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Remove The Boundaries And Make Your Dreams A Reality

In 2013, in Oregon, teenage sisters Hanna (age 16) & Haylee (age 14) lifted a tractor to save their father pinned underneath.

In 2015, in St. John’s, Newfoundland, Nick Williams lifted a four-wheel-drive vehicle to save a young boy pinned beneath its tire.

In 2015, in Vienna, Virginia, Charlotte Heffelmire was able to momentarily use incredible strength to free her dad from a GMC pick-up truck.

“The only thing limiting us in life is our belief that there are limits” – unknown

What do these three things have in common?

They are what you call miracles, extreme feats of strength. Adrenaline on overload. What they demonstrate is that the rules, boundaries and limitations don’t exist.

Why? Because you can blast through them, when you don’t stop to think about it. These examples show people who did something their logical minds would have told them was impossible. But because someone they loved was in danger, they did the impossible.

There was a commercial at Super Bowl XLIX for Always #LikeAGirl. In the video an adult female shows them what it’s like to run like a girl, then a young female teen, and preteen female and last a little girl. The older girls ran in an unreal way that was weak and ineffective. The younger girls ran as fast as they could. The commercial highlighted the fact that most women when they hit puberty, take in limitations to what they can do and be. 

“Our beliefs are just thoughts with emotions tied to them that we’ve taught ourselves to believe are true” –   JV Crum III

As teenagers, in order to fit in, you started holding back on what you were capable of.  75-80% of your negative thinking patterns come from negative beliefs that you have made up about yourself. 

When I started school, I was four years old, turning five in November.  I entered first grade, because my school didn’t have a kindergarten.  So, I was very small and always 1-2 years younger than everyone else in my grade. 

I was chosen last for any sport activity.  I formed the belief that I wasn’t good at sports.  Because of this belief, I never tried.  To this day, I am not active in any sports.  This is just a belief, and only my reality as long as I let it be. 

Ernestine Shepard, is a body builder.  She believes that age is nothing but a number.  Because of that belief she is doing some amazing things.  When she was 56 years old she decided to become a body builder.  In 2010 she entered the Guinness Book of World Records as the oldest female body builder.  At 83 years old she is still going strong.  “I am out running/walking at 3:30 a.m. in the morning with a group of people, seven days a week,” Ernestine told the Miami Times. “I eat very healthy and eat five meals a day every day. My gym schedule consists of going five days a week and doing a variation of 100 sit-ups per day.”

She has been on Oprah and recognized throughout the world for what she is doing. She teaches an Energy Fitness Class at a gym.  She has a video created by Prevention Magazine.  She is an excellent example of how it is never to late to take a negative belief about yourself, and break through any self imposed limitation with a new positive belief.

“Don’t limit yourself.  Many people limit themselves to what they think they can do.  You can go as far as your mind lets you.  What you believe, remember, you can achieve”  – Mary Kay Ash

All of us continue to allow limitations to rule our lives as adults. Some limiting beliefs are conscious and some unconscious. You need to realize that it is all just an illusion, a false belief of your imagination.

At one time there was a saying that if God meant for man to fly, he would have been given wings. The Wright Brothers refused to allow that limiting belief keep them from their dreams. 

Your beliefs challenge you to get creative.  You can choose to rise up and create what is needed to be successful.  Failures come when instead of rising up, your mind creates road blocks.  Your mind comes up with all of the perfectly good reasons why it can’t possibly work.  Why you are “not enough” of something to make it happen.  This path of limited thinking leads to failure.

People with boundary problems have distorted attitudes about who is responsible for failures in their life.

  • Your parents made mistakes in how you were raised.
  • Your have relationships right now don’t allow you the freedom you need to be successful.
  • You don’t have a college degree.
  • You are poor.
  • Someone is out to get you at work.

The excuses list could go on and on.   The truth is that you have built boundaries all around your excuses and painted yourself into the proverbial corner.  The corner is limiting, but it feels safe.  You lack the courage to step over the line and actually risk pursuing something you want.  You are just plain afraid of any change in your life.  It happens to everyone all the time.

“Boundaries are for those who are too afraid to take the leap”  – quoted from @Business Beware


If you accept a limiting belief, it will become your truth.  What walls have you built over the door of opportunity that you are ready to blast into bits? What limiting belief are you ready to let go of?

Share with us your limiting belief that you are letting go of.   Your share will help all of us to do the same.

Never Be Afraid To Try Something New, Turn The Page

_There comes a day when you realize turning the page is the best feeling in the world, because you%2 (1)I used to work for a company that owned hospitals and healthcare centers, doing accounting.  The majority partner in the business would have the same order for lunch, every single day.  A turkey sandwich with potato chips.  Every single day, he ate the same lunch.  They ordered lunch from TGIF, so it wasn’t like he didn’t have any other options.

I think many of us live in a rut.  Stuck in a groove we can’t get out of, whether it’s our job, family drama or the little frustrations of everyday life.    – Brian Pinkerton

I always wondered if he ate the same breakfast every morning, and the same dinner every evening.  He was definitely a man stuck in a rut.  Rush Limbaugh says that when you are in this experience, you “are out of contact with your own genius”.   You have had this happen in your life at some point and time.  The rut is a place of safety.   You may have had a fear of the unknown, so the rut was a place of safety, because it is always the same.  When you turn the page, who knows what might happen?

So what Zella is telling us, is that being in a rut, can actually be part of the journey – the point is once you recognize that you are stuck, then you can start going backwards, or forging ahead out of the rut.  That you can blaze your own trail off the beaten path to your destination. That you can escape the rut.  That you can get back in contact with your personal genius.  This is because living your life on purpose through your personal genius, is when you know that you are home.

Changing a behavior is like driving down an old, rutted, dirt road.  In order to get out of the rut and onto a new path, you need to jerk the wheel really hard.  If you don’t jerk the wheel hard enough, you’ll just bounce right back on the same, old, rutted path.  So for change to happen, hold on tight, jerk that wheel as hard as you can and get ready for a happy ride.  Change is just beyond, on the other side.    – Perfectharmonysolutions.com

When you listen to your personal genius, your souls voice, it leads you to amazing places.  You find yourself living and doing things that previously you would only read about.  Things that you could never imagine yourself doing. It is a conscious choice to listen to this voice that emanates from deep within.

We’ve all been there.  The stress of moving your household.  First packing then unpacking.  It is exhausting, bad breaking labor.  Or not?  Maybe it’s a chance to play outside the box of go, go, go and instead find the joy in the moment.  That is a totally inside job.

The choices that come from the outside are harder to deal with.  The tragedy knocks you down and makes you a victim.  Even the blessing, is a harder choice, because the blessing usually starts out like the tragedy. It becomes the blessing because you realize that you were stuck and needed your world turned upside down to shake you loose.  The result of the blessing is that you took life’s lemons and made them into lemonade.

Being stuck in the past is like walking forward with your back facing front.  You’ll always miss out on what’s in front of you.   –  thedailyquotes.com

How do you recognize that you are in a rut?  One sign is reliving the past.  It happens because you were comfortable there.  You may complain about it, but you make no movement to actually change it.  Another is repeating the past mistakes over and over again.  Why do you repeat patterns of mistakes?  Because you have convinced yourself that this time will be different.  My mom was married five times, and every single man she married, she met in the bar that she was working in.  One of the things that every single man had in common?  They were all alcoholics.  I remember telling her as a teenager, that maybe if she met men some place besides work, it might work out better?

You must learn a new way to think, before you can master a new way to be.   – Marianne Williamson

This is how you get out of the rut.  You don’t try to solve problems in your life with the same thinking that created them.  You step up and out of the rut.  And you begin blazing a new trail.  So instead of stepping backward into the rut, step forward into growth.  See where life is taking you.  Listen to the voice of your soul, and wake up.  Live your life with the intention to grow, live your life from your true reason and purpose for being here, and love your life with a passion that is on fire!

Choices, Chances, Changes

_Failure I can live with. Not trying is what I can't handle._ SanyaRichardsRoss (1)Win as if you were used to it, lose as if you enjoyed it for a change.

  – Ralph Waldo Emerson

At some point in our childhood we start looking at trying and failing, as being a loser,  because we did not do it perfectly the first time we tried.   A baby learns how to roll over; then crawl; then walk.  A baby learns how to say words.  Think of any 1 – 2 year old and they do not pronounce each word perfectly.  I remember my boys saying truck, but the “T” blended with the “R” sounded like an “F” and peoples heads would turn when they said the word, like they were swearing.  My boys didn’t decide that because they couldn’t say the word perfectly the first time, that they would never attempt to say the word again.  A baby who stands up for the first time and then plops back down on their bum doesn’t decide that crawling is safer, so that is all they are going to do forever.

If you believe the doubts in your mind you won’t achieve the dreams in your heart.

  – Marinela Reka

A girlfriend and I were discussing this, and I thought that it must have something to do with peer pressure.  When we enter daycare or some other classroom experience and discover that some kids can do things better than we can.  At some point the comparison starts shutting us down.  We don’t want to risk the possibility of being wrong, so we don’t raise our hands when the teacher asks the class a question.  We put a label on not being perfect, as being a total failure.  In our minds we see kids with mean faces, laughing at us.  Or maybe we see our parents or teachers telling us that we are just stupid or dumb.  That we can’t learn anything.  That we will never be anything.

Failure is not the opposite of success; it’s a stepping stone to success.

  – Elli Stassinopoulos

What if we were to consciously try to change that meaning in our own head.  What if failure is part of success and something to be enjoyed?  Just as much as we celebrate crossing the finish line in a race as the winner, we were to celebrate crossing the finish line even 1 second faster than we had before, even if it was 100th place in the race? 

Winston Churchill had that kind of thinking.  I think that if he had been of a different mentality, WWII for England might have turned out differently.  One of my favorite quotes of his –

Success is going from failure to failure without a loss of enthusiasm.

  –  Winston Churchill 

The reality of the situation is that each time we try something new, it is going to be full of things that we can do differently to be more successful the next time.  They say that it takes 10,000 hours to become a master of something.  So each time we do it, we are a little more successful.  We can look at what happened and determine what we can shift, take out, put it, tweak the next time to make it even better.

What makes someone talented successful?  Michael Jordon summed it up with,

I’ve never been afraid to fail.

    – Michael Jordon

We have to be willing to take the leap of faith off the cliff.  We may not land perfectly, but when we replay it in our mind, we can determine what we did, and what we can change.  Then we can go back up to the top and try it again. 

If you’re not prepared to be wrong, you’ll never come up with anything original.

  – Ken Robinson

Everything can be improved.  10,000 tries allows for an awful lot of improvements, step by step.  Step by step, we place each thing that didn’t work as the stones that we step on as we try it one more time.  Failures are part of the process of living a life that is worth living.  It is how we grow, by changing something and trying something new.  True success can only come from doing something new, failing at it and doing it again, just differently.

Never let success get to your head, and never let failure get to your heart.

  – unknown

Like the irritation to the oyster, which gets coated over and over again, each new thing we learn becomes a pearl of priceless beauty.  Can you look back at your life and say thank you, for the mistakes you made that taught you to laugh at yourself?  Those stories that felt painful at the time.  Now they are the funniest stories that you and your friends tell each other.  It always starts with, “Remember when I . . . ” and then ends with laughter.   

Don’t worry about failures, worry about the chances you miss when you don’t even try.

  –  Jack Canfield

How many opportunities in our life have we walked past, because we were afraid to try? There is nothing worse than a life that you didn’t even try to live.  That is where the true regrets in your life come from.  The things you did not do.

Love this quote (which didn’t have who wrote it, so unknown)

I AM STRONG

because I know my Weaknesses

I AM BEAUTIFUL

because I am aware of my Flaws

I AM FEARLESS

because  I learnt to recognize, illusion from Real

I AM WISE

because I learn from my Mistakes

I AM A LOVER

because I have felt Hate

and . . . ,

I CAN LAUGH

because I have known Sadness

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Listen To The Heart

lemonademakers club

_It's impossible,_ said pride. _It's risky,_ said experience. _It's pointless,_ said reason. _Give it a tr

What’s life without a little risk?

 – J.K. Rowling

Life is about taking risks.  Every choice is in reality a risk.  A risk of achieving something great and wonderful; a risk of failure; a risk of not doing or doing the right thing.  The great secret of the phrase, “taking a risk”, is that no matter what happens, we get something wonderful.  If we take a risk and it turns out just like we wanted, we are happy.  If we take a risk, and it doesn’t turn out well, we still have something wonderful from the experience, we have knowledge, experience, and the combination of those two things is wisdom.  We can then look at what we tried to do, remove a piece, tinker with it, add something new and try again.  The only way to truly fail, is to do nothing, to risk nothing.

And then there is the most dangerous risk of all – the risk of spending your life not doing what you want on the bet you can buy yourself the freedom to do it later.

 – Randy Komisar

Being wise beyond our fears, means recognizing that the true directions of the heart, require no words. There is simply a knowing inside. It just feels better, when we go in the direction of the heart. When you make the decision based on the hearts guidance, you feel the weight of the decision slide off your shoulders. There is no second guessing.

To live your greatest life, you must first become a leader within yourself.  Take charge of your life.  Begin attracting and manifesting all that you desire in life.

  – Sonia Ricotti

When you say the words out loud, that only your soul has dared to whisper to the heart, that is when miracles happen. The declaration, both verbal and written gives notice to the divine that you are listening. Listen to your dreams. That is when you open to the unexpected, and miracles happen.  When your mind and heart is too filled with the worlds noise, your dreams may be the only way that your souls whisper can be heard by the heart.

Let your heart be your guide on all things, but you have to listen closely because it speaks so softly.

 – John St. Augustine

Each whisper of the soul to your heart speaks of the next leg of your journey. There are times on your journey when experience and reason tell you not to follow that path. Your mind sees the risks and wants to play it safe. But you have to give it a try.  I’ve always loved the play on words – when you find yourself “now here” instead of “no where” is that moment of just being.  That moment of space of being fully conscious, because you have to be fully conscious to hear the whispers of your heart.

Sometimes, you find yourself in the middle of nowhere, and sometimes, in the middle of nowhere, you find yourself.

  – Unknown

When you don’t listen to the whispers of the soul to your heart, sooner or later, that whisper turns into a scream. When the whisper has turned to screaming in desperation, it is usually a sign that your life is about to shift into some sort of test. This comes about because instead of listening to your own heart, you are playing it safe.  Playing it safe, is being a diamond in the ruff.  A raw diamond looks a lot like common quartz, it is cloudy looking..  But cut it perfectly and shine it up, and everyone knows it is a diamond. We all have these exceptional qualities and potential.  But we are afraid to stand out from the crowd, and so we hide ourselves, even from ourselves.  Everybody wants to be a diamond, but very few are willing to get cut.

Take risks in your life.  If you win, you can lead.  If you lose, you can guide.

 – Swami Vivekananda

It is so easy to become focused on others instead of ourselves. We get pushed and pulled in all directions by our work, our friends and our families. When those that we are surrounded by see us listening to our heart, they get scared. Changes that you make in your life, will impact theirs. They are afraid of many things, but primarily that you may out grown them. That you will leave them behind.

The only difference between fear and excitement is your attitude about it.

  – Unknown

Don’t let their fears break your soul. They may try to expose your shadows, your imperfections, the things that lurk inside of you with feelings of shame or guilt.  They are just trying to stop you from listening to the heart. God has put into our hearts, an intuitive guidance system to guide us to what we need, the next step on our path. Follow that guidance. When you do, you will know it because your heart will be at peace. Even the most painful and difficult decisions are correct, if the heart is at peace with it.

Take charge of your choices.  Choose to look up, when life presses you down.  Choose to smile, when life frowns at you.  Choose victory, over defeat.

  – Unknown

Be wise beyond your fears ,and keep heading towards your glorious destiny.  If the dream keeps reappearing in your thoughts, go for it.  That is destiny calling you and it is always worth the price of admission.

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We all Matter

_No matter your social status or how powerful you feel you are, we are all equal. We came here by%

The fact that we are human beings is infinitely more important than all the peculiarities that distinguish human beings from one another – Simone de Beauvoir

When I was a little girl and I was behaving badly, my mom would always say it was because my hair was in my eyes, and I needed to get my bangs cut.  I never did figure out if there really was a correlation between hair in your eyes and bad behavior.  But if there is, then there are a lot of people in the world that need to get their bangs cut.

It seems like the news agencies and our government have gotten into a rut.  A pattern of bad behavior where they are just waiting to maliciously pounce on one another.  They have forgotten their purpose.  They got sidetracked and can’t seem to find their way back to their purpose.

Sometimes the same thing happens to us.  We get sidetracked off on some piece of drama.  As it plays out, we get sucked further and further down that particular rabbit hole.  It’s like when you go into the kitchen to get a drink of water.  Then you notice stuff on the counter that someone got out and didn’t put away.  So, you put it away.  Then you notice dishes in the sink.  So, mumbling about how you have to do it all, you take care of that.  Then you are tired and go back into the living room to sit on the sofa, completely forgetting that you got up to get a glass of water.

Every American deserves to live in freedom, to have his or her privacy respected and a chance to go as far as their ability and effort will take them – regardless of race, gender, ethnicity, or economic circumstances – Christopher Dodd

The world right now if you pay attention to the news seems pretty scary.  It would seem that it is filled with violence, and racial and gender hatred.  For some reason, the news and our political leaders around the world seem to be focused on the small minorities of events that are truly negative.  Nothing is said about the positive things that are going on around us.

In Washington hundreds maybe even thousands of employees are doing a great job, but you don’t hear about their progress, you hear about the negative fighting that is going on within the political parties and even amongst their own parties.

In your local town, the news for 45 minutes will be about every negative thing going on around the world, and then they spend a less than 5 minute segment on someone in the local area that is giving back and helping those in need.  We need to reverse this trend.  Spend more time on the great people all around us that are doing great work helping others.  Celebrate milestones in people’s lives.

It has to begin with peaceful collaborative action.  We as in all of humanity, all matter and we are all equal.  We may have different colors of skin; have different religious beliefs; have different cultures and social and economic backgrounds, but we are still all the same.

We all need to be seen and heard as being a part of our families and communities.  We need to turn towards each other in brotherly love and trust.  We are all one people, and we need to start standing together.

We need to cultivate it like a garden – the gardening science of human relationships.  We need to weed out what is wrong, support what is weak, and prune off anything that isn’t supporting the growth of peace.

We’re All human, aren’t we?  Every human life is worth the same, and worth saving – J.K. Rowling

Each of us has a powerful voice that needs to be heard.  You have the right to speak up when wrongdoing is being done or condoned.  It is the basis of how this country was founded.

Instead of listening to those who seek to tear down your country out of fear, you need to show the world just how powerful a group of people can be when they come from their hearts with peace and love to each other.

We need to transform that fear into love and forgiveness.  The world will be changed by our positive examples of reaching out to each other in love.

You have thoughts and ideas of what can be done to improve our broken system.  You need to listen with both ears to what others are saying.  You need to be slow to speak from the standpoint of making sure that your words are contributing to the discussion, and not tearing it apart.  You need to be part of the solution.  We all want a world without war, conflict or suffering

Prejudice is a burden that confuses the past, threatens the future, and renders the present inaccessible – Maya Angelou

When you see police shootings of unarmed men or women in their pajamas who were just trying to report a possible crime, it is obvious that changes must be made.  Not only laws or procedures, but hearts and minds need to be changed.

If you start with your own heart and mind, seeking to rip out the prejudices and judgements that you have yourself, then we will have made a good start to what needs to be done by every person in our world.

Walls turned sideways are bridges – Angela Davis

Dreams are the Children of your Soul

_Cherish your visions and your dreams, as they are the children of your soul, the blueprints of your%2Every day we have a choice.  We can live in fear or move forward in faith.

  –  Billy Cox

What does it take to realize the visions and dreams our of soul?  It takes faith as Billy said, but it also takes making that faith become real with a solid belief.  That belief then needs to move us forward.  It takes action to start implementing steps that move us forward with the faith, that we can make it a reality.  As we take action, we develop practices and habits to change from where we started.  These actions propel us forward to where we want to go. 

Reach high, for stars lie hidden in your soul.  Dream deep, for every dream precedes the goal.

  – Pamela Vaull Starr

Dreams create transformation in our life.  As we bring our dreams into reality, it requires change.  Some changes come about from letting go of what no longer serves us.  Some changes come about by stripping away who we thought we were, to become who we really are.  As the saying goes, “How does one become a butterfly?  You have to want to fly so much, that you are willing to give up being a caterpillar.”

Dreams are . . .  illustrations from the book your soul is writing about you.

  – Unknown

Since the road of life is not a long flat road, but has hills and valleys, it also will take perseverance. This is because we will run across obstacles on our road.  Some things we can take a detour around; some things we will have to break out the tools to build a bridge over; and some things will require that we climb up and down the mountain.  So to perseverance of not giving up, we also need to add in patience and time, because at least for me everything takes longer than I think it will.

Your dream doesn’t have an expiration date.  Take a deep breath, try again.

  – Unknown

All of these things are required, because at every turn and obstacle fear is going to try to tell us to stop.  That this is not working.  That this dream is too big, too much for us to accomplish.  That look how far we have come – we can rest now and this will be good enough.  Fear will try everything it has to get us to just be happy right where we are. 

Carl Jung adds another piece to the picture that we are painting about dreams. 

Your vision will become clear only when you can look into your own heart.  Who looks outside dreams; who looks inside, awakes.

  – Carl Jung 

Daydreams are outside dreams.  What they call “pipe dreams”, because they are so untethered.  Pipe dreams mesmerize us, as they float by.  They keep us asleep. 

Dreams are answers to questions we haven’t figured out how to ask.

  – Unknown

The dreams of your soul are a totally different kind of dream.  They are the DNA of your soul, the blueprint of what you have been divinely gifted with to achieve in this lifetime.  But in order for us to birth these dreams, and raise them up into the reality of this world, we have to wake up.  We have to become aware.  That is when our life starts to have true meaning.  When we awake to our life’s true purpose.  God speaks to us in dreams.  Dreams of the whispers of the soul.

Dreams are the guiding words of the soul.

  – Carl Jung

That is what made Martin Luther King Jr. speech about “I have a dream” so powerful.  The moment he put down his notes and spoke from his heart, the dream he had been given by the divine came through with such crystal clear clarity that it grabbed the soul of the world.  It was a powerful dream and even though he has passed on from this world, every year we remember this dream.  And even though he is not here to bring it into the full reality of what it can and will be, it is still progressing.  This dream has perseverance.  It keeps on going and it will keep going until it comes into full reality. 

Trust in dreams for in them is hidden the gate to eternity.

  – Kahlil Gibran

We all have a dream inside of us that is just as powerful and just as necessary to this world.  Please, please don’t let the dream die with you.  Bring it out of your heart.  Add the faith, the belief to know that you can change into who you need to be in order to make it a reality.  Know that it will take perseverance, that it will take patience and time, but you can become the person that you need to be to make it happen.

Reach high, for stars lie hidden in your soul.  Dream deep, for every dream precedes the goal.

  – Mother Teresa

I look at my own journey with LemonadeMakers and I can tell you that this dream has changed my life.  That it is constantly challenging me to make more changes to become the person who can not only hold this vision and dream, but to become the person who can shout it from the mountain tops and be heard around the world.  If we all join hands, and collaborate together to change ourselves, we will change the world. 

So many dreams at first seem impossible.  And then they seem improbable.  And then, when we summon the will, they soon become inevitable.

  – Christopher Reeves

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Never Doubt Yourself

When you starting doubting yourself, remember how far you have come. Remember everything you have faced,

In 1952 Florence Chadwick, who had swum the English Channel, tried to swim from Catalina Island to the California coastline. After about 15 hours a thick fog set in and she didn’t think that she could make it. After another hour she asked to be pulled into the boat, giving up. She found out she had stopped one mile from her destination. She later swam the Catalina Channel several times. To face the doubt down, you just have to keep going.

When she looked at how far she had left to go in her imagination, (since the fog prohibited her from seeing the coastline in front of her) it was easy to get discouraged and quit. When you want to quit you start thinking and saying ” I have given all I have”. “No one could do more”. “This far is good enough”. “This is all I can take or handle”.

“Strength does not come from winning.  Your struggles develop your strengths.  When you go through hardships and decide not to surrender, that is strength”  –  Arnold Schwarzenegger

Something important was discovered in the experiment of the biosphere, in regards to trees.  When they first planted the trees they were really excited to see the growth of the trees and how healthy they seemed.  But what they discovered was that without the winds creating resistance for the trees as they grew, their root systems were very shallow and they couldn’t support their upward growth.  They all eventually fell down because the roots couldn’t hold the tree upright.  The same is true for us. 

Have you seen the death crawl scene in the movie, “Facing the Giants”? The high school football player is blindfolded so that he can’t see.  Then another player is placed on the football players back.  He has to crawl on his hands and knees with the weight of that player.  The purpose of the blindfold is so that he can’t see how far he has gone. When you can see how far you have gone, the tendency is to discount it.  You start looking for reasons to quit, because it is too hard.  It epitomizes the strength that you have hidden inside of you.  The strength you hide from yourself, so that you don’t know that it’s even there. 

“Real courage is when you know you’re licked before you begin, but you begin anyway and see it through no matter what” – Harper Lee

When you see a big goal way down the field and what you have to go through to get there, your mind will start in with the negative chatter.  Your mind will find a million reasons, perfect logical reasons, why you can’t do it.  All words describing how it is impossible.  Your friends and family will probably jump on the bandwagon saying that you would be crazy to even attempt it.  Why start something doomed to failure?

In the movie, when the football player goes past the 50 yard line the coach gets excited.  Like a good coach he sees that the player has the strength to go further. He starts crawling in front of him, saying 10 more steps, 10 more steps until the player collapses saying he can’t go farther and it must be that he is at the 50-yard line. In fact, he is in the end zone and just carried another player on his back the entire football field.  Something that everyone, the coach, the other players and the boy would have said was impossible.

“Sometimes it is not the lack of ability, but the lack of confidence that prevents us from achieving what we really want.  Sometimes it’s doable, but self-doubt makes it impossible” – QuotesEmpire.com

You have amazing strength inside of you. You need to carry inside yourself something inspirational that feeds your soul and spirit to keep going. It could be a past victory.  There are many inspirational movies, Rudy, The Rocky Series, this film and I am sure you have your own list that you could continue with.  It could be looking at the miles you have already traveled. It could be the story of a family member.  Everyone needs the positive thinking of “I Can”, “I Will”, “I AM”, to shove aside the doubts and keep going forward into the end zone.

Next time you’re stressed, take a step back, inhale and laugh.  There is something about the breath that can disconnect you from strong emotions.  The old adage, count to 10 works for this reason.

  • Think before you speak.
  • You can take back a thought, you can’t unspeak the words.
  • Remember who you are and why you are here.
  • You’re never given anything in this world that you cannot handle.
  • Even when it feels like you have been broken, you are still ok.
  • Be strong, be flexible, love yourself and have compassion for yourself and others.
  • Always remember to just keep moving forward, – it is always just 10 more steps.
  • Like Dory in  “Finding Nemo”, in the face of adversity, just keep swimming.
  • Don’t stop until you reach the finish line.

“Whenever you find yourself doubting how far you can go, just remember how far you have come.  Remember everything you have faced, all the battles you have won, and all the fears you have overcome” – Unknown

What gives us the courage to keep trying and stretching?  It has to do with your ability to change and transform.  It has to do with your attitude and definitions are around what transformation really means.

“Do you have the patience to wait until your mud settles and the water is clear?  Can you remain unmoving until the right action arises by itself?”  – Lao Tzu

See the  death crawl video at: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-sUKoKQlEC4

Be brave.

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“Running away from your problems is a race that you will never win.” Unknown.

Be brave. Fight for what you believe in, and make your dreams a reality. You are the only one who can. We are who we are, based on the choices that we make.

What is the difference between leaving something that doesn’t serve you and running away? I think it is several things. The realization that there is nothing that you can do to change the situation. You can only change yourself, and if the situation doesn’t change when you do, then it is time to ask yourself “why am I still here?”

Years ago I had interviewed for a new job and was hired. The first hour of my first day at the new job, I knew that I had made a mistake. The owner of the company had a lot of issues with anger and how he treated his employees. He wasn’t the person that I had interviewed with, and when I interviewed he wasn’t in the office. If he had been, I would not have accepted the position. As an example, when he would walk through the office, he would pull out the fax machine paper trays and if the paper wasn’t completely full, he would start yelling and swearing at the receptionist – even if she had filled them up just five minutes before.

The Saturday of my first week there, I had come in the office to set up my desk with the various underwriting guidelines they used for several companies. While I was there, the owner of the company came in and we started talking. I had already worked for an owner like him, and I had sworn I would never allow someone to treat me like that again. So I told him very clearly that the first time he yelled and swore at me, like I had seen him do with others, would be the day I quit.

The day eventually came when it happened. I went into the storage area and grabbed a box, and started putting my personal things in the box. Shocked, he asked me what I was doing. I reminded him of that conversation and said I was quitting. As far as I know, I was the first person that he ever apologized to for his bad behavior, and he never yelled or swore at me again.

Now I needed that job to support my family. But I had made a promise to myself to never let anyone demean me again. It took a tremendous amount of courage to go and grab that box. I was determined to be true to my word to myself. I chose to love myself, over fear of losing the job and income needed to support my family.

So many of us stay in bad relationships – with our employment, our family, our spouse, our friends. We tell ourselves that we have no choice but to stay. But we always have choices. Our happiness starts with us, and how we not only treat ourselves, but how we give permission to others to treat us. I could only make that choice because I loved myself, and trusted that doing the right thing would work out in the end.

The job, the relationships with friends and family, this is not what makes us happy or unhappy. It is how we treat ourselves with our inner voice inside our heads. The way we talk to and about ourselves, is how we give unconscious permission for others to treat us.

Words like, “you are so sensitive, can’t you take a joke?”, or “how stupid can I be?” or, “how naive and gullible you are”, or “You are making things worse, this is all your fault”. “I am always that last choice, never good enough.”

You have to believe that when you leave the wrong people or situations in your life, that the right things will start happening. The only way to get that kind of trust, is to just leap in faith that it will work out. It is like the chicken or the egg scenario, they both happen at the same time.

Paulo Coelho said, “If you’re brave to say “good bye”. life will reward you with a new “hello”. He also said, “You are what you believe yourself to be.” If that is true, what not believe yourself to be brave? Be the person that you are afraid to be, the one that doesn’t fit in, the misfit, the strange one. The words to the song, “Renegades” “long live the pioneers, rebels and mutineers, go forth and have no fears.”

The only way to discover what you are truly capable of, is to take leaps of faith across the chasms and up into the heights of trees. It is what is necessary to push out the boundaries of your comfort zone, or to decrease the size of your tolerance zone, as the case may be.

Refuse to be confined in accepting a mere existence for a life. Existence isn’t real security, but is instead an cage. May your heart be brave, your mind be fierce, and your spirit be free.

Fear is like the Wizard of Oz

Fear is like the Wizard of Oz, projecting itself onto the screen, when in reality it is a small man behind the curtain. Don’t be afraid to move the curtain and expose the fear. Finding the blessing in the fear, is the opportunity to open your heart and mind to the idea of change and reinvention.

Sometimes we consciously choose to change. Other times we stumble upon ( notice the word stumble) an opportunity. Sometimes you trip over something and you catch yourself before the fall, hopping across the floor as you regain your balance. Other times you can trip over something that plants you face on the ground, and has you digging rocks off your skin. Either way there are still choices to make.

Change is an opportunity to reinvent yourself. This is where the stress really hits you fully in the face. Picture the scene in Jurassic Park when the dinosaur screams into the characters face and you can see the hair being blown back by the sheer force of the scream – that is the fear that you feel when presented with the opportunity to reinvent yourself.

The classic opportunities for reinvention tend to come from two things. With a heartbreak such as; losing a job, ending a relationship, the death of a close friend or family member. The classic “good but scary” opportunities for reinvention are; you go away to college, you move to a new town with a new job, you get the really big promotion such as those COO, SEO, CFO types of promotions or the best of all, you decide to be an entrepreneur and your own boss. You fill in the blank that is closest to your life today.

Bringing an idea to life is hard work. You can expect it to cost you more personally, financially, and maybe even reputationally than you thought it would. There are sleepless nights. You become a master of second guessing your choice to make this move.

But like the early explorers in Mexico to truly re-invent yourself you need to burn the boats. Take away the lifeline and go all out for what you are passionate about. Follow your bliss. Look at what is working and not working. What you love to do and hate to do. The key is to get immersed in what you are passionate about and hire help for the rest.

Ways to make it easier: Surround yourself with people who love to learn, share and build. Join or create a mastermind group with people who are putting their ideas into action. Seek out those in your community who solve problems and ask for suggestions. Create that special group of people who will be your cheerleaders, helping you to remain positive and take the risks that need to be taken, instead of holding yourself back.

And remember the three most important words in your fear busting vocabulary: Improvise, Adapt, Overcome

Fear

Don’t let fear hold you back!

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Fear

What do you fear?

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More Important Than Fear

“Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear” – James Neil Hollingworth

I think that “something else is more important” is a tool that I use in my life. It is what has been getting my body out of bed one hour earlier to excercise. Not because I “really” want to, but because if I can’t do this simple thing, then how will I be able to accomplish everything that I want?

I think that this is where the “your why should make you cry” comes into place. It is where all of the obstacles sort of fade away because you are so focused that you don’t see them; fear doesn’t even have a chance to enter into your framework. You are totally in the zone.

I don’t stay in this place 24/7. It is so intense I think that I would burn out. But I do visit it often.