I used to work for a company that owned hospitals and healthcare centers, doing accounting. The majority partner in the business would have the same order for lunch, every single day. A turkey sandwich with potato chips. Every single day, he ate the same lunch. They ordered lunch from TGIF, so it wasn’t like he didn’t have any other options.
I think many of us live in a rut. Stuck in a groove we can’t get out of, whether it’s our job, family drama or the little frustrations of everyday life. – Brian Pinkerton
I always wondered if he ate the same breakfast every morning, and the same dinner every evening. He was definitely a man stuck in a rut. Rush Limbaugh says that when you are in this experience, you “are out of contact with your own genius”. You have had this happen in your life at some point and time. The rut is a place of safety. You may have had a fear of the unknown, so the rut was a place of safety, because it is always the same. When you turn the page, who knows what might happen?
So what Zella is telling us, is that being in a rut, can actually be part of the journey – the point is once you recognize that you are stuck, then you can start going backwards, or forging ahead out of the rut. That you can blaze your own trail off the beaten path to your destination. That you can escape the rut. That you can get back in contact with your personal genius. This is because living your life on purpose through your personal genius, is when you know that you are home.
Changing a behavior is like driving down an old, rutted, dirt road. In order to get out of the rut and onto a new path, you need to jerk the wheel really hard. If you don’t jerk the wheel hard enough, you’ll just bounce right back on the same, old, rutted path. So for change to happen, hold on tight, jerk that wheel as hard as you can and get ready for a happy ride. Change is just beyond, on the other side. – Perfectharmonysolutions.com
When you listen to your personal genius, your souls voice, it leads you to amazing places. You find yourself living and doing things that previously you would only read about. Things that you could never imagine yourself doing. It is a conscious choice to listen to this voice that emanates from deep within.
We’ve all been there. The stress of moving your household. First packing then unpacking. It is exhausting, bad breaking labor. Or not? Maybe it’s a chance to play outside the box of go, go, go and instead find the joy in the moment. That is a totally inside job.
The choices that come from the outside are harder to deal with. The tragedy knocks you down and makes you a victim. Even the blessing, is a harder choice, because the blessing usually starts out like the tragedy. It becomes the blessing because you realize that you were stuck and needed your world turned upside down to shake you loose. The result of the blessing is that you took life’s lemons and made them into lemonade.
Being stuck in the past is like walking forward with your back facing front. You’ll always miss out on what’s in front of you. – thedailyquotes.com
How do you recognize that you are in a rut? One sign is reliving the past. It happens because you were comfortable there. You may complain about it, but you make no movement to actually change it. Another is repeating the past mistakes over and over again. Why do you repeat patterns of mistakes? Because you have convinced yourself that this time will be different. My mom was married five times, and every single man she married, she met in the bar that she was working in. One of the things that every single man had in common? They were all alcoholics. I remember telling her as a teenager, that maybe if she met men some place besides work, it might work out better?
You must learn a new way to think, before you can master a new way to be. – Marianne Williamson
This is how you get out of the rut. You don’t try to solve problems in your life with the same thinking that created them. You step up and out of the rut. And you begin blazing a new trail. So instead of stepping backward into the rut, step forward into growth. See where life is taking you. Listen to the voice of your soul, and wake up. Live your life with the intention to grow, live your life from your true reason and purpose for being here, and love your life with a passion that is on fire!
Life is too short to not follow your passion and purpose in your life. Passion and purpose are like the infinity loop, in that each one both feeds on and fuels the other. When they are working in tandem, there isn’t anything that you can’t accomplish. This is the space of the “high” where you feel invincible. Where everything just falls magically and magnetically into place. There is purpose in your searching, which is fueled by your passion. You search for the answers in response to the hunger that both drives and fuels your soul. It begins when you get the smallest glimpse of your true potential.
The meaning of life is to find your gift. The purpose of life is to give it away. – William Shakespeare
That time when you were a little child, and you saw someone doing something that just grabbed you, and you thought I want to be that or do that when I grow up. At that moment you saw your true potential. At some point fear of failure, or being told that you weren’t talented enough to be that or do that – something happens that puts a cork in your desire. You bottle it up. You bury it deep inside yourself, because you are embarrassed that you ever had that thought. Who did you think you were?
There comes a time when the need of releasing that cork from that bottle, cascades out of you like a river rushing to the sea. This need is a palpable thing. Your heart knows it needs to be released. Your instincts keep calling to you to release it. It keeps showing up no matter how we try to ignore it. It just continues to transform itself over and over again. It might show up at work one time, at your home life another. With a loss of a loved one. With the reconnection to an old friend. It might show up in your spiritual life. It keeps winding itself through your life, until you finally pay attention.
Do what you feel in your heart to be right – for you’ll be criticized anyway. – Eleanor Roosevelt
Within every life, the things that require transformation, are the pieces of misinformation that you have adopted in your life as being true. You probably don’t even know that they exist in your subconscious. For example; If your parents were divorced when you were a child, you may subconsciously feel that if you had been a better child, they would still be married. This might show up in your life with an intense desire to make everyone happy, to put yourself as last, to literally have the welcome mat on your face as people use you, and then leave you. You surrender and abandon your dreams.
You have convinced yourself that the problem is that you just aren’t giving enough of yourself away. If you just try harder you tell yourself, then you can make everyone else happy, and only then you will finally be happy. You keep that dream bottled up. You tell yourself that your vision of your true potential is unattainable. That you must settle. That whole story is a lie, a falsehood. That story needs to be transformed.
There will be places where your self sabotage shows up. Places where the shadow swings into action to stop you. Going around the bend of the river, you may get damned up by debris. Some busy beaver has blocked the flow and dammed up the river. This debris is all of the obligations that you have loaded upon yourself. The excuses, “I am too busy or don’t have the time” and “I have no money”, falls into this bucket.
The question comes up, what is behind the “but” excuse for you to follow your dream? You need to get curious. You need to start removing the debris, and figure out where it is coming from. Each of those sticks is tied to some false belief or assumption that you have to identify and then transform.
Recently there were newspaper headlines “Thames River now home to sharks, seals and sea horses, no longer biologically dead”. After years of cleaning up centuries of pollution, the river has come back to life. Just like cleaning up the Thames brought the river back to life, you need to “clean up your river” so that you can get back into flow with your passion and purpose, back into flow with your God given destiny.
The secret of change is to focus all of your energy, not on fighting the old, but on building the new. – Socrates
At places it may seem as though you are motionless, frozen in place. You have allowed the temporary artic blast from the nature of your fears, to freeze your river. It may seem like a solid block of ice, but deep beneath the surface, it is still flowing to the sea. It may have become a small dribble, but with the fires of your passion, you can melt the ice returning the river back into its full force.
Passion requires focused direction, and that direction must come from three other areas: your purpose, your talents, and your needs. – #sayquotable
Friends and family may try to sidetrack you, by diverting your river to their own benefit, but your need will find a way to get back on course.
At times we appear to be in flood stage, where the passion is so strong that you surrender to it. It is at these times that you learn to trust in divine providence to take you where you need to go. With the force of the floods, overflowing the course of the river, it will speed you past boulders that were blocking your path. Remember that all limitations, road blocks, and diversions are self imposed out of fear. Choose to leap forward over every obstacle as a challenge, that you have in fact already conquered.
Sometimes the best thing you can do is not think, not wonder, not imagine, not obsess. Just breathe, and have faith that everything will work out for the best. It is in that space between the breathing in and out, that brief space of holding, that you hear the voice of the divine. In this space you have the power to choose your response. Are you going to run from the challenge of having a mighty goal in your life? Are you going to deny your highest dreams and say that this is not your calling? Are you going to create a disaster by not having lofty ideals to strive for? Or are you going to reach for the stars, and really truly own that this starlight belongs to you and only you?
You are here not to shrink down less, but to blossom into more of who you really are. — Oprah
Gratitude is so important to happiness. Be thankful for what you are now, and keep fighting for what you want to be tomorrow – always shifting and transforming towards the magnificence that is buried deep inside. Everything changes, seasons come and go. You turn around and suddenly you find half the year is over.. Everything on this earth is in a continuous state of evolving, refining, improving, adapting, enhancing…, changing. You were not put on this earth to remain stagnant. You came here to reach certain goals. To fulfill certain dreams. To capture the highest ideal of who you are capable of being. You came here to not only reach the stars, but to reach beyond them.
“We can only be kept in the cages we refuse to see” – Stefan Molyneux
What cages have you freed yourself from, or are working on freeing yourself from?
These cages have been created from stories that we tell ourselves. Stories of our unworthiness and insecurities.
“The stories we tell ourselves shape our lives. They shape who we believe we are, and this belief translates into who we become.” – John Assaraf
Maybe you have totally different cages locked away in the darkness than I talk about below. What I do know, is that we all have cages, and we all have the keys to unlock them.
For many years I kept the real me hidden and locked away. I wanted people to love me, so I hid away all of the insecurities and made a strong mask to wear in public.
I was a daughter to a wonderful mom that I loved, but was always afraid that some day she wouldn’t love me, because I had not been the perfect daughter. This was my own story, not hers.
I am a sister, who has been more a mother to my younger sisters and brother, than a sister. I love them all dearly and wanted to protect them from all dangers, but I failed them. This was my own story, not theirs.
I worked myself up the corporate ladder of a major bank, becoming a “master” at mortgage finance and earning the title of Director. Yet at the same time, I was hiding away the insecurity of being found out to be a fraud. I was a high school drop out without a college degree. This was my story, and I release it, and release it, and release it (lack of formal education is a sticky belief for me).
I am a wife to my true love, my best friend, my partner. Through 48 years we have seen good times and bad. We have four wonderful children, and now have 14 grandchildren, and four great grandchildren. Many times I smiled on the outside and was dying on the inside, because I didn’t know how to communicate my own needs. So instead, became a martyr for everyone else’s. This was my story, not theirs.
I am a student of life. I am confident and unsure. I am terrified and excited. I am a young girl and an old woman. I wish on stars and dream dreams. I have been through many transformations, walking through the valley of fire and shadows. I have stepped off the edges of cliffs so I could soar across chasms. I have climbed up steep mountains, only to ride the rushing rivers back down into the valley.
I am just like you. A woman of many talents, conflicting emotions, and insecurities. I have set myself free from many of the stories I told myself. because the stories themselves were just cages to keep me contained. There are more cages that await, more doors to be opened. I have a handful of keys to the cages, and I am continuing to transform every time I use a new one.
“People only get really interesting when they start to rattle the bars of their cages.”– Alain De Bottom
Have you started rattling the bars of your cage? It starts with learning to love all of the parts of yourself. Letting go of the “I’m a Victim story”; the “The Villain story (either you or someone else)”; the “I am Helpless story”. It’s about noting what you are really feeling; how you are acting or reacting; and instead of creating some drama around it with you as the tragic victim, get back to the facts before your creative editing.
I have set myself free from the cages I created with the above false stories – the cage of perfection; the cage of protecting others from life experiences; and the cage of not having a degree; all of which were locked inside the larger cage of “I am not worthy” and so must earn your love and respect with every step, knowing that nothing I do can satiate that kind of thinking.
I love myself as I am today, perfectly imperfect. And, I love myself for who I am transforming into.
“I believe we write our own stories, and each time we think we know the end – we don’t. Perhaps luck exists somewhere between the world of planning, the world of chance, and in peace that comes from knowing that you just can’t know it all. You know, life’s funny that way. Once you let go of the wheel, you might end up right where you belong.” – quote bites.com
Women who run with wolves have discovered something about themselves, that allows them to leave behind the fear that is expressed because of going outside the comfort zone. See beauty in being able to walk alone or with the pack. Because you are unafraid, you may be called names by those who will fear you. Labels like defiant, incorrigible, impossible, wild and untamed by society. Wear these labels with pride.
When you live with fear, you will always be “Finding-Excuses-And-Reason
You don’t think that you have the courage; that you don’t deserve it; that you can’t have your cake and eat it too. You have bought into being small. Bought into not taking up a lot of space. Bought into being unworthy. It is not your true nature. It is not who you are deep in your heart. It is not who you are yearning to be. Do not become an endangered species. Do not muffle your soul for the sake of others.
For women who run with wolves, you have discovered S.E.L.F. which stands for Sacred-Empowered-Liberated-Self Care
She sees herself as a Sacred being
She sees herself as an Empowered being
She sees herself as a Liberated being
She sees herself as a Fearless being.
Her purpose is to remind others of their own sacred agreements they came here to fulfill. Of the love they have for each other. To free them from their self made chains and fulfill their own purpose in being here.
She knows that she can be grateful for each fear that is faced down and transformed into something wonderful. She is rejoicing because she is working with others out in the world to build a bridge to shift our world from the challenges we see happening today, into a place of unity, love and trust.
To fearless women, I am honored to be your sister.
Below is a copy of my poem which expresses these thoughts.
The wolf howls at the moon, not out of loneliness,
As he knows he is one with the universe.
He howls out of gratitude to be a member of the pack.
He remembers those he has traveled with in past lives,
He sees those he is traveling with again.
He rejoices in his vast community of souls, knowing that he is truly never alone.
The great spirit has honored the wolf with a voice that sings out in the darkness.
He honors the great spirit by singing to us,
“Do not be afraid, for you are not alone”
“I am here, and I remember you even if you have forgotten”.
Like the wolf I sing out to you, through my words on a page I say,
“I remember you, for we have traveled together before.”
I honor you that you have come again to do the great work before us.
Call out together with me as we gather our relatives that have forgotten their purpose.
Call to their minds our sacred agreement to meet at this time and place.
Whisper to them of the great love we have for each other and their hearts will remember.
Gather around as we build the bridge of knowledge and understanding.
This bridge will unite all peoples together in love
This bridge is shifting our world into a new age of unity, love and trust.
We are one,
One love, I love us
One trust, I trust us,
I honor our sacred agreements, I am here.
Face the fears that are keeping you locked out of your destiny. Unlock your cages and use those divine gifts with purpose to not only shift and change your world, but the entire world. Come and renew yourself. Find your voice and howl at the moon!
She who leaves a trail of glitter is never forgotten. Do you believe this about yourself and your life? Or do you think it only about someone else. Someone who is more beautiful, more intelligent, richer than you? Too many of us don’t even feel worthy to have the glitter, yet alone leave a trail of it for others to follow.
I just wish I hadn’t spent so much time worrying about not being someone else’s definition of enough. – Sophia Bush
So many of us come out of childhood thinking that we are not enough. Not enough to have our parents love us the way they should have. Not smart enough. Not talented enough (insert – don’t sing, don’t dance, don’t draw). Not pretty enough. The list is endless about how we are not enough, to be loved, accepted, to have our dreams become a reality.
Always know you are more than enough. You are precious, unique, and worth being adored, cherished and treasured! – Kandee Johnson
Try to say nothing negative about yourself for one hour, for one day, for one week, for one month. The longer you can maintain this test, the more amazing your life will become. It has been said that the biggest disease affecting humanity is “I am not enough”.
It is the driver of every act of self sabotage. When your mind thinks “I am not enough”, you will subconsciously self sabotage yourself out of anything that doesn’t affirm that lie.
Marissa Peer is a bestseller author, celebrity hypnotist and speaker. A lot of her focus is on helping people overcome this limiting belief to help them stop sabotaging their lives.
One of the things that she recommends is putting on your phone a timed text message stating “I am enough” and having it text you each morning and evening.
Write on the mirrors in your home, especially in your bathroom and carry around a piece of paper to remind you
So think about your language and how often do you say things like –
What is that something about yourself? That quality you think is missing? That place where you don’t think you are enough?
When you get praise, how often do you reject praise, and you add in a piece of criticism? “That is a beautiful outfit you have on today”, and you say – “this old thing, it makes me look fat”. Even scarier, do your sons and daughters say these things about themselves? When they are 1, 2 or 3 years old we celebrated that they took their first step, their first word, the first time they went potty in the potty chair. But there comes a time when they start school and they start being compared to others. Now they are experiencing the “not enough” and they start believing it.
The fear of not getting the reward becomes the fear of rejection. The fear of not being good enough. . . is what makes us try to change, what makes us create an image. – Miguel Angel Ruiz
The book, “The Four Agreements” by Miguel Angel Ruiz is a wonderful book that teaches you about the masks that you began wearing when you were children. You will wear these masks all of your life, if you don’t learn how to remove them. You need to be who you truly are, without the fear of rejection and not being enough. Turn it around for yourself, for your children. Learn to accept praise without feeling unworthy. Hear the words you say about yourself, and change them when they are downgrading or demeaning. I always wanted my mother to say I did a good job – I made it a point to say to my children that they did a good job.
Lie to your brain, cheat your fear, and steal back your life of “I am more than enough” feeling that you had as a very young child.
Win as if you were used to it, lose as if you enjoyed it for a change.
– Ralph Waldo Emerson
At some point in our childhood we start looking at trying and failing, as being a loser, because we did not do it perfectly the first time we tried. A baby learns how to roll over; then crawl; then walk. A baby learns how to say words. Think of any 1 – 2 year old and they do not pronounce each word perfectly. I remember my boys saying truck, but the “T” blended with the “R” sounded like an “F” and peoples heads would turn when they said the word, like they were swearing. My boys didn’t decide that because they couldn’t say the word perfectly the first time, that they would never attempt to say the word again. A baby who stands up for the first time and then plops back down on their bum doesn’t decide that crawling is safer, so that is all they are going to do forever.
If you believe the doubts in your mind you won’t achieve the dreams in your heart.
– Marinela Reka
A girlfriend and I were discussing this, and I thought that it must have something to do with peer pressure. When we enter daycare or some other classroom experience and discover that some kids can do things better than we can. At some point the comparison starts shutting us down. We don’t want to risk the possibility of being wrong, so we don’t raise our hands when the teacher asks the class a question. We put a label on not being perfect, as being a total failure. In our minds we see kids with mean faces, laughing at us. Or maybe we see our parents or teachers telling us that we are just stupid or dumb. That we can’t learn anything. That we will never be anything.
Failure is not the opposite of success; it’s a stepping stone to success.
– Elli Stassinopoulos
What if we were to consciously try to change that meaning in our own head. What if failure is part of success and something to be enjoyed? Just as much as we celebrate crossing the finish line in a race as the winner, we were to celebrate crossing the finish line even 1 second faster than we had before, even if it was 100th place in the race?
Winston Churchill had that kind of thinking. I think that if he had been of a different mentality, WWII for England might have turned out differently. One of my favorite quotes of his –
Success is going from failure to failure without a loss of enthusiasm.
– Winston Churchill
The reality of the situation is that each time we try something new, it is going to be full of things that we can do differently to be more successful the next time. They say that it takes 10,000 hours to become a master of something. So each time we do it, we are a little more successful. We can look at what happened and determine what we can shift, take out, put it, tweak the next time to make it even better.
What makes someone talented successful? Michael Jordon summed it up with,
I’ve never been afraid to fail.
– Michael Jordon
We have to be willing to take the leap of faith off the cliff. We may not land perfectly, but when we replay it in our mind, we can determine what we did, and what we can change. Then we can go back up to the top and try it again.
If you’re not prepared to be wrong, you’ll never come up with anything original.
– Ken Robinson
Everything can be improved. 10,000 tries allows for an awful lot of improvements, step by step. Step by step, we place each thing that didn’t work as the stones that we step on as we try it one more time. Failures are part of the process of living a life that is worth living. It is how we grow, by changing something and trying something new. True success can only come from doing something new, failing at it and doing it again, just differently.
Never let success get to your head, and never let failure get to your heart.
Like the irritation to the oyster, which gets coated over and over again, each new thing we learn becomes a pearl of priceless beauty. Can you look back at your life and say thank you, for the mistakes you made that taught you to laugh at yourself? Those stories that felt painful at the time. Now they are the funniest stories that you and your friends tell each other. It always starts with, “Remember when I . . . ” and then ends with laughter.
Don’t worry about failures, worry about the chances you miss when you don’t even try.
– Jack Canfield
How many opportunities in our life have we walked past, because we were afraid to try? There is nothing worse than a life that you didn’t even try to live. That is where the true regrets in your life come from. The things you did not do.
Love this quote (which didn’t have who wrote it, so unknown)
I AM STRONG
because I know my Weaknesses
I AM BEAUTIFUL
because I am aware of my Flaws
I AM FEARLESS
because I learnt to recognize, illusion from Real
I AM WISE
because I learn from my Mistakes
I AM A LOVER
because I have felt Hate
and . . . ,
I CAN LAUGH
because I have known Sadness
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What’s life without a little risk?
– J.K. Rowling
Life is about taking risks. Every choice is in reality a risk. A risk of achieving something great and wonderful; a risk of failure; a risk of not doing or doing the right thing. The great secret of the phrase, “taking a risk”, is that no matter what happens, we get something wonderful. If we take a risk and it turns out just like we wanted, we are happy. If we take a risk, and it doesn’t turn out well, we still have something wonderful from the experience, we have knowledge, experience, and the combination of those two things is wisdom. We can then look at what we tried to do, remove a piece, tinker with it, add something new and try again. The only way to truly fail, is to do nothing, to risk nothing.
And then there is the most dangerous risk of all – the risk of spending your life not doing what you want on the bet you can buy yourself the freedom to do it later.
– Randy Komisar
Being wise beyond our fears, means recognizing that the true directions of the heart, require no words. There is simply a knowing inside. It just feels better, when we go in the direction of the heart. When you make the decision based on the hearts guidance, you feel the weight of the decision slide off your shoulders. There is no second guessing.
To live your greatest life, you must first become a leader within yourself. Take charge of your life. Begin attracting and manifesting all that you desire in life.
– Sonia Ricotti
When you say the words out loud, that only your soul has dared to whisper to the heart, that is when miracles happen. The declaration, both verbal and written gives notice to the divine that you are listening. Listen to your dreams. That is when you open to the unexpected, and miracles happen. When your mind and heart is too filled with the worlds noise, your dreams may be the only way that your souls whisper can be heard by the heart.
Let your heart be your guide on all things, but you have to listen closely because it speaks so softly.
– John St. Augustine
Each whisper of the soul to your heart speaks of the next leg of your journey. There are times on your journey when experience and reason tell you not to follow that path. Your mind sees the risks and wants to play it safe. But you have to give it a try. I’ve always loved the play on words – when you find yourself “now here” instead of “no where” is that moment of just being. That moment of space of being fully conscious, because you have to be fully conscious to hear the whispers of your heart.
Sometimes, you find yourself in the middle of nowhere, and sometimes, in the middle of nowhere, you find yourself.
When you don’t listen to the whispers of the soul to your heart, sooner or later, that whisper turns into a scream. When the whisper has turned to screaming in desperation, it is usually a sign that your life is about to shift into some sort of test. This comes about because instead of listening to your own heart, you are playing it safe. Playing it safe, is being a diamond in the ruff. A raw diamond looks a lot like common quartz, it is cloudy looking.. But cut it perfectly and shine it up, and everyone knows it is a diamond. We all have these exceptional qualities and potential. But we are afraid to stand out from the crowd, and so we hide ourselves, even from ourselves. Everybody wants to be a diamond, but very few are willing to get cut.
Take risks in your life. If you win, you can lead. If you lose, you can guide.
– Swami Vivekananda
It is so easy to become focused on others instead of ourselves. We get pushed and pulled in all directions by our work, our friends and our families. When those that we are surrounded by see us listening to our heart, they get scared. Changes that you make in your life, will impact theirs. They are afraid of many things, but primarily that you may out grown them. That you will leave them behind.
The only difference between fear and excitement is your attitude about it.
Don’t let their fears break your soul. They may try to expose your shadows, your imperfections, the things that lurk inside of you with feelings of shame or guilt. They are just trying to stop you from listening to the heart. God has put into our hearts, an intuitive guidance system to guide us to what we need, the next step on our path. Follow that guidance. When you do, you will know it because your heart will be at peace. Even the most painful and difficult decisions are correct, if the heart is at peace with it.
Take charge of your choices. Choose to look up, when life presses you down. Choose to smile, when life frowns at you. Choose victory, over defeat.
Be wise beyond your fears ,and keep heading towards your glorious destiny. If the dream keeps reappearing in your thoughts, go for it. That is destiny calling you and it is always worth the price of admission.
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The devil whispered in my ear, “you’re not strong enough to withstand the storm.” Today I whispered in the devil’s ear, “I am the storm”.
We are all stronger than we know or think we are. I come from a long line of strong pioneer women. My great, great grandmother came across the Oregon Trail as a young girl. The wagon train that her adopted family was part of was attacked by Indians. She was adopted by the tribe and given to an Indian brave that she had two girls with. One day a French Canadian trapper saw her and offered to take her back to the white people. My great grandmother was hidden in an oak barrel for two days scared that if she made a sound she would be killed. When she reached Oregon and the white people my great grandmother suffered the prejudice of being a half breed. Her mothers tale was one of rescue, her tale was something else.
In my own life, my parents were divorced when I was four because my mother had an affair and became pregnant with another married mans child. She moved us around a lot and it wasn’t until I was in high school that I went to the same school the entire grade. She was married five times and had numerous other relationships looking for something outside of herself, to fill the hole within. At one point when I was thirteen years old we were homeless because we had no where to go when her current relationship failed. That was when I knew that my life would be different. She taught me that you couldn’t find anything outside of yourself to fill the need you had inside. It had to come from within. Even though she made a lot of bad decisions, she was the strongest woman I have ever known. I come from a long line of strong women. This is what they taught me:
Above all, be the heroine of your life, not the victim.
– Nora Ephron
Strong women know that sometimes we just need to sit with the questions until a direction is clearly revealed.
Strong women can sit with another woman in the silence without needing to say anything to break the tension.
Strong women know that when another woman is venting she doesn’t want anything to be fixed, she just needs someone there to witness the removal of the splinter that is causing her pain.
Strong women know that they must make their own light. And if as it sometimes happens that their light goes out, another sister will be there to share hers, until we are strong enough to relight our own.
Strong women know that when the light goes out, we are facing the day, when we question everything. When something so tragic happens that all of our foundations crash into dust.
This is the day when we all circle around our sister as she faces her crisis of faith and reveals the doubts which will birth a new creation. This is the day when we nurture her. When each sister holds the soul of the other ,and whispers the words of transformation.
This is the day of transformation which strips away the old way of being. Rising like a phoenix from the fire, we are reborn, fully transformed.
No longer trying to be what others want us to be, we accept “us” without reservations or restrictions.
Strong women know that when you stand strong for yourself, you are standing strong for all of us. When this belief is fully understood and lived, incredible things happen.
We value who we are, no matter what anyone else thinks.
We forgive ourselves completely.
We trust ourselves wholeheartedly.
We are brave enough to love ourselves just as we are, perfectly imperfect.
We empower ourselves to fully embrace our intuition.
We begin to live our life being the wonderful creation we are.
We fully realize the power of being a goddess, and that nothing can hurt us or stop us, except us.
A strong women doesn’t hold back either the laughter or the tears, because both cleanse the soul.
A strong women doesn’t apologize for knowing how to be both soft and powerful.
A strong women in her essence, her entelechy, is a gift to herself, to her tribe, and to the world.
I choose to be kind because it makes me happy. But I will defend my boundaries and my loved ones without hesitation. Make no mistake: I am fierce.
– Nanea Hoffman
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The Spiritual Journey is the unlearning of fear and the acceptance of Love
– Marianne Williamson
Taking action with the collaboration of your life purpose and your personal genius together, is part of being able to listen to your souls voice. This unique collaboration forms your souls fingerprint. When you can see yourself from the souls perspective, you remember what your life’s purpose is. You remember why you came to the earth. Your personal genius is the gift(s) that God gave you to accomplish your life’s purpose with. There is no one else in the world with your unique gifts and skills.
Maybe the journey isn’t so much about becoming anything. Maybe it’s about unbecoming everything that isn’t really you so you can be who were meant to be in the first place.
Your soul has been speaking to you through your heart since you were conceived. You may in fact remember it from when you were a child, before someone convinced you not to listen to it. They put you asleep, so that you wouldn’t hear it. You woke up the moment that you decided that you were not going to allow your soul to be insulted any longer. When you decided to stop listening to those lies, and accepted that you are a divine gift to this world. You decided to stop just existing, you decided to start participating in life.
The only limits you have are the limits you believe.
– Wayne Dyer
It is when this desire to fully live our lives awakens that we start to seek out more knowledge. Many people will use prayer or meditation as a part of this process. It helps to quiet the mind, so that the soul can be heard. Have you ever had a thought or a dream about something that came true? Have you ever thought about someone and then within minutes they called? Have you ever had “Deja Vu”, that deep feeling that you have experienced something before, when you know that it has never happened before? These are all soul communications. Every experience adds to your personal growth. We begin to release all of the false beliefs that held us in cages. We remove the barriers of judgment of those different from us, that kept people distant. We become curious.
The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched, they must be felt with the heart.
– Helen Keller
Now that you are conscious, your souls strong voice can lead you in your journey of transformation. We are all born to be leaders, but sometimes we let life’s obstacles beat us down. We need to learn to be resilient, and then help others to be resilient. What we learn is to stop trying to make things happen in a certain way that our mind has made up, and instead to let things unfold as they are supposed to. We realize that we are on a divine timetable, not a human one. We start to feel the connections to everyone and everything. There are lessons for us if we are willing to be still and watch them unfold in others peoples lives. We see their troubles, their life patterns, their special gifts of the spirit. When we can truly sift away all of the static of judgment away, we see them as God meant them to be. It is so uplifting to see that, to be in that space. It encourages us to try to be what God meant for us to be.
I think a spiritual journey is not so much a journey of discovery. It’s a journey of recovery. It’s a journey of uncovering your own inner nature. It’s already there.
– Billy Corgan
Instead of being afraid and running our life from fears, we start shifting into that space of love more often. We let the negative emotions pass through us with less hindrance. We find that anger at the crazy or distracted driver ahead us sort of passes by like a cloud on a breezy summer day. We are not seeking out conflict with others. Those feelings of unrest and frustration that used to gather like a summer storm with thunder and lightning just break apart and disappear over the horizon. We suddenly realize that those tiny frustrations with the kids, our spouse, that person who has the noisy habits at work – we suddenly realize that those negative emotions are less and less. It is like the pressure that they were building up inside of us is just no longer there. The itchy spot no longer is red, swollen, or angry looking. It has faded away.
Spirituality can not be defined, but can be described as a journey to the center of the soul.
– Perter Kemmsies
This doesn’t mean that we don’t have those days when we want to explode. It is just that our attention is no longer constantly being grabbed by it. We find ourselves dwelling more and more in the positive emotional vibrations. We are all born to love everyone we meet. Then fear is introduced to us, and we start being afraid of being hurt, being judged, being less than someone else. So we protectively do that to others, to protect ourselves. A spiritual awakening, or consciousness is stripping away those multitude of fears and putting the acceptance of love back into its place. This is truly living in reality, because our journey has been to lead us back home to our purpose in being here now.
As with any journey, who you travel with can be more important than your destination.
The world has been waiting for you. You are a catalyst to help others wake up, and become conscious of their life’s purpose. To help them take action themselves.
We are spiritual beings on a physical journey . . . There are no limitations, other than those that we impose upon ourselves. Mastery is within our power – if we wish it to be.
– Susan Barbara Apollon
This day, let us begin to live our purpose with passion, and give our sacred gifts to the world.
The world we see that seems so insane is the result of a belief system that is not working. To perceive the world differently, we must be willing to change our belief system, let the past slip away, expand our sense of now, and dissolve the fear in our minds.
– William James
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“Alice: How long is forever?
White Rabbit: Sometimes, just one second”
– Lewis Carroll
Life seems like that sometimes. I remember years ago that we were driving north on I-5 in Oregon and we had just crested the top of a hill around Roseberg. You could see quite a way in front of you as the road sloped down into a valley. Ahead of us was a semi-tractor trailer and he ran over something that looked like shiny metal in the road. Immediately his tires blew and he started swerving and then the whole rig tipped onto its side.
For a moment it was like slow motion. I could see so many small details as the whole scene played out like a movie. Then whoosh, time sped back up and my husband was pulling off the road and running back to make sure the driver was ok. The driver was just shocked by what had happened. But for me, it was the weirdest experience of time I have ever had. It was like the rabbit said, forever came in just one second.
“I can’t go back to yesterday because I was a different person then” – Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland
In order to embrace change, you need a great deal of courage. Change in your life today is speeding up, faster and faster. This speed of change is impacting every facet of your life. It changes the education system, the business world, and your personal life.
I saw a cute video the other day where the family was in a hotel room and the dad handed the telephone receiver to his young daughter to hang it up. She didn’t know what to do. All she had experience with was a cell phone. She didn’t understand the receiver had to go onto the cradle of the phone.
Technology changes your world moment by moment. Political upheaval can change all of the rules you live by in a moment. Your belief systems can swing from one absolute truth, to a new absolute truth. It takes a lot of courage to stay in that place of curiosity . To not become mired into taking rigid stands against someone whose belief is different from yours.
It takes a lot of courage to change beliefs that you have had for a long time. It could be that you have to finally acknowledge that you have outgrown them. Or it could be that science, technology, and even a simple virus has totally changed the world as you know it.
It takes a lot of courage to have a love affair with the unknown. It means that you are constantly learning something new. Each new thing demands that we let go of an old belief. You may think like Alice “this is impossible” but as the Mad Hatter replied, “Only if you think it is.” My favorite line is “Why, sometimes I’ve believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast.”
“May I have the courage today to live the life that I would love. To postpone my dream no longer. But do at last what I came here for and waste my heart on fear no more” – John O’Donohue
Transformation was a big topic in the story. One pill made her smaller, Cake made her larger. The Cheshire Cat became invisible. Animals can talk. You can kill the Jabberwocky.
Nothing remained the same for long in Wonderland. It feels like right now that we are all walking through Wonderland. The world is shifting day by day, and no one knows what to expect to have happened at the end of the day. Are you approaching the madness with curiosity? With courage?
I think that the most interesting thing about curiosity is that it hides something most of us are afraid of admitting. It cloaks your ignorance about something or someone. Most of us wouldn’t want to admit we don’t know something. But we aren’t afraid of being curious.
Being curious is a great gift. At the moment that you use this gift –
It took me years to find the magic of self transformation. Each transformation I go through, awakens me a little more. It is a personal and sacred journey each time. Each time I get curious about something, I know that my soul is sending me a new message to wake up. It’s time to make another transformation, another change, another shift in my life.
I survived because the fire inside me burned brighter than the fire around me.
– Joshua Graham
I now know that I no longer have to walk through the dark night of the soul, to transform my life. I think about the experiences in my past, and what I learned going through each experience of death and rebirth. It is the death of something that needs to be released, something that no longer serves me but rather belongs to the old sleepwalking me. It is the rebirth of the real me. The parts of me that I hid deep within. It could be something about myself that I disowned as a child. It could be the dream that I was told wasn’t possible coming back to life. It is the realization that I am whatever I choose to become.
I realized that strong souls are forged living through the fires of hell. That the fire itself is healing, The fires may feel like they are consuming us, but they are refining us. They burn off the false truths that we cling to. Like false messiahs they promised they would keep us afloat, but it was all illusion. They were shown to be false prophets of our subconscious, seeking to keep our souls bound, unmoving in chains. The fires consume the false beliefs, freeing our souls rise up from the ashes like the phoenix. We rise up with wings of faith and soar into a brightly shining divine destiny.
What matters most is how well you walk through the fire.
– Charles Bukowski
While I prefer to live the rest of my life, proactively seeking transformation, I can still honor the forges of hell for the deep truths that they provided. I am climbing up to the top of the next mountain summit, to view the next horizon of transformation. Within each new transformation, there is a pattern that reappears in every persons life. This pattern weaves itself through the tapestry of our life. In one corner we have the scene of our home and family life. In another section of the tapestry we find our employment or career. In another scene we see the health of our physical body, while another reflects the health of our spiritual body.
In all these scenes there is a common thread that winds through. For myself, for years it was the fear of being seen. What is so interesting is that I discovered this thread came from my mother and was actually her own pattern. When I realized that it didn’t belong to me, it was as though the thread dissolved, and could no longer be located in my life tapestry. We all have threads in our tapestry that don’t belong to us. They belong to friends and family. We need to pull and release these threads back to their true owners.
Other common threads or patterns in the tapestry are my own. My fears, which hold me back. They are like the loose hairs that thread and wind themselves into your laundry. The fears wind around and through the patterns of the cloth. Have you ever taken a item of clothing out of the dryer only to find stray hairs wound into the fabric of your clothes? It isn’t part of the material, but it somehow has wound itself into the material. When you pull on it, it will break, but it is really hard to get all of the hair out of the material. That is what these patterns of fear are like. We pull at them, and break them up. But there always seems to be a part of them still there.
I have a need to be all on fire, for I have mountains of ice about me to melt.
– William Lloyd Garrison
There are also “not enough” threads which are the spaces were the material creates these little pills – the thread gathers into these little knobs, which affect the look of the item. They are formed from abrasions in day to day life. Places where we felt judged, not appreciated, ill-used. These “not enough” threads get created from stories we have told ourselves all of our lives. These stories, although we would swear are true, are in fact illusions. When we get curious and start examining why we are rubbing our life the wrong way, we are able to shift these stories. When patterns are broken, we transform the chaos into new beliefs. Beliefs of being strong minded; strong souled; strong bodied; and strong hearted. An awakened soul.
The most beautiful people I’ve known are those who have known trials, have known struggles, have known loss, and have found their way out of the depths.
– Elisabeth Kubler-Ross
The reason people awaken when they do, is because they have finally stopped agreeing to things that insult their soul. They wake up to the fact that they are no longer owned by the desires outside the body, but have awakened to their true nature. Their heart is on fire, and they burn off the chains that have been holding them in place.
Be true to life by being true to your purpose. As you become present and thereby total in what you do, your actions become charged with spiritual power.
– Eckhart Tolle
We are in fact spiritual beings, that are awakening to our purpose in becoming human. We turn inward to remember why we are here and what we came to do.
Go, knock at the door of your own heart.
That is where you start looking for your answers. Enlightenment is a destructive process because we have to let go of things, stories really, that we have told our sleeping selves were true. With each awakening we leave behind something or someone. It takes courage to tear down the stone walls that we built to keep ourselves asleep. Those stones were hidden deep within us, like unseen anchors they held us in place. With enlightenment, we begin cutting through the iron chains with a sacred energy that comes through our divine connection. Heating up the links until they snap apart, setting us free.
It takes courage to endure the sharp pains of self discovery, rather than choose to take the dull pain of unconsciousness that would last the rest of our lives.
– Marianne Williamson
By realizing who we are at our deepest level, we find our personal genius. That unique gift that the divine gave us, is like the fingerprint of our soul. No one else has the same personal genius that we have. Each personal genius is required to fulfill their life purpose and ignite their passions into action. We are all like individual puzzle pieces sent to the earth to fulfill a divine purpose. That we why some of us feel the force of Rumi’s words, “do not go back to sleep.” Because the world is waiting on each of us to fulfill our divine purpose.
This Universe is not outside of you. Look inside yourself; everything that you want, you already are.
Transformation, is a process. If we fail to involve all of the steps in the process, what we end up with is temporary change. We change for a few weeks, or maybe a few months, but eventually the rubber band of will power will snap and we will return to the previous habits and lifestyle. Change is temporary. Transformation is required to truly shift our life, our DNA, into a totally new being. With each one of us that awakens, our gifts bring us one step closer to universal peace and harmony.
Behind the mask of ice that people wear, there beats a heart of fire.
– Paulo Coelho
So be curious, and take that first step down the path to awaken. Then be curious and take the next step to enlightenment. Then be curious and take the next step to transformation. Then be curious and take the next step to the next horizon. Then be curious and awaken just a little more. Get curious and become even more enlightened and transformed again and again.
The meaning of life is to find your gift, the purpose of life is to give it away.
– Joy J Golliver
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“Refuse to be an extraordinary person trapped in an ordinary life” – Zaro Dean
A little step can be the first step in the beginning of a great journey. Live a life that is a story worth telling. I heard one of those kinds of stories recently. The storyteller had me laughing so hard throughout his story. It was the story of how one day when he was having a bath, he wondered if anyone had ever rowed a bathtub across the English Channel. Now you might think that this kind of dream is very silly, I know I did. But as he told it I was simply amazed.
They say that in an average lifetime we spend six years dreaming. How many of those dreams have you brought into reality? How many have you made even a small effort to bring into reality? Tim Fitzhigham and his story is remarkable, because he made a really crazy dream come into reality. Just think what you could accomplish if you put in half of the effort that he did?
It helps that as part of his career he is a comedian. So, he didn’t take himself too seriously. Now as you may or may not know, a man by the name of Thomas Crapper was an inventor of the toilet. Hence the reason why his last name is very famous. Tim first went searching for someone to donate an appropriate bathtub to row across the channel and the company Thomas Crapper and Co Ltd donated a copper Victorian style bathtub to which he attached a kind of pedestal.
Next he had to learn to row a boat. Then he had to request permission to sail across the channel from both Britain and France. The British thought it was a fine idea, the French not so much. They actually made an amendment to their law to prohibit sailing bathtubs across the channel. Tim was successful in getting the British Navy to make his bathtub a registered boat, so that he was now in compliance with French law.
Now what is really amazing is that in getting all of this accomplished Tim talked to British Rear Admirals and even the Queen of England to make sure that he could in fact sail his bathtub across. He tells his story on the British equivalent of a TED talk and it is really, really funny.
The French tried to remove him from his boat partway across the channel and to blow it up. He told them that since his bathtub was a registered boat, and he was the captain of said boat, that doing so without his permission would constitute an act of war. Since it was true, they had to leave him with his boat.
He didn’t make it due to an injury on his first try, but he did make it upon the second try. He raised 20,000 pounds for a charity, and you can hear him tell his story on The Moth Radio Hour on NPR entitled, “All At Sea”.
What I loved about his story is that he is making his life extraordinary. He received a Royal Navy Commission, he met the Queen, he has written a book about his journey and received international stardom. All because he came up with a crazy idea and then made it happen.
Probably over 95% of you would never have set out to do something so crazy. You would have never believed that any government official would give you the permission. You wouldn’t have reached out to the Navy or the Queen of England. You would have thought, “they will think I am crazy” and not even picked up the phone. They probably did think he was crazy, but the thing is, they supported him anyway.
How many really good ideas have you thought of that you could do, but you let yourself be talked out of it. You told yourself who am I to do this thing? You listened to close friends and relatives that asked you “what are you thinking? Are you crazy?” And so, you let the dream die before it even had a chance to breathe.
Those of you who do reach out to try the crazy idea, usually do so because of a personal crisis in your life. It may be like me that someone close to you was murdered. Or it could be like Candy Lightner, the founder of MADD that your child or husband was killed by a drunk driver. Or it could be like the Susan Komen Foundation that you lost your daughter or wife to breast cancer and set out to find a cure, so that no one else loses a loved one to that dreaded disease.
It could be that because of an accident you were told you would never walk again and be in a wheelchair for the rest of your life. But you decided that would not be your fate and through hard work and determination you found your way to leave the wheelchair behind. It could be that now you are working to help others regain their mobility, whether it is physical, mental or emotional trauma that must be overcome.
Most of you are not quite as crazy as Tim, but you still have the crazy idea that you can make a difference in the world, by transforming your pain into something positive.
I really loved Robin Williams as the professor in Dead Poets Society. I loved the quote that the purpose of education is supposed to help our youth learn to think for themselves, not just recite rote answers. That they should seize the day and make their lives extraordinary.
We need more extraordinary people in our world, because those are the kinds of people that make things happen. They seize the dream out of their hearts, and they keep trying. They realize that even the mistakes they will make along the way can be something wonderful.
So go out today and find your bathtub moment. The crazy idea that you can bring into reality. Like Tim you might find that your crazy idea can be done, and along the way you might just meet the Queen of England and get a Royal Navy Commission. Who knows what just might be possible?