When You Are On Your Souls Path, There Is No Such Thing As A Real Obstacle
We have this idea in life that there are people “out there” who have no problems. That if you have enough money, power, fame, the perfect soul mate – whatever label we put to it, then magically everything in our life would be perfect.
Wanting something is not enough. You must hunger for it. Your motivation must be absolutely compelling in order to overcome the obstacles that will invariably come your way.
– Les Brown
Today in your life there is some sort of obstacle. It could be a small one or a large one. That obstacle might have a few flakes of dirt on you, or you could be covered in the mud from head to toe. What I do know is that if we have the intention, and keep taking just one more step, we will bloom and blossom as we grow. Obstacles make life interesting, overcoming them is what makes life meaningful.
The struggle of life is one of our greatest blessings. It makes us patient, sensitive, and Godlike. It teaches us that although the world is full of suffering, it is also full of the overcoming of it.
– Helen Keller
I love this quote from Goldie Hawn – because she might be one of “those people” that you would put in that category of having a perfect life. She is beautiful, talented, famous and undoubtedly rich, and seems to have a strong relationship with Kurt Russell – yet notice what she says.
The lotus is the most beautiful flower, whose petals open one by one. But it will only grow in the mud. In order to grow and gain wisdom, first you must have the mud — the obstacles of life and its suffering. … The mud speaks of the common ground that humans share, no matter what our stations in life. … Whether we have it all or we have nothing, we are all faced with the same obstacles: sadness, loss, illness, dying and death. If we are to strive as human beings to gain more wisdom, more kindness and more compassion, we must have the intention to grow as a lotus and open each petal one by one.
― Goldie Hawn
We all live in an imperfect world and obstacles are going to show up in our lives. At some point someone that we love is going to grievously dissappoint us. We will lose our grandparents, parents, friends to death. The “trolls” of the world will attack us personally and sometimes viciously. Everyone gets sad and has some depression at some point in their life. The question is not whether you face an obstacle, it is whether that obstacle becomes the picket fence that you surround yourself with and then live your life behind. The “I can’t do that” excuse that we use whenever the obstacles in our life show up.
Bad things do happen; how I respond to them defines my character and the quality of my life. I can choose to sit in perpetual sadness, immobilized by the gravity of my loss, or I can choose to rise from the pain and treasure the most precious gift I have – life itself.
– Walter Anderson
Obstacles teach us just how powerful we are. With each obstacle we get to choose to keep from growing, or to grow from it. My mom was diagnosed with lung cancer and passed away over 20 years ago. She asked that she could die at home and so for the last almost three months I took care of her with my aunt and my mom’s best friend. One of us had to be awake 24/7 because with the amount of morphine she was taking she had hallucinations and would forget she couldn’t get out of her bed. I come from a big family, being the oldest of seven. What was interesting in the last month of her life was how hard it was for my sisters to come see her. Some sisters came once or twice a week, some didn’t show up at all, and some came everyday. At her memorial service some came and some didn’t. When we had a family gathering in the summer to spread her ashes same thing.
We cannot change our past . . . we cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude. I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% of how I react to it. And so it is with you . . . we are in charge of our attitudes.
– Charles R. Swindall
What I discovered is that even though it was hard on me financially (as I took an unpaid leave of absence), even though my husband and kids were far away (we lived in another state), even though it was hard to watch the cancer take her; even though it was hard to see her notice who came to visit and who didn’t – that was the greatest experience for me in so many other ways. But I didn’t see the growth and positive things that were happening until after she had passed. I was so blessed and happy that I did the hard thing.
It is when I struggle that I strengthen. It is when challenged to my core that I learn the depth of who I am.
– Dr. Steve Maraboli
The excuse was that they couldn’t handle it. What I have discovered for me personally, is the reality that I can handle anything I think I can handle. It doesn’t make it easy, but I learned early in life, that obstacles don’t kill you. It sometimes feels like they will. The fears inside me tell me to run and hide. And sometimes I do, but then I turn back around and make myself take one more step. It is always just about taking one more step.
Currently I am facing this obstacle. I keep pushing up against this wall that pushes back. But I know that if I just keep chipping away on it, that at some point I will have weakened the wall enough, that it will fall down. Whenever my life feels as though it is in chaos, I know that I just need to take a breath, ground, and continue doing the small things.
You would free yourself from so much stress and drama if you just understood and embraced the truth that you are enough.
– Dr. Steve Maraboli
I am in Goldie Hawn’s mud at the moment with it. Wrestling with it, but I am determined to overcome. I may have my moments of indecision. I may have my moments of being stuck in the mud. But I don’t unpack and live there. I refocus and keep moving forward, one step at a time. Whenever I get discouraged I look back at previous obstacles and the gifts they brought into my life. I realize they are not my enemy, they are in fact my secret weapon. They are what builds character. They provide me with a purpose and what I need for the next path on my journey.
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The Power Of Pause
You are all so busy, that even in the moments when you aren’t crossing something off your list, you fill in the space with something that still doesn’t allow the space to “JUST BE”. When I am resting I am usually still doing something that I call relaxing, like reading a book or solving a word puzzle. And while those things are relaxing for me, I am still in “doing mode” – beat the puzzle or learn something new from the book.
“Learn to pause or nothing worthwhile will catch up to you” – Doug King
Why is it so hard to “just be”? I love this photo because cats are excellent “just be” creatures. What is the difference between us and the cat in this example? The cats isn’t afraid of:
- I will be irrelevant if I can’t prove you need me every moment
- I won’t measure up to the “super woman” who is the best friend, wife and mother, and corporate executive
- I won’t get everything done
- I am what I do, so I have to be doing every moment
If something isn’t on this list, I am sure that you could add 100 more things that you are afraid of missing, or doing, or being – that stands in your way of “just being”. They even have an acronym for it “FOMO” – fear of missing out. You had it even as a child – it’s the reason why you didn’t want to go to bed. You were sure you were going to miss out on something important.
“Too many people go through life without pausing to enjoy what they have” – David Gemmell
What is just pausing? Being disconnected from the world for just a few minutes. Check into what you are feeling. Quiet your mind. Look around you at the beauty of your surroundings. Ignore just for moment, if the windows need cleaning, that you just spotted a spider web, or there is dust on the piano. It is taking the time to replenish, to give yourself permission to rest and truly relax.
“Something precious is lost if we rush headlong into the details of life without pausing for a moment to pay homage to the mystery of life and the gift of another day” – Kent Nexbum
Why is this so important?
“Taking time to do nothing often brings everything into perspective” – Doe Zantamata
What I find for myself personally, is that when I am avoiding something, I get really busy, usually deep cleaning, which means I take the entire room apart and clean everywhere. I move all of the furniture, I decide that the bookcase needs to go into another room, which means that all of the books get removed, etc….
“Don’t mistake movement for achievement. It’s easy to get faked out by being busy. The question is: “Busy doing what?” – Jim Rohn
You get busy to avoid the thing you don’t want to do. You get busy to avoid the thing you don’t want to face. You get busy and stay busy and ignore the calling of your soul. You don’t want to face this thing, and so you get so busy that you forget it for just a little while.
At any moment you can say enough…, You am not going to avoid this any longer. You can radically change the course of your life, your purpose, your destiny. You have the power, the faith, and the courage to follow your hearts calling. You have the ability to pause, to pray, and to stop and practice deep listening to what your soul is calling you to do. You can pause and just listen.
“Pause and remember – Change will happen the moment you have the courage to change” – Jennifer Young
The courage to change is folded into the realization that every change in your life has been meaningful. Some were life’s lemons and they tore you asunder. You may have thought that they were going to be the end of you. But instead they made you smarter, stronger, and wiser than you were before they blew through your life.
“Sometimes you will never know the value of a moment until it becomes a memory” – Unknown
Other changes were easy and like a light summer breeze came and went without too much commotion. Even so, they changed you in a very meaningful matter. It revived you.
Introspection, reflection, relaxation, they all mean that you have to take a moment, a pause to let your mind wrap around the changes and accept them in a way that moves you forward in progress.
“When things get too messed up, life seems too stressed, and you feel trapped in circumstantial webs. Take a pause, take a breath, break free from all the thoughts and then march ahead” – shrawanidas
So, pause and practice being a cat and JUST BE.
“Your inner child gets It all, believes it all, hopes for it all and is the only guardian worthy of your heart. That child knows that life – which runs on love and feasts on creativity – is on your side, and that the universe conspires with you, not against you, to help you spread that wild, crazy, messy love through your own story. Please, don’t grow up…” – Andrea Belt
Become That Kind Of Woman
What does it mean to be inspired?
The dictionary definition that I like the best is: a divine influence or action on a person believed to qualify him or her to receive and communicate sacred revelation.
I think of it as the act of drawing in breath, breathing in god’s heart and mind.
You don’t always need a plan. Sometimes you just need to breathe, trust, let go and see what happens.
I think of it as the act of drawing in breath, breathing in god’s heart and mind.
You don’t always need a plan. Sometimes you just need to breathe, trust, let go and see what happens.
– Mandy Hale
I believe this is necessary because I believe that most of us put limits on our dreams. It is like when you buy shoes for a child. You don’t buy shoes just for the current size foot they have. You buy them with a little room to grow. Our dreams are meant to grow us, not fit us like a glove. They are meant to expand us, not confine us.
Never forget that you are one of a kind. Never forget that if there weren’t any need for you in all your uniqueness to be on this earth, you wouldn’t be here in the first place. And never forget, no matter how overwhelming life’s challenges and problems seem to be, that one person can make a difference in the world. In fact, it is always because of one person that all changes that matter in the world come about. So be that person.
– R. Buckminster Fuller
Like most of us, I have a dream. LemonadeMakers is my vision that pulls me through each and every day. The space it currently occupies is a wide chasm from where I believe it can go. I know, from the bottom of my soul, that this is why I was born. And if I let my mind go wild, it is terrifying to think of everything that I need to do in order to grow it into what it is meant to do.
That is where inspiration comes in. It gives me the confidence to admit I don’t know it all, but I can find someone who does.
It gives me the courage to think outside the box to figure out a way to get everything done on a shoestring budget. I love the saying that if Plan A doesn’t work there are 25 more letters in the alphabet. Plans that don’t work are how we grow into the person that create Plan X, Y, or Z and become that “overnight” success everyone talks about.
It helps me use my favorite words of improvise, adapt and overcome when I come up against 2 ton boulders that block my way. It gives me super powers to blast those boulders into pebbles and continue on my journey.
It gives me the grace to let someone else take the wheel when I am tired and not think that I have to do it all myself.
The chances of success in any undertaking can always be measured by your belief in yourself.
– Robert Collier
I can still believe in myself, and receive help from others.
It empowers me, refueling my tank when it is low to keep on the path to the next destination. It helps me to realize that I am not perfect and that is ok. That what seems to be the slow journey sometimes is ok. That I deserve the grace of the divine.
It empowers me, refueling my tank when it is low to keep on the path to the next destination. It helps me to realize that I am not perfect and that is ok. That what seems to be the slow journey sometimes is ok. That I deserve the grace of the divine.
A good life is when you assume nothing, do more, need less, smile often, dream big, laugh a lot, and realize how blessed you are.
– Unknown
It challenges me to remember that change is a good word, a positive word, and not something to fear. Every now and then it is helpful to look in your rear view mirror.
Whenever you find yourself doubting how far you can go, just remember how far you have come. Remember everything you have faced, all the battles you have won, and all the fears you have overcome.
– Unknown
We don’t want to live our life from this rear view mirror, but looking at it once in awhile, does bring into focus how much we have changed and grown. It gives us fuel to continue our journey, knowing that more changes are coming.
Success is no accident. It is hard work, perseverance, learning, studying, sacrifice and most of all, love of what you are doing.
– Pele
Greatness in any endeavor comes from the love of what you are doing and being as you continue to challenge life’s expectations of what else is possible.
All your life you are told the things you cannot do. All your life they will say you’re not good enough or strong enough or talented enough. They will say you’re the wrong height or the wrong weight or the wrong type to play this or be this or achieve this. THEY WILL TELL YOU NO. A thousand times no. Until all the no’s become meaningless. All your life they will tell you no. Quite firmly and very quickly, YOU WILL TELL THEM YES.
– Nike
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Our Deepest Fear About Ourself Is Our Deepest Treasure
How can a fear that eats us alive, also be a great treasure? Marianne Williamson has the best answer I have ever heard to this question.
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. You’re playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.
– Marianne Williamson
As children we freely express ourselves. Our emotions flow through us, one minute we are crying like the world has ended, and the next minute we are smiling and serenely happy with the smallest thing that has grabbed our attention. As we grow older we somehow come under this trance of fearing to be different than everyone else. We feel like we are not good enough, unworthy in some way and we start striving to earn a place at the table.
The human longings that are deep inside of us never go away. They exist across cultures; they exist throughout life . . . , our deepest longing was to know and be known . . . , it’s now also our deepest fear.
– John Ortberg
The great thing is that at any moment we can begin to awaken to the truth of who we are. We can stop pushing our true selves into the dark corner. Instead we can be setting fire to every thought and feeling, burning it up with dragon fire. We can set it free to soar high into the night sky to light up the darkness inside of us. We can free ourselves of thinking that we are not good enough. not pretty enough, not talented enough, or not smart enough. Instead of fearing the bright lights that we are, we can illuminate the night sky, and help those around us realize that they too can set themselves free.
Perhaps all the dragons in our lives are princesses who are only waiting to see us act, just once, with beauty and courage. Perhaps everything that frightens us is, in its deepest essence, something helpless that wants our love.
– Rainer Maria Rilke
It takes a lot of courage to risk being alive without self imposed limits. To express who we are. When I think back to my biggest fears in life, I can see where those fears at times both served to protect me, and at others times caused tremendous harm in my life. The real trick is to discern when the fear is protecting us, and when it is limiting us. Every fear in our life has the potential to become a shadow. A shadow is in every folded up place. It is in those folded up places, that we are not living our life as who we truly are.
I want to unfold. I don’t want to stay folded anywhere, because where I am folded, there I am a lie.
– Rainer Maria Rilke
As we have journeyed down life’s paths, we have all experienced someone putting us down for something we said or did. I remember being ashamed of being an “A” student. All of my friends were making fun of me, saying I thought I was too good to be hanging out with them. I remember getting “B’s” on purpose, so that I could fit in better with my friends.
In every heart there is an inner room, where we can hold our greatest treasures and our deepest pain.
– Marianne Williamson
So for a lot of years as an adult, I would give my ideas at work to someone else, so they could get the credit for it, because I was afraid to be judged as thinking that I was smarter than my fellow employees. This created what is termed a shadow – it was created by my pretending to be someone different than I really was. I thought I was protecting myself. In reality I was hurting myself, because it held me back from being recognized as a valued employee.
Fear is an idea-crippling, experience-crushing, success-stalling inhibitor inflicted only by yourself.
– Stephanie Melish
We all have these gifts or talents that we bury. Our light scares us. So rather than risk being seen, being noticed, letting everyone know how powerful we are – we hide in just existing. The moment that you stop being afraid of being different in some way from everyone else is when you experience true freedom. We don’t realize what a weight that we carry around, hiding from who we really are, until you release it and let it go.
Draw a map. Find a path. Take a breath, and run.
– Unknown
For years I would grow my hair really long, and then I would go get it cut shoulder length and donate it to Locks of Love to make wigs for children with cancer. I always remember how light my head would feel, when I got my long hair cut. It always surprised me how much weight it felt like on my head, but how when I would hold the braid it was so light.
As our fears grown within us, it is like that long hair. We don’t notice the weight we are carrying around. Because it grew slowly, the fear slowly weighted us down. When we release the fear, like the long hair getting cut, we become lighter. The way to release the fear is with love.
The cave you fear to enter holds the treasure you seek. Fear of the unknown is our greatest fear. Many of us would enter a tiger’s lair before we would enter a dark cave. While caution is a useful instinct, we lose many opportunities and much of the adventure of life if we fail to support the curious explorer within us.
– Joseph Campbell
When we are consciously living a life of love for ourselves and others, then we shine our lights brightly because we realize it is our purpose to help others shine their bright lights. The meaning of life is not expressed by the size of our bank accounts, the title we achieve at a job; the fame and fortune that we seek out. The meaning of life lies within us living our lives from that place of love. Letting our lights shine out so that we can share the true treasure of who we are.
Who am I, you ask?
I am made from all the people I’ve encountered and all the things I have experienced.
Inside, I hold the laughter of my friends, the arguments with my parents, the chattering of your children, and the warmth from kind strangers.
Inside, there are stitching’s from cracked hearts, bitter words from heated arguments, music that gets me through, and emotions I cannot convey.
I am made from all these people and moments.
That is who I am.
– Ming D Liu
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Challenges Change Everything
Some changes look negative on the surface but you will soon realize that space is being created in your life for something new to emerge – Eckhart Tolle
In 1885 the first practical auto was driven down the road. The horse and buggy industry didn’t take notice. They felt that this new fangled invention was just a temporary fad. A few years later this industry discovered they were wrong, as the auto took over the roadways and became the common mode of transportation.
In March of 2009 Uber was founded and it is doing the same thing to the taxi industry. In a few years the same thing will happen with the long-haul trucking industry as driver-less trucks will become the norm.
One of the constants in our world is change. If you aren’t paying attention your industry could be impacted, and you might no longer have an occupation.
Just like these examples, most industries that we know and recognize in a certain way today, will at some point in our future totally change. Most will be caught unaware when it happens.
In our personal lives, the same thing is true. Everyday in some way, you are a new person. In the past 24 hours you have probably learned something new. You have probably changed your mind about something. You realized, due to getting more information, or looking at it in a new way, that maybe what you thought about it wasn’t 100% true.
You outgrew a belief. You adopted a new belief. You released an old belief.
There are moments which mark your life. Moments when you realize nothing will ever be the same and time is divided into two parts, before this, and after this – N. Kazan
Change builds resilience in you. Resilience isn’t being numb to the changes. It means that even though the change you experience may have felt like you are a failure, or hurt you in some way, that you kept going.
It takes courage to let go of what can’t be changed. Sometimes this means that you have to learn a new job skill. Sometimes you have lost an arm, a leg, went blind or deaf. It takes courage to find a new and different way to still be able to live the dreams you have for yourself.
When I was growing up, I realized through hard life lessons that my parents were not, and could not be the foundation of my world.
When I married my husband, I thought that he would be the foundation of my world, and through a hard life lesson, I learned that this was also not true.
Then I thought that God would be the foundation of my world and discovered that this also was not true.
I had to be the foundation of my world. Then on that foundation, I could build my spirituality, my family, my friends, my career, and everything else in my life. But I had to build them upon me, as my own true foundation.
The reason this is true for me, is I had to accept responsibility for just me. I had to accept reality, and not try to push decisions or the results of those decisions on anyone else, including blaming God for what was happening.
I had to be the one. I had to be the “hot coal”. If you have ever had to heat your home with wood or coal, then you know that if you bank the fire at night, it is easy to get going in the morning. This is because underneath the cold looking ashes, lies a hot coal. It is easy to get the fire going again with those hot coals.
There is no way for me to be a perfect woman, but there are a million ways I have can be a good wife, mother, sister, aunt, niece, and friend.
Look around you. Everything changes. Everything on this earth is in a continuous state of evolving, refining, improving, adapting, enhancing . . . , changing. You were not put on this earth to remain stagnant – Dr. Steve Maraboli
You need to be like the hot coal. You don’t want to be like a burning match. When the winds of change blow into your life, if you are the match, you will burn out quickly and die. But the winds of change blowing on the hot coals will cause you to burst into flames of light, and not burn out.
What you believe defines you. What you tell yourself about who you are, how you react to change, is all a part of this definition of who you are.
In the cover photo you see the same tree. The same field. But each section presents a different season, time of day,
When you try to remain safe inside of the box, and resist change, you inhibit the natural growth that is supposed to happen in your life. You in essence become a desert deep inside of yourself. You stop living your life. You stop loving yourself. That is the real tragedy in life. You just stop living and just keep existing.
All you can change is yourself, but sometimes that changes everything – Gary W. Goldstein
It really is up to you how you live your life. You can’t blame anyone else – not your parents, or your spouse, your boss or God. You can choose the green grass – a beautiful life; or you can choose to walk through the dried up dusty abandoned land of blame and abdication of change and the responsibility that it entails.
What’s In Your Backpack?
Sometimes you don’t realize the weight of a burden you’ve been carrying until you feel the weight of its release.
– Unknown
Have you ever had several inches of your hair cut off? For many years I would grow my hair long enough to cut and donate to “Locks of Love”. When they would cut off that much hair, my head would feel so light, like it was floating. It only lasted for a day or two and then the new normal would kick in. The weightlessness feeling would disappear.
Have you ever felt that same way when you left a bad employer? Ended a bad relationship? Walked away from something that was consuming your life in a bad way, like an addiction? Did you feel free? Like a heavy weight had been lifted?
A smile can hide so any feelings; fear, sadness, heartbreak . . but it also shows one other thing: strength.
– qutoesforbros.com
We all of us sometimes smile, and pretend our world is perfect. When really deep inside, our world is being carried on our backs, and we can see it tipping us over. We can see that we are about to lose it all. We can see it, slipping off our shoulders. It’s like the weight is crushing us to the ground. Why do we do this to ourselves? Why do we take on too much? We don’t ask for help. We don’t want to fail. We don’t want to be seen as needy. We tell ourselves we must be perfect 24/7.
Life’s challenges are not supposed to paralyze you, they’re supposed to help you discover who you are.
– Bernice Johnson Reagan
Maybe what the life challenge is all about, is to teach us that this idea of perfection or not needing any help, will never work long term. It might get you through a challenge or two. But eventually it will become too heavy, and we will fall down. We need to learn to receive as well as give. We need to learn how to unpack our bags. To let go of the things that no longer serve us. We need to look at each item in the bag. Are these socks really ours or do they belong to someone else? What about that ugly top that we hide in the closet, who does that belong to?
We all have baggage, find someone who loves you enough to help you unpack.
– Unknown
I think of the example of going grocery shopping with either a hungry spouse or your children. You are walking down the aisle and getting the items on your list. When you are not looking, they sneak things into the cart. They hide it underneath something already in the cart, so you can’t say no. Then when you get to the check out line, you discover five things in your cart that you didn’t put into it. We are like this in our personal lives. We not only cart around other peoples items in our bags, we pay for them too. That is the best reason to have someone help you unpack. They can help you figure out who those socks and ugly tops actually belong to. They can help you release them back to their true owners.
Travel light, live light, spread the light, be the light.
– Tea Bag Quote
We do this unconsciously for the most part. Part of it comes from the initial wounding experience that you had as a young child, sometime before the age of 8. For some reason so many people I know, including myself, it is age 4. You experienced a childhood trauma, which impacted how you view the world. What also happens is that you take on some of the problems as your own, that came from the other person involved in your wounding.
If you want to fly, you’ve got to give up the things that weighs you down.
– Savannah Smith
For example, in my own case, I walked in on my mom having an affair. As an adult I had a problem with trust. It wasn’t that I didn’t trust others so much as I didn’t trust myself. This caused me to attract untrustworthy people into my life. I finally through years of transformational work discovered that this issue wasn’t about me at all. It was about my mother. When I released this baggage everything in my life shifted, because I finally knew that I could trust myself. I was carrying around a mountain that didn’t even belong to me.
If you wish to travel far and fast, travel light. Take off all your envies, jealousies, unforgiveness, selfishness and fears.
– Glenn Clark
We all do this. When you go camping, they tell you to put your food up in the air between trees so that wild animals can’t get to it. In our backpacks, we have these items that attract the “wild animals”. We attract these experiences into our lives over and over again. We have a pattern of the kind of friends we attract; the kinds of significant others; the kinds of jobs; etc…… Why does the same thing keep happening to us?
Keeping baggage from the past will leave no room for happiness in the future.
– Wayne L Misner
We are attracting it into our life, it is our “wild animal”. What the transformation process does, is it helps us to unpack our backpack. To see what is really inside. What are we carrying that no longer serves us? What are we carrying that belongs to someone else? What grudges, slights, hurts, and painful mountain heavy experiences are we carrying in our backpack?
It’s not the heavy load that breaks you, it’s the way you carry it.
– Lena Horne
We are only meant to carry the load for a short time. The time of the experience happening. Not months and years later. The weight of the past must be released. You are meant to find the gold, and let go of the rest of the boulder. Refocus on where you are headed.
Even the boulder that you are currently carrying, that you are trying to find the gold in. The weight of that boulder can be lessened if you confine it to the lesson itself. Sometimes we take the lesson to mean that we can’t do anything right. That our whole life has been one failure after another. That we are doomed. That our existence itself is a burden. None of those things are ever true. It is our mind pressing down from the weight of every single burden we have ever carried, into one gigantic mountain.
When I accept myself, I am freed from the burden of needing you to accept me.
– Healrhyplace.com
You need to give yourself the gift of forgiveness. The gift of compassion. The gift of redemption. The gift of letting go. Get a piece of paper and start unpacking your backpack. Write down every untold story that you have inside of your heart. For years I blamed myself for my parents divorce. If only I hadn’t opened her bedroom door, I wouldn’t have uncovered her dark secrets, and my parents would still be married. But the truth is that had nothing to do with me, and was the result of their bad decisions and choices over which I had no power. We all have these stories inside of us that must be released. That must be unpacked and let go of.
So stop carrying the mountain. Unpack your backpack. Release the weight of the past.
Always pray to have eyes that see the best, a heart that forgives the worst, a mind that forgets the bad, and a soul that never loses faith.
– Unknown
Give yourself the gift of seeing the best things in your backpack. Of forgiving the worst things that you blame yourself for. Of forgiving the bad things that happened to you, so that you don’t carry the weight of other peoples sins inside of you. And never lose faith that everything in your life can serve you, if you give yourself the gift of love and forgiveness.
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Happy Thanksgiving
I just wanted to take a moment to thank all of you for becoming part of our community. Thank you for taking the time to read our posts. For commenting and liking them and most of all for sharing them with others.
I wanted to let you know that you have all become special to me, because through you I have realized that I am not the only one who thinks about what I write. Thanks to you I have realized that there are many people in this world who see the possibilities that our world can become a better place.
I also wanted to take this day for helping me to be able to receive the love that you have shown to me, in encouraging me to continue to write my heart out on this page. I always dreamed of being a writer, since I was a very small girl. But I didn’t think that I had any talent. I didn’t think that what I wanted to talk about, was anything that anyone would want to read. You have no idea of the joy you have brought into my life.
Thank you! You are a blessing in my life. We are a blessing to each other.
Will You Answer Destiny’s Call?
Sliding Doors is a movie that came out years ago with Gwyneth Paltrow, in which they alternate between two different realities based on her making it through the sliding door of the subway train when she is going home from work. If she catches the train, she also catches her husband with another woman in their bed. If she misses the train, then he is alone when she arrives (thus she doesn’t know he is cheating on her) and stays married to him.
A person often meets his destiny on the road he took to avoid it.
– Jean De La Fontaine
In each parallel universe she becomes a different person. How many split second decisions based on the timing of a moment can you think of? How many alternate timelines could there be, where I was one minute later or earlier? Would my life have drastically changed if a minor incident had not happened because of that one minute?
Never assume that you’re stuck with the way things are. Life changes every single moment, and so can you.
– Ralph Marston
If my nephew had not chosen to walk through the park that night, maybe his random murder would not have happened. Maybe he would still be alive. Since I started LemonadeMakers as a result of his death, maybe I would have never started it. So many possibilities stemming from a couple of maybe’s.
In the search for your destiny, you will often find yourself obliged to change direction.
– Paulo Coelho
When I was last on jury duty, one night driving home, another car making a right hand turn came into my lane and dented up my car. It was a case of he said/she said and since no one stopped to be a witness, we each had to pay our own deductible. Since like all of us, I am a work in progress, I had a hard time working through my personal feelings of “it’s not fair” and why do I now have to go through presenting my case to the state insurance board, etc……, because I am refusing to just roll over and take the $720+ hit to my finances.
Part of reaching your destiny is in understanding your detours.
– RonyEvans.org
When this guy hit me, I immediately went into how if I hadn’t been on jury duty, I would not have been in the intersection making this turn at that time. I would have been through that intersection at least one hour earlier. Either he would have not have had an accident (because no one was in the lane), or he would have hit someone else. For me, jury duty was a sliding door. Not as big an impact as Gwyneth had in the movie, but a sliding door nonetheless.
No matter how many wrong turns you took in life, destiny will take you where you truly belong. Wait with hope and a smile. Destiny will fall in love with you and come to you.
– Riya
What is interesting about the movie is the ending. They take her back to the version in which she didn’t catch her husband in their bed with another woman. However, in this version she is leaving him. She caught him much later in the timeline having an affair. The final scene is with Gwyneth in the elevator. In the elevator with her is the same man she had a relationship with in the other version. Thus tying up the ending to mean that no matter whether she made the subway train or not, she was destined to be with this man.
To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest achievement.
– Ralph Waldo Emerson
So how much of destiny really occurs in our lives? Did my having a very minor accident with this man, which delayed me getting home about an hour change my destiny? Did the minor accident keep me from having a major accident further down the road? Was there a purpose to the accident, a meaning that I will get later in my life? This is one of my back shelf ideas or concepts. Back shelf ideas are things that I learn about and am curious about. I am not yet sure if it constitutes a belief or not. Do your thoughts about things, become the architects of your destiny?
You are the master of your destiny. You can influence, direct and control your own environment. You can make your life what you want it to be.
– Napoleon Hill
What is destiny really? How much does destiny or fate really play into our lives? How much does our desire to tie everything up into neat little bows, make us put fate or destiny as the causation of what happens to us? If destiny is true where does that put free will? Does that eliminate choice, and make it simply an illusion?
I am the master of my fate, and the captain of my destiny.
– Nelson Mandela
Then there is the concept of Karma. Is Karma a destiny that you have consequences for, as actions that play out throughout your life?
Sometimes when things are falling apart they may actually be falling into place.
– Unknown
I don’t have all of the answers. I think that all of them are right in some aspect though. I do believe in a core destiny, that we come to bring something to this world, or experience in this lifetime. I believe that we have free will and choices at every step of the way as we live our life. We can choose to encompass that destiny or run away from it. I do believe in some sort of concept of karma, that our choices all have consequences, both intended and unintended.
Life is not merely a series of meaningless accidents or coincidences. But rather, it’s a tapestry of events that culminate in an exquisite, sublime plan.
– Unknown
I also believe that in each moment of our life, we have a new opportunity to make new choices. We can always turn our ship around if it is off course.
The only person you are destined to become is the person you decide to be.
– Ralph Waldo Emerson
The woman in the photo made the choice to climb up the cliff. Each moment she is making a new choice for a hand or foot hold to take her up to the next level. I think that we are all like this woman, choosing each moment to take ourselves to the next level. I would have chosen the rocky path on solid ground up to the mountain top. I don’t think my heart could take climbing up the side of a cliff.
We know what we are, but know not what we may be.
– William Shakespeare
Each path was a different choice, but the same destination would be reached. Is one wrong or right, or does it matter? What do you think?
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Consciousness Means Being Present To The Unfolding Of Your Life
Dear Beautiful you,
You must not be afraid to start a new chapter . . . , Yes, new beginnings can be scary, endings can be difficult, but your life is meant to be lived and your story is still unfolding . . . , So go ahead and turn the page . . . , Your next chapter is waiting – Heather Stillufsen
Your stories are in a continuous unfolding. In fact, your life is unfolding exactly as it should be.
There is always a new stretch of road ahead of you. It is up to you to continue the journey.
Sometimes you pull off into a rest stop. You need a break, to rest and take care of your body. You need to give yourself time to breathe, to love, to reflect, to be present to what is.
It is important not to get so bound up in what you are seeking, that you forget to give yourself and those around you, a love of life itself.
Loving your life is about trusting your instinct, taking chances, and learning through experiences. It’s a long time journey through the confusion. Live consciously in the moment and enjoy your life as it unfolds – The Coach (RaiseYourMind.com)
You might pull off on an exit that promises you a good meal and the needed fuel for your vehicle. You might take the scenic route to enjoy more of the beauty of the land you are traveling through. I think of the scenic route as being the opportunity to see where life is taking you.
To be able to see all of the awakening opportunities that are around every new corner. Nothing is worse than passing a door of opportunity, only to realize that it really was “a once in a lifetime” experience.
I used to live north of Los Angeles and most of my siblings live up the coast in Monterey/Santa Cruz area. The fastest way to drive up and see them is to take the I-5 up to Pacheco Pass and cross over to the coast there. The drive once over the LA mountains is not very pretty. It is miles of flat land, with some areas that are farmed, but mostly just dry dirt. There is also a town where the cows are waiting to be slaughtered and you can smell it for miles and miles – it makes you want to swear off ever eating meat again.
So, unless I am under real time constraints, I choose to go up the 101, which runs along the coast through wine country. It is a beautiful drive. It takes a little longer, but the drive is so much nicer. If you were driving up the 101 through wine country, you might want to pull off and visit some wineries, watch the waves roll in from the Pacific Ocean, or take in a tourist attraction.
The unfolding of your life is what you make of what happens for you. I firmly believe that life happens for me, not to me. It isn’t solid, cast in concrete.
It is rather like sand, that can be molded into whatever strikes your fancy. It changes. If you don’t like the way it is looking, you can make a minor change or clear off the table and start over.
But at some point, no matter where or why you pulled off the road, you will want to get back onto the road again, because you have a destination you want to reach. No one lives at an “I-5 Rest Stop”, as the destination of their life journey. You don’t stop for fuel and stay at the Shell Station for the rest of your life. And while it might seem like a good idea, you don’t live at the winery, unless you are the owners or workers at the winery.
Life is not a destination; it’s a journey. It’s not a series of goals; it’s a series of steps, of events unfolding as you make your way. Life is not all about accomplishment; it’s all about doing, participating, progressing, growing, learning – Mike Hernacki
You trust in your higher power for guidance. You trust that wherever you are in your journey, it is where you are supposed to be. Every one of life’s lemons that you have received, had a learning contained within. It might be something that becomes evident to you, while you are within the experience. Conversely, It might take years to reveal itself.
A green walnut is really hard to crack – it takes intense force to open it, and if you are successful, the insides are not good to eat. But if you wait until it has matured, (turned brown) you can open it with a simple tap and eat the tasty nut meat that is inside.
Our experiences are sometimes like that walnut, you need to wait until it is ready to be opened in order to receive its gift.
If you find yourself driving down a dirt road of dusty flat land feeling totally disenchanted, you are the only person who can turn in a new direction.
Allow grace to lead you back into being in love with life. Don’t resist. Surrender to what is, not what you are pushing to make it be. Trust in the divine to lead you back to your true destination. Trust the journey. Trust yourself to live your true life, not the shadow of one.
It always, always, always come back to self-love and self-trust.
So trust the process of your life unfolding, and know with certainty, through the peaks and valleys of your journey, that your soul rests safe and secure in the arms of God – Dan Millman
Fly Through Illusions To Reach The Magic of Knowing Yourself
The hardest thing is to really know yourself. You are kind of like one of those hidden drawers in a roll top desk. There are a lot of things to see on the desk, which is how you show up in the world. It hides all of the physical aspects of the desk. Then when you start looking at the desk itself, and open the roll top there is another layer of things to get distracted by. All of the obvious nooks and crannies and drawers.
If you really examine the desk inch by inch you discover that something seems to be a little off. Being curious you start pushing and pulling on the wood of the desk. Inch by inch your fingers keep looking for the hidden lever, until the hidden drawer suddenly pops open. You’ve found the real you. It takes concentration, patience and the ability to be curious instead of judgmental.
“Knowing others is wisdom. Knowing yourself is enlightenment” – Lao Tzu
So what does this really mean? Taking this even a step further, is accepting what you discover about yourself.
“When you know yourself, you are empowered. When you accept yourself, you are invincible” – Tina Lifford
For me, it is how as children you are taught what being successful is. You are taught to get good grades. You are taught to go for higher education for a particular type of job. Medical fields, teaching fields, computer science fields and so on. You are taught to excel in school and then go to work and excel in your chosen profession. In school I was lucky enough to have an amazing teacher who taught me to take concepts apart to truly understand what they meant. To use the How, What, Why kinds of questions to explore what it really means.
“Know who you are. Know what you want. Know what you deserve. And don’t settle for less” – Tony Gaskins
What you should do first is really understand yourself. Know what your passions are in life. What lights you up and makes you happy? Having a healthy self esteem, that really knows what your values and talents are. Most importantly, what your personal genius is. Once you have identified those, you know who you are at your core being. What makes you happy. How you can best serve others.
Then it is up to you to go out and find the profession that meets all of the criteria. Instead you have been so busy being educated, that you missed the importance of self knowledge in the equation. Instead, you have navigated or simply stumbled into a profession that is not a true calling. It’s a paycheck.
How did you choose that profession? Maybe on the advice of a favorite teacher. Maybe you were steered by your parents into what they felt was a financially rewarding career. Maybe it was for the glamour of the profession. In Hollywood many careers are based on dreams of being a Emmy awarded singer, or winning an Oscar. If it is truly your “dream job”, would you do it even if they didn’t pay you?
What did you really know about this profession before you entered it? What illusions did you have about what your profession would give back to you? How did your passion and purpose play into this profession? What about your personal genius? That thing you do that is so easy for you, that you don’t understand why everyone can’t do it? Does it fulfill your divine destiny? Clarity is powerful. Pay attention to day dreams, where your mind wanders is an important clue to what you are really seeking in life.
Commit To Your Dreams!
I invite you to join us on May 2nd for a purposeful gathering. Our intention is to create moments of life-changing conversation on how to make 2020 the year of achievement.
Chances are that what you’re struggling with, others are too. What life questions you have been asking yourself, others are asking themselves too. Get clear on what you want and how to obtain it. If your 2020 dreams and goals are already stalling, get recharged and refocused. Learn how to pivot to success. Join us for a gathering that no one will forget.
“Are we living our dream? Or are we living somebody else’s dream?” – Arianne Huffington
Truly knowing who you are requires a toughness of the soul. Knowing yourself in all of the ways that matter, means that you:
- Know your own mind; what your thoughts are, what thoughts need changing = attitude
- Knowing your own heart; and following where it leads, the souls direction = faith
- Knowing your own strengths; and playing from that space of strength = grace
- Knowing your own limitations; and accepting them for what they are = peace
- Knowing your own values; and never crossing them = nature
- Know your fears; they tell you what is really important = mastery
“You have to love yourself, because no amount of love from others is sufficient to full the yearning that your soul requires from you” – Dobinsky
The world needs you to know yourself, be yourself, love yourself and trust yourself. It is the only way to get from who you are, to who you want to be. It is the only way to figure our what you need to shift, change, release and transform to get to where you want to be. Knowing yourself isn’t easy. It is usually messy, not pretty.
It is about accepting the parts of yourself that even you are hiding from. It is stripping away the stories that you tell, that whitewash your less than stellar qualities. It is about taking down the illusions, removing the cloaks of invisibility and loving what remains. Own the place of your soul. Stand tall and take inventory. Then shift and change and transform into the best version of you. It isn’t easy, but it is priceless.
“Here’s the truth: people who get what they want tend to be the ones to make the effort to know what they want” – Martha Beck
Commit To Your Dreams!
I invite you to join us on May 2nd for a purposeful gathering. Our intention is to create moments of life-changing conversation on how to make 2020 the year of achievement.
Chances are that what you’re struggling with, others are too. What life questions you have been asking yourself, others are asking themselves too. Get clear on what you want and how to obtain it. If your 2020 dreams and goals are already stalling, get recharged and refocused. Learn how to pivot to success. Join us for a gathering that no one will forget.
What Would You Re-Imagine For Your World?
Your personal circumstances don’t determine where you can go, they merely determine where you start.
– Nido Qubein
I think that most of us could agree that when we look out into our world today that it would be great to re-imagine the world in a better place. Many in the world are not happy with our current political situation in the world. In some places in the world, we have wars creating the worst refugee crisis ever. We have terrorist who believe that blowing up the world of others, is a way to re-imagine the world. It can be scary, it can make us angry, and it can make us depressed.
What we need is more people who specialize in the impossible.
– Theodore Roethke
On a personal level, we have personal life changes affecting us. We may have lost our job or career. Or we may have suffered the loss of a relationship or loved one through death or divorce. We may be going through a life threatening medical diagnosis. The stress of raising children, the stress of a taking care of a parent who is slowly exiting this life. So many things that we could want to re-imagine onto a blank piece of paper to make our life easier.
It’s not what you look at that matters, it’s what you see.
– Henry David Thoreau
I believe that we can all be visionaries. Visionaries see possibilities, what could be. They make new roads, armed with nothing but their own vision. Remember the “Back To The Future” movies. When Doc Brown said, “Roads? Where we are going we don’t need roads.” I think that all of us can make changes in our lives that begin with sitting down with this blank piece of paper. We can all start re-imagining our life. But in order to do that, we need to let go of what is no longer serving us. We need to wash off the dust that is on our souls.
If you create a vision for your life, doors will open.
– Unknown
You may hate your job. Sunday night you might not sleep well, because you know that Monday you have to go back to work. Your stomach may be tied up in knots. You may get a Monday morning migraine, every Monday morning. But the thought of looking for a different job is scary. What if you end up in a worse working situation? What if you change jobs only to be laid off from the new job?
Don’t be afraid to fail – be afraid not to try.
– Unknown
That happened to me years ago. I was working for GMAC in their mortgage division in Southern California. There was a smaller mortgage company where the owner was calling me all of the time to come work for him. One day I decided to say yes, because it offered me an opportunity to get a promotion. I went to work for him and as a side project I updated and revamped his existing broker guideline manual. At the same time that I finished this (about six months) the interest rates spiked up, the values of properties went down, and California had a mini meltdown in the mortgage industry. I was laid off. And no one was hiring.
In order to carry a positive action we must develop here a positive vision.
– Dalai Lama
I thought that I had made the worst job decision ever. We ended up having to relocate up to the Seattle area where I had connections in order to find a new job. We didn’t have sufficient savings to weather all of this and I hurt our credit. We relocated our children who were all in school in the middle of the year. So many little crisis’s created because of one decision. But I started with the blank piece of paper.
You’ve got to think about big things while you’re doing small things, so that all the small things go in the right direction.
– Alvin Toffler
I re-imagined my world and created something even better. I found a new job, with a higher promotion and a higher income. We fixed our credit, we bought a new home. Our children adapted, they made new friends and ran around with all of the cousins that lived in the area. What I learned in creating that manual for that old employer is what got me the wonderful new job. It was a tool that I needed for my toolbox to continue my career growth, and I don’t think that I would have been hired for that position without it.
Your purpose explains what you are doing with your life. Your vision explains how you are living your purpose. Your goals enable you to realize your vision.
– Bob Proctor
So what does that experience tell me about what is happening in our world today? It gives me hope. Because I think that many of the long standing structures and governments in our world today – the systems that we have had in place for so long, need a transformation. They are no longer working and need to be released. We need a transformation into something better. But just like what happens to us personally, the world hasn’t been listening and making the changes in an easy way. So instead we appear to be having the breakdown to breakthrough. What we need is more of us to step into being visionaries. To re-imagine what each of these systems could be. To look at all of the structures and say, “what else is possible?”
Your vision will become clear only when you look into your heart. Who looks outside, dreams. Who looks inside awakens.
– Carl Jung
The signpost on this photo has 4 blank boards. If you sat down right now with a blank piece of paper and wrote on it four things in your life that you are not happy with, what would they be? What would you release and how would you release it?
All tears are a releasing of resistance. Every time. No exceptions.
– Abraham
Are you in resistance with releasing what no longer serves you? Most of us are, even when it is painful to hold on. It is what we know. Letting go without knowing what comes next, is more fearful than holding on to the thing that creates pain in our life. While I believe wholeheartedly that the journey matters more than the destination, we need a destination or all we do is wander.
The only thing worse than being blind is having eyesight but no vision.
– Helen Keller
So create four new destinations for your life. Write down what you would change if I gave you a magic wand that you could wave and make your life different. Some things may be personal for your own life. Things you want to attract, a significant other, a new dream job, a child of your own. Some things may be more universal, like ending wars or terrorism, or medical care for all, or ending poverty or global hunger.
Create the highest, grandest vision possible for your life. Because you become what you believe.
– Oprah
Your soul is calling to you. Your dreams are calling to you. Your destiny is trying to unfold. Take out that blank piece of paper and put something on those four blank signposts. Start your journey to a new destination. I can attest to the fact that your life will never be the same. I took up the pen and started writing these blogs as part of my journey to a new destination. You can’t imagine how much my life has changed. The journey hasn’t been smooth, but it has been wonderful just the same.
Sight is what you eyes produce. Vision is what your heart produces. Never let what you see effect your vision.
– Shandren Reddy
Visionaries don’t just believe in impossible things, they believe those impossible things must be done. To take yourself from where you are, to someplace you have never been.
You need to associate with people that inspire you, people that challenge you to rise higher, people that make you better. Don’t waste your valuable time with people that are not adding to your growth. Your destiny is too important.
– Joel Osteen
That is the importance of community. It is why I write these blogs and share the news stories that I share. You all challenge me to be a better person. Thank you for showing up and sharing your stories and your encouragement. So let’s all go raise hell, and change the world!
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There Is A Dance That Only You Know How To Do
In many shamanic societies, if you came to a shaman or medicine person complaining of being depressed or dispirited, they would ask the following four questions:
When did you stop dancing?
When did you stop singing?
When did you stop being enchanted by stories?
When did you stop finding comfort in the sweet territory of silence?
When I read George Carlin’s quote I thought of the above words – because the wolves being silent at the moon, and the moon howling back – this spoke to me of a wolf being dispirited and the moon howling back those questions.
This quote by George Carlin with the wolves being silent also reminded me of a time of reflection. Being silent and going within to review the actions of the year. A time to release the baggage of the past.
And you were just like the moon, so lonely, so full of imperfections, but just like the moon, you shined in times of darkness – Unknown
Every January we think of the new year’s goals or resolutions, new dreams to grow into our lives. The things we want to accomplish or bring into our lives. In order to be ready for that contemplation, you need to create a clean slate.
A good way to do that is to examine what you set out to do last year, what happened along the way, and what you need to acknowledge and release.
Part of what can be released is all of those dreams that didn’t happen. You can mourn and release those dreams that no longer are a part of your life, because you have outgrown them.
We all have shadows within us. Dark places where you hide the things you don’t want to face. Where you hide things you are ashamed of. These things need to be brought into the light. You need to release them, so that they can become what they were meant to be. They are the broken bits of you, the dreams you abandoned because of someone or something that hurt you.
You can also release any toxic relationships that have ended or need to now end. Release the darkness.
And like the moon, she had a side of her so dark, that even the stars couldn’t shine on it; she had a side of her so cold, that even the sun couldn’t burn on it – Abigail J
I have always thought the saying is so true, “We make plans, God laughs”. This is because you tend to make plans that you feel safe about, things you know that you can do. Those kinds of plans don’t grow you or accomplish all that you are capable of doing. So, God laughs because he will take those plans, tear them apart and rebuild them into better ones. Those are the unanswered prayers, the dreams that won’t grow you towards your destiny.
Throughout the year you can look for those examples, where your small safe plan, was revised with divine humor into a much bigger plan.
Or it might be that because you didn’t do a release from last year, that this year’s plans have not even got off the ground.
Look not for the desires you have, for they are simply things that you want in your life. Look for what your soul longs for. What each heartbeat is sending to you, telling you that THIS IS WHY YOU ARE HERE!
When the wolf howls at the moon, you can hear the yearning in his voice. Give your own yearning a voice in your life.
Don’t tell me the sky’s the limit when there are footprints on the moon – Paul Brandt
So with the next full moon, you can again review, release, and restore life. Every quarter, the moon will usher in a new season. That is a perfect time to release the old, failed, or aborted dreams, and plan anew.
We dance for laughter,
we dance for tears,
we dance for madness,
we dance for fears,
we dance for hopes,
we dance for dreams,
we are the dancers, we create dreams.
Albert Einstein
One of my all-time favorite songs is “Moondance” by Van Morrison. I love the summer and autumn nights of a full moon. With a warm breeze blowing and sitting on a sandy beach, watching the moon rise over the water – there isn’t a better feeling. You can feel the magic of the night strumming your heart strings.
