Will 2022 Be The Year Your Dreams Become Reality?

 

Updated 11/14/2021

We are just about 1 1/2 months until the new year.  It is the perfect time to do a year end review of 2021.  Did you make some new years resolutions, goals, plans for 2021?  How did you grow and make progress, and what have you overcome in this year?

Some people will make goals that are giving something up for a limited time or forever.  Lent is a religious practice that does this.

Some people will make goals to bring something new into their life.

What you discover every single year is that change is hard.  And if that change is motivated by will power alone, it will not last.

“In order to save myself, I must destroy first the me I was told to be” – The Dreamer

So how are you doing on those goals, plans and intentions to change?

What is your definition of progress?

Having 20/20 vision means that you have done the work to see the connections to what you have decided to change and where you are going with your dreams in this new year.  You have spent the time to map out the new year so that you can make some actual progress towards those dreams, instead of letting fears and excuses stall your journey.

“Maybe the journey isn’t so much about becoming anything. Maybe it’s about unbecoming everything that isn’t really you, so you can be who you were meant to be in the first place” – Unknown

Instead of hiding who you are, be bold and step out into the world proclaiming “I am here”.  Stop hiding your dreams, thinking that way no one can destroy them any further. Learn to trust your heart and listen to it. Give up on settling for what is possible, and demand your part in the dance of life.

“Ten years from now, make sure you can say that you chose your life, you didn’t settle for it” – Unknown

There is only one way to truly know who you are deep down inside. You have to get in touch with your own soul. You need to be by yourself, and sit with yourself, and just listen. Looking back at your life, find the places where you were really happy. Find the things that are so easy for you to do, that others find hard or impossible. Trace back all of the threads that have your name engraved upon them. Start picking out and removing all of the threads that are not you. Look for the gold and silver pieces and toss out the dross. Now look for the patterns that are left.

It is never too late to be who you were meant to be

The threads of genius that are all you, can now be taken up and made into whatever pattern you want. It is never too late to be who you were meant to be.  When you make this journey deep into your soul, you will discover that your life can only change by completely shaking it up.   You need to remove what doesn’t belong and then figure out how to rearrange what does. It is an individual journey that defines who you are. You can only discover your truth by looking for it down deep within and then integrating it into your life. 20/20 vision is a lifetime adventure. This journey is for you alone. Embrace it and live it fully.

“To make the right choices in life, you have to get in touch with your soul. To do this, you need to experience solitude, which most people are afraid of, because in the silence you hear the truth and know the solutions.” – Deepak Chopra

So, how do you make this the year that you transform your life?  You do it by finding the pattern that you fit into.  If you were to read everything about changing your life with new years resolutions, goals and plans that has been published just this month you might find it overwhelming.  Everyone has different ideas about what works.  What they really mean is what worked for them.

It’s an individual journey, one size does not fit all

What I have found is that it is really all about making the connections to what I am taking away or adding to my life purpose.  I pick what sounds right deep inside of me and leave the rest behind.  When I do this, it becomes an infinity loop of expanding energy to keep doing the work.  I want to share this process with you, so that you too can be like Goldilocks and find the pieces that fit just right.

“The spiritual journey is individual, highly personal. It can’t be organized or regulated. It isn’t true that everyone should follow one path. Listen to your own truth” – Ram Dass

It’s an individual journey and one size does not fit all.  Making your dream a reality isn’t easy.  It is sort of like having a puzzle that has the same picture that others have, but your puzzle pieces are cut slightly different.  You are missing some pieces and so you discover that they are not inter-changeable.  Some pieces might fit, but others won’t.  So you have to go to a lot of different puzzles to find the missing pieces that will fit.  It’s a risk because each piece that doesn’t really fit, becomes a failure on your part.

“. . . it’s a life’s journey of finding ourselves, finding our power, and living for yourself, not for everyone else . . . ” – Mariska Hargitay

If you don’t take the risks, make the changes and transform your life, then your destiny will not be fulfilled.   In order to make this a little easier I would love to share with you what I have found.  It’s a method of taking bits and pieces from all different methods of change and transformation and creating a pattern that allows me to plug in things that work for me.

You decide what methods of change work for you

This isn’t just about a vision board or an accountability partner.  It isn’t just about will power or a positive attitude.  Make 2022 be the year that you don’t get overwhelmed and quit.  That this time frustration doesn’t get you stuck in the mud of “it’s just isn’t working” and you give up.  It’s about getting past the negative mind talk and making real progress towards your dreams.  It is about getting on the road of good intentions and actually getting somewhere.

• You discover for yourself the answers to the questions you didn’t know you were asking.
• You look into your soul for your own individual answers, your threads.
• You discern if the puzzle piece fits exactly or not.
• You take what belongs and leave the rest behind.

What I know for sure is that we all hit walls of failure, fatigue, and flat tires. It helps to have a few tricks up your sleeves to handle them.  Then they just create slowdowns and maybe a few detours, but don’t stop you completely.

Make this your year of shift, change and transformation.  Get 2022 vision, insight and find your missing puzzle pieces.  Complete your own puzzle and see the full picture of who you are becoming.

Don’t Let Something Amazing Pass You By

“Sometimes, thing don’t go as planned.  Life doesn’t always go the way you hope it will.  You can’t plan everything.  Life takes you where it wants to – you’re pretty much just along for the ride!  Just breathe – Re-Evaluate – Step out of the box – Forgive – Be grateful.”  – Namala Lakesh

I believe in plans.  But I also believe in being flexible.  I believe in taking stock and making constant adjustments.  It’s like a sailboat.  You are subject to winds and currents, but with the rudder and sails, you have the ability to maneuver into the direction you want to go.  Which is why I love the way I plan out my month and year.  I make plans and then as life happens I see where I need to make adjustments.  To re-evaluate what is really most important in the current time and space to accomplish.  That’s why I am sharing this system with all of you.  It works!

“She stood in the storm and when the wind did not blow her away, she adjusted her sails.”  – Elizabeth Edwards

Sometimes things happen in the reverse order of your expectations.  The patience comes in because you automatically put expectations on the plans.  You visualize them out step by step, and then life happens.  You lose you job, the promised promotion and/or raise doesn’t materialize.  Someone close to you is faced with a critical medical diagnosis.  The money you had planned for vacation now has to go to put in new plumbing.  In short, life happens.  You need to adjust your sails.

“Obstacles don’t have to stop you.  If you run into a wall, don’t turn around and give up.  Figure out how to climb it, go through it, or work around it.”  – Michael Jordan

Sometimes obstacles are like the monsters under the bed.  You hear a noise.  Your imagination runs wild.  Your heartbeat goes out of control.  Suddenly you are screaming.  And it was all in your head.  Other times they are legitimate.  I remember one of the contestants in America’s Got Talent had been a singer, then tragedy struck.  She went deaf from a medical condition.  She stopped singing and gave up her career.

“Our life doesn’t always turn out the way we planned, but sometimes that’s because what we planned wasn’t suppose to be our life.”  – Gdonell

Mandy said in an interview, “I made the mistake of associating my entire identity with one single dream, and when that dream died, I very much felt like I died. I became a husk of a person for awhile.”

“Life doesn’t always go according to plan.  Sometimes heading in a new direction can be scary until you realize you’re headed toward a new and exciting destination.”  – Susan Cole

Then she got an electric tuner and spent 10 hours learning to sing each note perfectly.  “I couldn’t believe it”, she says, “My perfect pitch and muscle memory all came together.”  Mandy Harvey.

“If people are doubting how far you can go, go so far that you can’t hear them anymore.”  – Michele Ruiz

Then one day she decided to stop fighting against her dreams and start fighting for them.  She began writing her own songs and singing again.  She discovered that this real obstacle could be overcome.  She discovered that a big chunk of the real obstacle was in her own mind. Singing a song she composed she got sent straight through to the finals on America’s Got Talent.  She finished fourth.

“You don’t always need a plan.  Sometimes you just need to breathe, trust, and let go and see what happens.”  – Mandy Hale

If you take a good honest look at your life so far, you will see times where what you had planned fell apart – and that it was a good thing.  You underestimated what you were are capable of. You made plans that were far too limiting in regards to your potential.  When you let go of the expectation of the plan, and how it should go – and instead learned to feel your way with intuition, amazing things happened.

“We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us.”  – Joseph Campbell

You discover hidden talents.  You uncover better ways to expand your comfort zones.  So when the path you are walking on changes direction, don’t be afraid to keep going.  When the sign says “dead end” don’t be afraid to go off the path and create your own.  When the wind blows you backwards, grab a tree and hold on.  When life challenges you to sit it out, get up and fight to keep moving forward.

“If we can just let go and trust that things will work out the way they’re supposed to, without trying to control the outcomes, then we can begin to enjoy the moment more fully.  The joy of the freedom it brings becomes more pleasurable than the experience itself.”  – Goldie Hawn

LemonadeMakers is hosting a monthly free class on goals, resolutions, plans – whatever you want to call your means of change and transformation in your life.  We discuss on a live Zoom call what is happening that is working and not working.  Ideas to try to get us motivated to change and transform our lives.  Where we might re-evaluate our plans.  How to adjust our sails.

We invite you to join with us the first Saturday of every month.  The next class registration is opening today.  Come join us!  Click on the box to register now.

Breathe In The Love

Updated 2/01/2020

2020, in the month April it was the 10-year anniversary of my nephew murder.  He would have been 29 years old last month.  It’s hard to process everything that has happened as a consequence of that happening in our family.  My sister has more good days than bad, but she is still and will probably always be stuck in her loss.  My life has shifted so much I don’t think I am even in the time zone.  The ripples of his death will keep moving as long as someone reads this blog about our loss.

“No one is actually dead until the ripples they cause in the world die away…, ” – Terry Pratchett

Out of every great tragedy there comes the hidden blessings.  One of the blessings I received after my nephew’s murder was someone who was able to take the grief and loss that I felt and turn it into something beautiful and full of hope.  I wrote a poem purging myself of the intense waves of grief.  Writing is how I make sense of the senseless, it is how I can remain sane, when the crazy is calling my name.  So when my nephew was murdered, I wrote a poem about what I was going through.

“Writing is like breathing, it’s possible to learn to do it well, but the point is to do it no matter what” – Julia Cameron

I encourage anyone going through difficult times to write it out.  I think that it releases the poison, that would corrupt our souls.  In pain, we hold our breath.  Writing helps us to start breathing again.  To realize that we can still have a chance for a better and happier life.

“When we focus our energy towards constructing a passionate meaningful life, we are tossing a pebble into the world, creating a beautiful ripple effect of inspiration.  When one person follows a dream, tries something new or takes a daring leap, everyone nearby feels that energy and before too long they are making their own daring leaps and inspiring yet another circle” – Christine Mason Miller

I will print my poem at the end of this.  While I was able to process my way through the grief, it still felt a little dark.  The gift that this stranger was able to give me, was taking this poem and my story, and creating this beautiful song from it.  It took away the darkness in my poem and transmuted it into light.

I reached for this poem when someone else I love is having their own dark night of the soul.  We all need to remember that even though there are dark nights, they can be transmuted into something beautiful.

“Only in the darkness, can you see the stars” – Martin Luther King Jr.

I think that we all have those days, when the sky turns black, with no sunlight or starlight to shine upon us.  We think that God has turned his back on us.  We feel the intense emotions that threaten to drown us.  As I say in my poem, sometimes the sorrow burns us alive.

“Some days our grief appears as small manageable ripples.  Other days it completely crashes over us without any warning.  These are the days you need to be able to sit, reflect and remember; and not feel guilty in doing so” – Just Over the Rainbow Bridge

Sometimes it’s okay if the only thing that we can accomplish in a day, is to simply breathe.  Breathing in the love, turns the storm into a calmer sea.  The sun rises again.  As the poem ends, we can breathe again.  We can breathe in the love, grace, forgiveness, joy and hope and manifest it back into the world.

I hope you enjoy the song.  We had it created especially for LemonadeMakers.

“We all die.  The goal isn’t to live forever, the goal is to create something that will” – Chuck Palahniuk

Carl’s Poem

Yesterday you were so alive riding the oceans waves, yes, life was so simple and innocent

But now your soul has left behind your flesh, and your bones lie there just an empty cage

Help me, I can’t breathe as this news fractures my life, I am so unsafe, I just can’t balance

And grief engulfs me, and anger rages, and I just can’t breathe.

 

I can’t breathe from hearing the news on T.V or reading the printed pages of your murder

I feel the thunderous storm of emotions pass through me as lightning strikes my heart

The senselessness of your passing, the gunshots of a stranger who tore our lives asunder

And so, I grieve, and the sorrow burns as it drowns me, and I can’t breathe.

 

The hours pass into days as I stumble down this long road breathing with heavy sighs

The days spent in crying, and the primal screams of the dark nights merge into numbing weeks

Yet storm clouds break up as I begin to see the healing of the rainbow’s blessings

And so, I grieve, and I begin to breathe, I breathe love.

 

Life carries on with unending support of love that is surrounding me and protecting me

Forgiveness is the answer, so I move past the limitations of grief, rage, and sorrow

To live in limitless love, light and joy, and my heart-lines align to the universal love

And so, I breathe love, and I add grace, I breathe, I breathe grace.

 

Love from Carl’s heart washes through me, cleansing and healing every part of my body

A warm wave it ignites an inner fire of transformation that love is the ultimate expression of grace

It illuminates the greater vision for my life to emerge from within me, a graceful unfolding,

And so, I breathe love and grace, and I add forgiveness, I breathe, I breathe forgiveness.

 

I release the need to blame you Carl, myself, or anyone else for your ending,

I release fears grip on my soul, and I choose to walk this path with love

I have experienced a grace inspired event that challenged me, and I have awakened

And so, I breathe love, grace, forgiveness, and I add joy, I breathe, I breathe joy.

 

Grace has opened a door whose light illuminates my next step as I step out of the darkness

I share this, your gift to the world, that love is the ultimate expression of grace

As I practice this belief, practice will yield to insight, which yields to embodiment, which yields to manifestation.

And so, I breathe love, grace, forgiveness, joy, and I add hope, I breathe, I breathe hope.

 

As I breathe love, grace, forgiveness, joy and hope, life becomes a celebration again

And as I let my light shine, I unconsciously give others the permission to do the same

I will live like there is not tomorrow, I will live like there was no yesterday

I will breathe, I will breathe love, grace, forgiveness, joy and hope and manifest it out into the world.

Do What Makes Your Soul Shine

 

“Have goals, Chase dreams, but do not let your Happiness depend on their achievement”  – Manoj Arora

There is a promise today that we can achieve happiness from living a better life.  It might be taking certain herbs, oils or medications.  The promise of living a vegan, vegetarian, paleo lifestyle, that somehow having a special diet will make us feel happier.  Detoxing from all electronics.  Living a simple lifestyle, purging our homes of all the material things others think make them happier.  They all promise to somehow give us more energy and therefore more happiness.

You might still buy into that vision of being super woman – the woman that can balance raising children, maintain a pristine “Better Homes & Garden” home, successfully climb the corporate ladder, and still wear the sexy lingerie every night.  Who can be the soccer mom, volunteer at school. and bake homemade cookies for the classroom.  That mom who schedules and drives to every doctor appointment, after school activity, and social event.

“Sweetheart, marry your goals.  Remain committed to success and be loyal to your dreams.  It’s okay to choose yourself”  – r.h. Sin

Focus on what matters

You are so busy chasing perfection, that happiness when it briefly touches you, it is lost as a momentary endorphin high. With each hit, we immediately start seeking the next one.

“Don’t chase your dreams . . , Instead . . , Hunt your goals” – Preeya

Pause

Instead of moving immediately to the next thing on your list, sit on the feelings of happiness. Notice those moments of being grateful, relaxed, and appreciated that come from being happy. Feel it completely. Focus on the joy.

Like taking that first bite of your favorite food, savor the feeling from the top of your body down to your toes. Taking the time to fully experience happiness converts it from a temporary endorphin high to making it a lasting change in your mind and mood.

“She loves – the smell of coffee; blooming roses; and new beginnings” – Unknown

There is this balance of being happy from when you get a raise, and the happiness of completing a complex long term goal. The first one lifts your mood (an endorphin high) – like a favorite song that makes you want to sing and dance. The second one is deeply fulfilling because it was difficult to achieve.  The amount of happiness in your life is dependent on the quality of your thoughts.

Get granular

The question to ask yourself is “what is your definition” of a life well lived?  All you will get from chasing perfection is exhaustion.  Get curious about what makes you happy?  Your current circumstances have nothing to do with your current state of happiness or lack thereof.  Ask yourself where your passion comes from?  What gives you joy?

“Do not chase another human being.  Instead, chase your curiosity.  Chase your development and your goals.  Chase your passion.  Strive to work for something bigger than yourself, and instead of trying to convince someone that you fit within their world – build your own”  – Bianca Sparacino

It’s the little things that create a lasting happiness.

• The playlist that elevates your mood – Pharrel Williams “Happy” (did your mind just start singing this song?)
• Celebrating every step you make in achieving your goals – completing 7 days of 15 minute workouts
• Friend networks that keep us committed and accountable – text reminders, phone calls, meetups
• Find the things that spark your joy and include them in your daily schedule – take time to smell the roses
• Gratitude – make a daily list of three things you are grateful for each day

“In the midst of movement and chaos, keep stillness inside of you”  – Deepak Chopra

Make your own list of little things that make you happy and include those things with every goal you create.  You will find it easier to start each new goal and to build and keep momentum in accomplishing each goal. It’s vitally important to remember that the goals you set are not a final destination.

“There is no substitute for the creative inspiration, knowledge, and stability that comes from knowing how to contact your core of inner silence”  – Deepak Chopra

Goals, dreams and visions are a part of the journey, not your final destination.  The combination of the quality of goals you set for yourself and how they expand your comfort zone creates who you are becoming.  It is the self knowledge that each experience reveals to you that tells you where you are on your journey of self knowledge.  It is walking in the direction of your life’s purpose that brings in lasting happiness.

I invite you to join us on February 1st for a live workshop on how to make 2020 the year of achievement.

Get clear on what you want and how to obtain it. If your 2020 goals are already stalling, get recharged and refocused. Learn how to pivot to success.

Just click below to get started.

Instead of just thinking “I could do this” come and find out just how much you can do, confront your deepest fears. Stop playing small. Shine out in all of your brilliance. Give yourself permission to be all that you can be in 2020.

Get Clarity By Magnifying Your Life Purpose

“If you can tune into your purpose and really align with it, setting goals so that your vision is an expression of that purpose, then life flows much more easily.”  – Jack Canfield

There is a dream that you had as a child.  It was a persistent dream.  It was a longing that would not be denied.  Maybe you went for it and failed.  Or maybe you were too scared to even try.  Or maybe you had the “one hit wonder” and then faded away, too afraid that you could never repeat or even surmount the dream.  That dream contained your purpose.  How it was fulfilled was your vision of what it could be.

“Focus on your own happiness, focus on your own life, focus on your own vision.”– GreatestQuotes.net

My dream was to write. 

I did well in school.  I loved learning.  I would read 6-7 books a week.  I would check out the maximum number of books every week and read them all.  My family was always moving somewhere new.  Until my Freshman year in high school I didn’t attend any complete grade in one school.  So books were my best friends and my escape.  And every single book I read, I would say to myself, “I could write this book.  Maybe even write it better than the author did.”

“Life will only change when you become more committed to your dreams than you are to your comfort zone.”  – Peerhustle.com

The problem was while I told myself that, the doing of the actual writing was outside of my comfort zone and I was terrified that I wasn’t as smart as I thought I was.  The fact that I got straight A’s and was in honors didn’t overcome the fears.  In fact it magnified them.  In my mind I was sitting on the pedestal and if I actually tried to write a book, I would topple off the pedestal and be subject to ridicule.

“Don’t try to overhaul your life overnight.  Instead, focus on making one small change at a time.  Over time, those small changes will add up to big transformation.  Don’t give up!” – emilysquotes.com

So I dreamed of writing year after year and fed my purpose a starvation diet of book after book that someone else who was smarter and braver wrote while I just dreamed about it.  I believe that God plants your purpose inside of you.  It never goes away.  I believe that door after door of opportunity comes you way to express it to its full potential.  I believe that the ups and downs of life itself are generated in such a way to try to coax you or force you to take up your dream and live it.

“A vision of a desired future allows you to engage and identify immediately in your focus with an improved condition.  It changes what you perceive and how you perform – NOW.  It’s not about achieving something in time.  It’s rather about the quality of choices you are making in this moment – what you choose to perceive, feel, and do.  It’s about getting the most out of your experience.”– David Allen

I believe that at least one of the New Year’s Resolutions or goals that you set – are a part of your life purpose. 

When my nephew was murdered I was forced through the door of writing.  I didn’t really understand what was happening at first.  By the time I realized that I had committed myself to writing LemonadeMakers I had literally changed my world.  All my goals before that were about changing myself to make other people happy.  Lose weight and be healthy for my family.  Climb the corporate ladder so that my family would be secure financially, and so on.

“Focus on where you want to go instead of the obstacles in your path.  Drive and persistence will take you to your desired destination.”– slideshare.net

Now all of a sudden, the question that I was asking was,

“Who do I need to be to make LemonadeMakers be what it is supposed to be? What do I need to learn? What habits do I need to bring into my life? Who can help me?”

It is such a unique space of focus away from fear of not being loved if I wasn’t giving all of me to my family or job – to the space of how can I help others find this place seeing “what else is possible”? It is kind of funny when I finally understood that giving all of me to my family or job was from fear and not love. And now I am finally living most of my time from love and not fear. Fear still shows up, disguised as self sabotage. Then fear is shown to the door, when once again I recognize it for what it is.

Somewhere in your goals that you are setting for 2020 is a part of your life purpose. 

It is the thing that you dream about when your mind wanders.  What is it that you do, that is similar to my inside my head comment when I was reading a good book.  What is your version of a “I could do this”?  Think about the thing that pops into your head, that is immediately discounted by your negative self talk.  There is something there to explore and understand more fully.

That “thing” will keep showing up month after month, year after year, decade after decade.  That idea or concept will not leave you – it can’t. It will keep haunting you, until you are expressing it to its fullest potential or you have died with the dream still unfulfilled within you.  So take a leap of faith.  Be brave.

Come join us on February 1st for our “Living the Dream” free workshop and take the first step in putting your dream into reality.

We are going to explore some ideas outside of the box on how to start living our dreams.  We are going to dig into our goals and expose the root systems to see how they connect to our life purpose.  It is more than a dream board.  It is more than writing the dream out on paper.  It is more than a calendar full of appointments and meetings and blocking out time to implement what needs to be done and when you will do it.  It is  more than a single leap of faith or five baby sets of doing something.

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light. . , that most frightens us. . , ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?’ . . , who are you not to be?. . , Your playing small does not serve the world . . , We are all meant to shine. . ,  as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” ― Marianne Williamson

I invite you to join us on February 1st for a live workshop on how to make 2020 the year of achievement. Get clear on what you want and how to obtain it. If your 2020 goals are already stalling, get recharged and refocused. Learn how to pivot to success.

Just click below to get started.

During the call you will have the opportunity to create, find a pivot or two, reimagine and refuel your life dreams.

I know that if someone gives me something I may or may not make the time to actually do the work. But if someone takes the time to work with me through the material I get some action and forward momentum started. So take this small first step for 2020 and lets create something personally designed just for you!

Instead of just thinking “I could do this” come and find out just how much you can do, confront your deepest fears. Stop playing small. Shine out in all of your brilliance. Give yourself permission to be all that you can be in 2020.

 

What Story Will This Year Add to Your Life?

 

They say that we all have at least one book inside of us.  It could be a biography; a cookbook; gardening; crafts; fiction or nonfiction.  You could write science fiction, mystery, comedy, drama and so on.  You might have overcome tragedy and write about how you did it.  All kinds of ideas can come creeping inside of your head on what you would want to pass on to the next generation.  Lessons learns that can help others live a happier more fulfilled life.

Your entire life journey ultimately consists of the steps you are taking at this very moment – S. Williams

You might look at the goal of writing a book and shrink back.  It’s going to take a lot of time and sacrifice to write.  It might not be, no – it definitely won’t be any good.  The publishers will reject it and then I will have wasted all of that time and effort.  You might come up with a million reasons and excuses on why not – but what if you did it for the one right reason?  What reason?

You have a story to tell

What if this year is different and you choose to tell it?  How could you make it happen?  How do you make any kind of big hairy audacious goal happen?  The same way the joke says that you eat an elephant – one bite at a time.

A pivot to me is an about movement.  A turning point.  A radical way of viewing something that expands your universe as well as your personal space.  It is the realization that we are all the same, yet at the same time you have the ability to be your own unique person.  It is the understanding that one size does not fit all, and you have the gift of being able to alter any situation into one that does fit the one of a kind “YOU”.

Your vision helps you focus on your dreams – Chris D Costello

So, what is your big dream?

• Writing a book?
• Making a change in your career?
• Going back to school?
• Moving someplace far away?
• Traveling to see the world?
• What is on your bucket list?

What’s holding you back?

The typical answers are time and money.  You might have one but not the other.  But that isn’t really what is holding you back.  Fear is what does it.

Chase one rabbit at a time

There is a proverb that says that if you chase two rabbits, you won’t catch either one.  Maybe one of the issues with New Year’s Resolutions is that we are all chasing more than one rabbit?

That’s what I love about the idea of changing the time frame from a yearly resolution to a smaller time frame.  You can chase one rabbit at a time.

So, this year try something new.  Take your goal, your big hairy audacious goal, and put it into bite size chunks.

It could be one week at a time, four weeks at a time; twelve weeks at a time – you decide what works for you.  Say for example you want to write a book.  Start with a story line – Who is your hero?  Your protagonist?  What are their stories?  Their dreams of life and their failures.  Sketch them out – families, school, work, friends.

Focus means:  F-ollow;  O-ne;  C-ourse;  U-ntil;  S-uccess – Unknown

Start with a three-hour block of time per week.  You can have one three-hour block of time, or three one-hour blocks.  Do what you know you can commit to.

Keep a notebook with you to write down thoughts and ideas as they occur to you.  Write down your dreams the minute you wake up, because your subconscious is going to start working in your favor.  It’s going to give you whole scenes to write down.

Your story is based on who you become in your lifetime.  It is based on small decisions and large ones.  It is based on what life throws your way and what you throw back.  It is based on what you create out of what you have been given.

When I was first married my husband went to an auction with one of his friends.  He came home with a box.  It was a random box of stuff that they auctioned unopened.  Inside was stuff you probably would have thrown away and not even given to the goodwill.

What can I make out of this?

I was mad at first that he wasted his money.  Then I became determined to do something positive and useful with this box of stuff.  I took apart all of the material from the clothes inside the box and created a baby quilt out of it for our first child.  I still think of that today whenever life has given me a box of stuff, I think I can’t use.  I take it apart and say, now what can I make out of this?

When I dare to be powerful – to use my strength in the service of my vision, then it becomes less and less important whether I am afraid – Audre Lorde

• What is your vision?
• What is your three most critical things to do with your life this year?
• What is your plan to get it done?
• As time passes, how is your focus on getting it done?

What distractions and obstacles are showing up in your life at this moment?

From a solution perspective, how do you live your life on purpose?  A key ingredient is knowing when to pivot, to rethink your plan, while still accomplishing your goals.  It’s a new year – you have made some plans, goals, or resolutions for this year, is it time to pivot? To rethink your plan?

Don’t waste any more time

Don’t waste any more time avoiding your dreams or thinking that they are impossible. Pick them up and make them a priority.

Need some ideas to unlock your potential?  Contact us.

Launch Yourself on Every Wave

 

Life, like surfing, is all about wave selection and balance. Never let the best waves in life pass you by. Ride it now before it’s too late – Kiteboardstuff.com

I believe that your dreams, your true dreams, are given to you at birth.  That you are designed to grow and stretch beyond what you think you are capable of.

That you were given heroes journeys to push you to accomplish the dreams.  That those dreams are what make you passionate and give you a life of purpose.

I think of people who are adventurers and broke open new journeys you didn’t even know you could go on.  People like the Wright Brothers, who pioneered the ability to fly.  Pilots like Charles Lindbergh and Amelia Earhart who created and broke records in pioneering flight.  Amelia Earhart said, “What do dreams know of boundaries?”

She had true unfaltering determination and pushed her limits.  She said, “when you fail, your failure must be but a challenge to others”.  I love the concept of my failures actually serving as something positive – to challenge others to succeed in their own dreams.

You don’t get into something to test the waters.  You get into things to make waves – Rituals

Every year there are new tech companies that are creating a new cutting-edge business or disrupting an industry.  Right now, someone is launching themselves in trying to fulfill a dream they never thought they could accomplish.  The really critical thing is to not give up on your dream as being too far beyond your capability to accomplish.

When someone decided one day that they wanted to be a mountain climber, they didn’t just walk out the door and climb a mountain.

• They got training in how to use the equipment
• They got training both in the body and the mind, to equip them for the journey.
• They started with small mountains and worked their way up to the bigger ones.
• They joined a club with others who like that sport, becoming a member of a team.
• They fell down, got back up and fell down again and again, until they started reaching mastery.

It is done step by step, day by day, year by year.

The only way to make sense out of change is to plunge into it, move with it, and join the dance – Alan Watts

You have to grow and expand your comfort zone again and again.  You have to have the trust that you deserve to fulfill the dream.  You work hard to get the skills that are necessary to make it happen.  You learn to trust yourself and your team.

Change is part of the dance of your life.  You learn to trust the dream as it shifts, changes and transforms too.

Sometimes as you are moving towards the dream, it is like driving through fog.  All you can see is the next 10 feet in front of you.  You travel towards what you see and as you travel, you see farther and farther.  You might see what you thought was a mailbox on the side of road shift into something else as you get clearer eyesight.

This is because your brains will take what little you can see or decipher, and basically guess at what you are seeing based on past knowledge. But as you get more clarity by pursuing the dream it seems to shift its shape into something totally different.

It’s not so much that the dream is changing as it is that you are getting a better understanding about what the dream really is.  Each problem that you encounter and solve changes you.  Each change brings the dream into more clarity.

You begin to realize that there are 50 different ways you can achieve your dream.  That your expectations around the dream are what is really changing, not the dream itself.  You begin to truly imagine the possibilities of the dream.

The big waves in life might come from outside of you, but the ability to ride them comes from inside of you – from your character strengths – Fatima Doman

Over and over again you can see the concept of “as above, so below”.

The teaching of the tree of your life reaching high into the heavens and deep below the surface with the roots.  Life is not lived in one direction only.  If you are reaching only for the sky and neglect your roots, the imbalance in your life may create temporary success, but will inevitably fall over.  And if you only feed the roots and neglect reaching for the heavens, then you won’t produce anything positive in your life.

It is the combination of inner and outer growth that leads to true lasting success.

I love the concept of “together we are an ocean”.  If you are interested, I can help you learn how to create your own personalized dream map, claim your own unique goals of change and transformation; refine them into goal crushing gremlins; and finally, to truly understand what your motivation around those goals is all about.

It’s not just about writing some words on a piece of paper that says in 30 days I will . . . ,   It’s not just about creating a vision board with pretty pictures of our dream house, vacations, our dream body or $1M in our bank account, and then waiting for the “magic” to draw in what we want in our lives.

You need to brainstorm your way to make your dreams a reality.  To map out your detours around your own unique self-sabotaging obstacles, and finally be able to fully implement your plan.

What I know for sure is that you will hit walls of failure, fatigue.  At some point you will get that feeling that “Life happens to you”, when it really is happening for you.  It will feel like when you are getting hit with a sledgehammer.  It helps to have a few tricks up your sleeves to handle those times, so that they just create slowdowns.  Just don’t give up and stop completely.

As a kid did you ever play the game Red Light/Green Light?  You had someone who called out Red Light for Stop and Green Light for Go.  The goal was to reach the finish line first.  Let’s change that game just a little. 

It’s Not Just About Chasing A Dream, It’s About Catching It Too

 

Never give up on a dream just because of the time it will take to accomplish it.  The time will pass anyway – Earl Nightingale

On your birthday and at the beginning of each new year you take a look at both the time that has passed, and what time might yet be available to you.

• You think of the dreams you have that haven’t come true yet.
• You wonder if you have what it takes to get them done.
• You might even judge yourself of not being worthy of them coming true.

I firmly believe that if God has planted something in your heart to do, then you must have the ability to do it.  At the same time, you might wonder if he’s really, really sure you can do it, because it feels like it is just out of reach.  You might wonder “who am I” to go after something that big.  Fears creep in all sorts of shapes and sizes to prevent the dreams from being fulfilled.

My son was visiting with his wife and a little dog.  They took in a rescue dog.  He’s named after the pirate in the movie The Goonies – “One-Eyed Willie” because before they got him, he had lost an eye.

Willie loves cheese.  My son will hold up a piece of cheese and Willie will jump up to get it.  He will hold it up just out of Willie’s “normal” jumping ability and it is amazing how high that little dog will jump for his cheese.  At first you think he can’t do it, but he is determined and somehow, he gets just a little bit higher and grabs his cheese.  We all cheer for him.

When you are pursuing a dream, it has to be something just out of reach.  Otherwise, it isn’t something that stretches you.  It must be something that you aren’t sure how to do or what to do to make it happen.  Like Willie, if you want it bad enough, you will find that little bit of extra strength and leap up just high enough to grab “your cheese” (dream) and pull it down into reality.

Take a moment and write this out for yourself (taken from the program DO IT SCARED with my own additions) fill in the blanks at the end of each sentence.

Every year millions of people make New Year’s Resolutions or Goals.  If you have ever joined a gym, you see it happen year after year.  The goal of weight loss or physical fitness of some sort is made, and the gyms are all packed in January.  In February they begin losing a few people.  In March a few more and by April the gym is back to what is normal attendance.

Why do we make goals each year that after a few months fall by the wayside?  And what can you do to make this year different?

So many of our dreams at first seem impossible, then they seem improbable, and then when we summon the will, they soon become inevitable – Christopher Reeves

I don’t think it is just a matter of being or having something you truly desire.  And it isn’t just a matter of will power.  Or attitude.  Or a million other words that mean essentially the same thing as motivation.  It is more complicated than that.

• Some of it is planning.
• Some of it is accountability.
• Some of it is getting past the feeling of overwhelm.  You have so much on your list of what needs to be done, or what you may not even know how to do.
• Some of it is getting past feeling frustrated when you seem to be stuck in the mud and can’t make any progress.

So many other little negative reasons, stop signs, or caution lights that add up to another year, in which you didn’t make any or very little progress towards your dreams.

Create a vision that is crisp and clear.  A perfect clarity for both the near distance and far into the future.  To build on your foundation of living a better life, whatever that means to you personally.  A year where you can make progress each month and celebrate what you are accomplishing.

A dream written down with a date becomes a goal.  A goal broken down into steps becomes a plan.  A plan backed by action makes your dreams come true – unexpectedlydomestic.com

In pursuit of that, take the paragraph that you wrote out above and chose three words that will create three big hairy audacious goals for this year.

Rather than just talking about how to fill in a bunch of answers and creating a goal plan with steps, I would love to invite you to contact me via messenger.

• Learn how to claim your goals.
• Learn how to refine them.
• Learn how to understand what your motivation around those goals is about.

It’s not just about you writing some words on a piece of paper.  It’s also about brainstorming your way, mapping out the detours around the obstacles to fully implement your plan.

What I know for sure is that we all hit walls of failure, fatigue, and flat tires.  It helps us to have a few tricks up our sleeves to handle them so that they just create slowdowns and maybe a few detours, but not letting anything stop you completely.

Pursuing Life’s Dreams, Second Star to the Right and Straight On With No Distractions

And every day, the world will drag you by the hand, yelling, “This is important! And this is important! And this is important! You need to worry about this! And this! And this! And each day, it’s up to you to yank your hand back, put it on your heart and say, “No. This is what’s important.”

– Ian Thomas

What we all need to realize, is that the lights of the passing ships are mere distractions preventing you from living your life to the fullest.  They are the battles that you fight each day, but which do not lead us anywhere.  When we honestly realize how asleep we are in our lives, those are the moments when you can begin to challenge the ongoing distractions and bring focus back to the stars – the lights of our true destination.

In a world deluged by irrelevant information, clarity is power.

  – Yuval Noah Harari

It’s like someone has set up a circus tent in front of us.  You hear the chaos of the music and the shouting barkers telling you about what’s happening in their tents.  You hear the shouts and screams of people as they spin and circle and go up and down on the rides.  You smell the funnel cakes and cotton candy and popcorn.  Bright lights spin on the games as they encourage you to step up and try your luck.  So many distractions that you can’t hear yourself think.  All of the bright shiny objects promising you the moon, if you just come nearer and pay attention to them.  It is a constant battle for your attention.  Who wins?  The one you pay attention to.

It is those who concentrate on but one thing at a time who advance in this world.

– Og Mandino

I love to ride the roller coaster.  To watch the performers with the animals.  To see the daring artist high up on the trapeze dancing across the wire.  There are lots of fun and exciting things that we can do in our life.  What we have to decide is are they part of our goals and dreams, or are they just fun distractions that keep us occupied, distracted.  Are they keeping us occupied so that we are not making the changes and transformations that we need to make in order to achieve the life of our dreams?  Are they fun things that we should be saying “no” to?

The successful warrior is the average man, with laser-like focus.

– Bruce Lee

Are we living our life with laser-like focus?  I always think of Bruce Lee when he is in his stance about to engage with someone in battle.  He doesn’t hear the sounds around him.  He doesn’t see the bright shiny objects trying to distract him.  He see’s only one thing – the man in front of him that he’s about to engage in battle with.

The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes.

– Marcel Proust

Remember the movie City Slickers?  Remember Curly, Jack Palance’s character?  I love his famous line –

“Curly : Do you know what the secret of life is?
[holds up one finger]
Curly : This.
Mitch : Your finger?
Curly : One thing. Just one thing. You stick to that and the rest don’t mean shit.
Mitch : But, what is the “one thing?”
Curly : [smiles] That’s what *you* have to find out.”

When you are pursuit of the “that one thing”, then the rest of the world fades away.  We don’t see the lights of the passing ships – we are laser focused on that star – that bright shining light in the night sky.  We no longer wander through the circus seeking distractions.  Now we are traveling for fulfillment.  We are seeing the world with new eyes.  New eyes that are open for the first time to the many doors of potential and opportunity that we missed when we were being distracted by the circus.

But I’ll tell you what hermits realize.  If you go off into a far, far forest and get very quiet, you’ll come to understand that you’re connected with everything 

  – Alan Watts

That is kind of what the movie City Slickers was about – those men had gone asleep to what was important in their lives.  They were living by distraction, not laser-like focus.  The meaning of life can be found in many things if we are awake and looking for it.  It tends to show up when we are out of our normal element.  Going off on a day trip to the mountains, the beach, the desert.  Away from the day to day of our life.  Away from the distractions that follow us around.

Be addicted to your passions, not your distractions.  

  – Unknown

It is when we can get quiet that a connection is possible.  We finally see the truths we have been avoiding with the distractions.  We discover that the thread of destiny in our life, is where the laser-like focus really begins to take shape.  That “thing” that we not so much latch on to, as it latches on to us.  We are pushed, pulled, and prodded until finally we realize that we have no choice – we have to live the life that brings our destiny into fulfillment.

Tomorrow becomes never.  No matter how small the task, take the first step now!

  – Tim Ferriss

If like the character in City Slickers you don’t know what that “one thing” is, go find it.  Go somewhere quiet without any of the normal distractions in your life.  Sit and think about your life.  Dig up all of your old dreams that you abandoned as not being possible when you failed the first time.  Reconnect with your passion, the thing that liberates your energy and your spirit.  The thing that inspires hope in you again.  When you find it, do everything in your power to stay connected.

In life, people tend to wait for the good things to come to them.  And by waiting, they miss out.

  – Neil Strauss

Let the circus roll on by.  Don’t stop for the Carmel Corn or the Hot Dog.  Don’t go on the rides, or play the games, or watch the circus clowns climb in and out of the clown car.  Keep your eyes on the stars, and not the passing ships lights.  Clarity, focus, making things happen.  That’s how you keep your  eyes on your stars.  Ignore the circus as it shouts to you about what it thinks is so important.  Once you understand your own destiny, your secret of life, don’t let that connection go.  Remember that the best view comes after the hardest climb.

Resistance – Here There Be Dragons

 

As fellow travelers on the road of transformation, we here at LemonadeMakers have been checking our course against our mission, vision and purpose.  As part of that “checking in” you take compass headings, check your map and determine the next part of your course.  What you realize as you take your course headings, is that you have gone off course.  You have sunk into the comfort zone.

In order to create the kind of life you want to live; you have to focus on what’s important to you. To maintain harmony in your life and stay on course, means that you need to examine where you are in your own personal hero’s journey.

Self-transformation is a lifetime journey.  It’s the never-ending story of who you are, and more importantly, who you are becoming.

As you travel down this road you will reach what I call “way points”. These way points are the places where you check in and get supplies for the next leg of your journey. Where you pull out your map to see that course corrections need to be instituted.

Unless you have not moved at all, you will need to make some adjustments to get back on course.  That’s because the “dragons of resistance” are always at work.  Fears, distractions, addictions, just the contrary winds of life in general – it is all designed to take you off course.

Part of checking your course is to see where your own map is ending – the edges of your own comfort zones.  While you may have expanded this zone in the past, you are now needing to expand it again. It is time to reengage the battle, to face off with your dragons of resistance.

You have an intuitive knowing that deep inside of you is a second self.  An unlived you.  Your authentic self.

The dragon of resistance doesn’t want that authentic self-released.  LemonadeMakers writes these blogs to help you learn to recognize your own personal dragons of resistance.  LemonadeMakers is offering you the opportunity to wake up and assist you in finding that authentic self.

Do you want to navigate your life with love, inspiration, and peace? In order to help with your staying on course, we try to provide these daily reminders to become more self-aware of what is going on in your life.  To become more self-aware of the doors of opportunity that show up in your life.

If you looked at the ancient mariner maps, you would see at the corners of the map, a warning. “Here there be dragons”. As the hero of your own journey, you are going to face those dragons.

Did your dragon of resistance just raise his head and roar at you?

On the field of transforming yourself, stands a hero and a dragon. You are the hero and resistance is the dragon. The dragon confronts you every single time you want to start on a new journey of self-transformation.  Every time you expand your comfort zone.  Every time you make a new goal, a new dream.  Resistance will make itself known.

You will hear many roars from your dragon – fears labeled no time, no money, too risky.  It feels safe when you are invisible, average, because then your dragons fire can’t burn you.  Every fear that your dragon bellows at you has some part of reality in it.  Some vestiges of truth that have been stretched into a terrifying illusion by the dragon of resistance.

You can use these dragons of resistance as the needle of a compass to what your God-given destiny is pulling you towards.  You know that this God-given destiny is not average. You deserve better than average.

You can use the dragon of resistance to guide you to that calling or purpose.  A good rule of thumb is that the more important the call is to your soul’s evolution, the more the dragon of resistance is going to show up.

The dragon is out to destroy the reason you are being called: the living out loud of your divine destiny, your personal genius, the soul’s gift you have that no one else on this earth has but you.

You will know if you are on course, by the level of resistance you are currently feeling to discovering more about your authentic self.

You are on a lifetime journey of discovery.  There is always something new to learn, discover, uncover and reveal about who you are and why you are here now.

Your work is to learn more about your personal vision, your dreams of who you want to be. To ask what’s missing?

Ready to widen your comfort zone?  Ready to confront and tame or destroy a few dragons?

Create a Ripple of Inspiration and Meaning In Your Life

“No matter how happy someone may seem, they have moments when they question if they can go on.  No matter how confident someone may look, there are times when they feel insecure and unsure.  And no matter how strong someone may appear, they have days when they feel like they’re falling apart.  Never think for a moment you’re alone with your struggles.  You’re not a mess.  You’re human.”  – Lori Deschene

Most of my friends and relatives consider me a very positive person.  Someone who can handle whatever life throws my way.  A person who will look and look until she finds the silver in the silver lining of the cloud.  But there are days when I think that I am not capable of helping myself, let alone others.  There are days when I feel like I am not having a positive impact on anyone.  There are days when I look at everything I am trying to accomplish with my life and wonder why I am bothering – when it feels like I am working so hard and getting nowhere fast.

“To attract loving and connected relationships, we must first embody the love and connection we seek” – Dr. Debra Reble

Those days will happen to you, no matter how strong you think or others think you are.  When they do happen, I have a story that I pull out to remind myself that I am creating ripples, even when I don’t know who those ripples are helping.

A couple of years after my mother had passed away, a friend that used to babysit my kids when they were little and she was a teenager, lost her daughter (a senior in high school) in a bus accident.  She was having a really hard time and we were talking about her loss.  I really don’t remember what I told her, but I know that it had to do with something I had brought out of the loss of my mom on how to deal with grief and heartbreak.

Years later she was at my mother in-laws funeral and she came up to me to thank me for those words.  She remembered them all.  They helped her through the dark tunnel of her grief.  I had no idea that anything I said could be that impactful.  I know that with her own experience, she also was able to give those words to others when they were dealing with overwhelming grief.  What I don’t know is how many ripples those words have made, and how many more they will impact.

To be truly happy, you must have connection in your life.  First the connection must be to you.  To your life purpose.  To personal growth.  To being the best possible you, that you can be.  Self love, self trust, being honest with yourself.  Then connection to friends, family, to a mission, vision or cause is vital to live a life that brings you satisfaction, fulfillment and happiness.

It’s also about the way you think about things that are happening – are they happening “to you” or “for you”?  Do you look for the silver lining?  Do you assign the best possible meanings to what you see and hear around you?  Or does that negative mind talk take over and make you feel unwanted?

• You are a mistake
• All you do is make mistakes
• You know that everyone is judging you

“Don’t focus on what’s wrong. Things may not be perfect but be grateful for the opportunity to experience each day. Live each day like it could be your last” – Joel Osteen

When your only seeing yourself through the lens of your past mistakes, your regrets and failures – you need to remind yourself that you are so much more.  There is a beautiful person hiding inside of you that is vulnerable and afraid.  Fears of not being worthy, not enough.  Fears of being hurt because someone hurt you in the past.  Whenever this beauty seeks to emerge you push it back because fear tells you it isn’t safe.

Think of the caterpillar all wrapped up in the chrysalis.  He has transformed into a beautiful butterfly.  It is time to break open the lining, to unfold the wings to dry, and take flight.  But in fear he keeps grabbing the sides of the lining to try and stay hidden.  It’s a scary world out there.

• What if he is the one butterfly that can’t fly?
• What if he falls out of the chrysalis and goes smashing down on the ground?
• What if a passing bird eats him?

All these fears overwhelm him and he tries to hide himself to keep him safe.  Yet the real danger is in staying hidden.

Just like this butterfly, you might think that you are providing safety, by hiding behind a mountain of buried pain.  It is time to tear down that mountain.  To remove every single brick of the walls that you have built up.  To put down the suitcase of your past failures and disappointments, and walk burden free into your future.  It is time to spread your wings.  It is time to fly into the future you are meant to have.  Yes there will be new failures as you learn to soar.  Remember that you have potential.  That you have gifts that enable you to live a life full of possibilities.  You can make your dreams a reality.  But nothing will happen, until you try.

“Resolutions for the Soul – No more what if’s…, no more wondering what if I tried that, started that, said that, told that person how I really feel, went on that adventure.  No more wondering what if.  Starting now, we do it, try it, step out, start, take the risk, make the leap.  We make a vow to stop living wondering, what if…,?”  – Rob Bell

Quit collecting every painful word that has even been spoken to you or about you.  Quit putting meaning to thoughtless words and actions of both yourself and others.   Since every experience is seen through your minds eye, change your mind and start collecting hope. Start putting the best meaning possible into what you hear. Start viewing your world through the lens of compassion, both for yourself and for others.

When you focus on leading a creative, positive, inspirational life fear is going to raise it’s head.  Fear is always triggered when you pursue change.  Change is growth and growth is something to be happy about.  Do you remember as a child standing against the wall and measuring how tall you were?  How you would measure yourself against your friends and family members who were taller than you to see if you had grown to the same height or gotten taller?  You couldn’t wait to grow.  Instill that same feeling into your own personal growth.  Fear hates it when it doesn’t know for absolutely positively how something is going to turn out.  Uncertainty is something that fear can’t stand.  But you can change your relationship with both fear and uncertainty.

“Because true belonging only happens when we present our authentic, imperfect selves to the world, our sense of belonging can never be greater than our level of self acceptance”  – Brene Brown,  PHD, LMSW

Never let fears stop you from pursuing your dreams. Don’t let your fears of what might happen, mean that you don’t make anything happen. Come join us for our next Zoom call. Bring all of those creative “hope” juices to the table and let’s see what we can make.

Believing in Your Imagination Makes Anything Possible

 

• How do you believe anything is possible?
• How do you see opportunity instead of risk?
• How do you take flying leaps into the unknown without having overwhelm knock you back down?

Reframing.  It is one of those things that is both simple and hard at the same time.  Every hero story needs a villain.  Something to overcome.

You think that you would love to have the easy answers to all of life’s problems.  Just program the computer to make all of the decisions for you.  A GPS system that told you where to go, and what to do when you got there.

If that was life’s reality, you would be bored.  You would feel like you were living in a cage.  Every child at some point in their life has said, “You’re not the boss of me!”  You would not be happy without the freedom to make your own decisions.

• You reframe the fear that is activating the belief that something is impossible
• You reframe the fear that tells you what you want is too hard to do
• You reframe the fear that what you are thinking of doing, is too risky
• You reframe the fear that you will be overwhelmed by what you are trying to do

“You know what the issue is with this world?  Everyone wants a magical solution to their problem, and everyone refuses to believe in magic” – Alice in Wonderland

Have you ever been going somewhere with the GPS system in your car telling you where to go?  If you are going on a long trip and you get off the freeway to eat, take a bio-break, or get fuel for your vehicle, the GPS system goes crazy trying to get you back on the scheduled directions.  Reframing is taking our GPS system which is telling us to go from point A to point B and reprogramming it for some additional stops.  Places on the map that are invisible but there just the same.

“Stop worrying how it’s going to happen and start believing that it will” – Unknown

“The strongest factor for success is self-esteem:  Believing you can do it, believing you deserve it and believing you’ll get it” – Unknown

Have you ever completed a big remodel project?  You start out with a plan and design of how everything will be done.  You start tearing down the bathroom walls and floor, and you discover that your $10K remodel just changed to a $20K remodel because all of the plumbing is cast iron.  The pipes have decayed, rusting away and it all has to be replaced.

“Just because the past didn’t turn out like you wanted it to, doesn’t mean your future can’t be better than you ever imagined” – Unknown

Your small change just became a major remodel.  You now have two choices.  You can let fears enter the picture telling you that:

• You’re in overwhelm at the additional cost and time for your remodel
• You’re letting fear of change control your decisions
• You’re feeling not good enough because you should have foreseen this, you knew it’s an old the house

OR you reframe it.

• The good news is that now you won’t have another plumbing bill for leaky pipes
• The good news is that this gives you the ability to reconstruct the configuration of the pipes, and now you can have the bathtub and shower where you always wanted them.
• The good news is you have this reframing process down, which signifies change and growth are finally happening
• The good news is that you’ve discovered your hidden potential for greatness is in an area that you never knew existed – you’re great at pivoting to a reframe

“It’s okay to be a glow stick.  Sometimes we have to break before we can shine” – Unknown

 

That’s what life changes are like.  You start out thinking that you want to make a small change in your life.  You get started taking down all of things that no longer benefit you in your life.  Then the unexpected happens.  You discover a pattern you didn’t know existed, (which has behind the scenes) is what has been keeping you from implementing those important life changes.

“Forget all the reasons why it won’t work and believe the one reason it will” – Unknown

What’s important during a period of reframing is to “see” or create a vision of what exactly you want your life to look like.  What sort of bathroom floor do you want?  What kind of tile for the shower floor? The walls of shower?  What kind of lights and fixtures?  What kind of vanity?  What does your ideal dream bathroom look like?  Don’t focus on the plumbing issues.  Don’t let the cost overruns overwhelm you.  Reset your focus to see the ideal outcome, the end of the project, the finished bathroom.

“A successful man is one who can lay a firm foundation with the bricks others have thrown at him” – David Brinkley

Reframing looks at what everyone else might see as a series of mistakes and failures and asks the question – what else is possible?  You see how to make lemonade from lemons.  It shows you a series of lessons, each one building on the other.  Taking each of those “bricks” being thrown at you, you can begin building a secure foundation to hold the structure, you are creating outside your comfort zone.

“The only limits you have are the limits you believe” – Wayne Dyer

As a professional procrastinator I will take something that might take anyone else a few hours to do and blow it up into a month-long project.  First by researching it to death, because you can never have too much knowledge.

Then by creating a perfect plan, that is revised a million times, because you can’t have too much attention to the smallest detail.  I build up the fear of failure until it creates a bridge to the moon.  Then because I can’t hold back time any longer, I am pushed to finally do something.

• What if you reframe the possible mistake or failure?
• What if you reframe everything that has gone wrong already and that will go wrong in the future?
• What if, instead of letting doubt control your life, you look at everything as just an experiment?
• What if, instead of being afraid, you are curious?
• What if every project is like taking a cup of water and adding a drop of this chemical or that one – to see what happens and writing down the results in a notebook?
• What if this is just a series of lessons rather than errors?
• What if you give yourself the freedom to learn each lesson and just keep creating the next experiment?

“Life is like the ocean.  We can’t control the tide, so we might as well learn to surf”  – Unknown

If you are going to learn to surf through your life, how can you learn to catch the perfect wave?  What is the perfect wave?

Turn the tide on mediocrity. 

Break free of the riptide of your past. 

Start living from a “bucket list” instead of existing with a “to do” list.

Never let fears stop you from pursuing your dreams.  Don’t let your fears of what might happen, mean that you don’t make anything happen.