks, leaves, things that you expect to find.  But what else might be there?  What has the  rain, wind, flooding dumped into the water over the years? 

There will always be a reason why you meet people.  Either you need them to change your life or you are the one that will change theirs.

  – Unknown

I remember that some divers went into a small lake just a few miles from Seattle-Tacoma Airport after a bad storm.  The lake is surrounded by office buildings and homes.  What they found were lawn chairs, outside tables, and various things that had been blown into the water over the years from the homes around the lake.  They also found a very, very, old hand hewn canoe from a tree, thought to be over 150 yrs old.  Just like this lake had been hiding many things beneath the surface, so do we.  Empathy  is what allows us to dive deep and begin to truly understand what might be going on.

We also have to look at the reason we are making the judgments, from a self improvement perspective.  There is a saying that every judgment we make about others, is about something that we don’t want to admit seeing in ourselves.  So when we make that judgment about somebody’s body being covered by tattoo’s or that they have bright green or purple hair, or that outfit is too young for them and so on and so on.  What is that judgment reflecting about us? 

“Go to the edge.” the voice said.  “No, I’ll fall.” I replied.  “Go to the edge.” the voice said.  “You’ll push me.” I replied.  “Go to the edge.” the voice said.  So I went and I was pushed and I flew.

  – Zen Proverb

I know that in the past for myself, I noticed that I made judgments about people who dressed differently than I did – in ways that drew attention to themselves, it was because I was jealous.  I was too afraid to call that much attention to myself.  Now that I know what was underneath of that judgment, it has shifted into being inspired by their courage.  What judgments do you habitually make that could be shifted into something positive?  Instead of judging others by the results of actions, what if we looked at the initial intentions, exercised empathy and went on from there? 

Life is a balance of holding on and letting go.

  – Rumi

The rush to judgment is the exact opposite of this.  It is a rush to hate on someone, when the true story isn’t even known.  The whole concept of bad news traveling fast is because no one has yet gotten all of the facts.  When my nephew was murdered, the headline in the paper was about one gang member killing someone in a rival gang.  My nephew wasn’t a gang member and had never associated with anyone who was.  He was simply walking through the park late at night taking a short cut to a friends house to get his bike and ride home.  He was just in the wrong place, at the wrong time.  Two days later, the paper corrected itself, on a back page.  We see this happen all of the time on the internet.  Instead, wouldn’t it be nice to see some comments on lets not make judgments until we hear all of the facts of an investigation?

The secret in life is enjoying the passage of time.  Instead of clutching onto the past or fearing the future, experiment with letting go into the mystery of life.  Float on the river of time, curious about its direction, open to its changing nature.  You don’t really know where it’s going, so why not relax and experience the ride?

  – Elizabeth Lesser

Instead lets meet in the field, with the idea of laying aside the blame and judgments.  Lets allow ourselves to live life without the judgment of wrong doing or right doing.  Where instead, we can simply live a more loved filled life.  I know that this sounds like an unrealistic impossible place.  But even if we could come close to the edges of such a field, think about how much our own lives would improve.  About how much the world around us would be improved, just by us trying to live in this space.

In silence there is eloquence.  Stop weaving and see how the pattern improves.

  – Rumi

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Enter Into The Flow of An Ever Changing Life

 “Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don’t resist them – that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like”  – Lao Tzu

Every year in January the majority of us will set goals for the new year. You may call them New Years Resolutions or goals. They can be personal goals such as your weight or physical fitness goals, or business/financial goals. What ever they are they generally designed to enhance your life in some way. 

“Try not to resist the changes that come your way.  Instead let life live through you.  And do not worry that your life is turning upside down.  How do you know that the side you are used to is better than the one to come?” –  Rumi

One thing that I have discovered about myself is realizing when I am pushing a goal to happen in a certain way or time frame, life gets frustrating and hard. But if I step back and look at my goal from the aspect of divine timing, I can usually see that the reason why the goal isn’t progressing. There is something that I am missing, something vital to make it happen. When the progress towards the goal starts to become pushing a boulder uphill, I know now to walk it backward down the hill until the pressure is released. 

“When we resist change, it’s called suffering.  But when we can completely let go and not struggle against it, when we can embrace the groundlessness of our situation and relax into its dynamic quality, that’s called awakening…, Another word for that is freedom – freedom from struggling against the fundamental ambiguity of being human” –  Pema Chadron

I step back and re-look at what I am doing. Re-look at the time table. Re-examine the reasons behind the goal to see if I need to adjust what the goal is trying to accomplish. I love the analogy of flowing downstream in a river. There are these little bays or inlets, eddies in the river where you can float in stillness. In these places, you acquire knowledge, skills, make partnerships, etc.., things that will be needed later down river. You have a chance to examine and revise your goals based on new knowledge. Then when the timing is right, you re-enter into the river and flow further downstream. 

“People don’t resist change.  They resist being changed”  – Peter M Senge

When you step out of the river of change, you are trying to keep your comfort zone in place.  Change threatens your comfort zone.  In the process of trying to keep a stable, balanced comfort zone you step out of the river.  You damn up the divine flow of your life.

• What if . . , instead of using the word “change” which might be threatening, you substituted the word “becoming”.  You are not changing, you are becoming?
• What if . . , instead of thinking that your life is falling apart from the transitions that are happening, you instead saw your life falling together, falling into place?
• What if . . , instead of feeling like you are a puzzle with pieces falling to the ground, you saw yourself as letting go of what no longer belongs in your life?

“It’s not the load that breaks you down, it’s the way you carry it”  – Lena Horne

Stop struggling against the load, Instead, relax and float. You can float for hours. It is the struggle that makes you exhausted, wastes all of your energy and breaks you down, so that you give up. The struggle and the pushing come from trying to force things to happen a certain way.  You can force your foot into a shoe one size too small, but you will only cause blisters and pain for yourself.  Drop the expectations,, stop pushing for change, and let it unfold with divine timing. 

“Change is never painful, only the resistance to change is painful” –  Gautama Buddha

Go within, where the wisdom and clarity reside. Instead of having to defend yourself, or prove something, you discover the compassion to simply let life flow forward and outward in simplicity.

“If you are quiet enough, you will hear the flow of the universe.  You will feel its rhythm. Go with this flow.  Happiness lies ahead.  Meditation is the key.”  Buddha

The way you meet an ending impacts the new beginning.  Or to put another way, the way you meet change impacts who you are becoming.  When a door opens for you, it’s not just something new entering into your life.  It’s your life becoming something new.

Change happens whether you want it to or not.  So stop fighting change.  Stop striving for perfection.  Trying to manage change only slows it down, and your experience of change will be impacted by negative emotions.  Instead embrace change.  Lean into it.  Discover what lessons it has to teach you.  Take a moment to become curious.  Trust that it is leading you into a better tomorrow.

Ending with my two favorite Bruce Lee quotes:

“Empty your mind. Be formless, shapeless like water. You put water into a cup, it becomes the cup. You put water into a bottle, it becomes the bottle. You put water into a teapot, it becomes the teapot. Water can flow or it can crash. Be water, my friend”  – Bruce Lee

And the second one is:

“There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there. You must go beyond them.  I wish you success in growing beyond any plateaus that you are currently experiencing in your life. Be water and flow” – Bruce Lee

This Is The Year I Am Unstoppable

This is the year, that I become the warrior woman that I didn’t think I could be.

This is the year, that every morning begins with a cup of the grandest vision I can imagine.

This is the year that I find the gold inside of me, and don’t try to dilute it.

This is the year that instead of allowing that critical voice inside my head to stop me, I will dust off my stiletto kick ass heals and crush it.

This is the year, that I let the wild and crazy girl go free.

This is the year that no one (not even me), can put out the burning desire that rages deep inside of me.

This is the year that “I am already everything I need”, becomes more than just a saying.

This is the year, that my “will” is stronger than fears resistance.

This is the year that I will forgive myself freely, and love myself relentlessly.

This is the year that my life is a living, breathing, screaming, invitation to believe in better things, not only for myself, but for the whole world.

This is the year that God is bringing new seasons of growth into my life.

This is the year that new doors of opportunity will up-level my life to a glorious future beyond my wildest dreams.

This is the year that the way I live my life, respects and enhances the freedom of others.

This is the year that I will always speak the truth, even if no one wants to hear, or will listen to it.

This is the year that I shine like a beacon through whatever dark nights come.

This is the year that I dance with change and transformation instead of fighting it.

This is the year that passion and purpose become that favorite dress that I wear for all occasions.

This year when I feel the start of something new, I am going to pay attention and follow the directions.

 

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Walk Away – Not From Pride Or Arrogance, But Because That Door No Longer Leads Somewhere You Can Live

We all stand at the threshold of a great adventure every day. It can be a scary place, because we all have our individual self doubts. We have to unlearn the programming that says it is selfish to put ourselves first. It is not selfish to love ourselves, to take care of ourselves, and make our own happiness a priority. As they say on every airplane takeoff, in case of emergency, put your own oxygen mask on first, then you can help others. 

Every soul is beautiful and precious; is worthy of dignity and respect, and deserving of peace, joy, and love. 

 –  Bryant McGill

You cannot change what is going on around you, until you start changing what is going on inside of you. We need to put on that oxygen mask, so we can take stock of what inside of us is not working. We need to let go of what is not ours to fix, put up with, or allow to continue happening.

We are all born with a purpose and a passion.  It is up to you to seek out that purpose and find your passion.

 – Billy Cox

We are fragile human beings who can be destroyed by another’s words or actions. If we are not being treated with love and respect, we need to see what value we have assigned to ourselves. The people that we surround ourselves with are a reflection of how we view ourselves.  We need to get off the “reduced last chance sale rack”, and get inside the fancy glass case where the precious jewels are displayed.

You are determining the future you every day.  Will the decisions you make today lead you closer to the person you want to be tomorrow? 

– Brenna Smith

How many times for example has someone said, “Where to you want to go to dinner?” and your answer was that you didn’t know or didn’t care.  You do know what you feel like eating, but somehow, you always say, “it doesn’t matter, what you do want?”  The scriptures say something like, he who is faithful in little things, is faithful in bigger things.  What it is talking about is the principle of patterns.  What you do in the big things has been formed by the habits of what you do in the little things.  The habit of always putting others before you, started in the smaller things, like what do you want for dinner.

Be authentic!  Don’t lower your dreams to fit it with others.  If people can’t celebrate your dreams, they are probably not your friends.

 – Phineas Kinuthia

We may be afraid that no one will listen to us, so why speak.  We may be terrified that they will laugh at our dreams and say they are unattainable. We fear being judged as unworthy, not enough.  We don’t want to be all alone and so we abdicate our life away, so that we will be accepted and fit in. This is the story that we tell ourselves so that we don’t have to change.

Instead we can start making choices that feed us, energize us. We can choose to be unstoppable. To be bigger than any worries that are buzzing around us. Those buzzing worries are just scenario’s that no longer serve to build us up. Release what is no longer serving you. Open the window shooing the fly to go buzz its way outside.

Sometimes the hardest thing to do, is also the right thing to do.

The universe is always speaking to us . . . sending us little messages, causing coincidences and serendipities, reminding us to stop, to look around, to believe in something else, something more.

– Nancy Thayer

You are more than you have shown yourself to be so far. You are more than you have been willing to see. You are stronger than you know. Trust your intuition and live a courageous life. 

Respect your efforts, respect yourself.  Self respect leads to self discipline.  When you have both firmly under your belt, that’s real power.

– Clint Eastwood 

Today is the day to get up and walk down your sacred path. Choose to dwell in divine possibility. Awaken to the divine guidance that has been sending you messages. Believe in the divine plan, that you are more capable than you ever dreamed. Remember that you will never had to sacrifice your dignity for your destiny.  If it feels like that is the choice, then your intuition is telling you to pass that choice by. 

Be not the slave of your own past – plunge into the sublime seas, dive deep, and swim far, so you shall come back with self-respect, with new power, with an advanced experience, that shall explain and overlook the old.  

– Ralph Waldo Emerson

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We Can Go Further Than We Think

Years ago, when I was young, I had opinions on what would I do, if “such and such” happened in my life. I think that when most of us hear of an experience that someone has, we think “well if that happened to me, this is what I would do”.

You might not agree with the decision that another has made, when your imagined scenario happens to them.  But you have no idea why they made the choice they made.  You don’t know all of the circumstances and limitations they were facing.

The lemons that life gives you are not supposed to paralyze you.  They are not supposed to make you bitter.  They are not supposed to make you give up on life.  They happen to help you dig down deep and discover what you are capable of.

“Who I am and what I am capable of doing has always managed to surprise me” – Jodi Picoult

When life does hand you lemons (your imagined scenario), and you are the one trying to make lemonade out of it, many times you come to a totally different decision.

There are many reasons for this. Each of life’s lemons come to you wrapped up in a different series of circumstances. You could look at multiple experiences of someone losing a loved one to violence, and you would find that each instance was handled in a different way.

While the label may be the same “man killed by random shooting”, the circumstances in each case tell their own unique story.

In 1995 Tariq a pizza delivery man was shot and killed by a 14-year-old gang member. Initially Azim, Tariq’s father could barely function. But he came to understand that the 14 yr. old boy named Tony who killed his son, was also a victim.

He felt called to forgive Tony and became friends with Tony’s grandfather and guardian. He started a foundation to help kids stop killing other kids. He began talking with kids in schools about the realities of that lifestyle and the importance of making right choices.

“From the onset, I saw victims on both ends of the gun. I will mourn Tariq’s death for the rest of my life. Now, however, my grief has been transformed into a powerful commitment to change. Change is urgently needed in a society where children kill children” – Azim, Tariq’s Father

He made lemonade out of his lemons. This foundation (http://tkf.org/) has grown into an organization of 13 full time staff members and 30 volunteers that mentor over 20,000 students each year. In the article I read, in 13 years they had touched eight million kids (this same foundation is now over 24 years old).

But I would bet that if you had asked him if this were the road he would take if someone killed his son, this is not the answer he would have given. His unknown road that he journeyed on revealed what kind of man he truly was. This is forgiveness in action. 

You are on a road, a journey to discover who you really are. What you are capable of becoming.

“No one saves us but ourselves. No one can and no one may. We ourselves must walk the path” – Buddha

Azim saved himself by walking the path of true forgiveness. He wanted to not only prevent other innocents from being killed, but he also wanted to save those other victims – “kids” becoming killers themselves. His difficult road has led to a beautiful destination – saving others.

What I have learned in life, is to hope that I can emulate the grace I see in others’ lives, as they grapple with life’s lemons. That until I find myself in that same hard place, I don’t really know what my decision will be. I do know that there is no turning back. So, each decision needs to be made in prayer and meditation, with that understanding.

The challenge is not just discovering who I am

but loving what I find.

What can you learn from the lemons in your own life? 

• To never allow someone to make you swallow your soul and make you feel small.
• To never dam up the words in your heart that are crying to be released. 
• Don’t apologize for your imperfections, you are perfectly imperfect.
• Don’t allow the darkness of others to cover up your light, share it with everyone instead.
• Trust your intuition, it is always right.
• Live a more courageous life. 

Who are you? 

A person of deep strength who keeps walking the path, knowing that new wonders are going to be revealed right around the next bend.