Prayers
Our prayers go out to this poor family and the tragic murder of this beautiful boy. I totally agree with Brittni Lasuramore who said, “You don’t think something like this will ever happen to your family, ever,” Brittni Lauramore said. “I don’t know one person that could ever imagine something this horrible happening.” This is the thought that I think that everyone probably has, when you lose a loved one to violence, no matter the age.
My nephew was murdered almost six years ago, so I have some experience with how long the road is ahead of them. This month is his birthday and we still constantly think of him and miss him. I wish them peace in their hearts, and hope that they can grab onto the joyful memories. I hope that since his killer is going to plead guilty, that the justice system will be swift in providing them with some sort of closure.
They are having a vigil Thursday at 6 P.M., in the church near where they found his remains. Lighting candles to guide him on his new journey.
We wanted to acknowledge the generosity of the V. Todd Ferreira Funeral Services, who have offered to pay for Lonzie’s funeral. The families have known each other for years and this is something that good friends would do for each other.
But V. Todd Ferreira Funeral Services makes this offer for every child. “As long as I’ve been in business, I’ve never charged for a child. Ever,” Todd Ferreira said. “This is no different.” What a wonderful gift they have been giving to grieving families.
“What is important to us is Lonzie and his family, and that’s what we are committed to,” said Todd Ferreria. “And to giving him a special goodbye. One that he deserves.”
Ferreira is working with Lonzie’s family to plan the funeral and burial and said relatives from both sides are of Lonzie’s family are involved in the process.
Ferreira said he believes that the funeral will be open to the community, so that all the people who poured their hearts and souls into searching for the toddler will get to pay their respects and honor him
Follow Your Dreams for They Know the Way
Dreams come preloaded with a guidance system. They know the fastest way to bring themselves into reality.
They also come with more than one path. I say this, because the fastest way is “as the crow flies” which means it is usually the harder path to take. Most of us would prefer the shortcut. The Staples “easy button”.
It might be that we are not confident of our ability to take that harder path. I am a huge “Lord of the Rings” fan. When Frodo and Samwise go forward on the journey with just the two of them, they are definitely taking that hard path. I always thought that if the Eagles could rescue them at the end when the lava was coming to kill them, why couldn’t they have dropped them off at the mouth of the cave?
The reason of course is that Frodo and Samwise needed to learn many things to enable them to win over the power of the ring and truly destroy it. Without those lessons, the ring would have won.
So it is with us. The harder path will teach us what we need to win through to the dream and be able to handle the changes that acoomplishing the dream will make in our lives. If we take the easy path, the shortcuts, then we may not have the strength of character that has been tested and forged in the fire. Without this, our ultimate dream may not be able to make it into reality.
So even when the dream points us in a direction that we think is too difficult, that we don’t think that we possess the courage or skills to make happen – it is in our ultimate best interest to pull up the big girl/boy panties and go for it. I always tell myself, that if the divine gave me this dream, then he also must have given me the skills needed to make it happen. So follow the breadcrumbs and storm the castle!
Wild Woman, You Were Not Made to be Tame
Be an original Wild Woman – Shake off whatever is holding you back.
This reminded me of Taylor Swift’s song “Shake it Off” with the lyrics:
‘Cause the players gonna play, play, play, play, play
And the haters gonna hate, hate, hate, hate, hate
Baby, I’m just gonna shake, shake, shake, shake, shake
I shake it off, I shake it off
Heart-breakers gonna break, break, break, break, break
And the fakers gonna fake, fake, fake, fake, fake
Baby, I’m just gonna shake, shake, shake, shake, shake
I shake it off, I shake it off”
There are times in our lives where we hear unkind words that have been said about us; where we get those looks of judgment from others as we walk by. When that someone we thought would be our “happy ever after” leaves us. When we have to leave what we love, and move on because what we love is not healthy for us. We lose a job or a best friend. So many things that we have to shake loose and shake off.
All of these situations require us to love ourselves enough, that we remain our own center. That we focus our energy not on looking backwards and fighting to keep the same old way of life, but on building a new life. That we shake off the hurt, the dissapointment, the feeling of abandonment or betrayal. That we forgive ourselves for where we failed and forgive others for not living up to our expectations. Be proud of who you are now.
Decide that your life is yours alone, and celebrate it. Shake off the apologies, the excuses, the blame. Realize that in order to shine, sparkle and glitter, sometimes you need to be cut out of parts that don’t belong, and shine the parts that do.
Courage is a Love Affair with The Unknown
“Alice: How long is forever?
White Rabbit: Sometimes, just one second” Lewis Carroll
Life seems like that sometimes. I remember years ago that we were driving north on I-5 in Oregon and we had just crested the top of a hill around Roseberg. You could see quite a ways in front of you as the road sloped down into a valley. Ahead of us was a semi tractor trailer and he ran over something like shiny metal in the road. Immediately his tires blew and he started swerving and then the whole rig tipped onto it’s side. For a moment it was like slow motion, I could see so many small details as the whole scene played out like a movie. Then whoosh, time sped back up and my husband was pulling off the road and running back to make sure the driver was ok. He was just shocked by what had happened. But for me, it was the weirdest experience of time I have ever had. It was like the rabbit said, forever came in just one second.
Alice’s courage with the unknown in Wonderland, came from a great deal of curiosity. She fell into an unknown world of adventure, and nothing was as it should be. Sometimes in our life, we feel like that. The world around us seems out of control. We might think like Alice “I knew who I was this morning, but I’ve changed a few times since then”.
In order to embrace change, we need a great deal of courage. Change in our lives today is speeding up, faster and faster. This speed of change is impacting every facet of our lives. It changes the education system, the business world, and our personal lives. I saw a cute video the other day where the family was in a hotel room and the dad handed the telephone receiver to his young daughter to hang it up and she didn’t know what to do. All she had experience with was a cell phone.
Technology changes our world moment by moment. Political upheaval can change borders in a moment. Our belief systems can swing from one absolute truth, to a new absolute truth. It takes a lot of courage to stay in that place of curiosity and not become mired into taking rigid stands against someone whose belief is different from us. It takes a lot of courage to change beliefs that we have had for a long time, and have to finally acknowledge that we have outgrown them.
It takes a lot of courage to have a love affair with the unknown – it means that we are constantly learning something new and each new thing means we let go of an old belief. You may think like Alice “this is impossible” but as the Mad Hatter replied, “Only if you think it is.” My favorite line is “Why, sometimes I’ve believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast.”
Enjoy the journey, do the impossible, and be a just a tiny bit Mad like the Mad Hatter.
Forget all the Reasons it won’t Work and Focus on the One Reason it Will
I love this quote with this photo. When you are climbing, you have to have singular focus on what you are doing. Where is the next hand grip? The next place to wedge in your foot? Constantly looking up the wall of rock to find the easiest way up.
It is very easy to find reasons why we can’t do something. Can’t however is usually masking “I don’t want to”, “It’s too hard”, “too much effort”, “it won’t work”. These are all rungs up a ladder that goes nowhere.
At work I hear things, like I am stuck at this job because no one is hiring people over 50 yrs old. Or no one is hiring anyone without a college degree, or you need more experience than I have. No one in the past five years has been promoted or received a raise, so you have to go outside the company to get ahead. Whatever the complaint, the “reason” will be something that they can’t control or change.
All of these reasons why something won’t work will stand in our way as long as we have a belief in them. I love the work of Byron Katie because her four questions show us the fallacy of believing these “reasons”.
1. Is it true? (Yes or no. If no, move to 3.)
2. Can you absolutely know that it’s true? (Yes or no.)
3. How do you react, what happens, when you believe that thought?
4. Who would you be without the thought?
Then she does what she calls the turnaround question – the turn around question puts the thought to the opposite end of the statement. The purpose of this is to welcome all your thoughts and experiences with open arms, so that you lose the resistance to what is actually true.
The 2nd question is my favorite, because in reality we can never know that our “reason” is absolutely true. This is because no matter what the rule is, there is always an exception to the rule. Most of the things that we believe about ourselves and others are just stories our minds have made up. None of them can pass question #2.
The follow up with question #4 – who would you be without that thought? You would be the person who uses focus to accomplish the dreams and/or goals that are set before them. In this photo, you would be the woman who climbs up the wall to the top successfully.
In our other examples, you would be the person who finds their dream job, because they focused on what they wanted instead of what they didn’t want. You would be happy for having accomplished what you set out to do, and didn’t allow negative thoughts to cloud your judgment or stop you in your tracks.
You are Braver than You Believe
Pooh Bear once said “when you see someone putting on his big boots, you can be pretty sure an adventure is about to happen”. Adventures are sure to happen when we look at our life and realize that some changes need to be made.
We all have these dreams and aspirations that get buried under “to do” lists. We check off daily house cleaning chores, grocery shopping, taking kids to sport or music programs, taking care of elderly parents and the list of duties and obligations go on and on.
What sometimes happens is that we start perpetuating and growing the list of responsibilities because we start hiding behind the reasons and excuses of not having enough time to work on dusting off the dream and working to bring it into reality.
For years I told myself that I didn’t have the time to write. I had a fulltime job that entailed lots of overtime, four kids to raise and a husband to take care of. Where in all of that was time to find a quiet space to write? So I told myself, when the kids grow up, then I would write. Well the kids grew up and still there was a large list of reasons why I didn’t have the time.
What was really happening is that I was terrified that I didn’t have anything worthwhile to say. That you would read what I wrote and laugh your head off, or even worse stop reading after the first paragraph and I would just hear the sound of silence or boredom.
I think that Facebook was the thing that started me dipping my toes in the water. I would find a quote I liked and do a paragraph or two about the quote on my personal page, and it stayed small because Facebook limited me to the number of words. I would spend more time cutting out words than it took me to write it. Anyway friends and family liked the post (which I thought meant they were just being nice) and then something interesting happened. They started complaining when I wasn’t posting anything.
Then Facebook took away the word limit and they grew a little larger. Then I started this LemonadeMaker page. I started creating my quotes on a photo and expanding the writing a little more. And before I realized what was happening you showed up and not only liked my post, you commented on it and liked the page. I started believing in myself, because you gave me the confidence to believe in myself.
That is what I believe is true of all of us. We are all BRAVER than we believe we are. I put my thoughts out and what I found is I can have a conversation about them and you may or may not agree with me, and that is ok. I discovered that I could survive differences of opinion. We are all STRONGER than we think we are. We are all SMARTER than we think we are.
I have a different way of looking at the world. I love to find multiple meanings in words. I think that words are like colors and have these shades of color waiting to be explored. It gives each word depth and height and width. As people we have these hidden sides to us. When you look at the stories of those who go through fiery experiences in their lives you see what they learn about themselves and others. It gives new meaning to what humanity is all about.
I am so glad that I take the chance each day to express my thoughts, as those thoughts are creating a community of souls that I believe are filled with simply amazing people – and yes that means you! You encourage me each day to express my thoughts and I hope in turn that I can encourage just one person each day that life is not only worth living – but that we are all brave enough and strong enough to climb to the tops of mountains, and explore the depths of valleys and swim in the oceans.
Helping Hand
It is 45 degrees outside and only going to get colder on a NYC winter night. You walk by a homeless man who is shivering with the cold. What crosses your mind?
Resto noticed something was wrong. Typically he gives food or money to help. While other people were just staring at the man, he went a step further. This young man literally gave him the shirt off his back and the hat off his head. Wow!
He thought that the homeless man may have been in a fight earlier. He invited him to go with them to his house for a hot meal, but the older man fell asleep and they didn’t want to disturb him.
A stranger video taped the whole thing and posted it online. Resto states he would love to thank him with a cup of coffee.
see the video: Good samaritan
See more: Shirt off his back
David Bowie
David Bowie’s death was announced today and I learned something important about him. Not only was he a talented musician and actor, he was also a history maker.
This from the German Foreign Office: “Good-bye, David Bowie. You are now among #Heroes. Thank you for helping to bring down the #wall #RIPDavidBowie”
In June 1987, David Bowie returned to the divided city of Berlin for a concert that some Germans, still view as having helped change story.
In 1977, the year Bowie recorded Heroes, the second of his three Berlin albums, East German border guards shot and killed 18-year-old Dietmar Schwietzer as he tried to flee west across the wall; a few months later, 22-year-old Henri Weise drowned trying to cross the Spree River. Heroes was haunted by the Cold War themes of fear and isolation that hung over the city. Its still-famous title track tells a story of two lovers who meet at the wall and try, hopelessly, to find a way to be together.
Bowie returned for the Concert for Berlin, a three-day open-air show in front of the Reichstag, he chose “Heroes” for his performance. The wall couldn’t keep out radio waves., and there were thousands on the other side that had come close to the wall. So it was like a double concert where the wall was the division. You could hear them cheering and singing along from the other side.
“The mood was one of enjoying forbidden fruit,” Olof Pock, then a 15-year-old kid living in East Berlin, later told Deutsche Welle. “We knew that this was somehow being done for our benefit.”
When Bowie performed on the second night, he began by telling the crowd, in German, “We send our wishes to all our friends who are on the other side of the wall.” He sang “Heroes,” the song he’d recorded in Berlin a decade earlier amid the city’s Cold War fear and violence.
Though “Heroes” is today remembered as an anthem of optimism and defiance, its lyrics capture the hopelessness and desperation of a city divided, friends and family in the East kept apart from their loved ones in the West by violence and terror. The song’s narrator pleads, “I wish you could swim / Like the dolphins, like dolphins can swim,” a reference to the East Germans, like Weise, who died trying to cross the Spree.
The lyrics, remembered in this context, are tragic, each verse ending with the line “nothing can keep us together”:
I, I can remember (I remember)
Standing, by the wall (by the wall)
And the guns, shot above our heads (over our heads)
And we kissed, as though nothing could fall (nothing could fall)
And the shame, was on the other side
The song ends with a plea that eventually things will change, if only for a day:
We’re nothing, and nothing will help us
Maybe we’re lying, then you better not stay
But we could be safer, just for one day
On the final day of the three-day show, East German authorities decided that they’d had enough. Police in areas near the wall, where young East Berliners had gathered to listen, cracked down violently, attacking people with water cannons and arresting some 200. “They kept arresting people, dragging them along the surface of the street. It was like a horror movie. We were enraged,” an eyewitness told Deutsche Welle.
“Many of the eyewitnesses claim that the violent police crackdown on the third night of the concerts … were crucial in changing the mood against the state,” the Guardian has written. East German authorities, by overreacting, had turned the gathering of concert listeners — people who just wanted to hear music — into a subversive political act.
A week later, US President Ronald Reagan visited West Berlin and, standing in front of the city’s famous Brandenburg Gate, called on Soviet leader Mikhail Gorbachev to “tear down this wall.”
Reagan’s speech, along with the Concert for Berlin a week earlier, had helped change the mood around the wall, which had stood in some form or another for more than a generation.
Our dreams are calling us
How dare you settle for less when the world has made it so easy for you to be remarkable. – Seth Godin – Author and Speaker Our dreams are calling us. Are we answering them or putting them to voice mail, because we don’t want to have that inner conversation with ourselves. What causes us to put things on hold? How many of your dreams do you have in voice mail waiting for a return call? We all do this in some way. I know that if someone compliments me the first thought in my mind is discounting what they said. When I was growing up my sister closest in age to me was always the pretty one, the beautiful one. She is 18 months younger and her body matured faster than mine. She is several inches taller than my 5’3″. I was the smart one. This comparison ran through our childhood. She to this day carries that role of not being smart, even thought it isn’t true, and I carry the role of not being pretty. This past few weeks my personal FB page has really been growing. I think that FB has been showing my photo for my personal page up in “the people you know timeline”. My guess is that it is a combination of how many of you wonderful people are “Liking” our LemonadeMaker posts and page (Thank You!!!) and, as I am part of several large groups I end up having a lot of similar friends. I also think that some people figured out I am the founder of LemonadaMakers and request my personal fb friend page too. However it is happening, there has also been some of those requests that even though I try to screen them turn out to be men looking at my picture and requesting a friendship. When they say they like my smile – which is the usual first comment they make, I immediately think something negative like that’s because you don’t see the rest of me. Why do we do that? What is it that causes us to turn away from a compliment about our looks, the quality of our work – anything that seems personal? People could compliment me about my children or grandchildren and I don’t turn away from that. Only if it is personal about me. There was a commercial video I saw a few months back talking about the phrase “sorry” when we mean “excuse me”. We are apologizing when we didn’t do anything wrong It was by Pantene the shampoo company and it really reflected how many times we use it when we really mean something else. We open a office door to talk to someone and say “sorry”. We brush by someone and say “sorry”. The list goes on. Look for it in the next few weeks, how many times you or another women says “sorry” when what should be said is “excuse me”. The suggestion is that we feel undeserving, and so say “I’m Sorry” for taking up your time, for taking up space, for thinking that I might have something to contribute. Sheryl Sandberg was really talking about this when she said “we’ve got to get women to sit at the table.” She talked about how she went to a conference room for a meeting and the women were not sitting at the conference table, they were sitting around the table in the extra chairs against the wall. They were doing this even though there were empty seats at the conference table. She felt that a big piece of why we don’t take a seat at the table is because we don’t want the label of “bossy” and the other “B” word when we take the lead. We shouldn’t be afraid to be as ambitious as men. We should ask for what we want – the raise, the promotion, to take the lead. We shouldn’t be afraid to be told we have a beautiful smile. So I am ending this with my most favorite quote by Marianne Williamson because – How dare any of us settle for less when the world is waiting for us to be remarkable! “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?’ Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” ― Marianne Williamson, A Return to Love: Reflections on the Principles of “A Course in Miracles”
A real miracle
A real miracle. My youngest son was in an accident that he survived by a miracle. It took the fire department hours to get him out of the vehicle and he had traumatic injuries. He too was driving too fast. The police, Fire Department and Paramedics all came to visit him and told him none of them thought he would make it and to make sure his second chance at life was well spent. He is in Nursing School to give back.
Here is her FB post about the accident and the miracle she witnessed. I cut a little out since it was so long. You can go to the link at the bottom to see all of it.
“Three seconds. That’s how long we had from the moment we drifted off the road until the truck hit the pilar at 85mph. In three seconds Hunter had to handle a situation that would either kill us immediately or save our lives…, And when we were both lying in our beds in the ER he found a way to come protect my heart and give me a hug.
I’m overwhelmed at how little damage was done to Hunter and I in a wreck that should have chopped our bodies in half. I’m in awe of the presence of God in this entire situation. Every part of this experience we went through points directly to Him. The way God helped Hunter to respond exactly the way he did behind the wheel, spinning the truck exactly where it should have to be able to smash into the pillar directly in the middle of me and Hunter so we were both untouched…, that doesn’t just happen. God doesn’t throw protection around like that for no reason. He does it because he’s not finished with us.
…, Looking to the drivers seat all I saw was his head through the windshield, a face full of blood, and a body that wasn’t moving. I looked straight out the truck and there was a man..bright with a big white beard. No other cars in sight…just this man. He was my guardian angel. He saw me and immediately told me that an ambulance was coming…, I don’t know if it was a hallucination or me unconsciously dreaming or a glimpse of heaven…but all I knew in that moment was that Hunter was safe with me…, I asked this man when the ambulance was coming. He told me in just a second. He walked away, I blinked and a flashlight was in my face. The paramedics were there helping me and Hunter.
Here is the miracle part: no broken bones, concussions that lasted not even 24 hours, no internal damage, and just a few stitches in my knee and hunters face…, All of our belongings in perfect condition,… and the only thing left behind at the crash scene is Hunters bible open, with a page marked with scripture telling us to not be afraid; Jesus is with us.
I am amazed. Absolutely taken away by the presence of God. So blessed for him sending me an angel…, So thankful for all the thoughts and prayers that were sent our way. The power of prayer is real, and it healed me and Hunter.
But tonight I’m praying for all of you…, I want everyone to to know the love and the power of God. He has a purpose…and it’s so clear that NOTHING…not even a car accident like this one will cause his plans for you to change…, And the plans he has for YOU and your life aren’t going anywhere…, Embrace the struggles and the joys of this life! Without a doubt it’s a miracle we’re alive, but more than that it’s simply Gods plan for us. We’re so grateful for this wreck and all it will do in our lives. We are blessed to be okay. And so in love with the amazing God we serve.”
Leave behind the fear
Women who run with wolves have discovered something about themselves that allows them to leave behind the fear that is expressed because of going outside the comfort zone. This fear is Finding-Excuses-And-Reasons. Why do we experience this type of fear? It comes from a lack of self love, self trust and self care. For women who run with wolves, we have discovered S.E.L.F. which stands for Sacred-Empowered-Liberated-Fearless. She sees herself as a Sacred being She sees herself as an Empowered being She sees herself as a Liberated being She sees herself as a Fearless being. She runs with a vast community of souls, who hold and support her. She knows as a sacred being she is never, ever, truly alone. She is honored as a wisdom keeper, an empowered being that has grounded herself into the earth. Her roots run deep into the earth and support the work she does in the world. She knows that she is a liberated woman who came to this earth to free those who have become shackled to the stories of not being good enough, pretty enough, or worthwhile. Her purpose is to remind others of their own sacred agreements they came here to fulfill. Of the love we have for each other. To free them from their self made chains and fulfill their own purpose in being here. She is fearless because for her, the word fear is a word of high integrity because for her it means Face-Everything-And-Rejoice. She knows that she can be grateful for each fear that is faced down and transformed into something wonderful. She is rejoicing because she is working with others out in the world to build a bridge to shift our world from the challenges we see happening today, into a place of unity, love and trust. If you can change your definition of the word fear, you can change your world. To fearless women, I am honored to be your sister. Below is a copy of my poem which expresses these thoughts. The wolf howls at the moon, not out of loneliness, As he knows he is one with the universe. He howls out of gratitude to be a member of the pack. He remembers those he has traveled with in past lives, He sees those he is traveling with again. He rejoices in his vast community of souls, knowing that he is truly never alone. The great spirit has honored the wolf with a voice that sings out in the darkness. He honors the great spirit by singing to us, “Do not be afraid, for you are not alone” “I am here, and I remember you even if you have forgotten”. Like the wolf I sing out to you, through my words on a page I say, “I remember you, for we have traveled together before.” I honor you that you have come again to do the great work before us. Call out together with me as we gather our relatives that have forgotten their purpose. Call to their minds our scared agreement to meet at this time and place. Whisper to them of the great love we have for each other and their hearts will remember. Gather around as we build the bridge of knowledge and understanding. This bridge will unite all peoples together in love This bridge is shifting our world into a new age of unity, love and trust. We are one, One love, I love us One trust, I trust us, I honor our sacred agreements, I am here.