Dreamers make wishes when they blow out the birthday candles with complete confidence they will come true. They blow on the dandelions seeds and spread their wishes all over the world. They wish on the first star they see each night. The secret they know is — we are all just dreamers in an endless universe.
Judith Thurman said, “Every dreamer knows that it is entirely possible to be homesick for a place you’ve never been to, perhaps more homesick than familiar ground.”
Doers take the dreamers up a notch. They believe in the magic, but they also know that it takes a little bit of elbow grease to make the machines run. They know that to take the dream into reality we must put it in writing. We must plant the seeds, water and fertilize them, weed when needed, and watch in amazement as the miracle of growth happens. Doers know that the energy goes when the attention flows, so rather than giving their energy to their fears, they focus their energy on their dreams. They know that action needs to follow the dream.
Sarah Ban Breathnach said, “The world needs dreamers and the world needs doers. But above all, the world needs dreamers who do.”
Thinkers know that they can put the dream on steroids because they realize the power of thought and attitude. It is like strapping a rocket onto the doers goals, when the doer has the right thinking to get the dream off the paper and into reality. The trick is the right amount of thinking, in combination with action.
Creative thinking outside the box produces inspiring ideas that can change the world. Plato said, “Thinking: the talking of the soul with itself.” When we go deep inside ourselves and draw up the dream, enhance it by stripping away all of the negativity about the dream that we have, we become free thinkers who can see without prejudice what the destiny of the dream is. We talk with our souls and see possibilities for the dream everywhere we look. This helps the doer to pick the best door to open to the best opportunities.
That brings us to possibilities. Thomas Edison said, “When you have exhausted all possibilities, remember this: you haven’t.” Since his most famous quote is “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work”, I think that this quote is certainly made by someone who knows it to be absolutely true. If he had not continued his work, then his numerous inventions, most famous being the light bulb would not have been invented. He founded General Electric, had a motion picture and record company in addition to others. All because failure to him was just more information to think about. A part of the process, and not something to be avoided.
I also love the quote by Audrey Hepburn “I M Possible” instead of impossible. Inside each of us is the space where we know. We know, that we know, that we know, that anything that comes into our heart and soul for us to do, is for us to do. And most important, that it is completely possible for us to do.
So greet your dream with open arms, know that the doer and the thinker will show you the endless possibilities for you to bring that dream into reality – then go do it.
How can a fear that eats us alive, also be a great treasure? Marianne Williamson has the best answer I have ever heard to this question.
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. You’re playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.
– Marianne Williamson
As children we freely express ourselves. Our emotions flow through us, one minute we are crying like the world has ended, and the next minute we are smiling and serenely happy with the smallest thing that has grabbed our attention. As we grow older we somehow come under this trance of fearing to be different than everyone else. We feel like we are not good enough, unworthy in some way and we start striving to earn a place at the table.
The human longings that are deep inside of us never go away. They exist across cultures; they exist throughout life . . . , our deepest longing was to know and be known . . . , it’s now also our deepest fear.
– John Ortberg
The great thing is that at any moment we can begin to awaken to the truth of who we are. We can stop pushing our true selves into the dark corner. Instead we can be setting fire to every thought and feeling, burning it up with dragon fire. We can set it free to soar high into the night sky to light up the darkness inside of us. We can free ourselves of thinking that we are not good enough. not pretty enough, not talented enough, or not smart enough. Instead of fearing the bright lights that we are, we can illuminate the night sky, and help those around us realize that they too can set themselves free.
Perhaps all the dragons in our lives are princesses who are only waiting to see us act, just once, with beauty and courage. Perhaps everything that frightens us is, in its deepest essence, something helpless that wants our love.
– Rainer Maria Rilke
It takes a lot of courage to risk being alive without self imposed limits. To express who we are. When I think back to my biggest fears in life, I can see where those fears at times both served to protect me, and at others times caused tremendous harm in my life. The real trick is to discern when the fear is protecting us, and when it is limiting us. Every fear in our life has the potential to become a shadow. A shadow is in every folded up place. It is in those folded up places, that we are not living our life as who we truly are.
I want to unfold. I don’t want to stay folded anywhere, because where I am folded, there I am a lie.
– Rainer Maria Rilke
As we have journeyed down life’s paths, we have all experienced someone putting us down for something we said or did. I remember being ashamed of being an “A” student. All of my friends were making fun of me, saying I thought I was too good to be hanging out with them. I remember getting “B’s” on purpose, so that I could fit in better with my friends.
In every heart there is an inner room, where we can hold our greatest treasures and our deepest pain.
– Marianne Williamson
So for a lot of years as an adult, I would give my ideas at work to someone else, so they could get the credit for it, because I was afraid to be judged as thinking that I was smarter than my fellow employees. This created what is termed a shadow – it was created by my pretending to be someone different than I really was. I thought I was protecting myself. In reality I was hurting myself, because it held me back from being recognized as a valued employee.
Fear is an idea-crippling, experience-crushing, success-stalling inhibitor inflicted only by yourself.
– Stephanie Melish
We all have these gifts or talents that we bury. Our light scares us. So rather than risk being seen, being noticed, letting everyone know how powerful we are – we hide in just existing. The moment that you stop being afraid of being different in some way from everyone else is when you experience true freedom. We don’t realize what a weight that we carry around, hiding from who we really are, until you release it and let it go.
Draw a map. Find a path. Take a breath, and run.
For years I would grow my hair really long, and then I would go get it cut shoulder length and donate it to Locks of Love to make wigs for children with cancer. I always remember how light my head would feel, when I got my long hair cut. It always surprised me how much weight it felt like on my head, but how when I would hold the braid it was so light.
As our fears grown within us, it is like that long hair. We don’t notice the weight we are carrying around. Because it grew slowly, the fear slowly weighted us down. When we release the fear, like the long hair getting cut, we become lighter. The way to release the fear is with love.
The cave you fear to enter holds the treasure you seek. Fear of the unknown is our greatest fear. Many of us would enter a tiger’s lair before we would enter a dark cave. While caution is a useful instinct, we lose many opportunities and much of the adventure of life if we fail to support the curious explorer within us.
– Joseph Campbell
When we are consciously living a life of love for ourselves and others, then we shine our lights brightly because we realize it is our purpose to help others shine their bright lights. The meaning of life is not expressed by the size of our bank accounts, the title we achieve at a job; the fame and fortune that we seek out. The meaning of life lies within us living our lives from that place of love. Letting our lights shine out so that we can share the true treasure of who we are.
Who am I, you ask?
I am made from all the people I’ve encountered and all the things I have experienced.
Inside, I hold the laughter of my friends, the arguments with my parents, the chattering of your children, and the warmth from kind strangers.
Inside, there are stitching’s from cracked hearts, bitter words from heated arguments, music that gets me through, and emotions I cannot convey.
I am made from all these people and moments.
That is who I am.
– Ming D Liu
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Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.
As I learned to love myself, my relationship with everyone changed.
People who lack the clarity, courage, or determination to follow their own dreams will often find ways to discourage yours. Live your truth and don’t EVER stop!
– Dr. Steve Maraboli
Loving myself leads to a clarity of my mind and heart. It gave me the courage to say “no more” hiding behind the masks. To say “no more” living in fear of what others will think of me. To say “yes” to me! The heavy armor I had built around me to protect me was in fact made of fear and stress. As I dropped it all behind me, I was left floating free in joy and freedom.
Love yourself enough to take the actions required for your happiness…, Love yourself enough to cut yourself loose from the ties of the drama-filled-past…, Love yourself enough to move on.
– Dr. Steve Maraboli
I knew in my bones why I was here on earth. I may not always be clear on what to do next, but I am clear as crystal as to where I am going. Clarity of mind is how you find purpose in life. It in turn is linked to clarity of passion, which is the fire of your soul to fulfill your purpose.
Everyone sees the unseen in proportion to the clarity of their heart.
I believe that when we tear down the barriers we have built against loving ourselves, that we dispel the veils of illusion that obscure the direction of our life path. Love is an energy that engages us in life in a whole new way.
Love recognizes no barriers. It jumps hurdles, leaps fences, penetrates walls to arrive at its destination full of hope.
– Maya Angelou
Life is about breaking our own limitations. It is about outgrowing who we were. It is about living our lives, by outgrowing ourselves over and over. It is about being curious and opening doors and finding new paths to explore.
Confidence is the ability to feel beautiful, without needing someone to tell you.
– Mandy Hale
There is a voice that comes from deep inside of you. Sometimes it doesn’t even use words. Instead you feel something in your heart, or in your gut. You just have a knowing about something. Listen to that voice. The voice of intuition is your souls voice. It knows who you really are, without the self judgment, the limiting beliefs, the lies that you have told yourself for years. Instead, look into the mirror, looking into your own eyes, and saying the words below. For me it was the hardest thing I have ever done. It was harder than giving birth without drugs (lol) after nineteen hours of labor.
I am pretty enough (beauty comes in all shapes and sizes)
I am smart enough (I can learn whatever I need to know)
I am talented enough (everyone has their own unique qualities of divine genius, mine is writing)
I am loud enough (my voice is worth being heard)
I am tall enough (3″ heels work wonders)
I am “normal” enough (what is normal anyway?)
I am strong enough ( I know my weaknesses and move forward through them)
I am experienced enough ( I have learned from my mistakes)
I am more than “ENOUGH” for anything and anyone just by being myself
Your heart is the size of an ocean. Go find yourself in its hidden depths.
Life is a journey of first learning to love yourself, and then extending that love to everyone you encounter. It is putting the best possible explanation to every situation. When we truly love ourselves, it tells others how to treat us. While there will be those few people who are so dysfunctional as to take advantage of us, we will receive way more in blessings than we would ever lose.
Once you reunite with your clarity, let it lubricate your parched soul, be the wave you glide on and the energy you give your body to. Allow it to be the friend you become powerfully fearless with, and the very medicine you need to dissolve your empty parts. Let it halt your restless yearning and lead your beautiful heart.
– Victoria Erickson of Rebelle Society
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Some changes look negative on the surface but you will soon realize that space is being created in your life for something new to emerge – Eckhart Tolle
In 1885 the first practical auto was driven down the road. The horse and buggy industry didn’t take notice. They felt that this new fangled invention was just a temporary fad. A few years later this industry discovered they were wrong, as the auto took over the roadways and became the common mode of transportation.
In March of 2009 Uber was founded and it is doing the same thing to the taxi industry. In a few years the same thing will happen with the long-haul trucking industry as driver-less trucks will become the norm.
One of the constants in our world is change. If you aren’t paying attention your industry could be impacted, and you might no longer have an occupation.
Just like these examples, most industries that we know and recognize in a certain way today, will at some point in our future totally change. Most will be caught unaware when it happens.
In our personal lives, the same thing is true. Everyday in some way, you are a new person. In the past 24 hours you have probably learned something new. You have probably changed your mind about something. You realized, due to getting more information, or looking at it in a new way, that maybe what you thought about it wasn’t 100% true.
You outgrew a belief. You adopted a new belief. You released an old belief.
There are moments which mark your life. Moments when you realize nothing will ever be the same and time is divided into two parts, before this, and after this – N. Kazan
Change builds resilience in you. Resilience isn’t being numb to the changes. It means that even though the change you experience may have felt like you are a failure, or hurt you in some way, that you kept going.
It takes courage to let go of what can’t be changed. Sometimes this means that you have to learn a new job skill. Sometimes you have lost an arm, a leg, went blind or deaf. It takes courage to find a new and different way to still be able to live the dreams you have for yourself.
When I was growing up, I realized through hard life lessons that my parents were not, and could not be the foundation of my world.
When I married my husband, I thought that he would be the foundation of my world, and through a hard life lesson, I learned that this was also not true.
Then I thought that God would be the foundation of my world and discovered that this also was not true.
I had to be the foundation of my world. Then on that foundation, I could build my spirituality, my family, my friends, my career, and everything else in my life. But I had to build them upon me, as my own true foundation.
The reason this is true for me, is I had to accept responsibility for just me. I had to accept reality, and not try to push decisions or the results of those decisions on anyone else, including blaming God for what was happening.
I had to be the one. I had to be the “hot coal”. If you have ever had to heat your home with wood or coal, then you know that if you bank the fire at night, it is easy to get going in the morning. This is because underneath the cold looking ashes, lies a hot coal. It is easy to get the fire going again with those hot coals.
There is no way for me to be a perfect woman, but there are a million ways I have can be a good wife, mother, sister, aunt, niece, and friend.
Look around you. Everything changes. Everything on this earth is in a continuous state of evolving, refining, improving, adapting, enhancing . . . , changing. You were not put on this earth to remain stagnant – Dr. Steve Maraboli
You need to be like the hot coal. You don’t want to be like a burning match. When the winds of change blow into your life, if you are the match, you will burn out quickly and die. But the winds of change blowing on the hot coals will cause you to burst into flames of light, and not burn out.
What you believe defines you. What you tell yourself about who you are, how you react to change, is all a part of this definition of who you are.
In the cover photo you see the same tree. The same field. But each section presents a different season, time of day,
When you try to remain safe inside of the box, and resist change, you inhibit the natural growth that is supposed to happen in your life. You in essence become a desert deep inside of yourself. You stop living your life. You stop loving yourself. That is the real tragedy in life. You just stop living and just keep existing.
All you can change is yourself, but sometimes that changes everything – Gary W. Goldstein
It really is up to you how you live your life. You can’t blame anyone else – not your parents, or your spouse, your boss or God. You can choose the green grass – a beautiful life; or you can choose to walk through the dried up dusty abandoned land of blame and abdication of change and the responsibility that it entails.
Sometimes you don’t realize the weight of a burden you’ve been carrying until you feel the weight of its release.
Have you ever had several inches of your hair cut off? For many years I would grow my hair long enough to cut and donate to “Locks of Love”. When they would cut off that much hair, my head would feel so light, like it was floating. It only lasted for a day or two and then the new normal would kick in. The weightlessness feeling would disappear.
Have you ever felt that same way when you left a bad employer? Ended a bad relationship? Walked away from something that was consuming your life in a bad way, like an addiction? Did you feel free? Like a heavy weight had been lifted?
A smile can hide so any feelings; fear, sadness, heartbreak . . but it also shows one other thing: strength.
We all of us sometimes smile, and pretend our world is perfect. When really deep inside, our world is being carried on our backs, and we can see it tipping us over. We can see that we are about to lose it all. We can see it, slipping off our shoulders. It’s like the weight is crushing us to the ground. Why do we do this to ourselves? Why do we take on too much? We don’t ask for help. We don’t want to fail. We don’t want to be seen as needy. We tell ourselves we must be perfect 24/7.
Life’s challenges are not supposed to paralyze you, they’re supposed to help you discover who you are.
– Bernice Johnson Reagan
Maybe what the life challenge is all about, is to teach us that this idea of perfection or not needing any help, will never work long term. It might get you through a challenge or two. But eventually it will become too heavy, and we will fall down. We need to learn to receive as well as give. We need to learn how to unpack our bags. To let go of the things that no longer serve us. We need to look at each item in the bag. Are these socks really ours or do they belong to someone else? What about that ugly top that we hide in the closet, who does that belong to?
We all have baggage, find someone who loves you enough to help you unpack.
I think of the example of going grocery shopping with either a hungry spouse or your children. You are walking down the aisle and getting the items on your list. When you are not looking, they sneak things into the cart. They hide it underneath something already in the cart, so you can’t say no. Then when you get to the check out line, you discover five things in your cart that you didn’t put into it. We are like this in our personal lives. We not only cart around other peoples items in our bags, we pay for them too. That is the best reason to have someone help you unpack. They can help you figure out who those socks and ugly tops actually belong to. They can help you release them back to their true owners.
Travel light, live light, spread the light, be the light.
– Tea Bag Quote
We do this unconsciously for the most part. Part of it comes from the initial wounding experience that you had as a young child, sometime before the age of 8. For some reason so many people I know, including myself, it is age 4. You experienced a childhood trauma, which impacted how you view the world. What also happens is that you take on some of the problems as your own, that came from the other person involved in your wounding.
If you want to fly, you’ve got to give up the things that weighs you down.
– Savannah Smith
For example, in my own case, I walked in on my mom having an affair. As an adult I had a problem with trust. It wasn’t that I didn’t trust others so much as I didn’t trust myself. This caused me to attract untrustworthy people into my life. I finally through years of transformational work discovered that this issue wasn’t about me at all. It was about my mother. When I released this baggage everything in my life shifted, because I finally knew that I could trust myself. I was carrying around a mountain that didn’t even belong to me.
If you wish to travel far and fast, travel light. Take off all your envies, jealousies, unforgiveness, selfishness and fears.
– Glenn Clark
We all do this. When you go camping, they tell you to put your food up in the air between trees so that wild animals can’t get to it. In our backpacks, we have these items that attract the “wild animals”. We attract these experiences into our lives over and over again. We have a pattern of the kind of friends we attract; the kinds of significant others; the kinds of jobs; etc…… Why does the same thing keep happening to us?
Keeping baggage from the past will leave no room for happiness in the future.
– Wayne L Misner
We are attracting it into our life, it is our “wild animal”. What the transformation process does, is it helps us to unpack our backpack. To see what is really inside. What are we carrying that no longer serves us? What are we carrying that belongs to someone else? What grudges, slights, hurts, and painful mountain heavy experiences are we carrying in our backpack?
It’s not the heavy load that breaks you, it’s the way you carry it.
– Lena Horne
We are only meant to carry the load for a short time. The time of the experience happening. Not months and years later. The weight of the past must be released. You are meant to find the gold, and let go of the rest of the boulder. Refocus on where you are headed.
Even the boulder that you are currently carrying, that you are trying to find the gold in. The weight of that boulder can be lessened if you confine it to the lesson itself. Sometimes we take the lesson to mean that we can’t do anything right. That our whole life has been one failure after another. That we are doomed. That our existence itself is a burden. None of those things are ever true. It is our mind pressing down from the weight of every single burden we have ever carried, into one gigantic mountain.
When I accept myself, I am freed from the burden of needing you to accept me.
You need to give yourself the gift of forgiveness. The gift of compassion. The gift of redemption. The gift of letting go. Get a piece of paper and start unpacking your backpack. Write down every untold story that you have inside of your heart. For years I blamed myself for my parents divorce. If only I hadn’t opened her bedroom door, I wouldn’t have uncovered her dark secrets, and my parents would still be married. But the truth is that had nothing to do with me, and was the result of their bad decisions and choices over which I had no power. We all have these stories inside of us that must be released. That must be unpacked and let go of.
So stop carrying the mountain. Unpack your backpack. Release the weight of the past.
Always pray to have eyes that see the best, a heart that forgives the worst, a mind that forgets the bad, and a soul that never loses faith.
Give yourself the gift of seeing the best things in your backpack. Of forgiving the worst things that you blame yourself for. Of forgiving the bad things that happened to you, so that you don’t carry the weight of other peoples sins inside of you. And never lose faith that everything in your life can serve you, if you give yourself the gift of love and forgiveness.
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I just wanted to take a moment to thank all of you for becoming part of our community. Thank you for taking the time to read our posts. For commenting and liking them and most of all for sharing them with others.
I wanted to let you know that you have all become special to me, because through you I have realized that I am not the only one who thinks about what I write. Thanks to you I have realized that there are many people in this world who see the possibilities that our world can become a better place.
I also wanted to take this day for helping me to be able to receive the love that you have shown to me, in encouraging me to continue to write my heart out on this page. I always dreamed of being a writer, since I was a very small girl. But I didn’t think that I had any talent. I didn’t think that what I wanted to talk about, was anything that anyone would want to read. You have no idea of the joy you have brought into my life.
Thank you! You are a blessing in my life. We are a blessing to each other.
When I look at this picture, I see a little boy with big dreams. But when he looks out over the city in the moonlight, I think that he is overwhelmed by the vastness of the city. The moon is large and full and seems to be almost overpowering.
When you have these big dreams, it is easy to look out and see that we are just a small insignificant thing that will probably have little or no impact on the world. That is when doubt starts creeping in. Then it is joined in by those parts of us that try to protect us from harm, as well as friends and family that are trying to protect us.
The voices yammer inside our head that we will look foolish. We will be laughed at as failures. Who do we think we are? Do we really think so much of ourselves that we alone have the answer to even one of life’s problems? If this idea we had was valid they whisper, then someone would have done it a long time ago.
I know that our parents want to protect us and sometimes in trying to do that they crush our dreams. Teachers may have told us that we were not smart enough or talented enough and so we give up on our dreams, and because we think that they must know – they are older and know more than we do, we follow the advice and give up.
We may have bosses that belittled our idea once when we shared it, so we closed up like a clam shell, never to speak out an idea again.
Many times our ideas scare our friends into thinking that we will outgrow them and leave them behind, so they tell us to not even try – they tell us it is too hard, you don’t have the money, influence or power to make a difference. Don’t speak up or you might get ostracized.
The voices inside/outside of us come from many directions at once and so we freeze and do nothing. I think that one of my favorite men who talked about dreams was Martin Luther King Jr. When he started I can’t imagine that he knew what a difference he was going to make in our world. He must have been overwhelmed many times by the enormity of what he wanted to do. He inspired many to stand beside him, and his legacy goes on today as we remember him and his work every year.
“Dream big and dare to fail.” Norman Vaughan Failures are not a thing to be avoided. Some big companies like Google get this and encourage failure. Failures are great teaching tools and even create shortcuts to success. Release the fear of failure, the habit of being a perfectionist. Those things are the true obstacles. “It’s the possibility of having a dream come true that makes life interesting.” Paulo Coelho
Dreams take on lives of their own when they are divinely inspired. They grow inside of us and spread out to everyone, to inspire them to join with us and help grow the dream. The dream didn’t start with us, and it will not end with us. We are like a runner in a relay baton race, getting passed the baton to continue onto the next person who will be inspired to continue running with the dream. The dream can’t be stopped, because it has a life of it’s own.
Our dreams live on, still free, still inspiring others to take up the baton in the race and be brave. Martin Luther King Jr.’s dream still lives on. He wasn’t the first person to take that baton up, and he wasn’t the last one.
Whatever dream lives inside of you, take up the baton and join in the divinely inspired race. And when it is time to pass on the baton, know that your dream will live on through those that you were able to inspire to take up the baton and continue the race.
In the world, in this moment, many are being overcome with fears. Fears of the pandemic. Fears of losing your elderly loved ones to illness and disease. Fears can be based on past experience, of knowledge of something that has happened in the past. This past fear is then projected into the immediate future of a danger that is seeking you.
Instead, Take a deep breath. Just be aware and conscious of just this single moment. This moment of inhalation or exhalation of your breath. When you just concentrate on your breathing, you see how to live outside of this kind of fear.
In this moment, you are alive, breathing. Your eyes are taking in what is around you. Your ears are hearing sounds both from near and far. You feel the softness of the material of the clothes you are wearing. Maybe the way the tag on the collar of your shirt irritates your skin. You think to yourself that you have to remember to use the scissors and cut that tag off.
If you have been outside, you might feel the rain drenched softness of the ground under your feet. The soft dirt clings to the bottom of shoes as you sink into it with each step. You smell the scent of rosemary as you walk along the path, its heady scent drifting on the breeze. The sounds of the waves crashing down on the shore drowns out the call of the sea gulls, as they ride the air currents high above you. You are awake and aware of the wonder of life itself.
If are in a state of fear, you won’t be aware of any of the sounds or smells of nature around you. So, your choice in this moment is are you to be overcome with fear, or filled with wonder?
Think of those advertisements you might see for going to Disneyland or Disneyworld. They are filled with the young children who can’t sleep because tomorrow is the special day when they enter the world of magic. Their faces are the epitome of excitement and wonder.
When was the last time, that look was on your face? The last time when you dropped the heavy burden of fears, and beheld the magic of life? This photo reflects the majesty of our world, the beauty of creation and it is how you behold the wonder of life.
Remember the movie “Dune”? The line around fear has stayed with me, Frank Herbert was a master with this thought around fear.
Fear is something that you can’t run away from. Running away only puts more distance between you and the solution to your fear. The only way to deal with fear, is to face the illusions that it brings. You can only be fearless, when you learn to recognize the illusions from what is true and real.
“Fear is not in the habit of speaking truth; when perfect sincerity is expected, perfect freedom must be allowed; nor has anyone who is apt to be angry when he hears the truth, any cause to wonder that he does not hear it” – Tacitus
Isn’t that something to wonder about? This concept that you create the fears out of your own illusions, is something to think deeply about. Illusions usually come from thinking that there isn’t enough of something that you want.
Not enough money, not enough jobs, not enough food, not enough of . . , what would happen to your fears if you could sincerely and honestly allowed a moment of perfect freedom into your world? If you could truly believe that there is more than enough, and it is just waiting for you to step out of the illusion to get it?
I couldn’t find the person who wrote the “Reality of Fear”, but I loved it. It captures the illusion of fear, in that it convinces you that the lie is truth.
You are scared of the dark it says, when really what you’re scared of is what you have projected into that darkness. You can’t see in that darkness, the possibilities of what might be there. A thief will rob you. A killer will murder you.
Your mind freezes us with “what if’s”. And the “what if’s” are made up in your mind. The monster under the bed is actually the fears in your mind, manifesting the illusion into something appearing real.
Reality of Fear
You’re are not scared of the dark . . . you’re scared of what’s in it
You’re not afraid of heights . . . you’re afraid of falling
You’re not afraid of the people around you . . . you’re afraid of rejection
You’re not afraid of love . . . you’re afraid of not being loved
You’re not afraid to let go . . . you’re afraid to accept the reality that its gone
You’re not afraid to try again . . . you’re just afraid of getting hurt for the same reason
The hardest thing is to really know yourself. You are kind of like one of those hidden drawers in a roll top desk. There are a lot of things to see on the desk, which is how you show up in the world. It hides all of the physical aspects of the desk. Then when you start looking at the desk itself, and open the roll top there is another layer of things to get distracted by. All of the obvious nooks and crannies and drawers.
If you really examine the desk inch by inch you discover that something seems to be a little off. Being curious you start pushing and pulling on the wood of the desk. Inch by inch your fingers keep looking for the hidden lever, until the hidden drawer suddenly pops open. You’ve found the real you. It takes concentration, patience and the ability to be curious instead of judgmental.
“Knowing others is wisdom. Knowing yourself is enlightenment” – Lao Tzu
So what does this really mean? Taking this even a step further, is accepting what you discover about yourself.
“When you know yourself, you are empowered. When you accept yourself, you are invincible” – Tina Lifford
For me, it is how as children you are taught what being successful is. You are taught to get good grades. You are taught to go for higher education for a particular type of job. Medical fields, teaching fields, computer science fields and so on. You are taught to excel in school and then go to work and excel in your chosen profession. In school I was lucky enough to have an amazing teacher who taught me to take concepts apart to truly understand what they meant. To use the How, What, Why kinds of questions to explore what it really means.
“Know who you are. Know what you want. Know what you deserve. And don’t settle for less” – Tony Gaskins
What you should do first is really understand yourself. Know what your passions are in life. What lights you up and makes you happy? Having a healthy self esteem, that really knows what your values and talents are. Most importantly, what your personal genius is. Once you have identified those, you know who you are at your core being. What makes you happy. How you can best serve others.
Then it is up to you to go out and find the profession that meets all of the criteria. Instead you have been so busy being educated, that you missed the importance of self knowledge in the equation. Instead, you have navigated or simply stumbled into a profession that is not a true calling. It’s a paycheck.
How did you choose that profession? Maybe on the advice of a favorite teacher. Maybe you were steered by your parents into what they felt was a financially rewarding career. Maybe it was for the glamour of the profession. In Hollywood many careers are based on dreams of being a Emmy awarded singer, or winning an Oscar. If it is truly your “dream job”, would you do it even if they didn’t pay you?
What did you really know about this profession before you entered it? What illusions did you have about what your profession would give back to you? How did your passion and purpose play into this profession? What about your personal genius? That thing you do that is so easy for you, that you don’t understand why everyone can’t do it? Does it fulfill your divine destiny? Clarity is powerful. Pay attention to day dreams, where your mind wanders is an important clue to what you are really seeking in life.
“Are we living our dream? Or are we living somebody else’s dream?” – Arianne Huffington
Truly knowing who you are requires a toughness of the soul. Knowing yourself in all of the ways that matter, means that you:
“You have to love yourself, because no amount of love from others is sufficient to full the yearning that your soul requires from you” – Dobinsky
The world needs you to know yourself, be yourself, love yourself and trust yourself. It is the only way to get from who you are, to who you want to be. It is the only way to figure our what you need to shift, change, release and transform to get to where you want to be. Knowing yourself isn’t easy. It is usually messy, not pretty.
It is about accepting the parts of yourself that even you are hiding from. It is stripping away the stories that you tell, that whitewash your less than stellar qualities. It is about taking down the illusions, removing the cloaks of invisibility and loving what remains. Own the place of your soul. Stand tall and take inventory. Then shift and change and transform into the best version of you. It isn’t easy, but it is priceless.
“Here’s the truth: people who get what they want tend to be the ones to make the effort to know what they want” – Martha Beck
In many shamanic societies, if you came to a shaman or medicine person complaining of being depressed or dispirited, they would ask the following four questions:
When did you stop dancing?
When did you stop singing?
When did you stop being enchanted by stories?
When did you stop finding comfort in the sweet territory of silence?
When I read George Carlin’s quote I thought of the above words – because the wolves being silent at the moon, and the moon howling back – this spoke to me of a wolf being dispirited and the moon howling back those questions.
This quote by George Carlin with the wolves being silent also reminded me of a time of reflection. Being silent and going within to review the actions of the year. A time to release the baggage of the past.
And you were just like the moon, so lonely, so full of imperfections, but just like the moon, you shined in times of darkness – Unknown
Every January we think of the new year’s goals or resolutions, new dreams to grow into our lives. The things we want to accomplish or bring into our lives. In order to be ready for that contemplation, you need to create a clean slate.
A good way to do that is to examine what you set out to do last year, what happened along the way, and what you need to acknowledge and release.
Part of what can be released is all of those dreams that didn’t happen. You can mourn and release those dreams that no longer are a part of your life, because you have outgrown them.
We all have shadows within us. Dark places where you hide the things you don’t want to face. Where you hide things you are ashamed of. These things need to be brought into the light. You need to release them, so that they can become what they were meant to be. They are the broken bits of you, the dreams you abandoned because of someone or something that hurt you.
You can also release any toxic relationships that have ended or need to now end. Release the darkness.
And like the moon, she had a side of her so dark, that even the stars couldn’t shine on it; she had a side of her so cold, that even the sun couldn’t burn on it – Abigail J
I have always thought the saying is so true, “We make plans, God laughs”. This is because you tend to make plans that you feel safe about, things you know that you can do. Those kinds of plans don’t grow you or accomplish all that you are capable of doing. So, God laughs because he will take those plans, tear them apart and rebuild them into better ones. Those are the unanswered prayers, the dreams that won’t grow you towards your destiny.
Throughout the year you can look for those examples, where your small safe plan, was revised with divine humor into a much bigger plan.
Or it might be that because you didn’t do a release from last year, that this year’s plans have not even got off the ground.
Look not for the desires you have, for they are simply things that you want in your life. Look for what your soul longs for. What each heartbeat is sending to you, telling you that THIS IS WHY YOU ARE HERE!
When the wolf howls at the moon, you can hear the yearning in his voice. Give your own yearning a voice in your life.
Don’t tell me the sky’s the limit when there are footprints on the moon – Paul Brandt
So with the next full moon, you can again review, release, and restore life. Every quarter, the moon will usher in a new season. That is a perfect time to release the old, failed, or aborted dreams, and plan anew.
We dance for laughter,
we dance for tears,
we dance for madness,
we dance for fears,
we dance for hopes,
we dance for dreams,
we are the dancers, we create dreams.
One of my all-time favorite songs is “Moondance” by Van Morrison. I love the summer and autumn nights of a full moon. With a warm breeze blowing and sitting on a sandy beach, watching the moon rise over the water – there isn’t a better feeling. You can feel the magic of the night strumming your heart strings.
“The dark does not destroy the light; it defines it. It’s our fear of the dark that casts our joy into the shadows” – Brene Brown
Anytime you feel like life is giving you too much to handle, that you can’t take one more thing, that is the time to step outside of the drama and trauma. To ask yourself a very vital question. “What is this experience awakening within me?” You would not be going through this experience unless the divine knew it would open you up. It is up to you to figure out what you are being opened up to. Even the shadows have wisdom to share with you.
“Run my dear from anything that may not strengthen your precious, budding wings. Run like hell my dear, from anyone likely to put a sharp knife into the sacred tender vision of your beautiful heart” – Hafiz
When you come up against your secret deepest fears. When fear is invading your body and flaying you alive. That is when it is vital that you have the courage to be willing to fall. It is in the surrender to “I am failing”; when your heart is torn and beaten; that is how you find out how far you can rise up.
It is in the “let go and let God”, in the surrender to the divine will or destiny. That is when everything changes. Until then you are in a fight inside of, and with yourself.
Facing your fears is like walking through a crowded room with all of these shadows of people. They seem to have substance, reality. They are talking, but their whispers fade away as you try to listen. They appear to be making perfect arguments, and logical deductions. Yet they are simply shadows, and they disappear as you put one foot in front of the other and simply walk through them.
“Courage is more exhilarating than fear, and in the long run it is easier. We do not have to become heroes overnight. Just a step at a time, meeting each thing that comes up, seeing it is not as dreadful as it appeared, discovering we have the strength to stare it down” – Eleanor Roosevelt
They have no substance, because they are based on projections of what “might” happen. When you take the time to face them and shine a light upon them, they fade away. The truth is that you’re worrying about what might happen, can’t change or alter what tomorrow brings. What it does, is to make your today heart breaking. It isn’t failure that you should be afraid of. It is doing nothing and having nothing change in your life that is truly heart breaking.
There is a Swedish Proverb that says, “Worry often gives a small thing a big shadow”. Worry stops you from making the right choices. It stops you from being the brilliant, funny, entertaining “light up my life” person that you are meant to be. It bleeds away your courage to get up and take action. It drains you, instead of fueling your passion to get stuff done.
“Ask yourself if you’re certain – do you really want it? When you’re certain, desire will transform you into a racehorse, explosive at the gate. When you’re certain, details and obstacles will noticeably shrink, and crumble away. Excuses will die, ecstatic determination will strengthen your drive, and the sheer power of intent will rattle your lands and skies. Are you truly certain? Then call it out. Claim it as yours. Do what you need to do each and every day, to let it know you’re ready, you can see it, and that you’re on your way. Now is the time. Your dream patiently awaits” – Victoria Erickson
When you are courageous you spark the souls of others and ignite the bravery in them. That is why you love to read the stories of those who conquer their fears. It lights up the coals inside of you that are in danger of going out. It re-ignites you to push forward once more.
The moon calls to the tides, beckoning the waves to reach the shore and having gently kissed the sand, they return to the depths. To release what no longer serves the ocean to the shoreline. The shoreline makes space for something new that is coming in on the tides.
When I am moving towards my own passion and purpose in life, my purpose in life moves towards me. Like the ocean waves entering and leaving, my passion and purpose ebbs and flows. Courage is the foundation on which fears can be met.
“You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing which you think you cannot do” – Eleanor Roosevelt
This foundation helps you to take the risk of leaping forward, even though you don’t know where you will land. It is the foundation that helps you to be compassionate with yourself when you have the rough landing that breaks you into pieces. It gives you the strength to put yourself back together again, and venture forth one more time.
You must dare to live a life that is more than just a daily existence. To understand that sometimes in order for something new to come into existence, fire is required to crack the old hard shell of your life. You can then see the potential of who, and what you are. You can see what you can accomplish, only if you keep trying.
“Becoming fearless isn’t the point. That’s impossible. It’s learning how to control your fear, and how to be free from it” – Veronica Roth, Divergent
You all have these wonderful talents, these personal geniuses that are just waiting for you to have the courage to follow them down the trail of mastery. It is in risking the fire, stepping across the threshold into the unknown, that is when you discover your true voice.
“Faith is the strength by which a shattered world, shall emerge into the light” – Helen Keller
What are your dreams, visions, your life purpose? Are you on track to bring them into reality and complete them? Have you allowed distractions to sidetrack you? Are you unclear on what your life purpose is or how to bring it into reality?