Brand New Ending?

 

What I love about life is the ability to always make a change.  To do something different.  To be someone different.  It’s all about choice.

There are many people who look at their lives and decide they have no choices.  That life is somehow against them.  That they can’t be any different.  It is the excuse of people who feel hopeless and helpless.  But the reality is that you do get to decide how you are going to live your life.

Is this the life

you want to live?

There comes a point where it all becomes too much.  When we get too tired to fight anymore.  So, we give up.  That’s when the real work begins.  To find hope where there seems to be absolutely none at all – Christina Yang

When you are in the middle of life’s storms it may seem like all of the trees have been blown over.  The roots were just not strong enough to keep the tree anchored in the soil.  The homes around you may have suffered extreme damage and become uninhabitable.  They weren’t maintained or strong enough to survive the hurricane force winds.  When every structure you have created in your life has been ripped apart – what then?

That is the moment to notice that you are still here.  You may not be standing; you may have been knocked down.  But you are not out.  It is in this moment of realizing that you have survived that you can take stock of your life.  Because it is in this moment you learn that you were strong enough to survive.  That you get to decide what happens next.

Is this the person you want to be?

Are these the relationships you want in your life?

Is this the job/career you desire?

Is this the BEST YOU CAN BE?

Can you be stronger?

Kinder?

More Compassionate?

I’m sure that you have heard the saying “let go and let God”.  It is one of my constant reminders to myself.  It feels like letting go is easy.  It’s sort of like handing over the trouble to someone else to handle.  It relieves you of the responsibility of fighting for how you want things to turn out.

At the same time, it is human to keep the comfort zone the same.  So, while you are busy telling yourself that you have let go, you are in fact fighting to keep things the same.

How do you know if you’re fighting to keep it?  By noticing that you haven’t really moved on.  You have the same furniture in your comfort zone, you just moved it around.  In order to have a real change in your life, no matter how painful it is, you have to let it all go and move on.  You need to have a moving sale, “all must go”.  You have to donate that old furniture and get new furniture.  It’s the only way we can continue to grow.

Letting go is a release.  If you have the balloons all stacked up and tied together, they aren’t going anywhere.  It’s when you untie all of the balloons and let them go one by one.  It’s when you let the wind take up each balloon and blow it across the sky until you can’t see it anymore – that’s when you have really let it go.  What you are letting go of is not the dream itself, but the version of the dream you were trying to fulfill.

I think it is human to have some really deep-seated desires, beliefs, wishes that you know aren’t ever really going to happen.  You were raised to believe in fairy tales, in the tooth fairy, or Santa Claus, in the white knight in shining armor that was going to sweep in and rescue you.  You told yourself they weren’t real.  You thought you had released them.  Then something in life happens, and you realize you are still holding out for that forgotten dream.

It’s that kind of faith, in realities not yet beheld, that keeps us going.  And once in a while something comes into your life that gives you hope.   The hope that just maybe that thing you are still hoping for, fighting for, might just come true.  That you are going to turn the corner and have your breath taken away by the surprise of how it shows up.

The best thing in life is to go ahead with all your plans and your dreams, to embrace life and to live life everyday with passion, to lose and still keep the faith and to win while being grateful.  All of this because the world belongs to those who dare to go after what they want.  And because life is really too short to be insignificant – Charlie Chaplin

I think that sometimes we don’t see it, because we are demanding that it to show up in a certain way.  When in reality it has been in front of us all along.  It’s like the love story when the boy or girl is looking at someone as being their soul mate, when in reality the best friend they’ve had their entire life is the one.  They didn’t see what they already had.

New Endings

I think that is what new endings are all about.  To realize that the fairy tale is just slightly different than what you have been looking for.  That the dream is here right in front of you, just waiting for you to see it in its disguise.  Waiting for you to realize you’ve had your own keys all along.

This year you have some dreams that you are working on.  You have some goals that you are struggling with.  It might be that you are ready to break out of your comfort zone.  To go to that next level in your life.  To realize your full potential in your job/career; your personal relationships; your health; financial or spiritual goals.

Life changes when you realize you have the keys to your happiness in your own hands.  Don’t let them go.

Message us for more ideas on how to do this.

Will 2022 Be The Year Your Dreams Become Reality?

 

Updated 11/14/2021

We are just about 1 1/2 months until the new year.  It is the perfect time to do a year end review of 2021.  Did you make some new years resolutions, goals, plans for 2021?  How did you grow and make progress, and what have you overcome in this year?

Some people will make goals that are giving something up for a limited time or forever.  Lent is a religious practice that does this.

Some people will make goals to bring something new into their life.

What you discover every single year is that change is hard.  And if that change is motivated by will power alone, it will not last.

“In order to save myself, I must destroy first the me I was told to be” – The Dreamer

So how are you doing on those goals, plans and intentions to change?

What is your definition of progress?

Having 20/20 vision means that you have done the work to see the connections to what you have decided to change and where you are going with your dreams in this new year.  You have spent the time to map out the new year so that you can make some actual progress towards those dreams, instead of letting fears and excuses stall your journey.

“Maybe the journey isn’t so much about becoming anything. Maybe it’s about unbecoming everything that isn’t really you, so you can be who you were meant to be in the first place” – Unknown

Instead of hiding who you are, be bold and step out into the world proclaiming “I am here”.  Stop hiding your dreams, thinking that way no one can destroy them any further. Learn to trust your heart and listen to it. Give up on settling for what is possible, and demand your part in the dance of life.

“Ten years from now, make sure you can say that you chose your life, you didn’t settle for it” – Unknown

There is only one way to truly know who you are deep down inside. You have to get in touch with your own soul. You need to be by yourself, and sit with yourself, and just listen. Looking back at your life, find the places where you were really happy. Find the things that are so easy for you to do, that others find hard or impossible. Trace back all of the threads that have your name engraved upon them. Start picking out and removing all of the threads that are not you. Look for the gold and silver pieces and toss out the dross. Now look for the patterns that are left.

It is never too late to be who you were meant to be

The threads of genius that are all you, can now be taken up and made into whatever pattern you want. It is never too late to be who you were meant to be.  When you make this journey deep into your soul, you will discover that your life can only change by completely shaking it up.   You need to remove what doesn’t belong and then figure out how to rearrange what does. It is an individual journey that defines who you are. You can only discover your truth by looking for it down deep within and then integrating it into your life. 20/20 vision is a lifetime adventure. This journey is for you alone. Embrace it and live it fully.

“To make the right choices in life, you have to get in touch with your soul. To do this, you need to experience solitude, which most people are afraid of, because in the silence you hear the truth and know the solutions.” – Deepak Chopra

So, how do you make this the year that you transform your life?  You do it by finding the pattern that you fit into.  If you were to read everything about changing your life with new years resolutions, goals and plans that has been published just this month you might find it overwhelming.  Everyone has different ideas about what works.  What they really mean is what worked for them.

It’s an individual journey, one size does not fit all

What I have found is that it is really all about making the connections to what I am taking away or adding to my life purpose.  I pick what sounds right deep inside of me and leave the rest behind.  When I do this, it becomes an infinity loop of expanding energy to keep doing the work.  I want to share this process with you, so that you too can be like Goldilocks and find the pieces that fit just right.

“The spiritual journey is individual, highly personal. It can’t be organized or regulated. It isn’t true that everyone should follow one path. Listen to your own truth” – Ram Dass

It’s an individual journey and one size does not fit all.  Making your dream a reality isn’t easy.  It is sort of like having a puzzle that has the same picture that others have, but your puzzle pieces are cut slightly different.  You are missing some pieces and so you discover that they are not inter-changeable.  Some pieces might fit, but others won’t.  So you have to go to a lot of different puzzles to find the missing pieces that will fit.  It’s a risk because each piece that doesn’t really fit, becomes a failure on your part.

“. . . it’s a life’s journey of finding ourselves, finding our power, and living for yourself, not for everyone else . . . ” – Mariska Hargitay

If you don’t take the risks, make the changes and transform your life, then your destiny will not be fulfilled.   In order to make this a little easier I would love to share with you what I have found.  It’s a method of taking bits and pieces from all different methods of change and transformation and creating a pattern that allows me to plug in things that work for me.

You decide what methods of change work for you

This isn’t just about a vision board or an accountability partner.  It isn’t just about will power or a positive attitude.  Make 2022 be the year that you don’t get overwhelmed and quit.  That this time frustration doesn’t get you stuck in the mud of “it’s just isn’t working” and you give up.  It’s about getting past the negative mind talk and making real progress towards your dreams.  It is about getting on the road of good intentions and actually getting somewhere.

• You discover for yourself the answers to the questions you didn’t know you were asking.
• You look into your soul for your own individual answers, your threads.
• You discern if the puzzle piece fits exactly or not.
• You take what belongs and leave the rest behind.

What I know for sure is that we all hit walls of failure, fatigue, and flat tires. It helps to have a few tricks up your sleeves to handle them.  Then they just create slowdowns and maybe a few detours, but don’t stop you completely.

Make this your year of shift, change and transformation.  Get 2022 vision, insight and find your missing puzzle pieces.  Complete your own puzzle and see the full picture of who you are becoming.

Don’t Let Something Amazing Pass You By

“Sometimes, thing don’t go as planned.  Life doesn’t always go the way you hope it will.  You can’t plan everything.  Life takes you where it wants to – you’re pretty much just along for the ride!  Just breathe – Re-Evaluate – Step out of the box – Forgive – Be grateful.”  – Namala Lakesh

I believe in plans.  But I also believe in being flexible.  I believe in taking stock and making constant adjustments.  It’s like a sailboat.  You are subject to winds and currents, but with the rudder and sails, you have the ability to maneuver into the direction you want to go.  Which is why I love the way I plan out my month and year.  I make plans and then as life happens I see where I need to make adjustments.  To re-evaluate what is really most important in the current time and space to accomplish.  That’s why I am sharing this system with all of you.  It works!

“She stood in the storm and when the wind did not blow her away, she adjusted her sails.”  – Elizabeth Edwards

Sometimes things happen in the reverse order of your expectations.  The patience comes in because you automatically put expectations on the plans.  You visualize them out step by step, and then life happens.  You lose you job, the promised promotion and/or raise doesn’t materialize.  Someone close to you is faced with a critical medical diagnosis.  The money you had planned for vacation now has to go to put in new plumbing.  In short, life happens.  You need to adjust your sails.

“Obstacles don’t have to stop you.  If you run into a wall, don’t turn around and give up.  Figure out how to climb it, go through it, or work around it.”  – Michael Jordan

Sometimes obstacles are like the monsters under the bed.  You hear a noise.  Your imagination runs wild.  Your heartbeat goes out of control.  Suddenly you are screaming.  And it was all in your head.  Other times they are legitimate.  I remember one of the contestants in America’s Got Talent had been a singer, then tragedy struck.  She went deaf from a medical condition.  She stopped singing and gave up her career.

“Our life doesn’t always turn out the way we planned, but sometimes that’s because what we planned wasn’t suppose to be our life.”  – Gdonell

Mandy said in an interview, “I made the mistake of associating my entire identity with one single dream, and when that dream died, I very much felt like I died. I became a husk of a person for awhile.”

“Life doesn’t always go according to plan.  Sometimes heading in a new direction can be scary until you realize you’re headed toward a new and exciting destination.”  – Susan Cole

Then she got an electric tuner and spent 10 hours learning to sing each note perfectly.  “I couldn’t believe it”, she says, “My perfect pitch and muscle memory all came together.”  Mandy Harvey.

“If people are doubting how far you can go, go so far that you can’t hear them anymore.”  – Michele Ruiz

Then one day she decided to stop fighting against her dreams and start fighting for them.  She began writing her own songs and singing again.  She discovered that this real obstacle could be overcome.  She discovered that a big chunk of the real obstacle was in her own mind. Singing a song she composed she got sent straight through to the finals on America’s Got Talent.  She finished fourth.

“You don’t always need a plan.  Sometimes you just need to breathe, trust, and let go and see what happens.”  – Mandy Hale

If you take a good honest look at your life so far, you will see times where what you had planned fell apart – and that it was a good thing.  You underestimated what you were are capable of. You made plans that were far too limiting in regards to your potential.  When you let go of the expectation of the plan, and how it should go – and instead learned to feel your way with intuition, amazing things happened.

“We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us.”  – Joseph Campbell

You discover hidden talents.  You uncover better ways to expand your comfort zones.  So when the path you are walking on changes direction, don’t be afraid to keep going.  When the sign says “dead end” don’t be afraid to go off the path and create your own.  When the wind blows you backwards, grab a tree and hold on.  When life challenges you to sit it out, get up and fight to keep moving forward.

“If we can just let go and trust that things will work out the way they’re supposed to, without trying to control the outcomes, then we can begin to enjoy the moment more fully.  The joy of the freedom it brings becomes more pleasurable than the experience itself.”  – Goldie Hawn

LemonadeMakers is hosting a monthly free class on goals, resolutions, plans – whatever you want to call your means of change and transformation in your life.  We discuss on a live Zoom call what is happening that is working and not working.  Ideas to try to get us motivated to change and transform our lives.  Where we might re-evaluate our plans.  How to adjust our sails.

We invite you to join with us the first Saturday of every month.  The next class registration is opening today.  Come join us!  Click on the box to register now.

20/20 Vision For A Well Lived Life

 

Revised 1/30/2020

“A pivot is a change in strategy without a change in vision” – Eric Ries

All around the world people make plans.  They set goals.  They build on their dreams.  Every year brings you some of the same goals and maybe this year you have a few new ones.  For the majority of us that is as good as it gets.  Why?

Because sometime in January or February or maybe even March your willpower begins to fade out.  You slow down.  You procrastinate and put it off for next month (this is me – lol).  You tell yourself what’s the hurry?  I have all year to get this done.

What if this year you do something unique?  What if you pivot instead?

“You can only succeed.  You cannot fail.  Failure is impossible …, an illusion…, Nothing.  Everything moves the human story…, forward.  Everything advances you on your journey” – Neal Donald Walsh

Thinking back to secondary education (Jr. High, High School or College) did you get your assignments done when they were assigned or when they were due?  How many late nights cram sessions did you have to do to finish a paper that you had weeks to complete but waited until the last minute?

The majority of us were late night crammers.  And that is one of the things that leads us to fail in our dreams. resolutions, goals, and plans.  Not fail as in we can’t do it but fail as in, we decide to quit trying to do it.

When you make your goals with the intention of accomplishing them within 12 months, you will delude yourself that you have plenty of time until there isn’t any time, and then you will quit.  Why?

You are out of integrity with your life

Because unlike school when you would have failed a class and then been grounded by a parent, you are only lying to yourself.

The problem with lying to yourself though, is that you are then out of integrity with yourself, and it plays out in your life over and over again.  Every time you say you are going to do something, that negative voice will say – “yeah right – you know that you are not really going to accomplish this, so why waste any time or effort in pretending.”

“We’re here to put a dent in the universe.  Otherwise, why else even be here” – Steve Jobs

This year what if instead of a 1-year plan, why don’t you do something different?  Do a weekly plan.  You choose how many weeks you want to plan for.  12 weeks is sufficient to work in a new positive habit.  For most goals it gives you enough time to plan out how to accomplish it.  If the goal needs more than 12 weeks such as education, plan out major steps that can be accomplished within 12 weeks.

Ready?

Get out your pencil and three pieces of paper for this exercise.  I want you to limit yourself to three goals.  Write one goal on each sheet of paper.

“How does the WHY relation to the vision” – Simon Sinek

Now write down some steps that would need to happen in order for you to accomplish your goal.  As an example, you might want to go back to school to get a degree for a change in your career or to help you advance further in your degree.  Since this is probably more than 1 year, plan out 3 steps that can be accomplished within the chosen number of weeks.

• You must also write down the WHY this goal is important to you.
• What dream is it helping you accomplish?
• How do you feel about that dream?
• What emotions does it create deep inside of you?
• What is the importance of it to you – not anyone else?

If it isn’t pulling you to complete it, it’s not really your goal.  Keep digging until you reach that place where the dream hooks you.  Then do the following step.

• #1 – find three colleges that you would like to attend.
• #2 – Look up the website and download information on the classes required to get your degree.
• #3 – Call and talk to an admissions officer about your plans.

Only list three steps that can be accomplished within the chosen timeframe.  Your goals should always be driven to your life purpose.  To move forward into who you are meant to be, who you are becoming.  Otherwise, it is just wasting your time, effort and money.

Always check in with our inner guidance system and follow where that is leading us.  There will always be some positive emotions, some connection – it will lead us if we get quiet and listen and feel for it.

“The only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work.  And the only way to do great work is to love what you do.  If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking.  Don’t settle” – Steve Jobs

For a budget goal, you could plan out goals for each pay period.  Weekly, biweekly, monthly – according to the time frame your paychecks arrive.

• #1 – spreadsheet with lines completed for each bill that is due within the pay period.  List the name of the bill, date due, amount due, balance due.  List the net income after taxes.  Deduct all payments to arrive at a balance left after paying all of the bills.
• #2 – Determine your goals – saving money for vacations; for a big purchase such as a car or home; rainy day fund; education fund for your children; etc…,
• #3 – Goals for zero debt – what debts to payoff first, second, etc…,

Continue in a similar manner for your third goal.  What is so cool about this pivot is that you can play with it to see what number of weeks works for you.  The budget goal for example will continue all year long.  You will have accomplishments for each time period that you are working through.  Celebrate each milestone – it is what fuels you to the next milestone and gets you over the disappointments when life happens and creates havoc in accomplishing our dreams.

“If the challenge we face doesn’t scare us, then it’s probably not that important” – Simon Sinek

I know that if someone gives me something I may or may not make the time to actually do the work.   So, take a second and think about what I wrote up above.  Did you take out paper and pencil or did you just read through it thinking that you would come back later and do it?

What I also know about myself is that if someone takes the time to work with me through the material, I get some action and forward momentum started. I will answer the questions and get my brain thinking and planning.  So, take this small first step for 2020 and let’s create something personally designed just for you!

Commit to your dreams.  Travel down a clear path to your date with destiny.

Do You Have The Courage To Fulfill Your Dreams?

“If your dreams don’t scare you, they aren’t big enough”  – Unknown

It takes determination when you are knocked down to get back up, but it is only when we have been knocked down that courage enters.  It takes courage to face the failure.  It takes courage to try it one more time.  It takes courage to find failure once more in your face daring you to try again.

Is it failure or part of the divine plan?

In life many things don’t happen the way we plan them.  In a lot of cases what seems like failure is actually part of the divine plan.  Years ago I walked away from a pretty secure job because I was promised the opportunity for advancement at another company.  I took on the responsibility of completing a manual of guidelines for the new company because the person they had hired for it wasn’t getting it done.  I had never written anything before other than papers for school.  I figured that I could simply expand that knowledge into something new and I did.

Then shortly afterwards the market turned and I was laid off.  Because the market had slowed down in Southern California, there weren’t  any jobs available and we ended up having to relocate back to the Seattle area for me to find employment.  I had berated myself for leaving the previous company; for believing the owner of that new company; for the market turndown.  I had beat myself up pretty badly.

An interesting thing happened in Seattle.  The Savings and Loan I was hired to work for hired me in the advanced position I wanted.  The S&L needed a servicing manual and I had the experience to write it.  I was also hired to teach a course for loan processing and underwriting at South Seattle Community College and Renton Voc-Tech.  All things I wouldn’t have had the courage or opportunity to reach for if I hadn’t made that job change back in California.

I believe it was all part of divine planning.  Can you think of such examples in your own life?  Times when what you planned shifted and changed into what you thought was failure, but was actually part of the plan all along?

Of Caterpillars and leaps of faith

“The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams”  – Eleanor Roosevelt

It is in seeing the beauty of your dreams that you are able to get back up after you have failed.  Finding your life purpose and then bringing it out into the world isn’t an easy journey.  While your soul will not give up, your mind is constantly entreating you to give up.  Seek the peace of sleep.  Take it easy.

“You get in life what you have the courage to ask for”  – Oprah

It’s a constant tug of war between mind and spirit.  When your soul is inspired it sets you on fire.  You find yourself doing things you never would have dreamed it was possible to do.  Every negative thought your mind produces is shot down.  Like the caterpillar you have the push to transform beyond any understanding.

“Don’t spend time beating on a wall hoping to transform it into a door”  – Coco Chanel

Like the caterpillar you learn new skills, building a space in which to transform.  That is what goals and dreams are all about – change and transformation.

You have this yearning to be something different from what you are currently being.  You have these feelings that you can’t really put words to.  You just know that you have to do it.  Can you imagine the caterpillar building a chrysalis and then standing back and judging it as not being good enough?  That the caterpillar would just turn away and forget the whole transformation thing?

The caterpillar doesn’t care that he has never built anything before.  He doesn’t care if it isn’t the perfect shape, or on the wrong branch.  He doesn’t care if the wind is blowing it sideways and maybe today isn’t the best day to complete it.  He is so involved, that he has gone so far out of his comfort zone, it isn’t even in the same town or state.

He is so involved with using these skills – skills that he didn’t even know he was capable of learning, that he is taking a huge leap of faith.  A leap of faith that what he has built, is what it is supposed to look like and feel like.  He trusts his divine inner guidance and forges ahead.  He trusts that what he is becoming will allow him to transform his outer being in such a way that he will fly.

Where does such trust come from?

• It’s in the realization that everyone else is just as scared as you are.
• It’s in the realization that everyone fails.  Falls down.
• It’s in the realization that at the moment you have a choice – to quit or remember WHY you are trying in the first place.
• It’s in the realization that fulfilling a dream means that you are striving to do things you think you cannot do.

You know down deep in your heart and soul that you will never regret giving everything you have to accomplish your dreams.  You know that giving your best effort and then digging down to bring up that tiny bit of extra you didn’t know you were capable of will be worth the cost.  How do you know this?

“The women whom I love and admire for their strength and grace did not get that way because shit worked out.  They got that way because shit went wrong, and they handled it.  They handled it in a thousand different ways on a thousand different days, but they handled it.  Those women are my superheroes”  – Elizabeth Gilbert

Because you see everywhere examples of where other people have done just that.  They worked stuff out, no matter the cost.  It’s not a one size fits all world.  It’s through trial and error that we work stuff out.  You have a secret weapon.  You figured out that in every single change, rather than judging it as good or bad, you see the possibilities rather than the problem.

That’s what the loss of a job in Southern California and the wonderful opportunities that opened up in Seattle taught me.  In every single change, there is a long hallway.  A hallway with all of these doors of possibility open and inviting you to step through.  That is where is courage comes into play – stepping through the door and into the possibilities.

Do What Makes Your Soul Shine

 

“Have goals, Chase dreams, but do not let your Happiness depend on their achievement”  – Manoj Arora

There is a promise today that we can achieve happiness from living a better life.  It might be taking certain herbs, oils or medications.  The promise of living a vegan, vegetarian, paleo lifestyle, that somehow having a special diet will make us feel happier.  Detoxing from all electronics.  Living a simple lifestyle, purging our homes of all the material things others think make them happier.  They all promise to somehow give us more energy and therefore more happiness.

You might still buy into that vision of being super woman – the woman that can balance raising children, maintain a pristine “Better Homes & Garden” home, successfully climb the corporate ladder, and still wear the sexy lingerie every night.  Who can be the soccer mom, volunteer at school. and bake homemade cookies for the classroom.  That mom who schedules and drives to every doctor appointment, after school activity, and social event.

“Sweetheart, marry your goals.  Remain committed to success and be loyal to your dreams.  It’s okay to choose yourself”  – r.h. Sin

Focus on what matters

You are so busy chasing perfection, that happiness when it briefly touches you, it is lost as a momentary endorphin high. With each hit, we immediately start seeking the next one.

“Don’t chase your dreams . . , Instead . . , Hunt your goals” – Preeya

Pause

Instead of moving immediately to the next thing on your list, sit on the feelings of happiness. Notice those moments of being grateful, relaxed, and appreciated that come from being happy. Feel it completely. Focus on the joy.

Like taking that first bite of your favorite food, savor the feeling from the top of your body down to your toes. Taking the time to fully experience happiness converts it from a temporary endorphin high to making it a lasting change in your mind and mood.

“She loves – the smell of coffee; blooming roses; and new beginnings” – Unknown

There is this balance of being happy from when you get a raise, and the happiness of completing a complex long term goal. The first one lifts your mood (an endorphin high) – like a favorite song that makes you want to sing and dance. The second one is deeply fulfilling because it was difficult to achieve.  The amount of happiness in your life is dependent on the quality of your thoughts.

Get granular

The question to ask yourself is “what is your definition” of a life well lived?  All you will get from chasing perfection is exhaustion.  Get curious about what makes you happy?  Your current circumstances have nothing to do with your current state of happiness or lack thereof.  Ask yourself where your passion comes from?  What gives you joy?

“Do not chase another human being.  Instead, chase your curiosity.  Chase your development and your goals.  Chase your passion.  Strive to work for something bigger than yourself, and instead of trying to convince someone that you fit within their world – build your own”  – Bianca Sparacino

It’s the little things that create a lasting happiness.

• The playlist that elevates your mood – Pharrel Williams “Happy” (did your mind just start singing this song?)
• Celebrating every step you make in achieving your goals – completing 7 days of 15 minute workouts
• Friend networks that keep us committed and accountable – text reminders, phone calls, meetups
• Find the things that spark your joy and include them in your daily schedule – take time to smell the roses
• Gratitude – make a daily list of three things you are grateful for each day

“In the midst of movement and chaos, keep stillness inside of you”  – Deepak Chopra

Make your own list of little things that make you happy and include those things with every goal you create.  You will find it easier to start each new goal and to build and keep momentum in accomplishing each goal. It’s vitally important to remember that the goals you set are not a final destination.

“There is no substitute for the creative inspiration, knowledge, and stability that comes from knowing how to contact your core of inner silence”  – Deepak Chopra

Goals, dreams and visions are a part of the journey, not your final destination.  The combination of the quality of goals you set for yourself and how they expand your comfort zone creates who you are becoming.  It is the self knowledge that each experience reveals to you that tells you where you are on your journey of self knowledge.  It is walking in the direction of your life’s purpose that brings in lasting happiness.

I invite you to join us on February 1st for a live workshop on how to make 2020 the year of achievement.

Get clear on what you want and how to obtain it. If your 2020 goals are already stalling, get recharged and refocused. Learn how to pivot to success.

Just click below to get started.

Instead of just thinking “I could do this” come and find out just how much you can do, confront your deepest fears. Stop playing small. Shine out in all of your brilliance. Give yourself permission to be all that you can be in 2020.

Get Clarity By Magnifying Your Life Purpose

“If you can tune into your purpose and really align with it, setting goals so that your vision is an expression of that purpose, then life flows much more easily.”  – Jack Canfield

There is a dream that you had as a child.  It was a persistent dream.  It was a longing that would not be denied.  Maybe you went for it and failed.  Or maybe you were too scared to even try.  Or maybe you had the “one hit wonder” and then faded away, too afraid that you could never repeat or even surmount the dream.  That dream contained your purpose.  How it was fulfilled was your vision of what it could be.

“Focus on your own happiness, focus on your own life, focus on your own vision.”– GreatestQuotes.net

My dream was to write. 

I did well in school.  I loved learning.  I would read 6-7 books a week.  I would check out the maximum number of books every week and read them all.  My family was always moving somewhere new.  Until my Freshman year in high school I didn’t attend any complete grade in one school.  So books were my best friends and my escape.  And every single book I read, I would say to myself, “I could write this book.  Maybe even write it better than the author did.”

“Life will only change when you become more committed to your dreams than you are to your comfort zone.”  – Peerhustle.com

The problem was while I told myself that, the doing of the actual writing was outside of my comfort zone and I was terrified that I wasn’t as smart as I thought I was.  The fact that I got straight A’s and was in honors didn’t overcome the fears.  In fact it magnified them.  In my mind I was sitting on the pedestal and if I actually tried to write a book, I would topple off the pedestal and be subject to ridicule.

“Don’t try to overhaul your life overnight.  Instead, focus on making one small change at a time.  Over time, those small changes will add up to big transformation.  Don’t give up!” – emilysquotes.com

So I dreamed of writing year after year and fed my purpose a starvation diet of book after book that someone else who was smarter and braver wrote while I just dreamed about it.  I believe that God plants your purpose inside of you.  It never goes away.  I believe that door after door of opportunity comes you way to express it to its full potential.  I believe that the ups and downs of life itself are generated in such a way to try to coax you or force you to take up your dream and live it.

“A vision of a desired future allows you to engage and identify immediately in your focus with an improved condition.  It changes what you perceive and how you perform – NOW.  It’s not about achieving something in time.  It’s rather about the quality of choices you are making in this moment – what you choose to perceive, feel, and do.  It’s about getting the most out of your experience.”– David Allen

I believe that at least one of the New Year’s Resolutions or goals that you set – are a part of your life purpose. 

When my nephew was murdered I was forced through the door of writing.  I didn’t really understand what was happening at first.  By the time I realized that I had committed myself to writing LemonadeMakers I had literally changed my world.  All my goals before that were about changing myself to make other people happy.  Lose weight and be healthy for my family.  Climb the corporate ladder so that my family would be secure financially, and so on.

“Focus on where you want to go instead of the obstacles in your path.  Drive and persistence will take you to your desired destination.”– slideshare.net

Now all of a sudden, the question that I was asking was,

“Who do I need to be to make LemonadeMakers be what it is supposed to be? What do I need to learn? What habits do I need to bring into my life? Who can help me?”

It is such a unique space of focus away from fear of not being loved if I wasn’t giving all of me to my family or job – to the space of how can I help others find this place seeing “what else is possible”? It is kind of funny when I finally understood that giving all of me to my family or job was from fear and not love. And now I am finally living most of my time from love and not fear. Fear still shows up, disguised as self sabotage. Then fear is shown to the door, when once again I recognize it for what it is.

Somewhere in your goals that you are setting for 2020 is a part of your life purpose. 

It is the thing that you dream about when your mind wanders.  What is it that you do, that is similar to my inside my head comment when I was reading a good book.  What is your version of a “I could do this”?  Think about the thing that pops into your head, that is immediately discounted by your negative self talk.  There is something there to explore and understand more fully.

That “thing” will keep showing up month after month, year after year, decade after decade.  That idea or concept will not leave you – it can’t. It will keep haunting you, until you are expressing it to its fullest potential or you have died with the dream still unfulfilled within you.  So take a leap of faith.  Be brave.

Come join us on February 1st for our “Living the Dream” free workshop and take the first step in putting your dream into reality.

We are going to explore some ideas outside of the box on how to start living our dreams.  We are going to dig into our goals and expose the root systems to see how they connect to our life purpose.  It is more than a dream board.  It is more than writing the dream out on paper.  It is more than a calendar full of appointments and meetings and blocking out time to implement what needs to be done and when you will do it.  It is  more than a single leap of faith or five baby sets of doing something.

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light. . , that most frightens us. . , ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?’ . . , who are you not to be?. . , Your playing small does not serve the world . . , We are all meant to shine. . ,  as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” ― Marianne Williamson

I invite you to join us on February 1st for a live workshop on how to make 2020 the year of achievement. Get clear on what you want and how to obtain it. If your 2020 goals are already stalling, get recharged and refocused. Learn how to pivot to success.

Just click below to get started.

During the call you will have the opportunity to create, find a pivot or two, reimagine and refuel your life dreams.

I know that if someone gives me something I may or may not make the time to actually do the work. But if someone takes the time to work with me through the material I get some action and forward momentum started. So take this small first step for 2020 and lets create something personally designed just for you!

Instead of just thinking “I could do this” come and find out just how much you can do, confront your deepest fears. Stop playing small. Shine out in all of your brilliance. Give yourself permission to be all that you can be in 2020.

 

What Story Will This Year Add to Your Life?

 

They say that we all have at least one book inside of us.  It could be a biography; a cookbook; gardening; crafts; fiction or nonfiction.  You could write science fiction, mystery, comedy, drama and so on.  You might have overcome tragedy and write about how you did it.  All kinds of ideas can come creeping inside of your head on what you would want to pass on to the next generation.  Lessons learns that can help others live a happier more fulfilled life.

Your entire life journey ultimately consists of the steps you are taking at this very moment – S. Williams

You might look at the goal of writing a book and shrink back.  It’s going to take a lot of time and sacrifice to write.  It might not be, no – it definitely won’t be any good.  The publishers will reject it and then I will have wasted all of that time and effort.  You might come up with a million reasons and excuses on why not – but what if you did it for the one right reason?  What reason?

You have a story to tell

What if this year is different and you choose to tell it?  How could you make it happen?  How do you make any kind of big hairy audacious goal happen?  The same way the joke says that you eat an elephant – one bite at a time.

A pivot to me is an about movement.  A turning point.  A radical way of viewing something that expands your universe as well as your personal space.  It is the realization that we are all the same, yet at the same time you have the ability to be your own unique person.  It is the understanding that one size does not fit all, and you have the gift of being able to alter any situation into one that does fit the one of a kind “YOU”.

Your vision helps you focus on your dreams – Chris D Costello

So, what is your big dream?

• Writing a book?
• Making a change in your career?
• Going back to school?
• Moving someplace far away?
• Traveling to see the world?
• What is on your bucket list?

What’s holding you back?

The typical answers are time and money.  You might have one but not the other.  But that isn’t really what is holding you back.  Fear is what does it.

Chase one rabbit at a time

There is a proverb that says that if you chase two rabbits, you won’t catch either one.  Maybe one of the issues with New Year’s Resolutions is that we are all chasing more than one rabbit?

That’s what I love about the idea of changing the time frame from a yearly resolution to a smaller time frame.  You can chase one rabbit at a time.

So, this year try something new.  Take your goal, your big hairy audacious goal, and put it into bite size chunks.

It could be one week at a time, four weeks at a time; twelve weeks at a time – you decide what works for you.  Say for example you want to write a book.  Start with a story line – Who is your hero?  Your protagonist?  What are their stories?  Their dreams of life and their failures.  Sketch them out – families, school, work, friends.

Focus means:  F-ollow;  O-ne;  C-ourse;  U-ntil;  S-uccess – Unknown

Start with a three-hour block of time per week.  You can have one three-hour block of time, or three one-hour blocks.  Do what you know you can commit to.

Keep a notebook with you to write down thoughts and ideas as they occur to you.  Write down your dreams the minute you wake up, because your subconscious is going to start working in your favor.  It’s going to give you whole scenes to write down.

Your story is based on who you become in your lifetime.  It is based on small decisions and large ones.  It is based on what life throws your way and what you throw back.  It is based on what you create out of what you have been given.

When I was first married my husband went to an auction with one of his friends.  He came home with a box.  It was a random box of stuff that they auctioned unopened.  Inside was stuff you probably would have thrown away and not even given to the goodwill.

What can I make out of this?

I was mad at first that he wasted his money.  Then I became determined to do something positive and useful with this box of stuff.  I took apart all of the material from the clothes inside the box and created a baby quilt out of it for our first child.  I still think of that today whenever life has given me a box of stuff, I think I can’t use.  I take it apart and say, now what can I make out of this?

When I dare to be powerful – to use my strength in the service of my vision, then it becomes less and less important whether I am afraid – Audre Lorde

• What is your vision?
• What is your three most critical things to do with your life this year?
• What is your plan to get it done?
• As time passes, how is your focus on getting it done?

What distractions and obstacles are showing up in your life at this moment?

From a solution perspective, how do you live your life on purpose?  A key ingredient is knowing when to pivot, to rethink your plan, while still accomplishing your goals.  It’s a new year – you have made some plans, goals, or resolutions for this year, is it time to pivot? To rethink your plan?

Don’t waste any more time

Don’t waste any more time avoiding your dreams or thinking that they are impossible. Pick them up and make them a priority.

Need some ideas to unlock your potential?  Contact us.

Find Your Missing Puzzle Piece To Living A Life Of Purpose

 

“A vision is not just a picture of what could be; it is an appeal to our better selves, a call to become something more” – Rosabeth Moss Kanter

When you are living a life on purpose, what does that really mean?  You see yourself on a journey to accomplish something that is important to you.  Say for example that you want to run a marathon.  You set a goal of getting up every morning at 4 AM to run before you go to work.

Now you and I know that there are going to be mornings when you don’t want to get out of bed.  When you promise yourself that you will just sleep in this one time and that you will run when you get home instead.  But of course, when you get home, you have so many things to do that evening that you are too tired to run.

When your will power runs dry, what then?

Your actions will always, be 100% congruent with your thinking.  So, if you set a goal to run a marathon, and you set up a plan of how much running you must do in order to complete the marathon – yet you find yourself not getting up at 4 AM as planned, then your thinking is not congruent with your goals.

“You have to have a lot of passion for what you are doing because it is so hard …, if you don’t, any rational person would give up” – Steve Jobs

You need a change of thinking.  You need a breakthrough.  A breakthrough is a natural result of a shift in your thinking.  You suddenly connect past, present, future into a thought that sheds light on something you never saw before.  When you have a breakthrough, it feels as though the DNA in your body has changed every single cell.  Like one moment you knew who you were.  Then the next moment you are someone totally new.  You realize that you can never go back to what you were before.

Shifting your mindset can create opportunities that you never imagined were possible.  Many times, it happens when you run out of ideas.  When you hit the wall.  When you finally let go and let God.  It clarifies and simplifies everything.  It’s like the spotlight appears out of the darkness and shows you the way home.  You become more of who you are supposed to be.

Become more of who you are supposed to be

“Awareness is not a giver of solace – it is just the opposite.  It is a disturber and an awakener” – Robert K Greenleaf

It is kind of funny what happens when you wake up and become aware of how simple life can really be.  You are full of plans to run the marathon.  You are taking action.  Then something happens, and everything changes.

• Do you give up?
• Do you throw in the towel?
• Or do you do something outside the box?
• Something risky – something you’ve never tried and aren’t really sure can work?

Your “WHY” is what creates a compelling vision for your life of purpose

How does your “WHY” relate to the vision you have created?  Your “WHY” is what creates a compelling vision for your life of purpose.  It will clearly capture and establish an emotional connection to keep you on purpose to your vision.

It gets you up at 4 AM excited to go running, even in the rain or when you are just too tired to even press the snooze button.  Your “WHY” is the means to get you to the end result – running in that marathon.

Around 20 years ago, in the month of January, my middle son got engaged.  They set the date to get married in August.  I was so happy for them.  I wanted to pay for their dream honeymoon.  I contacted the travel agent they were working with and got all of the details.  I sat down and planned it out exactly how I could pay for it.

“Hold the vision.  Trust the process” – Unknown

A couple of weeks later they decided to move the date to May.  I was devastated.  I could see no way to pay for it in time.  I decided to try something new I had learned about at a real estate seminar.  I sat down and wrote out a letter expressing how happy I was that I could pay for their honeymoon.  How they had the best time at their dream destination.

About two weeks later I got a phone call out of the blue about 10 acres that we owned in rural Upstate New York.  The neighbors across the street wanted to purchase the property for cash and they were ready to close it immediately.  We settled on the price and two weeks later I had the exact amount needed to pay for the honeymoon.

Want to learn how to do the same thing?

How did this happen?  I created a compelling vision of what I wanted to do.  Not how it would get done.  I captured all of the emotions involved in being able to do this for my son and his new wife.  It created an emotional connection to my vision.  It opened doors I didn’t even know existed.  Want to learn how to do the same thing?

“If you are working on something exciting that you really care about, you don’t have to be pushed.  The vision pulls you” – Steven Jobs

I know that if someone gives me something I may or may not make the time to actually do the work. But if someone takes the time to work with me through the material, I get some action and forward momentum started. So, take this small first step for 2022.  Create something personally designed just for you!

If you want some ideas and brainstorming, contact me via LemonadeMakers.

Launch Yourself on Every Wave

 

Life, like surfing, is all about wave selection and balance. Never let the best waves in life pass you by. Ride it now before it’s too late – Kiteboardstuff.com

I believe that your dreams, your true dreams, are given to you at birth.  That you are designed to grow and stretch beyond what you think you are capable of.

That you were given heroes journeys to push you to accomplish the dreams.  That those dreams are what make you passionate and give you a life of purpose.

I think of people who are adventurers and broke open new journeys you didn’t even know you could go on.  People like the Wright Brothers, who pioneered the ability to fly.  Pilots like Charles Lindbergh and Amelia Earhart who created and broke records in pioneering flight.  Amelia Earhart said, “What do dreams know of boundaries?”

She had true unfaltering determination and pushed her limits.  She said, “when you fail, your failure must be but a challenge to others”.  I love the concept of my failures actually serving as something positive – to challenge others to succeed in their own dreams.

You don’t get into something to test the waters.  You get into things to make waves – Rituals

Every year there are new tech companies that are creating a new cutting-edge business or disrupting an industry.  Right now, someone is launching themselves in trying to fulfill a dream they never thought they could accomplish.  The really critical thing is to not give up on your dream as being too far beyond your capability to accomplish.

When someone decided one day that they wanted to be a mountain climber, they didn’t just walk out the door and climb a mountain.

• They got training in how to use the equipment
• They got training both in the body and the mind, to equip them for the journey.
• They started with small mountains and worked their way up to the bigger ones.
• They joined a club with others who like that sport, becoming a member of a team.
• They fell down, got back up and fell down again and again, until they started reaching mastery.

It is done step by step, day by day, year by year.

The only way to make sense out of change is to plunge into it, move with it, and join the dance – Alan Watts

You have to grow and expand your comfort zone again and again.  You have to have the trust that you deserve to fulfill the dream.  You work hard to get the skills that are necessary to make it happen.  You learn to trust yourself and your team.

Change is part of the dance of your life.  You learn to trust the dream as it shifts, changes and transforms too.

Sometimes as you are moving towards the dream, it is like driving through fog.  All you can see is the next 10 feet in front of you.  You travel towards what you see and as you travel, you see farther and farther.  You might see what you thought was a mailbox on the side of road shift into something else as you get clearer eyesight.

This is because your brains will take what little you can see or decipher, and basically guess at what you are seeing based on past knowledge. But as you get more clarity by pursuing the dream it seems to shift its shape into something totally different.

It’s not so much that the dream is changing as it is that you are getting a better understanding about what the dream really is.  Each problem that you encounter and solve changes you.  Each change brings the dream into more clarity.

You begin to realize that there are 50 different ways you can achieve your dream.  That your expectations around the dream are what is really changing, not the dream itself.  You begin to truly imagine the possibilities of the dream.

The big waves in life might come from outside of you, but the ability to ride them comes from inside of you – from your character strengths – Fatima Doman

Over and over again you can see the concept of “as above, so below”.

The teaching of the tree of your life reaching high into the heavens and deep below the surface with the roots.  Life is not lived in one direction only.  If you are reaching only for the sky and neglect your roots, the imbalance in your life may create temporary success, but will inevitably fall over.  And if you only feed the roots and neglect reaching for the heavens, then you won’t produce anything positive in your life.

It is the combination of inner and outer growth that leads to true lasting success.

I love the concept of “together we are an ocean”.  If you are interested, I can help you learn how to create your own personalized dream map, claim your own unique goals of change and transformation; refine them into goal crushing gremlins; and finally, to truly understand what your motivation around those goals is all about.

It’s not just about writing some words on a piece of paper that says in 30 days I will . . . ,   It’s not just about creating a vision board with pretty pictures of our dream house, vacations, our dream body or $1M in our bank account, and then waiting for the “magic” to draw in what we want in our lives.

You need to brainstorm your way to make your dreams a reality.  To map out your detours around your own unique self-sabotaging obstacles, and finally be able to fully implement your plan.

What I know for sure is that you will hit walls of failure, fatigue.  At some point you will get that feeling that “Life happens to you”, when it really is happening for you.  It will feel like when you are getting hit with a sledgehammer.  It helps to have a few tricks up your sleeves to handle those times, so that they just create slowdowns.  Just don’t give up and stop completely.

As a kid did you ever play the game Red Light/Green Light?  You had someone who called out Red Light for Stop and Green Light for Go.  The goal was to reach the finish line first.  Let’s change that game just a little. 

It’s Not Just About Chasing A Dream, It’s About Catching It Too

 

Never give up on a dream just because of the time it will take to accomplish it.  The time will pass anyway – Earl Nightingale

On your birthday and at the beginning of each new year you take a look at both the time that has passed, and what time might yet be available to you.

• You think of the dreams you have that haven’t come true yet.
• You wonder if you have what it takes to get them done.
• You might even judge yourself of not being worthy of them coming true.

I firmly believe that if God has planted something in your heart to do, then you must have the ability to do it.  At the same time, you might wonder if he’s really, really sure you can do it, because it feels like it is just out of reach.  You might wonder “who am I” to go after something that big.  Fears creep in all sorts of shapes and sizes to prevent the dreams from being fulfilled.

My son was visiting with his wife and a little dog.  They took in a rescue dog.  He’s named after the pirate in the movie The Goonies – “One-Eyed Willie” because before they got him, he had lost an eye.

Willie loves cheese.  My son will hold up a piece of cheese and Willie will jump up to get it.  He will hold it up just out of Willie’s “normal” jumping ability and it is amazing how high that little dog will jump for his cheese.  At first you think he can’t do it, but he is determined and somehow, he gets just a little bit higher and grabs his cheese.  We all cheer for him.

When you are pursuing a dream, it has to be something just out of reach.  Otherwise, it isn’t something that stretches you.  It must be something that you aren’t sure how to do or what to do to make it happen.  Like Willie, if you want it bad enough, you will find that little bit of extra strength and leap up just high enough to grab “your cheese” (dream) and pull it down into reality.

Take a moment and write this out for yourself (taken from the program DO IT SCARED with my own additions) fill in the blanks at the end of each sentence.

Every year millions of people make New Year’s Resolutions or Goals.  If you have ever joined a gym, you see it happen year after year.  The goal of weight loss or physical fitness of some sort is made, and the gyms are all packed in January.  In February they begin losing a few people.  In March a few more and by April the gym is back to what is normal attendance.

Why do we make goals each year that after a few months fall by the wayside?  And what can you do to make this year different?

So many of our dreams at first seem impossible, then they seem improbable, and then when we summon the will, they soon become inevitable – Christopher Reeves

I don’t think it is just a matter of being or having something you truly desire.  And it isn’t just a matter of will power.  Or attitude.  Or a million other words that mean essentially the same thing as motivation.  It is more complicated than that.

• Some of it is planning.
• Some of it is accountability.
• Some of it is getting past the feeling of overwhelm.  You have so much on your list of what needs to be done, or what you may not even know how to do.
• Some of it is getting past feeling frustrated when you seem to be stuck in the mud and can’t make any progress.

So many other little negative reasons, stop signs, or caution lights that add up to another year, in which you didn’t make any or very little progress towards your dreams.

Create a vision that is crisp and clear.  A perfect clarity for both the near distance and far into the future.  To build on your foundation of living a better life, whatever that means to you personally.  A year where you can make progress each month and celebrate what you are accomplishing.

A dream written down with a date becomes a goal.  A goal broken down into steps becomes a plan.  A plan backed by action makes your dreams come true – unexpectedlydomestic.com

In pursuit of that, take the paragraph that you wrote out above and chose three words that will create three big hairy audacious goals for this year.

Rather than just talking about how to fill in a bunch of answers and creating a goal plan with steps, I would love to invite you to contact me via messenger.

• Learn how to claim your goals.
• Learn how to refine them.
• Learn how to understand what your motivation around those goals is about.

It’s not just about you writing some words on a piece of paper.  It’s also about brainstorming your way, mapping out the detours around the obstacles to fully implement your plan.

What I know for sure is that we all hit walls of failure, fatigue, and flat tires.  It helps us to have a few tricks up our sleeves to handle them so that they just create slowdowns and maybe a few detours, but not letting anything stop you completely.

Pursuing Life’s Dreams, Second Star to the Right and Straight On With No Distractions

And every day, the world will drag you by the hand, yelling, “This is important! And this is important! And this is important! You need to worry about this! And this! And this! And each day, it’s up to you to yank your hand back, put it on your heart and say, “No. This is what’s important.”

– Ian Thomas

What we all need to realize, is that the lights of the passing ships are mere distractions preventing you from living your life to the fullest.  They are the battles that you fight each day, but which do not lead us anywhere.  When we honestly realize how asleep we are in our lives, those are the moments when you can begin to challenge the ongoing distractions and bring focus back to the stars – the lights of our true destination.

In a world deluged by irrelevant information, clarity is power.

  – Yuval Noah Harari

It’s like someone has set up a circus tent in front of us.  You hear the chaos of the music and the shouting barkers telling you about what’s happening in their tents.  You hear the shouts and screams of people as they spin and circle and go up and down on the rides.  You smell the funnel cakes and cotton candy and popcorn.  Bright lights spin on the games as they encourage you to step up and try your luck.  So many distractions that you can’t hear yourself think.  All of the bright shiny objects promising you the moon, if you just come nearer and pay attention to them.  It is a constant battle for your attention.  Who wins?  The one you pay attention to.

It is those who concentrate on but one thing at a time who advance in this world.

– Og Mandino

I love to ride the roller coaster.  To watch the performers with the animals.  To see the daring artist high up on the trapeze dancing across the wire.  There are lots of fun and exciting things that we can do in our life.  What we have to decide is are they part of our goals and dreams, or are they just fun distractions that keep us occupied, distracted.  Are they keeping us occupied so that we are not making the changes and transformations that we need to make in order to achieve the life of our dreams?  Are they fun things that we should be saying “no” to?

The successful warrior is the average man, with laser-like focus.

– Bruce Lee

Are we living our life with laser-like focus?  I always think of Bruce Lee when he is in his stance about to engage with someone in battle.  He doesn’t hear the sounds around him.  He doesn’t see the bright shiny objects trying to distract him.  He see’s only one thing – the man in front of him that he’s about to engage in battle with.

The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes.

– Marcel Proust

Remember the movie City Slickers?  Remember Curly, Jack Palance’s character?  I love his famous line –

“Curly : Do you know what the secret of life is?
[holds up one finger]
Curly : This.
Mitch : Your finger?
Curly : One thing. Just one thing. You stick to that and the rest don’t mean shit.
Mitch : But, what is the “one thing?”
Curly : [smiles] That’s what *you* have to find out.”

When you are pursuit of the “that one thing”, then the rest of the world fades away.  We don’t see the lights of the passing ships – we are laser focused on that star – that bright shining light in the night sky.  We no longer wander through the circus seeking distractions.  Now we are traveling for fulfillment.  We are seeing the world with new eyes.  New eyes that are open for the first time to the many doors of potential and opportunity that we missed when we were being distracted by the circus.

But I’ll tell you what hermits realize.  If you go off into a far, far forest and get very quiet, you’ll come to understand that you’re connected with everything 

  – Alan Watts

That is kind of what the movie City Slickers was about – those men had gone asleep to what was important in their lives.  They were living by distraction, not laser-like focus.  The meaning of life can be found in many things if we are awake and looking for it.  It tends to show up when we are out of our normal element.  Going off on a day trip to the mountains, the beach, the desert.  Away from the day to day of our life.  Away from the distractions that follow us around.

Be addicted to your passions, not your distractions.  

  – Unknown

It is when we can get quiet that a connection is possible.  We finally see the truths we have been avoiding with the distractions.  We discover that the thread of destiny in our life, is where the laser-like focus really begins to take shape.  That “thing” that we not so much latch on to, as it latches on to us.  We are pushed, pulled, and prodded until finally we realize that we have no choice – we have to live the life that brings our destiny into fulfillment.

Tomorrow becomes never.  No matter how small the task, take the first step now!

  – Tim Ferriss

If like the character in City Slickers you don’t know what that “one thing” is, go find it.  Go somewhere quiet without any of the normal distractions in your life.  Sit and think about your life.  Dig up all of your old dreams that you abandoned as not being possible when you failed the first time.  Reconnect with your passion, the thing that liberates your energy and your spirit.  The thing that inspires hope in you again.  When you find it, do everything in your power to stay connected.

In life, people tend to wait for the good things to come to them.  And by waiting, they miss out.

  – Neil Strauss

Let the circus roll on by.  Don’t stop for the Carmel Corn or the Hot Dog.  Don’t go on the rides, or play the games, or watch the circus clowns climb in and out of the clown car.  Keep your eyes on the stars, and not the passing ships lights.  Clarity, focus, making things happen.  That’s how you keep your  eyes on your stars.  Ignore the circus as it shouts to you about what it thinks is so important.  Once you understand your own destiny, your secret of life, don’t let that connection go.  Remember that the best view comes after the hardest climb.