Category Archives for Journey

Embrace Life, Each Day Is A Gift

_Old age is like climbing a mountain. You climb from ledge to ledge. The higher you get, the more

Shel Silverstein is one of my favorite poets.  My kids all read his poems when they were little.  This is one of his poems that I wanted to share, because it is now part of my life with my dad.

The Little Boy and Old Man

“Said the little boy, Sometimes I drop my spoon.  Said the little old man, I do that too.

The little boy whispered, I wet my pants.  I do too, laughed the old man.

Said the little boy, I often cry.  The old man nodded, So do I.

But worst of all, said the boy, it seems Grown-ups don’t pay attention to me.  And he felt the warmth of a wrinkled old hand.  I know what you mean, said the little old man.”

Recently I crossed over from being a daughter to being a parent for my father.  Some changes in your life, tear your heart into tiny pieces.  22 years ago, my mom went on to her next adventure.  She passed away at 56 yrs old from cancer.  I stayed with her and took care of her the last three months of her life.  My aunt and my mom’s best friend stayed with me as she needed around the clock care.  With them by my side, while I had hard moments, it wasn’t traumatic.  I miss her so much with each new family event.  My kids graduating high school.  college, marriages, and of course grandchildren and now great grandchildren. She missed it all.

It was a family understanding that when my dad retired from work that he would move in with us.  And because he had poor heart health, having a triple bypass, he actually retired a little early with disability and came to live with us.  At first he had a motorhome that he lived in, so he could keep his independence.  We had a motorhome pad, with electricity hook ups and everything.  Then came the day he had to move inside, because his health was deteriorating. 

Then we purchased a hospital bed because he was having problems breathing at night, with a lot of coughing and this would allow him to raise it up enough that he could comfortably sleep.  Then more ups and downs.  He acquired a walker because he couldn’t walk more than a few steps before he was out of breath.  Then back and forth to hospitals, ER’s, tests and more tests. Changes of medication when they damaged his kidneys.  Changes of medications to help his heart failures.

My dad has a phobia around hospitals.  An intense fear.  He refuses to go, wanting to stabilize himself with drugs at home.  So that is very trying as it usually means intense discussions with both me and his cardiac specialists.  The drugs have started causing kidney damage and they have to dial back the dosage.  I feel horrible that he becomes defeated.  He sits in his chair and watches TV all day and I know he has feelings of depression and being defeated by his body.  Sometimes I feel like the worst daughter in the world, as I crossed over into being his parent.  I am his advocate when he doesn’t or just can’t understand what is happening and why.

There is a moral task of caregiving, and that involves just being there, being with that person and being committed.  When there is nothing that can be done, we have to be able to say, “Look, I’m with your in this experience.  Right through to the end of it.

Dr. Arthur Kleinman.

Why do I do this?  About 52 years ago, my dad married my mom.  She had six little girls, all eighteen months apart with a set of twins.  My dad has a lot of faults, like all of us.  But he also has some amazing qualities.  One is that when they got married, we were his daughters.  Not his step-daughters.  His daughters.  Not once in 50 years has the word “step” exited his mouth.  I think that many who read this will not understand how important that is to a child.  For me, putting the word “step” before me, makes me less than his own child.  I know how lucky we were that we were never step children.  When my mom died, 22 years ago, we were still his daughters.  No words can express this kind of love.  Believe me, if you met some of my sisters, you would understand how amazing it is, that he still calls them his daughters – lol. 

Of all the lessons I’ve learned through my years of caregiving, the most important is to keep the love connection going.  Just tell them that you love them again and again and again.  You will never say it too much, ever.

Joan Lunden

It is scary to cross this transition from daughter to parent.  It was different from my mom, as I never felt I became her parent, I remained in caregiving mode.  It is scary to see that in the near future, he will go on to his next great adventure, leaving all of us behind him.  We are both scared right now.  What happens when we let our fears get ahold of our mouths?  We shout, we get angry, we say hurtful things.  But it is just us being scared.  Caregiving is hard, but it is also so rewarding.  I can remember when I was taking care of my mom, that some of my sisters were absent because it was too hard to watch the lung cancer take away her ability to care for herself.  I learned what the true meaning of words like grace, dignity, love, sacrifice really were deep under the surface of the meanings we usually give them.  I am again reminded of it now everyday.

To care for those who once cared for us is one of the highest honors. 

Tia Walker

I wanted to share my story because I know that many of you are doing the same as I am.  Day by day watching a loved one fade away.  Sometimes with a fight and sometimes with a whimper.  It is hard to watch, and harder to experience it happening to oneself.  I wanted to say how while all of our experiences are different because of the people involved and other circumstances, I know how hard this is.  I know how fulfilling it is one moment and utterly draining the next.  But this is still a gift.  A gift of grace, love, and all the other virtues. 

Caregiving often calls us to lean into love we didn’t know was even possible.

  Tia Walker

You are not alone, even when it feels like it.  If you feel overwhelmed, please join a caregiver group, whether online or up front and personal.  It helps to share what is going on and they can help you with getting assistance when it is needed.  Believe me, it is hard to find help when you don’t even know where to start and what is available.  Even the strongest person can have the weakest day of their life and having access to someone who knows and understands what is happening is priceless.

Remember the power of your angels.  Remember to be guided by love and take strength in the good memories, when those you care for are having a bad day and giving you waking nightmares.  And remember the grace of how those things we can’t change, can change us.

When we are in a state of severe loss, of pain and grief and a darkness of the soul – that is when life is at its hardest to bear.

But if we just take a deep breath, followed by more deep breaths we can walk into the middle of the chaos. It’s messy in the middle, but in the middle we have the space to start working through the story of our loss. And as we walk through the story, we eventually reach the end.

The end is the place of new beginnings. Our life has been forever changed by our tragedy. We must remember in this space of pain, grief, and loss that the new beginning will be waiting for us.

The sun will shine. The stars will shine brightly. New people will come into our lives. We can see the light at the end of the tunnel, if we only will open once again to breathe in the love.

Heart’s Destiny

 

_The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched.

It doesn’t interest me what you do for a living.  I want to know what you ache for, and if you dream of meeting your heart’s destiny.

  – Oriah Mountain Dreamer

Orian Mountain Dreamer is one of my favorite writers.  I invite you to read her books, they are small but mighty.  The Invitation is what this quote is from.  The poem is a wonderful deep dive into important questions that probe who we are and why.

If light is in your heart, you will find your way home.

  – Rumi

Our words have power.  When we hide how we feel, what we think, we are trying to live our life using someone else’s light.  We can’t find our way home that way.  There is always some truth behind the words that are followed by “just kidding”.  When we say “I don’t know”, there is always some knowledge that we judge as being incomplete and so we say we don’t know – when in fact we do know something about it.  When we say, “I don’t care” we are not being truthful.  We think if we put out emotions in a cage and don’t let them out we can’t be hurt.  The reality is that we are hurting ourselves.  When we tell others that we are “ok” when we aren’t, we rob them of the opportunity to help us.  

May you always be guided by the light that shines forth from within you.

  – solitaryview

Life is always about the meaning that we give to it.  If you take a lamp as the analogy, our soul is the light inside the lamp.  The things that happen to us are the glass that surrounds the light.  That glass doesn’t matter, it is the heart and soul – the light that matters.

We tell ourselves stories about the events in our life, to give us some meaning to what is happening. Some of us are writing horror stories, or stories that leave us drained from fears and worries. Others of us, write stories about the gifts we received as we travel through life.  From the wonderful things that happen to us, as well as the tragic things. The best way to count your blessings is to look at life through a variety of lenses. To bring things into and out of focus. To look into the depths of our souls to see what the storms dredged up for us to look at.  When we sift through it all, we can let go of everything that doesn’t serve us, realize the lessons we have been taught, and grow into who we came here to be.

Harness the power of today!  Seize the blessings of today!  Make something happen, enhance your life, make someone laugh, help a friend.  Love, love, love.

  – Dr. Steve Maraboli. 

There is a big difference between making something happen and forcing something to happen.  Forcing something to happen isn’t natural.  It is like forcing yourself into something that doesn’t fit.  Have you ever laid on the bed to force your stomach to be flat so you can get your jeans buttoned and zipped up?  Or forced your foot into a shoe that you loved, but doesn’t really fit?  You might be able to get the jeans fastened, but it hurts your stomach when you try to sit.  You might be able to walk in those shoes for a little while, but eventually you have to take off the shoes because they hurt your feet so badly.  What you will left with is blisters to prove vanity isn’t a good idea to live your life by.

And I know how broken you are, how heavy you feel, but still, you have to find the light in you.  You have to hold on to it with care and never let it go, even if it drags you to the end of the world.

  – r.m. drake

But making something happen is all about taking small steps to bring into reality what you are dreaming of.  It is catching the light of your soul and holding it up into the darkness, so that you can see where to go.  It is taking the voice or dancing lessons because you want to be in theater.  It is taking leaps of faith when you don’t know how to do something.  It is going for the brass ring as the merry go round flies around and around.  It is learning a foreign language for a trip of a lifetime to a foreign land.  It is taking big, medium and small actions, not just dreaming about it,  You don’t just sit there doing nothing to make it happen. 

Whenever you hear or read anything of a spiritual nature that moves your soul you are not learning something . . , you are remembering what you have always known.  It is a gentle awakening.

  – thewellnessglow.net

Have you ever went somewhere new and experienced deja vu?  That feeling that what is happening at this moment, has happened before?  Have you ever learned something new and it was just so natural and easy that you didn’t even need instructions to do it?  For me, it feels like something that I have dreamed about, is now happening in real life.  That my mind already knows and sees the connections, like it was programmed into being.  I think that when this happens, we need to pay attention.  That we are in that moment doing something that is important, even if our minds do not understand it.

The Words I Speak Are All In Languages I Do Not Speak

And yet, when you get here, you are not given instructions.  There are no diagrams about how you are meant to live each day or directions on how to assemble some semblance of happiness.  You are not even told what colors to paint your feelings or given a purpose and a reason for your life.  You have to make all of it up.  You have to make all of it up yourself.

  – Iain S. Thomas, from “I Wrote This For You”

No matter if we are in the first month or the last  month of the year, take the time to reflect on what the year so far has been for you.  To see the places where life has been a blessing.  To see the places where you let your dreams fall by the wayside.  Pick them back up.  Dust them off.  Find within them the things that you are looking for.  Go beyond your means to make them come true for you.  Draw down deep within the story of them and bring it into reality.  Transform the pain and regrets of this year and past years into the blessings and joy of a new year.

Years end is neither an end nor a new beginning, but a going on, with all the wisdom that experience can instill in us. 

  – Hal Borland. 

The journey of life teaches us that growth happens when the dream is bigger and brighter than you ever thought it could be.  In the pursuit of that dream, it will illuminate your heart, capture your mind, and free your soul from the small box that you held it in.  You will discover that there are hidden maps within your soul.  That there are clues and invitations to walk through doors that will open your mind up to things you never dreamed could be true.  But you can only make those kind of discoveries when you listen to your heart. 

That is my wish for all of you today.  That you listen to your heart; that you hear the whisper of your soul and find the dream that is so big, that you too can grow beyond who you are today and enrich the universe.


A Courageous Conversation?

Are you brave enough to speak out loud the conversations that you have inside of yourself late at night when you are all alone?
  • How do we have a courageous conversation about the tragedy’s we have faced in our lives?  Some things just seem too devastating to turn from a negative to a positive experience.
  • How can we be honest with ourselves and others, around such things as overcoming addictions or similar problems?
  • What if we are trying to make positive changes in our lives, and we have “no one” in our lives to support us in making a life changing transformation?

Click below to get updates!

Or click here to learn more about the event>>

Go Where There Is No Path, And Leave A Trail

 

Over every mountain there is a path, although it may not be seen from the valley.

Theodore Roethke

Everything you see in your life at this moment, is the result of choices you have made.  The door in the photo is clearly open, but you can’t really see the steps through it or what lies beyond it.  Some of the choices we have made in life, lead us in directions that we didn’t even know where there. 

Sometimes behind the waterfall, there is a path into a valley that no one has discovered. 

Sometimes we fall through a hole in the ground, and discover a buried city. 

Sometimes we have a flat tire on a desert road, with no spare tire to change it – and we find a dusty path that leads to a hidden cache of gold. 

There is always a choice of following a paved road with lots of signs, or walking down a dirt path.  To stay safe on the paved road or taking on the risk of the unknown dirt path, and seeing for yourself the genius of the universal design for your life. 

Of never trying to see what is behind the waterfall in the first place (it is dangerous and you might fall down and hurt yourself); to climb out of that hole you fell into (it’s probably full of spiders, snakes, and rats) and ignoring the possibilities of discovery all around you; to stay beside that car on the hot desert road and wait for someone to rescue you (so much more sensible than striking out on your own).

Some beautiful paths can’t be discovered without getting lost.

Erol Ozan

So stop being so worried about the million and one things that can go wrong.  Start instead dreaming about, and getting excited about, what is around the next corner.  Whatever we chose to be the next destination, we should always aim just a little higher.  If we are aiming for the lower mountain, we won’t know if we could have climbed the higher one instead.  Don’t put off the higher mountain as your goal, thinking that you need to be realistic, that you need to go in small definable steps.  As the saying goes, “Shoot for the moon.  Even if you miss, you’ll land on the stars”.   Don’t be afraid to get lost.  Even landing among the stars, changes you, your world, and maybe even the whole world.

 

No one saves us but ourselves.  No one can and no one may.  We ourselves must walk the path.

Buddha

Friends, loved ones, mentors, teachers – they can all set us on what they think is the right path for us.  Sometimes they are right, sometimes they are wrong, and sometimes they are “almost” right.  It is up to us to decided what the correct life path is for us, at this point in our lives.  No matter what path we take in life, no matter where we go or end up, we take a little bit of everyone we know with us.  Haven’t you heard those voices in your head?  Your parents, you favorite aunt or uncle, your grandparents, those special friends from school – those voices that make insane comments about what is taking place in front of you?  Mine are these comedian’s talking commentary during a boring office meeting.  My son Sam’s voice comes into play during movies when they are doing anything military, telling me they are doing it wrong.

If you don’t like the road you’re walking, start paving another one.

Dolly Parton

I believe that we have at least three careers in our life, and that they can be completely different.  We shouldn’t confuse the path we are walking with the destination that we are going to.  Once I have mastered something, I get bored.  When I get bored, I know it is time to start exploring something new to learn, to have a new destination.  I am still walking my life path, the path of learning more about the world, about me, and what new sights are on the horizon.  There are times that the path can be a little blurry, because I haven’t yet discovered where the path is taking me.  So I keep walking and I get curious.  I know that when the path gets crystal clear, I have a new destination and new life experiences coming into focus.  

You drown not by falling into a river, but by staying submerged in it.

Paulo Coelho

This doesn’t mean that I am just sitting on the path waiting for it to define itself.  When I sit, it is like stepping off the deep end of the river and just sinking to the bottom.  If I sit, the world tries to define me.  To make me fit someone else’s mold, to do the things that they want me to do and be.  Then I lose myself, sitting submerged and wondering why I can’t breathe.  I have to take the time, the effort and the work to define the path, so that each step brings the focus sharper and more defined.  I have to swim back up to the surface of the river and determine which shoreline I want to step onto.

If you could have seen the end from the beginning, would you have chosen a different path?

-M 2013

Sometimes when we are walking down the path we have chosen everything goes wrong.  A forest fire races through the valley and destroys all of the vegetation.  The river overflows its banks and takes out the bridge we were walking across.  A 40 car pile-up in the fog totals our car.  Sometimes what seems like a life ending event, is actually the first step on a new path.  We had developed expectations of where the path should be taking us, and so we were actually sleep walking down the side path.  Because of our expectations, that path might have led us to the correct destination, but without the right experiences.  Have you ever seen someone famous implode right after they achieved critical acclaim for their talents?  Hollywood, Politics, Musicians – we’ve all seen them reach a pinnacle of success, then drugs, alcohol, sexual exploitation – and down they tumble into scandal. 

Not until we are lost do we begin to find ourselves.

Henry David Thoreau

This is due to not having strong enough roots to support their growth.  Somewhere along the path to finding themselves, they didn’t get lost.  They missed valuable life experiences that would have grounded their roots.  That would have forced them to grow deeper and discover more about who they were.  Because they didn’t have these valuable experiences, they allowed others even with the best intentions, to rescue them from falling on their face.  They covered things up. They didn’t let them experience the results of bad choices when they were small failures.  So they just kept being rescued and didn’t learn the life skills of what failure really means.

Remember when life’s path is steep, to keep your mind even.

Horace

What we  discover from failure is that sometimes it is the best thing that ever happened to us.  We see new ways to do something, which we would have never seen if everything went according to plan.  We discover wonderful character traits that were only exposed because we felt we had no other choice than to force ourselves to up our game.  My favorite movie scene is from “Facing The Giants” in the death crawl scene.  The player goes all of the way down the entire length of the football field, thinking that he is only trying to make it to the 50 yard line.  He couldn’t see where he was, and he was crawling with another player on his back.  At first the coach is only trying to get him to the 50 yard line, then he realizes the player has more in him than either of them knew.  We are all like that player, capable of so much more.  It is the difficult parts of life that open up the possibilities of our tasting some of that greatness we have buried deep inside.  So remember “to keep the mind even” – not letting doubts or over-confidence tilt us.

The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.

W.B. Yeats

Each day is a new adventure in walking our chosen life path.  Each day we can walk it in wonder, looking to see what is going to cross our path today.  We can be curious.  We can slow down and actually see what is on our right side, our left side, and directly in front of us.  Don’t miss the flowers that you’ve never seen in that color or shape before.  Look for the squirrels, bunnies, little lizards laying on the warm rock and enjoying the heat of the day.  Rest when you are tired.  Walk in the moonlight or lay back and count the stars. 

I suspect the truth is that we are waiting, all of us, against insurmountable odds for something extraordinary to happen to us.

Khaled Hosseini

This is your life path, your journey.  The world is full of friends, lovers,  and new brothers and sisters waiting to get to know us.  The destinations are fun to get to, to master some aspect of your life.  But really, life is lived on the path, during the step by step walking, dancing, singing, along the road to the newest destination.  So don’t forget to enjoy it.  The journey is – Your Happiness.


A Courageous Conversation?

Are you brave enough to speak out loud the conversations that you have inside of yourself late at night when you are all alone?
  • How do we have a courageous conversation about the tragedy’s we have faced in our lives?  Some things just seem too devastating to turn from a negative to a positive experience.
  • How can we be honest with ourselves and others, around such things as overcoming addictions or similar problems?
  • What if we are trying to make positive changes in our lives, and we have “no one” in our lives to support us in making a life changing transformation?

Click below to get updates!

Or click here to learn more about the event>>

Serenity Is Peace Amid Life’s Storms

 

_I must be a mermaid, I have no fear of depths and a great fear of shallow living._ Anais Nin

Updated 8/09/2018
When you look across the ocean with the sunrise or the sunset, you see their colors mirrored on the surface. This is like our appearance, beautiful when calm and serene. But if you dive down deep, into the depths, that is where the true beauty of a person lies, in their soul. This is the beauty that we miss, when we make surface judgments about someone.

Your heart is the size of an ocea
n. Go find yourself in its hidden depths.
  – Rumi
 
Self knowledge is the place to start. We need to dig down deep within us, and question all of the stories we have told ourselves about our life. What do we know to be 100% totally true? 

If we seriously ask and listen to the answer to this question, most of us would have to acknowledge that most of our stories about life are made up. We make them up to make sense of the things we have seen, done, and experienced.  We think we know ourselves and know others, but we really don’t.
 
The more I see, the less I know for sure.
  – John Lennon
 
This is because the more that we learn about life, the more we see that most of our knowledge is surface knowledge. The deeper we dive, the more we see how much more complicated and interconnected our understanding of life is.

Knowledge is knowing the depths of the ocean. Wisdom is knowing where to swim.
  – Saleem Sharma
 
Sometimes life can be hard to navigate. When the storms come in, the waves churn up from the bottom of the sea bed. Things come to the surface that have been long buried. We are like this when the storms of life blow in. All those things that we stuff down inside of us, because we either can’t, or don’t know how to deal with them, come churning up to the surface.
 
Shallow people dwell on the surface of false perceptions.  And they will always see something sinister in you, regardless of the truth your heart contains.
  – Jonny Oh
 
I think that shallow people see something sinister, because of the truth that you bring up from the depths.  They prefer to live on the surface, because they are afraid of what their own depths contain.  Drug and alcohol addiction sometimes starts from that place of wanting to hide from the truth.  To not feel anything.  So some people need to make you wrong in some way, for dredging up from the depths the things that you want to change in your life.  If they can convince you that the shallows are the place to live, then it makes them feel good that they are continuing to live there, and not face the truth of who they are. 
 
They muddy the water, to make it seem deep.
  – Friedrich Nietzsche 
 
Instead of being afraid of what we have buried, we need to rise up and calm the waters. Be still. Breathe. Be at peace. Realize that God never brings anything into our lives that we can’t handle. Wake up to your dreams. Live them out in your reality.  We need to release those who refuse to dive deep into their lives, and want to remain in the shallows.  Let them stay where they wish, as we seek out those who believe against all odds and evidence, that there is more to life than shallow living.
 
“The Hidden Clocks” by Iain S. Thomas
Don’t Stop Searching.
There is no comfort in giving up.
There are large parts of you that don’t exist yet.
The greatest you you could be, is still waiting to be found.
Get up and look.

Lean on the divine, and on those who love us. Change what can be changed, release the rest. See the hope of a new day, the beauty that lies within each of us, and the love that never dies. Remember that you can do anything you “think” you can do, and impossible really means “I m possible”.


A Courageous Conversation?

Are you brave enough to speak out loud the conversations that you have inside of yourself late at night when you are all alone?
  • How do we have a courageous conversation about the tragedy’s we have faced in our lives?  Some things just seem too devastating to turn from a negative to a positive experience.
  • How can we be honest with ourselves and others, around such things as overcoming addictions or similar problems?
  • What if we are trying to make positive changes in our lives, and we have “no one” in our lives to support us in making a life changing transformation?

Click below to get updates!

Or click here to learn more about the event>>

Awaken To Your True Self And Take Flight

If you want to awaken all of humanity, then awaken all of yourself. If you want to eliminate the su

Everyone has the perfect gift to give the world – and if each us is freed up to give the gift that is uniquely ours ro give, the world will be in total harmony 

  – Buckminster Fuller

The journey we are all on, individually, has interesting intersections.  Places where we have almost identical experiences.  Places where we are on the same page at the same time.  Wherever we are traveling on the map, someone has been there before us, and someone is just behind us.  We are driven by a hunger to express who we really are, and at the same time, we are like, “wait, wait, I’m not ready”.  Our choices reflect our greatest dreams and our deepest fears and insecurities.

Do you know what you are?  You are a manuscript of a divine letter. You are a mirror reflecting a noble face.  This universe is not outside of you. Look inside yourself, everything that you want, you already have.

  – Rumi

Do you remember when you went to a playground or maybe it was at school recess – the first time that you climbed up the ladder of the slide and looked way down to the bottom?  It seemed so far below us and really scary.  Maybe you went right back down that ladder too scared to go down the slide.  Or maybe you went down the slide, but remained in total control by gripping the sides of the slide so that you just eased yourself down to the bottom very, very slowly.  Or maybe you threw caution to the winds and went down the slide screaming at the top of your lungs, and ran as fast as you could to climb back up the ladder and this time to try it backwards.

We as human beings have this amazing capacity to be reborn at breakfast every day and say, “This is a new day.  Who will I be?”

  – Jack Kornfield

How many things in your life have been like that slide experience?  How has this pattern showed up in your life?  Do you blunt your own truth?  Do you not fully commit to anything in life?  Do you like to stay in the lines, and play safe with life by staying within your comfort zone?  Do you avoid pushing boundaries at home, at work, when exercising, in every area of your life?  Are you setting goals or New Years Resolutions that are not really growing you or breaking out or through anything that you did last year, or the year before that . . . , all the way back 5, 10, or 20 years ago?  Is RISK a dirty four letter word to your brain?

Whenever you  hear or read anything of a spiritual nature that moves you or touches your soul you are not learning something  . . , you are remembering what you have always known.  It is a gentle awakening.

 – thewellnessnow.net

When you move forward, is it from consulting your own inner guidance, or from following the advice of others?  You awaken and become conscious of your purpose in life when you stop looking outside for the answers that can only be found inside of us.  Sit in silence and listen to the soft voice of your heart.  To the guidance of your soul.  This divine guidance comes to us through the voice of intuition.  When we start to live our life from this authentic place, our soul becomes visible.

The more you trust intuition, the more empowered you become, the stronger you become, and the happier you become.

  – Gisele Bundchen

Do you move forward without design with “a leap of faith”, like racing down that slide in childhood.  Or do you continue to walk down well worn and well known paths based on your need to control everything in your life? Like gripping the sides of that slide to control your slide to the bottom.  Do you get vulnerable and put yourself out there, or do you draw back into your quiet safe corner where you can’t be seen or heard?  We mistakenly think that when we keep safe, that we are avoiding being hurt.  The truth is when we are not taking that leap of faith, we are suffering a far greater pain.  We suffer in life, from not living our purpose.  We suffer the regrets of not living a fully lived life. That leap of faith is the road to the happiness.  The road to living a life well lived.  Of stepping up into transforming not only ourselves, but the world we live in. 

Vulnerability is not about fear and grief and disappointment – it is the birthplace of everything we’re hungry for.

– Brene Brown

Think of people who became “obsessed” with something – Jane Goodell, Mother Teresa. Gandhi, Martin Luther King, all come to my mind.  All people that when you hear their name, you think of the “thing” or purpose that gave meaning to their life.  Their message comes through loud and clear.  You associate their name with the message. It isn’t only their life that was changed by their following their passion.  Their life purpose actually changed the world.  They have literally become a living archetype, a soul on fire. 

In a world where everyone wears a mask, it’s a privilege to see a soul.

  – Unknown

Watching a candle flame is watching the transformation of fire.  It dies down and flames up over and over again.  It is constantly changing – it changes directions, it changes height, it changes width – in any one second it is not the same as it was the previous second.  It reacts to the slightest breeze in the room. 

There is a force within which gives you life, seek that.  In your body lies a priceless gem, seek that.  O wandering soul if you want to find the greatest treasure, don’t look outside, look inside, and seek that.

  – Rumi

When we awaken, there is a fire that starts burning within our soul.  We awaken to our true nature, as everything that doesn’t belong gets burned away.  We start to get glimpses of what our truth is.  We see the masks of conditioned behaviors and patterns that need to be removed, as they don’t serve us.  Like a mirror we see reflected back to us what is holding us back. We see that the walls that our patterns built to protect us, are in fact keeping us from living to our full potential.  When we see life from our souls perspective, we see that there are no obstacles, only guidance.

Don’t let life’s challenges harden your heart, let them empower your mind, renew your spirit and strengthen your soul.

  – Babz


A Courageous Conversation?

Are you brave enough to speak out loud the conversations that you have inside of yourself late at night when you are all alone?
  • How do we have a courageous conversation about the tragedy’s we have faced in our lives?  Some things just seem too devastating to turn from a negative to a positive experience.
  • How can we be honest with ourselves and others, around such things as overcoming addictions or similar problems?
  • What if we are trying to make positive changes in our lives, and we have “no one” in our lives to support us in making a life changing transformation?

Click below to get updates!

Or click here to learn more about the event>>

The Gift Of Self Transformation

How does one become a butterfly_ You must be willing to give up being a caterpillar, and transform i

Updated 2/10/2018

Transformation gives you the chance to rewrite the story of who you are and who you are capable of being. There are many things in our life that we give negative meanings to. But what if you gave pain the definition that it shows you that which is not right for you? This would be a positive thing to know – what doesn’t belong to me or my life. It is hard to leave something or someone behind you, to let them or it go.  It is hard until you decide to do it.  Then it becomes easy.  It isn’t the leaving that is hard, it is the decision.

Envy is another word that has a bad rap. What if envy simply shows you things which you may wish to empower in your own life? That would be a great thing to know – things I want in my life and can empower myself to obtain.  In our lives we have the habit of settling.  We settle with that 10 lbs of weight that we can’t seem to lose.  We settle with our job, thinking what we have is better than nothing.  We settle, settle, settle, because the reality is that we don’t know what we really, really want.

I am always stuck.  I am always stuck between giving people everything because I am dying to create meaningful relationships, and giving them nothing at all because then if they leave, at least I’ll be left whole.

  – (via yoymenoyhoy)

Transformation comes when we are totally honest with ourselves.  It comes when we face the things that we don’t want to face. It comes from taking responsibility for all our actions and inactions. It comes when life forces us to look at what we are doing, when our WHY we need to change becomes an imperative.  There is a game that we can play where we write down a series of things that we want in our life (write down as least 25, and try for more).  Then we pick two and ask, which one is more soul catching?  The one we don’t pick is scratched off.  Then we take the next two and so on until we just have the ones left that we picked.  Then we do the same thing to that list, and we continue with this process until we only have three left. 
 
It is not what you say out of your mouth that determines your life, it’s what you whisper to yourself that has the most power.
  – Robert T Kiyosaki
 
Those three things are what pulls most on our hearts and souls.  Now comes the transformation part.  Who do we need to become, to draw those things into our life?  What fears do we need to face down?  What action steps do we need to take?  Who do we know that can help us?
 
The greatest gift that we can ever give ourselves is self transformation.  We all have scars both interior and exterior.  Like road maps they tell a story of the journey that we have been on.  The scars from being uprooted, of moving away from friends and family when you were a child.  The scars of being bullied, both by others and by our mean selves.  The scars of falling down.  The pain of getting back on our feet. 
 
Some of these scars are healed, and they are barely visible.  They tell a story that we have transformed from a scary movie or nightmare of desolation, into a comedy in which we star.  We can touch those scars, remember and still smile.  But others still need to be healed, to be transformed.  When we touch them, it is like touching a hot stove.  The pain is barely tolerable.  Even though that scar looks healed from the outside, inside the pain still lingers. 
 
That is where self transformation is the gift.  We can go into the chrysalis and heal.  We need to look at the space of where we are honestly.  Then look at the space of what it is we want in our life.  Then instead of becoming lost in the space of longing, we transform it into the space of an inspiring journey.  The bridge is built by our being willing to give up the pain, to let it go.  To transform it into something beautiful.  To gift it with wings of color, patterns of joyous beauty.  To let it take flight and leave us.
 
One of the most courageous decisions you’ll ever make is to finally let go of what is hurting your heart and soul.
  – Brigitte Nicole
 
 
The being that is forming in a chrysalis is no longer a caterpillar. For the Butterfly the past is truly a place of reference. It can no longer live there, because that body is gone. Within the chrysalis the caterpillars body literally melted into goo, and then formed a totally new body. As the butterfly’s body grows into its new shape, it becomes cramped as the wings want to expand out. It isn’t a place of residence for the butterfly, so it has to break loose and spread it’s wings and find a new home.
 
I tell you this to break your heart, by which I mean only that it break open and never close again to the rest of the world.
  – Mary Oliver
 
The butterfly had to break out of the old place of residence and begin a brand new journey, where everything is experienced for the first time. It must break open its heart to begin this journey, because it has to trust its intuition for flying, for finding food, for making a new home. Literally everything for the butterfly is a brand new experience. 
 
…, something very beautiful happens to people when their world has fallen apart – a humility, a nobility, a higher intelligence emerges at just the point when our knees hit the floor.
  – Marianne Williamson
 
Transformation is a scary business. Because I am a perfectionist, I hate doing something new for the first time. I am doing the best I can with my posts, knowing that I will have spelling errors or grammar mistakes in my writing. I can proofread this a dozen times and the minute I publish I find something I missed. Sometimes when I am reading an old post, I will find more than one missed error and it taunts me.  Can you hear it?  Neener, neener, neener, you can’t catch me?
 
I am living with being imperfect in order to just get the post out there.  If you are a grammar queen or king, and see something in these posts that is an error, please don’t just tell me how my writing drives you crazy when you see the errors.  Please tell me what it is that needs to be corrected.  I am just a lowly knave doing the best that I can.  I am open to correction.
 
You can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something — your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life.
  –  Steve Jobs
 
If we just do what we know, then we confine ourselves to remain the same.  It is striking out into the unknown, trying new things, doing things differently that allows us to be free to grow into who we are meant to be.
 
Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery.  But today is a gift.  That’s why we call it The Present.
  – A.A. Milne
 
 

A Courageous Conversation?

Are you brave enough to speak out loud the conversations that you have inside of yourself late at night when you are all alone?
  • How do we have a courageous conversation about the tragedy’s we have faced in our lives?  Some things just seem too devastating to turn from a negative to a positive experience.
  • How can we be honest with ourselves and others, around such things as overcoming addictions or similar problems?
  • What if we are trying to make positive changes in our lives, and we have “no one” in our lives to support us in making a life changing transformation?

Click below to get updates!

Or click here to learn more about the event>>

Every Great Dream Begins With A Dreamer

The World Needs More Dreamers and Doers. Above All, The World Needs Dreamers That Do.

In order to save myself, I must destroy first the me I was told to be.

  – The Dreamer

 We are all born dreamers.  All you have to do is watch any small child.  You can see their dreams, their imaginations running wild.  They create whole worlds with blankets and pillows, some Legos and Hot Wheels, Dinosaurs and some plastic green Army Men.  Whatever they can get their hands on.  If you give them a few tools they will cut and saw out some boards and hammer together a space ship, then put on their capes to go out to save the world from alien invaders.  But the horrible thing that happens to some of us, is that we let go of our dreams.  We become realists and make our possibilities into a small safe comfort zones. 

There are only two kinds of people in this world.  The realists and the dreamers.  The realists know where they are going and the dreamers have already been there.

  – Robert Orben

We need to destroy our comfort zones and remember that we are dreamers and we have unlimited potential.  Your dreams were designed to custom fit your personality.  If we let them, they will continue grow and expand as we do.  They will follow us all of our days, growing greater and grander as we do.  When Walt Disney was laying in the hospital dying, he had his newest dreams taped up on the ceiling so that he could look up at them and continue to plan their realities.  As long as you continue to learn, to grow and expand, so will your dreams.  Dreams are our future realities, waiting in the wings to come out on the stage of life.  

The dreamers of the day are dangerous people.  For they dream their dreams with wide open eyes, and make them come true.

  – D.H. Lawrence

I am always amazed when I read an old science fiction book or look at some of the drawings of someone like Leonardo Da Vinci.  He created on paper the bicycle, the helicopter, and an airplane.  What powerful dreamers they were.  At the time, they were writing about a future they could only see in their minds eye.  They made up inventions that had us deep within the oceans, that had us exploring the galaxy, that had us beaming a person from the land mass of a planet, up through space and into the interior of a space ship. 

Great dreams of great dreamers are always transcended.

  – A.P.J. Abdul Kalam

Over time, inventors have been catching those concepts or thoughts, and they have been bringing them into reality.  They invented deep sea diving suits, and submarines and special mini subs that could go even deeper.  We have the ability to see the ocean floor from satellites deep in space.  They took us to the moon and back.  Now we go back and forth on a regular basis to a space station.  I saw a news piece about how someone is building personal small helicopters that will fly themselves and be used in the near future to take us to work.  While this isn’t the flying car that turns into a brief case we saw on the George Jetson cartoons, it is getting closer to a reality.

All successful people, men and women, are big dreamers.  They imagine what their future could be, ideal in every respect, and then they work every day toward their distant vision.

  – Brian Tracy

When you are a dreamer that puts action steps into your dreams, you discover a number of things.  You discover what hard work really looks and feels like.  You discover the real cost of sacrificing everything to make the dream into reality, and you discover that the price isn’t as large as fear told you it would be.  You discover that every time you fall down, every time it doesn’t work out like you thought it would, that every single failure, is just a way to show you a new viewpoint into what you are bringing into the worlds reality. You discover that failures are just stepping stones to greatness.

Do not let the fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark in the hopeless swamps of the not-quite, the not-yet, and the not-at-all.  Do not let the hero in your soul perish in lonely frustration for the life you deserved and have never been able to reach.  The world you desire can be won.  It exists  . .   it is real . . .  it is possible . . . it’s yours.

  – Ayn Rand

Every night you tossed and turned trying to figure out the right way, and all of the struggles you have or will go through, are in the end are the price tag of the ever expanding new you.  Each and every price tag that you pay for .. . every single failure, is what is leading you to the mastery of the idea, and the fulfillment of the concept.  The steps of the completion of the dream, becomes a part of the never ending journey to which we all sign up for.  You gain a true understanding of the words, “it is not the destination that matters, but who we are becoming along the way”.

Yes, I am a dreamer.  For a dreamer is one who can find his way by moonlight, and his punishment is that he sees the dawn before the rest of the world.

  – Oscar Wilde

Dreamers Steer By The Stars, SO . . .

Follow your Dreams

Make a Wish

Dream Big

Take a Chance

Believe Big

Make a Change

Taste the Sky

Find the Fire Within

Follow Your Passion

Hold the Vision

Trust the Process

Don’t Be Afraid To Dance Your Own Dance Of Life

The JourneyBetween who you once wereand who you are becoming,Is where the Dance of Lifereally takes placeIn order to save myself, I must destroy first the me I was told to be.

  – The Dreamer

When you were this girls age, you had dreams about who you wanted to be when you grew up.  You may already have been singing, or dancing, or wanting to be a doctor or lawyer.  Between this age and actually growing up most of us have our dreams dashed in some way.  It may be that someone teases us that we can’t carry a tune, or we are doing the dance wrong.  Or maybe they tell us that we should choose a less challenging career than a doctor or lawyer, because we really aren’t that smart.  Or it could be more subtle where we are being directed by our parents into the career that they want for us.

Maybe the journey isn’t so much about becoming anything.  Maybe it’s about unbecoming everything that isn’t really you, so you can be who you were meant to be in the first place.

  – Unknown

Along the way we also learn to hide who we are.  We learn that others judge us, so we put on masks to conform to who they want us to dress like, look like, act like.  We hide our dreams so that no one can destroy them any further.  We learn not to trust our hearts to be in others hands.  We give up on what is possible and settle for what is conforming to the needs of others.  We forget who we are and what we are here for.  We no longer take part in the dance of life, but settle back against the wall and watch those with more courage or talent dance it in front of us.

Ten years from now, make sure you can say that you chose your life, you didn’t settle for it.

  – Unknown

There is only one way to truly know who you are deep down inside.  You have to get in touch with your own soul.  You need to be by yourself, and sit with yourself, and just listen.  Looking back at your life, find the places where you were really happy.  Find the things that are so easy for you to do, that others find hard or impossible.  Trace back all of the threads that have your name engraved upon them.  Start picking out and removing all of the threads that are not you.  Look for the gold and silver pieces and toss out the dross.  Now look for the patterns that are left.  The amazing thing is that it usually takes you back to this age.  The age when you acted out who you really were, before society broke you like a young colt and told you who to be.  The threads of genius that are all you, can now be taken up and made into whatever pattern you want.  It is never too late to be who you were meant to be.

To make the right choices in life, you have to get in touch with your soul.  To do this, you need to experience solitude, which most people are afraid of, because in the silence you hear the truth and know the solutions. 

  – Deepak Chopra

Sometimes when you make this journey deep into our soul, we discover that our lives have to be completely shaking up.  We are covered in dust and debris that needs to be removed.  We need to rearrange almost everything.  Change almost everything.  We need to go to the place we are supposed to be.  A close friend of mine relocated from Los Angels to Italy and she loves it.  The best thing to do is to remove what doesn’t belong and then figure out how to rearrange what does.  It is an individual journey that defines who we are in a totally new way.  We discover our truth by looking for it down deep within and then integrating it into our life.  We are on a life adventure.  This journey is for you alone.  Embrace it and life it fully.

The spiritual journey is individual, highly personal. It can’t be organized or regulated.  It isn’t true that everyone should follow one path.  Listen to your own truth.

  – Ram Dass

There are some that will say that living your life purpose, is being selfish.  That we are ignoring the wishes of others.  But actually the reverse is true.  Each one of us was given as part of our life journey a divine destiny.  We were born into the place and the family that would give us the tools to accomplish this purpose.  Some of those life lessons come through adversity, some come as part of the journey of rediscovering who we are really meant to be.  But if we don’t take the risks, make the changes and transform our lives, then our destiny will not be fulfilled.  And we will not be living the life that God sent us here to live.  So it is actually selfish to not live up to our full potential.  To not find out who we are supposed to be.  To not utilize our power to its full capability. To not live out loud and up front our God given destiny.

. . . it’s a life’s journey of finding ourselves, finding our power, and living for yourself, not for everyone else . . . 

  –  Mariska Hargitay

Don’t Worry, Be Happy

Life is about momentsdon't wait for them,create them

Happiness  is not something ready made.  It comes from your own actions

  – Dalai Lama

Most of us as adults would look at all the clean laundry on this bed and sigh, thinking that it all needed to be folded or hung up and put away.  But my two grandsons didn’t see a pile of work to do, they saw fun.  The smiles on their faces make my heart burst with joy.  Can you remember being this age and thinking that everything in and around your house was just waiting for you to figure out a way to have fun with it?  As adults we need to get back that lens of seeing things as something ready made to make us happy.

Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do, are in harmony

  – Mahatma Gandhi

One of the things that I love about watching small children, is their ability to just be themselves.  They aren’t hiding who they are behind a mask, no fake smiles, no hidden agenda’s.  If something does happen that makes them sad or mad, their emotions flow straight through them.  The don’t pout in the corner waiting for someone to coax them back into a good mood.  They have their moments when a tantrum hits them, then they immediately get distracted and two minutes later they are on the bed rolling in clean clothes and laughing about nothing. 

Laugh at yourself and at life.  Not in the spirit of derision or whining self pity, but as a remedy, a miracle drug, that will ease your pain, cure your depression, and help you to put in perspective that seemingly terrible defeat and worry, with laughter at your predicaments, thus freeing your mind to think clearly toward the solution that is certain to come.  Never take yourself too seriously,

  – Og Mandino

They don’t have baggage that they carry around with them, that slows down their emotions.  They don’t find themselves trapped in an endless loop of replaying a bad experience over and over again.  They don’t let their emotions send them into an endless spiral of judgment and negativity.  They don’t spend their days getting triggered by something unimportant. They don’t let a single thing cause them to spend the rest of the day in a bad mood.

The best thing that you can do to this world is to be joyous.  Being joyful, is the greatest offering you can make to the world

  – Jaggi Vasadev

Have you ever been in a terrific mood, driving down the freeway as you go to work?  Then someone cuts you off.  You might mutter under your breath.  Or maybe you yell at the driver shaking you head or hands.  Or maybe you drive right up on their bumper to let them know how angry you are.  A few weeks ago two drivers were going down the freeway, and I don’t know what started the argument, but they were taking turns cutting each other off, then they pulled their cars over and one man got out with a baseball bat.  Fortunately, there was a highway patrol behind them and he was able to stop it from escalating even further.  Why do we let someone else’s actions destroy our good mood?  Why do we feel the need to somehow get back at them for their either unthinking or aggressive driving habits?

Respect yourself enough to walk away from anything that no longer serves you, grows you, or makes you happy.

  – Unknown

It isn’t easy to let things go as fast as they happen to us.  But if we remember these two rascals and a load of clothes just out of the dryer, maybe, just maybe, we can be like children.  Feel the emotion, and let it flow out of us.  Take back our self respect and don’t allow anyone to push down the rabbit hole of negative emotions.  Just walk away.  Just because someone invites us to argue and fight, doesn’t mean we have to accept the invitation.  Self Awareness allows us the space to check in within us and choose happiness.  To chose not to worry.  To chose the “easy button” in all aspects of living our life in joy and happiness.

Life does not require you to sacrifice or compromise your joy to get what you want.  Joy is what you want, so when you choose in harmony with it, you are fulfilling your life purpose.

  – Alan Cohen

When we choose to live our life from the place of gratitude it helps us to shift our energy to bring in more of what we want in our life.  As we walk down our chosen path, the journey of life brings us many things.  Not all of them are meant to stay.  Everything in our life currently is serving some sort of purpose.  Part of the journey is figuring out why it is in our life.  What it is supposed to be teaching us, and once we know and implement that knowledge, then it is time to let it go.  What an interesting thing it is to recognize that in every moment we have choices laid before us.  We can choose anger and frustration, or we can let the negative emotion roll in a wave over us and past us to the shore and then watch as it takes all of the negativity back out to sea.

We either make ourselves miserable or we make ourselves strong.  The amount of work is the same.

  – Carol Castenada

Sometimes happiness is a feeling. Sometimes it’s a decision.  Don’t let stupid things break your happiness.  If you really look at life, while we all have tragedy happen in our life, most of our unhappiness from day to day is our being triggered by something stupid.  

If you want to, you could find a million reasons to hate life and be angry at the world, or, if you want, you could find a million reasons to love life and be happy.  Choose wisely.

  – Cari Welsh

I Am What I Choose To Become

I am on the hunt for the person that I've yet to become.Life tried to crush her, but instead she succeeded in creating a diamond%2

Today I am discovering who I am.  Today I am becoming my person, worthy of developing all of me.  Today I am beginning to know that I am okay the way I am.

  – Ruth Fishel

Discovering who we are requires that we go on a journey.  We can’t become who we are trying to become by remaining where we are, or what we are.  This journey begins with curiosity.  Asking the hard questions of ourselves.  Where am I going?  What am I learning from what I read, what I listen to, what I am watching on TV?  What do those I associate with have me thinking about?  Are the answers to these questions what I want my life to be about?  It isn’t chance that helps me to become what I am seeking.  It is making transformational life changes that does that.

If we are always arriving and departing, it is also true that we are eternally anchored.  One’s destination is never a place, but rather a new way of looking at things.

  – Henry Miller

When we start out on this journey of self discovery, we think that if we can just learn enough, take in enough knowledge that we will develop the wisdom to become the person we want to be.  It is the natural first step, and many of us get lost in this first step.  We do a lot of work, and it just doesn’t seem like we are making any progress.  We keep departing, but it doesn’t feel like we are ever arriving.  There is this gap.  We keep stuffing it with creative ideas, and plans, and dreams – but it doesn’t seem like we are creating anything that truly bridges that gap.  I love the word GAP – because it is Gods Area of Preparation.  That is why it doesn’t seem like the bridge is ever getting completed.  Don’t give up.  Keeping fighting to reach the other side of the gap.

I love the person I’ve become, because I fought to become her.

  – Kaci Diane

I remember the true story of an Olympic Athlete.  She went to a sports camp as a child and demonstrated some talent with volleyball.  The coach told her that if she worked hard, it would give her a scholarship to college.  So she worked hard and when it came time, she wrote to the colleges with a good volleyball program and asked them to come see her play.  She got her teachers to write letters about her and was successful in getting a full ride to college.  Her senior year in college she was watching the Olympic Games and decided to chase the dream of being in the Olympics.  So again, she wrote letters to come see her play and got her professors to write letters and was successful in getting into the tryouts.  She spent a week in tryouts and worked hard, and even though she felt the other players were better she made it to the team.  The team lived and worked in Southern California for 4 years to the next Olympic Games.  During that time she realized that if she was going to be on the team that played in the games, she needed to tear her game down and rebuild it.  Now think about this – she was good enough to get a full ride into college.  In college she was All American.  She tried out and was accepted on the Olympic Team.  Obviously she was talented and skilled.  But she knew that she could be more, so she fought to be more.

I always did something I was a little not ready to do.  I think that’s how you grow.  When there’s that moment of “wow, I’m not really sure I can do this” and you push through those moments, that’s when you have a breakthrough.

  – Marissa Meyer

So when we are having a bad day, week, month or year – that is something to remember.  Sometimes we need to tear ourselves back down to the foundations of who we are, and rebuild.  Take all of the lessons that we have learned in this life, all of the crazy experiences, hurts, blessings in disguise and know that none of it was a mistake.  Find positive ways to be in the world.  Make a difference, no matter how small it feels.  We can be the change we want to see in our world.  Be open to the challenge of change.  Face our fears of not being enough, not knowing enough, and do the things we know need to be done, even if it terrifies us.  Love who and what you are, and who you are becoming.  Trust that you have within you everything that you need to do so.  Believe in yourself.  Wish upon the stars and then put faith in that wish coming true.

Do not confuse the word “belief” with the word “wish”.  The two are not the same . . .  the element of faith is the only sure power by which a wish may be translated into a belief, and a belief into a reality.

  – Napoleon Hill

It can be really scary, to keep going when we are in the stage of moving mountains.  We see the pain, the heartache, the mistakes that we are making along the way.  We judge ourselves, we cower in fear and wish it would all just go away and leave us here in the middle of the floor, just a shapeless puddle of confusion and fears.  But what makes us powerful, is when we get up, shake off the confusion, face the fear and walk in in the power of who we really are.  When we remember that it isn’t what happens to us.  It isn’t the mistakes we made along the way that define us.  What defines us is who we chose to become in spite of all of it.  We are at the end of the journey, the only one who is responsible for who we become.  We are always  a work in progress.  Each day is a new day.  A new pattern of thoughts.  A new wave of emotions, A new belief that we can truly become what we wish to become.

You’ll learn as you get older, that rules are made to be broken.  Be bold enough to live life on your own terms, and never ever apologize for it.  Go against the grain, refuse to conform, take the road less traveled instead of the well-beaten path.  Laugh in the face of adversity, and leap before you look.  Dance as though everybody is watching.  March to the beat of your own drummer.  And stubbornly refuse to fit it.

  – Mandy Hale


A Courageous Conversation?

Are you brave enough to speak out loud the conversations that you have inside of yourself late at night when you are all alone?
  • How do we have a courageous conversation about the tragedy’s we have faced in our lives?  Some things just seem too devastating to turn from a negative to a positive experience.
  • How can we be honest with ourselves and others, around such things as overcoming addictions or similar problems?
  • What if we are trying to make positive changes in our lives, and we have “no one” in our lives to support us in making a life changing transformation?

Click below to get updates!

Or click here to learn more about the event>>

Never Be Defined By Your Past

Dear Past,Thanks for all the lessons.Dear Future,I'm Ready!

Fear is like the Wizard of Oz, projecting itself onto the screen, when in reality it is a small man behind the curtain. Don’t be afraid to move the curtain and expose the fear. Finding the blessing in the fear, is the opportunity to open your heart and mind to the idea of change and reinvention.
 
Sometimes painful things can teach us lessons that we didn’t think we needed to know.
  – Unknown
Sometimes we consciously choose to change. Other times we stumble upon ( notice the word stumble) an opportunity. Sometimes you trip over something and you catch yourself before the fall, hopping across the floor as you regain your balance. Other times you can trip over something that plants you face on the ground, and has you digging rocks off your skin. Either way there are still choices to make.
 
One of the happiest moments in life is when you find the courage to let go of what you can’t change.
  – Unknown
 
Change is an opportunity to reinvent yourself. This is where the stress really hits you fully in the face. Picture the scene in Jurassic Park when the dinosaur screams into the characters face and you can see the hair being blown back by the sheer force of the scream – that is the fear that you feel when presented with the opportunity to reinvent yourself.
 
No matter who tries to teach you lessons about life, you won’t understand it until you go through it on your own.
  – Unknown

The classic opportunities for reinvention tend to come from two things. With a heartbreak such as; losing a job, ending a relationship, the death of a close friend or family member. The classic “good but scary” opportunities for reinvention are; you go away to college, you move to a new town with a new job, you get the really big promotion such as those COO, SEO, CFO types of promotions or the best of all, you decide to be an entrepreneur and your own boss. You fill in the blank that is closest to your life today.
 
There are things in life we don’t want to happen, but have to accept; things we don’t want to know but have to learn; and people we can’t live without, but have to let go.
  – Unknown
 
Bringing an idea to life is hard work. You can expect it to cost you more personally, financially, and maybe even reputational than you thought it would. There are sleepless nights. You become a master of second guessing your choice to make this move.
 
Disney taught me to never stop believing in my dreams.
Harry Potter taught me that love and friendship dominates all kind of evil
Narnia taught me that we must all grown up & leave our childhood behind but must never forget it.
Percy Jackson taught me that there’s a hero in every one of us.
Glee taught me that no matter how different we are, there’s always that one thing we have in common  – Unknown
 

But to be truly committed we need to “burn the boats”.  This expression is a “point of no return”, where you have destroyed all other choices and are left with no options but the intention you started with.  It comes from a famous incident when a Spanish Explorer landing in Mexico ordered their ships to be burned.  They either would conquer the country or be killed, because they had no way to return home.  So take away plan b, eliminate the lifeline.  Go all out for what you are passionate about. Follow your bliss. Look at what is working and not working. What you love to do and hate to do. The key is to get immersed in what you are passionate about and hire help for the rest.

 
Each day I am thankful for nights that turned into mornings, friends that turned into family, drams that turned into reality, and likes that turned into loves.
  – Unknown
Ways to make it easier: Surround yourself with people who love to learn, share and build. Join or create a mastermind group with people who are putting their ideas into action. Seek out those in your community who solve problems and ask for suggestions. Create that special group of people who will be your cheerleaders, helping you to remain positive and take the risks that need to be taken, instead of holding yourself back.
 
And remember the three most important words in your fear busting vocabulary: Improvise, Adapt, Overcome
 
 

A Courageous Conversation?

Are you brave enough to speak out loud the conversations that you have inside of yourself late at night when you are all alone?
  • How do we have a courageous conversation about the tragedy’s we have faced in our lives?  Some things just seem too devastating to turn from a negative to a positive experience.
  • How can we be honest with ourselves and others, around such things as overcoming addictions or similar problems?
  • What if we are trying to make positive changes in our lives, and we have “no one” in our lives to support us in making a life changing transformation?

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Or click here to learn more about the event>>

Don’t Lose Yourself In The Hatred Of Others

_Don't tell me what was said about me.Tell me why they were so comfortable to say it to you__Jay Z

Stay away from people who gossip and spread rumors.  They are choosing the path of emotional bullying and negativity.

  –  Dr Steve Maraboli

This is a really profound quote. It really struck a chord in my heart because I so resonated with the underlying truth. Really sit with the words, “tell me why they were so comfortable to say what they were saying to you”. It is really a hard thing to sit with.  I think that we have all been told gossip.  Some has been quite mean and spiteful.  It can be painful even to hear, especially if is about someone we care about.  What did that person really tell you what they had heard?  

Be careful who you trust, if someone will discuss others with you, they will certainly discuss you with others.

  – Unknown

So what does it say about me, that someone might come to me with some “juicy” gossip that they are spreading about someone I know. What signals am I broadcasting that they think I want to join in and be a part of something like that? How am I telling them that I love the drama of someone else’s downfall?

It’s not your job to stop them from talking behind you, but it’s your job not to let it affect you.

  – Unknown

People for the most part will not say to you a mean or hurtful thing about someone that you really care about. People for the most part will not gossip with someone that they know won’t put up with it.

A lot of problems in the world would disappear if we talk to each other instead of about each other.

  – Unknown

There are some minor exceptions to this rule, like my father in-law. Years ago we were staying with my in-laws waiting for the closing on our home. I had went up to the kitchen to get something and he was there. He went off on a tear down of his son, about how he was a disappointment , that all of my father in-laws failures could be traced back to his children. He said mean, hurtful cruel things about his son. Finally he ran out of steam, and I just looked at him and said, “so what kind of response are you looking for here? Why are you telling me these things? I love my husband and he isn’t anything like the son that you are describing”, and walked away. He is the exception to the rule because he is so unhappy in his life, and he doesn’t want to take responsibility for how it has turned out, so he goes around trying to tear you down to his level. The only thing you can do with someone who has a toxic personality is limit the exposure to them.

Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people.

  – Unknown

Years ago I adopted the saying, “not my movie, not my drama”, for when people that I work with start down the road of tearing down someone in their life. My sister says, “not my circus, not my monkeys”. I try very hard not to join in or be around those kinds of conversations. If they won’t let the conversation be turned to something positive, then I excuse myself and walk away.

Someone who hates you normally hates you for one of three reasons.  They either see you are a threat.  They hate themselves.  Or they want to be you.

  – Unknown

What we need in our lives is more positive conversations; more love shown in both our words and out actions. More up building and less tearing down. More compassion and less drama. More celebrating of the positive accomplishments of people and less glorification of the tragedy that takes someone out.

I’m not going to tear you down . . .  if you’re bad-mouthing me, you’re already down.

  – Dr. Steve Maraboli

This even plays out in the feedback we provide around customer service. How fast are we to complain to someone in charge when we are not treated the way we want, but do we have the same rate of speed to ask for someone in charge to praise a persons excellent customer service in taking care of you?

Talking badly about someone else while they aren’t there to defend themselves says more about you than the person you’re talking about.

  – Unknown

This quote takes it a little deeper for me that just avoiding the “drama queens”. It says that the quality of the conversations that I am part of is due in some part (large or small) to what I am attracting – knowingly or unknowingly. Gives me a slice of a shadow that I didn’t realize might still be there to work on rooting out.

I know this will seem a bit crazy, but if you want to know something about me, the best person to ask, is me.

  – Unknown

When I was in high school, I was invited to a slumber party.  I didn’t know the girl well.  I was new to the school, and desperate to fit in.  There was another new girl at school that was also invited.  I am really embarrassed about what happened next.  The girls had a game where as each person would fall asleep they would start gossiping about that person.  I joined in, even though I didn’t really know any of them.  I can remember saying stuff about the other new girl, Denise.  Then feeling guilty I pretended to fall asleep so that I didn’t feel like I had to participate.  Of course, you know what happened next.  They started in our me.  As soon as I could leave without anyone noticing I did.  I walked several miles home, at 3 AM crying the entire way.  I felt horrible for what I did and how they made me feel when they started in on me.  The next day I called Denise and apologized for what I had said.  Denise and I ended up becoming best friends.  It was a life changing moment for me.  I never wanted to feel like that again, and I certainly never wanted to hurt someone like that again.

Let them judge you.  Let them misunderstand you.  Their opinions aren’t your problems.  You stay kind, committed to love and free in your authenticity.  No matter what they do or say, don’t you doubt your worth or the beauty of your truth.  Just keep shining like you always do.

  – Unknown

So remember your life purpose.  Tell your story, your voice matters, yes it is important.  You were born to make an impact.  Pursue your dreams.  Negative people need drama like oxygen.  Stay positive.  It will take their breath away.  Remember what the grandmothers used to say, “Birds peck at the best fruit”.

Some stories don’t have a clear beginning, middle and end.  Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what’s going to happen next.  Delicious ambiguity . . .

  – Gilda Radner


A Courageous Conversation?

Are you brave enough to speak out loud the conversations that you have inside of yourself late at night when you are all alone?
  • How do we have a courageous conversation about the tragedy’s we have faced in our lives?  Some things just seem too devastating to turn from a negative to a positive experience.
  • How can we be honest with ourselves and others, around such things as overcoming addictions or similar problems?
  • What if we are trying to make positive changes in our lives, and we have “no one” in our lives to support us in making a life changing transformation?

Click below to get updates!

Or click here to learn more about the event>>

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