Transformation Is the Dance Of Life

What Would Your Life Look Like, If I Gave You The Key To Unlock Your Full Potential?

Have you ever said, “I would be happier if .., fill in the blank ____________ (my spouse was …,, my job was…, my weight was ? lbs. less?  etc…)”  I am going to use my weight as the example, but you can substitute anything in your life, that is currently not bringing you into a state of joy.  As you read through this, you can just adapt the process around your job, your spouse, your family, your finances, etc…

Never put the key to your happiness in someone else’s pocket  – Unknown

This includes the pocket of your self saboteur.  Have you ever counted calories?  Have you counted steps?  Weighed yourself every day to see if you released a single pound?   I know I have.  I have a Fitbit and I watch the numbers go up until I reach that 10,000 step mark.  I worry over what I am eating and snacking on.  What I recently discovered about this, is I am in fact disempowering myself.

Old ways won’t open new doors.  – unknown

A new way of saying Einstein’s definition of insanity.  I am “trying” over and over again to have better control, so that I can become healthier.  Old ways that didn’t work the first time.  It is sort of like banging my head against the door, hoping this time it will open for me.  I keep “trying” to get myself out of the obesity designation.  What I am in fact doing, is disempowering myself from being successful.  I am empowering my view of my weight, to have complete control of my eating and exercise habits, setting myself up for self sabotage.  I have put the keys to my happiness in the pocket of my self saboteur.

Find a heart that will love you at your worst and arms that will hold you at your weakest.  – Unknown

That heart and those arms need to be yours, not someone else’s.  When something isn’t working, then study, research, read and listen.  It never has failed me that someone will say something that triggers my mind to go down a rabbit hole and come up with something that my heart and soul have been trying to communicate with me.

Dear Destiny,  I am ready to listen now.  – unknown

When I walk every day, I listen to podcasts.  I have Tony Robbins, TED Talks, a NPR show called Scratch, EWomen’s Network, Success Magazine, and several others that I listen to.  I listen to whatever is next on the list.  This past week, I pieced something together from several different podcasts that became an “aha” moment. I needed to listen to my inner genius.  Those who listen to their inner genius often end up changing their world.  So I asked myself, “What is it still possible for me to do?”  Notice that I said do, not try.

I have been trying to discover through hits and misses what is contributing to the weight I have, and what I might do to be more successful in releasing the weight.  It isn’t as simple as diet and exercise.  What I received this week was a couple of keys.

Key #1 – Don’t try.  Trying doesn’t last long.  Trying is one of those words that sounds positive, but doesn’t have a high energy vibration to it.  Falling back to the famous Yoda quote – “Don’t try, Do or don’t do.”  Instead the key that fits into the transformation door, is to commit myself to “mastery” of releasing weight and becoming healthy.  Mastery is hard work.  You have to learn something completely.  To take it apart and put it back together again.  To understand the purpose and reason for every single part, and the actions it plays.  It takes time.  But when you become a master at something, it doesn’t just change you, it transforms you.

Mastery reflects understanding diet and nutrition, not generally, but as it applies to my individual DNA and my physical body.  It reflects understanding how the feelings I am feeling each day (my moods, and memories) enter into the equation.  It is about paying attention to my instincts or gut reactions to the pain and pleasure that is happening to me moment by moment.  And lastly it included my thinking or my intellect.

There are powers inside of you which, if you could discover and use, would make of you everything you ever dreamed or imagined you could become.    – Orison Swett Marsden

Key #2 – Realize that my mind plays this game of chaos.  I can tell that my weight is affecting my general health.  I am exhausted.  I have digestive issues among other things happening.

But my mind likes the chaos it understands, better than the chaos it doesn’t know.  It started from fear.  It said it was trying to protect me from unwanted attention.  It told me that I didn’t want to be like my mom, and hurt people that I loved.

So add in a few pounds, plus a few more.  Still getting attention, don’t worry, just add a few more pounds.  My own subconscious good intentions will kill me.  I needed to forgive myself, and let go of the need for protection.

Forgiveness is not something we do for other people.  It’s something we do for ourselves to move on.   – unknown

Key #3 – I am changing the interior landscape a little each day.  I really never practiced self care.  It was always care for everyone else first, and I got whatever was left over. 

So it is like going from the hard dry desert to a beautiful flower garden with a stream flowing through the middle.  I had to dig up the soil.  I had to put in some fertilizer to bring it up to optimal healthy soil that would support the growth of the flower garden. 

I then planted seeds.  I watered them.  I weeded out what doesn’t belong or bring me joy.  I brought in some nice chairs to sit in.  A small table to put a nice glass of lavender lemonade on.  I transformed the desert of “not taking care of myself”, into a place that empowers me to do self care.

Your success and happiness lies in you.  Resolve to keep happy, and your joy and you shall form an invincible host against difficulties.    – Helen Keller

 Key #4 – Gratitude.  Every day I am finding things about my body, my health, the way I am taking better care of me – ways I can be grateful that I have this opportunity to bring back vibrant health to me.  Gratitude pays homage and honors the steps I am taking.

It says that while I am not where I want to be, I am making progress.

It says that I don’t have to beat myself up on the days I fall short of 10,000 steps, or have the strawberry shortcake for dessert.  It says that I will continue to be committed to bringing my body into a completely healthy state.  The “friend” needs to be “you”.  Self Love.

I’m a success today because I had a friend who believed in me, and I didn’t have the heart to let him down.   – Abraham Lincoln

If you find yourself spending a lot of time and money, and not making any progress, you are in fact, stuck in neutral.  It feels like you are in drive, because you are counting calories, you are weighing in, you are restricting your food intake, but you are in fact stuck in neutral. This is evident when day after day, no weight is released. Your subconscious mind has you stuck in the chaos you know.  You are blindfolded as to what is really happening.

Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark in the hopeless swamps of the not-quite, the not-yet, and the not-at-all.  Do not let the hero in your soul perish in lonely frustration for the life you deserved and have never been able to reach.  The world you desire can be won.  It exists  . . . it is real . . .  it is possible . . . it’s yours.    – Any Rand

When you are not reaching your goals, you need to stop.  Take a deep breath and look at what you are doing. First look to gratitude to where you are on the map.  Then look to the patterns of the familiar chaos – what is eating up your time, energy, money, contributing to your frustrations?  What story are you buying into that creates the “I am too tired” to walk tonight?”  What food cravings around caffeine, sugar, processed foods, fast foods are you having because you are bored or stressed out?  These stories are your self sabotaging patterns.  If you can start to recognize them, then you have the potential to transform them.

The will to win, the desire to succeed, the urge to reach your full potential…, these are the keys that will unlock the door to personal excellence.    – Confucius

When you have mapped out where you are, then you are ready to put the car back into drive and put your foot on the gas.  You do this by getting deeper into personal mastery.  The neutral gear is calling your attention to some part of the chaos, that is not working for you any longer.  Something that needs to be down shifted, released and/or transformed.  Once you have gotten this new piece of knowledge into your head, drawn it down into your heart to become wisdom, then you can release your passion to fuel your motivation.  You can realize your expanded potential and unlock a new door in your life of transformation.

You have always possessed the keys of transformation.  The divine puts the doors of opportunity in front of you, over and over again.  It is up to you to put the key in the lock, and go through the door. When you do that you discover untold potential and mastery within yourself.  You have more natural potential than you could use in 100 lifetimes.  Don’t let this life go by, not even using a small fraction of it.

Questions provide the key to unlocking your unlimited potential.   – Tony Robbin

Leave Fear Behind You, Face Everything And Rejoice

Women who run with wolves have discovered something about themselves, that allows them to leave behind the fear that is expressed because of going outside the comfort zone.  See beauty in being able to walk alone or with the pack.  Because you are unafraid, you may be called names by those who will fear you.  Labels like defiant, incorrigible, impossible, wild and untamed by society.  Wear these labels with pride.

When you live with fear, you will always be “Finding-Excuses-And-Reasons” (F.E.A.R.)why you are not living the life you are yearning for. Why do you experience this type of fear? It comes from a lack of self love, self trust, and self care.

You don’t think that you have the courage; that you don’t deserve it; that you can’t have your cake and eat it too.  You have bought into being small.  Bought into not taking up a lot of space.  Bought into being unworthy.  It is not your true nature.  It is not who you are deep in your heart.  It is not who you are yearning to be.  Do not become an endangered species.  Do not muffle your soul for the sake of others.

For women who run with wolves, you have discovered S.E.L.F. which stands for Sacred-Empowered-Liberated-Self Care

She sees herself as a Sacred being

She sees herself as an Empowered being

She sees herself as a Liberated being

She sees herself as a Fearless being.

•  She runs with a vast community of souls, who hold and support her.
• She knows as a sacred being she is never, ever, truly alone. 
• She is honored as a wisdom keeper, an empowered being that has grounded herself into the earth. Her roots run deep into the earth and support the work she does in the world.
• She knows that she is a liberated woman who came to this earth to free those who have become shackled to the stories of not being good enough, pretty enough, or worthwhile.
• She is fearless because for her the word fear is a word of high integrity, because for her it means Face-Everything-And-Rejoice (a transformed definition of fear).

Her purpose is to remind others of their own sacred agreements they came here to fulfill. Of the love they have for each other. To free them from their self made chains and fulfill their own purpose in being here.

She knows that she can be grateful for each fear that is faced down and transformed into something wonderful. She is rejoicing because she is working with others out in the world to build a bridge to shift our world from the challenges we see happening today, into a place of unity, love and trust.

If you can change your definition of the word fear, you can change your world.

To fearless women, I am honored to be your sister.

Below is a copy of my poem which expresses these thoughts.

The wolf howls at the moon, not out of loneliness,
As he knows he is one with the universe.
He howls out of gratitude to be a member of the pack.

He remembers those he has traveled with in past lives, 
He sees those he is traveling with again.
He rejoices in his vast community of souls, knowing that he is truly never alone.

The great spirit has honored the wolf with a voice that sings out in the darkness.
He honors the great spirit by singing to us,
“Do not be afraid, for you are not alone”
“I am here, and I remember you even if you have forgotten”.

Like the wolf I sing out to you, through my words on a page I say,
“I remember you, for we have traveled together before.”
I honor you that you have come again to do the great work before us.

Call out together with me as we gather our relatives that have forgotten their purpose.
Call to their minds our sacred agreement to meet at this time and place.
Whisper to them of the great love we have for each other and their hearts will remember.

Gather around as we build the bridge of knowledge and understanding.
This bridge will unite all peoples together in love
This bridge is shifting our world into a new age of unity, love and trust.

We are one,
One love, I love us
One trust, I trust us,
I honor our sacred agreements, I am here.

Face the fears that are keeping you locked out of your destiny. Unlock your cages and use those divine gifts with purpose to not only shift and change your world, but the entire world. Come and renew yourself. Find your voice and howl at the moon!

We Are Victorious Over Fear

We crash.  We burn, and we get back up stronger, more resilient, and more determined than ever before.  We are not victims, we are victorious.  

– Garrett Paknis

With each step we add something to our life or, we release something out of our life.  That is how change and transformation works.  It is taking that step.  That step towards our dreams.  We don’t look behind us and waste our energy in feeding our fears.  We just keep taking another step.  Each thing that we release out of our life is something that no longer brings us joy.  It no longer serves us.  It might be that it is something that we have outgrown.  Or it may be made up of disappointments.  Something that feels like a failure or setback.  We take out the lesson we needed and we release the rest.  It is all the parts of the illusion that we are burning away.  Those so called losses do not define who you are in reality.   Only in fears illusion do they hold any power. 

There is no illusion greater than fear. 

– Lao Tzu

When we don’t release the illusions we can become frustrated with our life.  Frustration is like damming up the river.  It tries to keep flowing, but it gets stopped by the dam.   At some point the water rises up to the top of the dam.  Then it starts to trickle over.  It isn’t yet free flowing.  We start to realize that the dam is the problem.  It is at this point of recognition, that we can at last redirect the energy of the river, to burn away the illusion of the dam, and begin to flow freely again to the sea. When your passion and your purpose are greater than your fears and excuses, you will find a way.

Life doesn’t get easier or more forgiving; we get stronger and more resilient.

 – Dr Steve Maraboli

When we can at last see through the illusion of fear, we begin to get bold enough to use our voice to speak our truth.  We can be brave enough to listen to the voice of our heart, to our intuition, our souls voice.  And we can be strong enough to finally live our life’s purpose with full out passion.  We are willing to be vulnerable enough, to be split open and let all our insides spill out onto the table.  We are strong enough to be who we really are.  To fully expose the parts of us that we had hidden away from fear of being seen.  The phrase “do not be afraid” is written in the bible 365 times.  A daily reminder to be fearless.  So start everyday with this reminder to be fearless, breathing in the faith of walking with courage and fulfilling your divine purpose..

Fear is always triggered by creativity, because creativity asks you to enter into realms of uncertain outcome, and fear hates uncertain outcome.  This is nothing to be ashamed of, it is, however, something to be dealt with.

 – Elizabeth Gilbert

It is not letting our dreams be deferred to “Someday Isle”.  Someday I will have the time; someday I will have the money; someday when the kids are grown and through college.  Instead we trace our stories to their roots.  We liberate our soul to fulfill our dreams.  It isn’t about “what happened to me” (see my pain and feel sorry for me), it is what we choose to do with life’s experiences.  It is about look at who I have become, what I “chose” to become.  What treasure we found within the experience, the hidden gem.  It is about how it has exposed the better me that was hiding inside of it.

The strongest oak of the forest is not the one that is protected from the storm and hidden from the sun.  It’s the one that stands in the open where it is compelled to struggle for its existence against the winds and the rains and scorching sun.

 – Napoleon Hill

It is pausing as you inhale the breath. To pause listening to the question in the space of the pause.  To hearing the answer with the exhalation of the breath.  There in that space, is the creative spirit.  It is waiting to take you by the hand.  To walk the road of fulfillment of the dream.  There in that space is the taste of possibilities.  It is how that creativity bubbles to the top when we take the time to just breathe and listen.

We get a glimpse in that space of where we are heading.  It invites us to plunge into the river and flow to the sea.  To learn to dance down life’s road.  Be curious, make great discoveries.  Observe how the unknown can become joyful. 

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Don’t Ever Let Anyone Dull Your Sparkle

 She who leaves a trail of glitter is never forgotten. Do you believe this about yourself and your life? Or do you think it only about someone else.  Someone who is more beautiful, more intelligent, richer than you? Too many of us don’t even feel worthy to have the glitter, yet alone leave a trail of it for others to follow.

I just wish I hadn’t spent so much time worrying about not being someone else’s definition of enough.  – Sophia Bush

So many of us come out of childhood thinking that we are not enough. Not enough to have our parents love us the way they should have. Not smart enough. Not talented enough (insert – don’t sing, don’t dance, don’t draw). Not pretty enough. The list is endless about how we are not enough, to be loved, accepted, to have our dreams become a reality.

Always know you are more than enough.  You are precious, unique, and worth being adored, cherished and treasured! – Kandee Johnson

Try to say nothing negative about yourself for one hour, for one day, for one week, for one month.  The longer you can maintain this test, the more amazing your life will become.   It has been said that the biggest disease affecting humanity is “I am not enough”.

It is the driver of every act of self sabotage. When your mind thinks “I am not enough”, you will subconsciously self sabotage yourself out of anything that doesn’t affirm that lie.

Marissa Peer is a bestseller author, celebrity hypnotist and speaker. A lot of her focus is on helping people overcome this limiting belief to help them stop sabotaging their lives.

One of the things that she recommends is putting on your phone a timed text message stating “I am enough” and having it text you each morning and evening.

Write on the mirrors in your home, especially in your bathroom and carry around a piece of paper to remind you

“YOU ARE ENOUGH

– you are so enough

it is UNBELIEVABLE how enough you are.”

So think about your language and how often do you say things like –

• I am so stupid
• I always forget important things
• I am ___________ – whatever derogatory label you say about yourself (fat, lazy, ugly, etc…)

What is that something about yourself?  That quality you think is missing?  That place where you don’t think you are enough?

• Aim for balance.
• Make up your own rules.
• Create reasons on how instead you love that particular aspect of yourself.
• Follow your own path.  The rules of beauty and intelligence are all made up anyway.
• Start your own fashion and don’t let anyone tell you “who” you are.
• Love and appreciate yourself first, and then spread that glitter upon everyone you meet.

When you get praise, how often do you reject praise, and you add in a piece of criticism? “That is a beautiful outfit you have on today”, and you say – “this old thing, it makes me look fat”. Even scarier, do your sons and daughters say these things about themselves? When they are 1, 2 or 3 years old we celebrated that they took their first step, their first word, the first time they went potty in the potty chair. But there comes a time when they start school and they start being compared to others. Now they are experiencing the “not enough” and they start believing it.

The fear of not getting the reward becomes the fear of rejection.  The fear of not being good enough. . . is what makes us try to change, what makes us create an image.  – Miguel Angel Ruiz

The book, “The Four Agreements” by Miguel Angel Ruiz is a wonderful book that teaches you about the masks that you began wearing when you were children.  You will wear these masks all of your life, if you don’t learn how to remove them.  You need to be who you truly are, without the fear of rejection and not being enough.  Turn it around for yourself, for your children. Learn to accept praise without feeling unworthy. Hear the words you say about yourself, and change them when they are downgrading or demeaning. I always wanted my mother to say I did a good job – I made it a point to say to my children that they did a good job.

Lie to your brain, cheat your fear, and steal back your life of “I am more than enough” feeling that you had as a very young child.

• I am enough;
• You are enough;
• We’ve always been enough.
• Now grab the glitter and start leaving a trail, spreading it with every step you take.

Choices, Chances, Changes

Win as if you were used to it, lose as if you enjoyed it for a change.

  – Ralph Waldo Emerson

At some point in our childhood we start looking at trying and failing, as being a loser,  because we did not do it perfectly the first time we tried.   A baby learns how to roll over; then crawl; then walk.  A baby learns how to say words.  Think of any 1 – 2 year old and they do not pronounce each word perfectly.  I remember my boys saying truck, but the “T” blended with the “R” sounded like an “F” and peoples heads would turn when they said the word, like they were swearing.  My boys didn’t decide that because they couldn’t say the word perfectly the first time, that they would never attempt to say the word again.  A baby who stands up for the first time and then plops back down on their bum doesn’t decide that crawling is safer, so that is all they are going to do forever.

If you believe the doubts in your mind you won’t achieve the dreams in your heart.

  – Marinela Reka

A girlfriend and I were discussing this, and I thought that it must have something to do with peer pressure.  When we enter daycare or some other classroom experience and discover that some kids can do things better than we can.  At some point the comparison starts shutting us down.  We don’t want to risk the possibility of being wrong, so we don’t raise our hands when the teacher asks the class a question.  We put a label on not being perfect, as being a total failure.  In our minds we see kids with mean faces, laughing at us.  Or maybe we see our parents or teachers telling us that we are just stupid or dumb.  That we can’t learn anything.  That we will never be anything.

Failure is not the opposite of success; it’s a stepping stone to success.

  – Elli Stassinopoulos

What if we were to consciously try to change that meaning in our own head.  What if failure is part of success and something to be enjoyed?  Just as much as we celebrate crossing the finish line in a race as the winner, we were to celebrate crossing the finish line even 1 second faster than we had before, even if it was 100th place in the race? 

Winston Churchill had that kind of thinking.  I think that if he had been of a different mentality, WWII for England might have turned out differently.  One of my favorite quotes of his –

Success is going from failure to failure without a loss of enthusiasm.

  –  Winston Churchill 

The reality of the situation is that each time we try something new, it is going to be full of things that we can do differently to be more successful the next time.  They say that it takes 10,000 hours to become a master of something.  So each time we do it, we are a little more successful.  We can look at what happened and determine what we can shift, take out, put it, tweak the next time to make it even better.

What makes someone talented successful?  Michael Jordon summed it up with,

I’ve never been afraid to fail.

    – Michael Jordon

We have to be willing to take the leap of faith off the cliff.  We may not land perfectly, but when we replay it in our mind, we can determine what we did, and what we can change.  Then we can go back up to the top and try it again. 

If you’re not prepared to be wrong, you’ll never come up with anything original.

  – Ken Robinson

Everything can be improved.  10,000 tries allows for an awful lot of improvements, step by step.  Step by step, we place each thing that didn’t work as the stones that we step on as we try it one more time.  Failures are part of the process of living a life that is worth living.  It is how we grow, by changing something and trying something new.  True success can only come from doing something new, failing at it and doing it again, just differently.

Never let success get to your head, and never let failure get to your heart.

  – unknown

Like the irritation to the oyster, which gets coated over and over again, each new thing we learn becomes a pearl of priceless beauty.  Can you look back at your life and say thank you, for the mistakes you made that taught you to laugh at yourself?  Those stories that felt painful at the time.  Now they are the funniest stories that you and your friends tell each other.  It always starts with, “Remember when I . . . ” and then ends with laughter.   

Don’t worry about failures, worry about the chances you miss when you don’t even try.

  –  Jack Canfield

How many opportunities in our life have we walked past, because we were afraid to try? There is nothing worse than a life that you didn’t even try to live.  That is where the true regrets in your life come from.  The things you did not do.

Love this quote (which didn’t have who wrote it, so unknown)

I AM STRONG

because I know my Weaknesses

I AM BEAUTIFUL

because I am aware of my Flaws

I AM FEARLESS

because  I learnt to recognize, illusion from Real

I AM WISE

because I learn from my Mistakes

I AM A LOVER

because I have felt Hate

and . . . ,

I CAN LAUGH

because I have known Sadness

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Wake Up and Live!

Action without vision is only passing time.  Vision without action is merely daydreaming.  But vision with action can change the world –  Nelson Mandela

You can drive down the freeway, not paying attention to where you are going.  You will go places, but in reality, you are just passing time.  Vision without action is daydreaming.  You can write down how you want to go to Scotland.  But if you don’t save any money, it is just a daydream.  But when you put the vision and action together, miracles can happen.

You can put a budget in place and save money. You can check out websites and find a really good deal on airplane tickets, or a travel package.  You can put in your request for vacation time at work.  You can research and plan and pay for the perfect trip to Scotland, and it happens because you put the dream into action.

Don’t tell people your dreams.  Show them – Unknown

I love science fiction books.  The writers dream up things that don’t yet exist or that people of their day didn’t yet know about.  In Gulliver’s Travels, Jonathon Swift wrote that Mars had two moons – it would be nearly a century later that they discovered he was right.  Jules Verne had rockets launching into space from Florida.  Kipling had mail being flown all over the world, before there were even airplanes.  Such things as television, solar power, video phones, movies with sound, space flight – all things talked about in science fiction before they were invented.

All of this came from someone’s dream, or vision being brought into reality.  I know that someday in the future, we will beam people from place to place.  Science will catch up to those dreams too.

But what about your everyday life?  Can your dreams create the future for you personally?  I have always loved this Steve Jobs quote:

It is really up to you to get still enough that you can hear the voice of your soul, your intuition.  Not listening to who the rest of the world wants you to be.  But getting still enough that you can hear the whispers that you have ignored for years.

The distance between dreams and reality is called action – Unknown

To listen to that still, soft voice.  You can’t be the anchor for everyone else in your life.  If you succeed in drowning out the voice of your soul, you drown your happiness.  Life is a gift.  Your soul knows the key to happiness.  It wants you to be crazy and live out those dreams that you buried deep within.  It wants you to wake up and be awesome.  The ruts in the road only show up, when you are not living your dreams.  The negative emotions drain your energy, and your life.  Wake up and dig up those dreams.  Don’t let them die in the dirt.  Put your vision into reality.

Your soul will open doors, but you have to be looking for them and walk through them.  Your soul will give you signs, but you have to read them and then do what they say, by following through with action.  If you are listening to the radio and not paying attention, then you will pass the signs by.  Just like on the freeway, there will be more than one sign telling you to stop for gas.  You can’t blame the universe when you don’t pay attention to the voice of your soul and run out of gas.

 Every morning you have two choices; continue to sleep with your dreams, or wake up and chase them – Unknown 

Get curious.  Dream Big.  Be Unstoppable.  There are those who try to make the doors to your dreams slam shut, they try to put things in the way so that they can’t be opened.  You have to see what is, and what else is possible.  That is where the magic happens, that is what makes the miracle possible.  That is the place where the newer, bigger dreams live.  That is the place of giants, where the dreams are deeper than the bottom of the ocean and larger than the boundaries of the universe.   So, Wake Up and Live!

Strong Women Value Themselves and Each Other

The devil whispered in my ear, “you’re not strong enough to withstand the storm.”  Today I whispered in the devil’s ear, “I am the storm”.

  – Unknown

We are all stronger than we know or think we are.  I come from a long line of strong pioneer women.  My great, great grandmother came across the Oregon Trail as a young girl.  The wagon train that her adopted family was part of was attacked by Indians.  She was adopted by the tribe and given to an Indian brave that she had two girls with.  One day a French Canadian trapper saw her and offered to take her back to the white people.  My great grandmother was hidden in an oak barrel for two days scared that if she made a sound she would be killed.  When she reached Oregon and the white people my great grandmother suffered the prejudice of being a half breed.  Her mothers tale was one of rescue, her tale was something else.

In my own life, my parents were divorced when I was four because my mother had an affair and became pregnant with another married mans child.  She moved us around a lot and it wasn’t until I was in high school that I went to the same school the entire grade.  She was married five times and had numerous other relationships looking for something outside of herself, to fill the hole within.  At one point when I was thirteen years old we were homeless because we had no where to go when her current relationship failed.  That was when I knew that my life would be different.  She taught me that you couldn’t find anything outside of yourself to fill the need you had inside.  It had to come from within.  Even though she made a lot of bad decisions, she was the strongest woman I have ever known.  I come from a long line of strong women.  This is what they taught me:

Above all, be the heroine of your life, not the victim.

  – Nora Ephron

Strong women know that sometimes we just need to sit with the questions until a direction is clearly revealed.

Strong women can sit with another woman in the silence without needing to say anything to break the tension.

Strong women know that when another woman is venting she doesn’t want anything to be fixed, she just needs someone there to witness the removal of the splinter that is causing her pain.

Strong women know that they must make their own light. And if as it sometimes happens that their light goes out, another sister will be there to share hers, until we are strong enough to relight our own.

Strong women know that when the light goes out, we are facing the day, when we question everything. When something so tragic happens that all of our foundations crash into dust.

This is the day when we all circle around our sister as she faces her crisis of faith and reveals the doubts which will birth a new creation. This is the day when we nurture her. When each sister holds the soul of the other ,and whispers the words of transformation.

This is the day of transformation which strips away the old way of being. Rising like a phoenix from the fire, we are reborn, fully transformed. 

No longer trying to be what others want us to be, we accept “us” without reservations or restrictions.

Strong women know that when you stand strong for yourself, you are standing strong for all of us.  When this belief is fully understood and lived, incredible things happen.

We value who we are, no matter what anyone else thinks. 
We forgive ourselves completely. 
We trust ourselves wholeheartedly. 
We are brave enough to love ourselves just as we are, perfectly imperfect. 
We empower ourselves to fully embrace our intuition.
We begin to live our life being the wonderful creation we are.

We fully realize the power of being a goddess, and that nothing can hurt us or stop us, except us.

A strong women doesn’t hold back either the laughter or the tears, because both cleanse the soul.

A strong women doesn’t apologize for knowing how to be both soft and powerful.

A strong women in her essence, her entelechy, is a gift to herself, to her tribe, and to the world.

I choose to be kind because it makes me happy.  But I will defend my boundaries and my loved ones without hesitation.  Make no mistake:  I am fierce.

  – Nanea Hoffman

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An Inch Of Movement Brings You Closer To Your Goals Than A Mile Of Intention

Things do not change.  We Change

 – Henry David Thoreau

Transformation signifies that I can’t go back to what was.  I can only move forward.  I really like the thinking process that Jason went through, to get to this realization of treating transformation as a game. 

Transformation is my favorite game and in my experience, anger and frustration are the result of your not being authentic somewhere in your life or with someone in your life.  Being fake about anything creates a block inside of you. Life can’t show up for you if you don’t show up as you.

 – Jason Mraz

When my daughter was around 4 years old, she had to have a root canal done.  I was really worried that the experience would make her afraid of the dentist.  She had already had a bad experience with a pediatrician, and would cry when she had to go to the doctor.  I was referred to a specialist and wow!  What an excellent dentist.  He was talking to her and telling her some long complicated story.  I watched as he gave her the Novocain shot – he had her so involved in his story that she didn’t see or feel the needle in her mouth.  He went very slowly, and she didn’t ever notice that she got the shot.  At the end of the visit, she was happy and relaxed.  I was really impressed.  He treated the whole thing as a game.  She didn’t have a traumatic experience.  It really is all about the attitude that we have about it. 

The next part of his quote, is how when we are angry and frustrated in our life, it circles back to us – not something happening outside of us.  It might be that we had expectations that were not realistic, and so we are mad that it didn’t happen the way we expected.  Or it might be that we had the expectation of failure, and so set ourselves up to fail.  We created the block ,and then we banged our head against it in anger and frustration.

In my own life experience I have a large list of “reasons” why I can’t, or why it didn’t work out.  But under those “reasons” is the block that I put there to run into.  We need to learn how to be honest with ourselves.  Not cruel or mean, judging our efforts and calling ourselves a loser.  But rather, we need to dig up the block to see what it was sitting on.  This hidden knowledge, is the real reason why we are not transforming as we wish.  Some of things you might find are the “I’m not enough” excuses.  “I’m afraid” excuses.  “I will just fail” excuses.  I am sure that you could add a few of your own to this list.

I know this transformation is painful, but you’re not falling apart; you’re just falling into something different, with a new capacity to be beautiful.

  – William C. Hannan

For growth to happen, transformation is necessary.  It brings an opportunity into our lives.  We have to show up, for it to happen.  We have a choice to take up the challenge it creates, and work with and through it.  We can choose to fight it, to try to prevent it from happening.  When we resist transformation, it usually creates a crisis in our lives.

Every crisis contains within it the seeds for transformation and growth. 

  – Jodie Gale

It is so much easier to initiate the transformation, than to be pushed into it with a crisis.  Some change is inevitable.  It happens whether we want it to or not.  Other change is optional.  We choose to initiate a process of change, or we choose to not go down that road.

Change can be hard.  It requires no extra effort to settle for the same old thing.  Auto-pilot keeps us locked into past patterns.  But transforming your life?  That requires courage, commitment and effort.  It’s tempting to stay camped in the zone of That’s-Just-How-It-Is.  But to get to the really good stuff in life, you have to be willing to become an explorer and adventurer.

  – John Mark Green

For example.  We can chose to continue our education to go to college, or to not do so.  Either choice is a path that we can take.  What we choose may depend on our belief in ourselves to make it happen, the actions that we take to make it happen.  If we say we want to attend college, but don’t enroll, apply for student loans, etc… it is like waiting for a train to come down a track that is no longer in service.  We can sit there all week, but the train isn’t coming.  Life will present open doors to us, but we still have to get up and walk through the doors – we have to take action.

The best way to initiate change in our lives is to do small simple steps that bring joy to our hearts.  Take the example of college.  You might first start checking out the options.  Go online and google “colleges near me”.  Bible colleges, Cosmetology or Massage Schools, a traditional community college, a state college.  A two year degree or a four year degree?  Write down a few of the local colleges and contact the Admissions office and arrange a tour.  Meet some of the students and professors.  Sit in on a class.  Interview with an Admissions officer.  Pick up financial aid forms.  All of these are small steps to help you start towards your goals.

Maybe you have to work fulltime, and so you go through some of the same steps for an online college.  Including finding out from your HR department if the company will pick up some or all of your tuition or book fees, etc..

Once you have taken on some of the smaller action steps, it becomes easier to now turn in the financial aid package and actually enroll in some classes.  Of course, some of the changes in your life now will be a little harder to manage, as you now have class work time and homework that needs to fit into your schedule.  You will have to make sacrifices in time and money to bring this goal to its completion, but look at what you will have at the end.  You have an education; you can now get a better job.  You might be inspired to go on towards a masters degree or PHD.  But really what you have, is the knowledge that with some hard work and sacrifice, you can accomplish big goals in your life.  You can become a change agent.

The best thing you could do is MASTER the chaos in you.  You are not thrown into the fire.  YOU ARE THE FIRE.

  – Mama Indigo

So what are the changes in your life that you have the intention to make?  What are the changes you been putting off?  What are the things on your “to do” list that remain “just” a good intention?  The things that never take flight, because you just keep transferring it to a new piece of paper, never completing them? 

Take action!  An inch of movement will bring you closer to your goals than a mile of intention. 

 – Dr. Steve Maraboli

Sometimes you just need to put a different perspective to what you intend to do.  Try making a game out of it to get you started.  That could be the first step to take you miles down the road of action.

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Make Your Own Path, Be Your Own Hero

People living deeply have no fear of death – Anais Nin

Living your life so that fear of death can never enter your heart is a tall order. It would mean looking at your thoughts, words, deeds, and actions through a light of always being the best person you can be, and forgiving yourself when you fall short, and resolve to do better.  I have always believed that at death we go on to the next great adventure.  I have more of a regret that it might come too soon, because I have so many things yet to accomplish with my life. 

Trouble no one about their religion, respect others in their view and demand that they respect yours – if just this one sentence was followed by every living person, our world would have true peace.  

It is really interesting when you learn about other cultures, other religions, people with different languages.  Words don’t always translate across from language to language.  Even when you are raised in the same language, same country, same religion there are differences.  Going from the north of the United States to the south can be a culture shock.  Going from the country to the big city, can be a big culture shock.  You tend to judge others when you don’t understand.

Your experience of life doesn’t have to create a barrier with someone who’s had a difference experience.  Instead, if you can widen out your mind to try and truly understand another person’s experience of life, you gain their respect, and they gain yours.

One of the truest signs of maturity is the ability to disagree with someone while still remaining truthful – Dave Willis

It is difficult to feel greatness after a lapse of 200 years, but Tecumseh truly seems admirable. He was noble in his speech and behavior, adamant in his opposition to U.S. expansion, farsighted in his policies, brave in battle, yet merciful and protective toward captives – Devin Bent in Tecumseh: A Brief Biography, said of Tecumseh

Appreciation is a wonderful thing.  It makes what is excellent in others belong to us as well – Voltaire

Listen To Your Heart, Hear The Music Of Your Soul

“Listen to the wind, it talks. Listen to the silence, it speaks. Listen to the heart, it knows” – Native American Proverb

The visual here is of listening to nature. The wind, the silence of the deep night, that is the time our heart speaks. The mind quiets in expectation of what might happen. It waits in silence to see what the soul wants to be expressed. Then it becomes busy with plans and ideas and arguments for and against every thought.

“It’s the heart that knows the path, the mind is just there to organize the steps”– Jeff Brown

Your heart knows things that your mind can’t explain. When you drop down into your heart to listen, it is like listening to God, as he answers our prayers. There is a peace to it that is hard to explain. There are what I term “Kairos” moments, where the connection to mind, body and soul are wide open. Into the depths of the open space time stands still. There is an awakening, a sigh, a moment of seeing something out of the corner of the eye. In the space between the inhale and exhale of breath God speaks to us.

Like the stillness of a lake, where not even the breath of wind disturbs the surface. Then there is a single rain drop that hits the center of the lake, and the ripple slowly spreads out to lap at the shoreline. Then another drop, and another drop, a downpour begins. The ripples expand out and over each other. The surface of the water is in chaos. Each ripple ends at a different part of the shore, spreading out the details and nuances of the message. And suddenly our soul knows the answer that we have been seeking. All of this happening between the inhale and the exhale.

“Open your heart to hear the sweet, pure, positive and loving messages of your soul” – Sue Krebs 

You will need some time to take in all of the messages received. Time to process, to both reason and accept without reasoning. When the mind, body and soul are all on a wide open connection, it can seem overpowering. But like the music of the orchestra, if you just slow down your life for a moment, you can hear each instrument as it enters and leaves the music being played.

Disconnect from the electronics for a space of time; no T.V. no radio, no IPhone, no internet. Just sit in contemplation, remembering the messages, the conversation. Just sit, listen and accept. Know that what journey your soul is telling you to take, it is the perfection of divine timing to begin it now.

“Be bold enough to use your voice, brave enough to listen to your heart and strong enough to live the life you’ve always imagined” – Unknown

Your mind will bring in the chaos of the world . Churning your mind into a tornado, it can tear huge holes in your inner peace. It can bring up every mistake, every omission, every single thing that can be viewed as failure to tell you not to take this journey. Not to step upon that particular path. It whips you and beats you with dark images until guilt pours over your heart, drowning it in sorrow that you are unworthy, incapable of going on this journey. It creates confusion and makes you feel lost from your purpose. That you didn’t really understand the message correctly.

“Talk to yourself in two languages – what do I fear and what do I love – in order to balance the body and the soul” – Peter Shepherd

That is when it is vital to listen to your heart and soul. Your heart and soul does not lie about who you are, and why you are here. Listening to your heart you will uncover a wild uncharted world. You will learn what is meant for you, not what others want for you.

When you follow the directions of the cars guidance system, you are listening to someone else tell you how to travel on your life’s journey. You will travel to your destination the fastest route, but are those directions the right way to your destination? You won’t pull off the freeway and travel the backroads. You won’t stop at interesting small towns and walk through shops and find treasures. You won’t meet that interesting older couple in a diner that talk about what it was like when they were young. You will miss out on the life you are supposed to be living.

It takes boldness and courage to listen, because if you are truly open hearted and honest, there are shadows within all of us. This is when you have to be bold in using your voice. You have to be brave enough to stand up, even as you acknowledge that you are not infallible. At your hearts core is a strength that will help you stay in the fight of living the life you have always imagined you could have. It is easy to plan out this kind of life, but life has a way of bypassing your plans and going off in its own directions.

When nothing is making sense in your life, that is when you have to fall in love with every detail of what is happening. When you have to remember, that life is happening for you, not to you. It really comes down to attitude and perspective in the end.

“In the end, only three things matter: how much you loved, how gently you lived, and how gracefully you let go of the thing not meant for you” – Unknown

“People will want you to behave in a certain way, to make a certain choice because it reinforces the way they see the world.  But you have to do what’s right for you” – Unknown

As always, if you can’t figure out the questions to ask yourself, if self discovery is a puzzle you’ve yet to solve – contact us.  We are here for you.

We Are Stronger Than We Know