Love Is The Master Key To Happiness

Love yourself.  Forgive yourself.  Be true to yourself.  How you treat yourself sets the standard for how others treat you.

  – Steve Maraboli

Years ago I worked for a mortgage company in the Seattle, WA area.  When I interviewed for a loan processor position, the branch manager told me that I shouldn’t take the job if swearing bothered me, as everyone in her office swore.  I am good at tuning out what I don’t want to hear, so I went ahead and accepted the position. 

I had been on the job just a month or two when one of the other employees in the branch came up to me with a question.  She wanted to know what I had said to everyone that made them not swear when I was part of the conversation.  I told her that I hadn’t even realized that they didn’t swear when they spoke to me, and that I hadn’t told them anything.  She wanted to know why they were treating her different than they treated me.  I told her something like the above quote.  We subconsciously tell people how to treat us.  If she wasn’t being treated how she wanted to be, then she needed to look inside of herself to determine what needed to be changed.

Our job is to love others without stopping to inquire whether or not they are worthy.

  – Unknown

I think that the hardest part about giving and receiving love is that it puts us at risk of being hurt.  We worry about whether this new being in our lives will hurt us, if we open our hearts up to giving and receiving love. 

Faith ends where worry begins, and worry ends where faith begins.

  –  George Mueller

My father (stepfather) married my mother, and took on six girls ranging in ages from newborn to 9 yrs old (I was the 9 yr old).  Not one time in over 49 yrs has the word “stepdaughter” ever come out of his mouth.  Every time it has been “my daughter”.  My parents went on to have one more child, my brother, who is my dads only “blood” child.  My brother and my dad have a rocky relationship.  What so many of us had a hard time with, is that we want people to behave in a certain way.  We want a mother, father, spouse, brother or sister, to say or do certain things, and when they fall short of our expectations, we create trauma around it. 

When you love someone, you love the whole person just as he or she is, and not as you would like them to be.

  –  Leo Tolstoy

My mom passed away over 20 yrs ago, and our dad has been living with my husband and I for the past 11 years.  A couple of years ago, my brother and I had a long talk about his dad, and why I maintained our relationship after our mother died. With those that we love in our lives, our close friends and relatives, it can be easy to look at their faults.  To see all of the “dirt” in their lives.  Those faults pop up like neon lights blinking and blinking, “look here”, but there are also hidden nuggets of gold laying alongside each fault line.

None of us can be the perfect parent, son, daughter, sister, brother, or spouse.  It has meant a lot to me that “step” never came before daughter.  He has other well hidden (LOL) nuggets of gold, and he has his share of dirt, just like every one of us.  We need to adjust our “glasses” to see others through the filters of gold, instead of just neon signs of dirt. 

At the same time, we can’t live our own lives trying to live up to the expectations of others. 

Stop seeing yourself through the eyes of others.  You will never be able to live up to their expectations, and it will leave you feeling broken and insecure… Rather see yourself as the beautiful soul God made you to be, and know he made you to do great things.

  –  Karen Kastyla

Have your ever looked at yourself through the “fun house” mirrors at a fair?  They distort your shape, making you tall, small, thin, fat.  Some of them distort just a portion of your body and others the entire body.  When we try to live our lives for others, we distort ourselves creating a fun house mirror – we don’t see us, we just see the distortion. 

This is your own journey.  Don’t let others define it for you.  You shape the path of your journey through your effort, hard work, love, aspirations, dreams and always your pure intention.

  –  Abira Mukherjee

When I look at this photo, I see love on both the mans and the cats faces.  The cat doesn’t expect the man to act like another cat.  The man doesn’t expect the cat to be a dog.  They see the nuggets of gold in each other.  Their love is apparent.  They may not live up to 100% of the expectations.  And that failure to live up to expectations, doesn’t mean that they damn up their love behind a concrete barrier, demanding that the other behave a certain way. 

I know that my cats expect breakfast each morning the minute my feet hit the bedroom floor.  Since during the week I get up at 5 AM, on Saturday, Sunday, and any holidays, they still expect breakfast at 5 AM.  They seem to live with the disappointment (although they can be quite demanding and noisy about it – LOL).   They still rub up against me purring.  They still hop in my lap and try to type on the keyboard when I am busy.  I still pet them, feed them, and cuddle them.  I know that I will have to remove at least one cat every time I sit down at the keyboard to compose one of these posts.  I accept their need to interrupt me when I am not paying them enough attention, and they accept that I am eventually going to shut them out of the office so I can finish my post without kitty paws typing. (I blame all spelling errors on my cats!).

In the end nothing we do or say in this lifetime will matter as much as the way we have loved one another.

  –  Daphne Rose Kingma

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Change Yourself, Change The World

“Your soul is a compass.  Change one coordinate in your spiritual compass and you change your entire life’s direction”– Caroline Myss

You are here to discover what your work in this world is to be, and once you’ve found it, to pursue it with passion.

Every night in your dreams, your imagination and creativity go to work to find what answers you are looking for. You need to ask yourself some powerful questions to put that time to good use.  I highly recommend a dream journal.

Every night take just a few moments to center.  Review your day.  Now ask your soul for the perfect question to dream about.  Then write that question down in your journal.  Go to sleep with that question in your thoughts.  Record any dreams that you can remember upon awakening.

If you make this a practice every night, you will start dreaming the answers.  It might take a little while for your subconscious to get what you are doing.  But if you are consistent, answers will start happening.

It is up to you when you wake up, to bring those dreams into reality. Following your passions is critical, because it is the key to unlocking the hidden door to your purpose. 

“With one kind gesture you can change a life.  One person at a time, you can change the world.  One day at a time, we can change everything”  –  Dr. Steve Maraboli

Be passionate about seeking for the truth, instead of assuming you already know it. Everything you know about life is constantly changing. If you become dogmatic about a definition or interpretation of what your life is about, you will get stuck in a falsehood.

Think of all of the inventions that are commonplace around you, that were considered at one time to be impossible. Men walking on the moon, spaceships, submarines, airplanes, cell phones, computers, etc… 

Blaze your own trail with the understanding that if you come to a dead end; a road closed sign; if you see that the bridge is out; or a mudslide or avalanche has blocked your passage, it isn’t because you chose the wrong way.  You didn’t fail, and you don’t have to just stop right there and refuse to move.  You don’t whine and moan about how unfair life is, and how you should just give up. 

“When you know who you are; when your mission is clear and you burn with the inner fire of unbreakable will; no cold can touch your heart; no deluge can dampen your purpose  You know that you are alive”  – Chief Seattle

There is a purpose and meaning in everything that you do. Along that road to your destiny, you gathered up items that you will need for your continued journey.  You may not yet recognize why they are required. What seems like the “end of the road”, is just a sign for you to continue your journey blazing your own path.  

Recognize that it has always been a small group of thoughtful people that change the world. 

Think of Florence Nightingale; Martin Luther King Jr; Mother Teresa; Gandhi; Malala; Jane Goodall; Nelson Mandela and so on.  All people who impacted the world not by an invention or making it rich, but by how they lived their lives to a passionate calling.  I call these world changers, LemonadeMakers.

Your profession or calling is what you’re put here on earth to do. So do it with such passion and intensity that it becomes spiritual in its calling. This is how you find the “great work” that Steve Jobs spoke about. The only way to do great work, is to love what you do.

Don’t settle by believing in the naysayers that say it can’t be done.  Some of you reading this right now are meant to change the world.  To spark the brains of others to help you do so.  Some of you reading this right now, are meant to hold everything together for those who do.  Trust your instincts and do the very thing that they say can’t be done.

Don’t be afraid to fail, be afraid to not even try.  It is how you find out who you really are.

“If you cannot do great things, do small things in a great way” – Unknown

You have been placed on this earth to discover your own path.  You will never be happy, living someone else’s idea of life. Unless you are a little madly insanely passionate about it, it’s a waste of time, and a waste of your abilities and gifts. Never stop believing that you can do what the divine put you here to do.

Risk comes from the uncertainty of not knowing what you are doing, but at the same time knowing that you have to try anyway. Take risks, because that kind of action is what changes the world. The people who didn’t know it couldn’t be done are the people who do it. Then everyone does it.

It all starts with one voice calling out of the wilderness.  Small acts performed by many people, can change the world.

“The most dangerous risk of all – the risk of spending your life not doing what you want on the bet you can buy yourself freedom to do it later”  – Unknown

And most of all choose to listen to that inner voice, and not the random opinions of others. That whisper from the heart that tells you that you are not to be one of the mediocre things in life. That whispering voice that says to chase curiosity. Chase your passion.

Live a life worth living. A life that says, “I am a certified, bona fide, being of light, capable of transcending all fears and manifesting all dreams.” (words in quotes adapted from Notes From the Universe).  Talk with people who will make you see the world differently.  People from different lifestyles and cultures.  People from all kinds of backgrounds. 

It helps you to understand yourself from a different perspective.  It grows and shifts you into a better human being.  It helps you to uncover what kind of difference you want to make in the world.

“Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life”  –  Steve Jobs

Or as Spock always said, “Live long and prosper” – so go out and change the world!

I Can Because I Am Limitless. I Am Because I Know No Boundaries

Have you ever had a healing crisis? A healing crisis isn’t just a health related crisis. It can be healing any part of our life that just isn’t working out the way we know that it should.

Nothing has transformed my life more than listening to what needed to be heard.

  – Jeffrey Shaw 

Years ago, when I was first working in the financial industry I had just received a huge promotion. I was really working hard, and for some reason, the different aspects of the job were just not working out right. I finally had a long talk with my boss, and following her advice I turned things around. I knew that I was perfectly capable of doing the job, but I just couldn’t figure out why it wasn’t working. I think that at different shifting points in our lives we run up against this road block. We need a different set of eyes to see what needs to be seen. To see what needs to be transformed.

If you’re trying to achieve, there will be roadblocks.  I’ve had them; everybody has had them.  But obstacles don’t  have to stop you.  If you run into a wall, don’t turn around and give up.  Figure out how to climb it, go through it, or work around it.

  – Michael Jordan

Do you know why Michael Jordan was so successful?  This quote gives us a clue.  He didn’t reach a roadblock and say, “oh well, I guess I am not talented enough to do this”; or “oh well, I guess this dream was just too big for me to accomplish”.  No, he practiced until he was able to break it down.   He worked with coaches who were able to help him see what he couldn’t see.

Remember that your greatest talent is so much more powerful than your biggest fear.

  – Unknown

There comes a time when we need to take a calculated risk. If you look at the game of baseball it really speaks to calculated risk. The player who is on first base, will watch the pitcher, the batter, and outfielders to gauge how far off the base he can go without getting caught. If he gauges it correctly, he can steal a base, or even make it to 3rd base with an infield hit from the batter because of getting the head start.

I think sometimes you forget that you were born to be awesome.  (here’s your reminder)

  – Unknown

In our lives, if we risk nothing, we get nothing. In personal transformation, we need to take calculated risks. In our life of personal growth, in order to grow we have to take our foot off the safe “base” we are on. We need to risk opening the chrysalis with the hope that we have finished our transformation, and the wings are ready to fly.

Risk more than others think is safe. Care more than others think is wise. Dream more than others think is practical. Expect more than others think is possible.

   – Ronnie Max Oldham

This really is the only way to live your life. Not putting off things until we think it is safe. Really opening our hearts completely in how we care about others. To understand that the reality is that almost anything is possible. Whatever is currently stumping you, just means that you are not asking the right questions, or the right people for help.

Our thoughts are very powerful. When we focus on what we lack, we create blockages and limitations. We become imprisoned by the vibration of our negative energy.

  – Randi G Fine

In other words if we think that we can’t we will be a self fulfilling prophecy.

If you think you can or you think you can’t you are right.

  – Henry Ford

I find myself doing this sometimes. I stress about not having enough time and sure enough, unforeseen stuff starts filling up my life. Then I catch myself, and unlock the door to that cage, freeing myself and all of a sudden, the stuff just starts going away and I have my time back to do what needs to be done.

Remember, the moment you accept total responsibility for everything in your life is the moment you claim the power to change anything in your life.

  – Hal Elrod

So if you find yourself in any sort of “healing crisis” at the moment, just take some time to meditate as to how you just lost yourself in the woods. Transform the path by backing up or regrouping. Get back on the path that you were traveling.

And once the storm is over, you won’t remember how you made it through, how you managed to survive.  You won’t even be sure whether the storm is really over.  But one thing is certain.  When you come out of the storm, you won’t be the same person who walked in.  That’s what the storm’s all about.

  – Haruki Murakami

This is another critical piece of the transformation puzzle, in really getting to know oneself. 

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Believe In Your Potential For Greatness, It Is Your Gift To The World

Do you believe that you are destined for greatness? It took me quite a bit of time to believe that about myself. Compliments have always been hard for me to accept. It always felt like I wasn’t truly worthy. Like you were just being nice to me, but didn’t really mean it.

It is safe to feel like you are an “ok” type of person, but greatness feels like I am being mistaken for someone else. It carries with it the undertone of responsibility, and the potential of being weighed and found wanting. It has the danger of being found to be a fraud, not being as advertised.  That there are those waiting for the mistake so that they can pounce on it and say, “I knew she wasn’t that great.”

There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve:  The fear of failure.

  – Paulo Coelho

I’ve always accepted the compliment that I was “smart”, because I worked hard for the good grades. Writing about things that I have experienced in my life, and what I have learned about life is really easy. Not that I don’t spend time putting these posts together, because I do. It can take hours sometimes, but it isn’t the “chore” that it is for so many people. It is a gift that just flows. So because of that, it is harder to accept the compliments, because it doesn’t feel like I have earned them with hard work.

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.  Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.

  – Marianne Williamson

At some point in our life, we say “enough” to the doubter voice inside of us. That voice that says we have to make ourselves small so that we are not noticed; that voice that whispers no one else feels or thinks like we do, so don’t voice your opinions or let anyone know how you think or feel (you don’t want to be the outcast).

The fears that we don’t face becomes our limits.

  – Robin Sharma

Then there is the distraction button that gets pulled every time you sit down to figure out your destiny. It convinces you to clean up something – the kitchen floors need to be mopped. To watch that TV show, after all you deserve to sit down and relax, you worked hard all day. The phone rings and it is that friend or relative that talks for hours about nothing. Or you get attacked by the shiny objects that glistens and gleams until you pay attention to it, or as my dog used to say “squirrel!”.

If an egg is broken from the outside, life ends. If an egg is broken from the inside, life begins. Greats things always begin from the inside.

  –  Unknown

How do we begin from the inside to crack that shell of protection that we have built around ourselves?

Instead of being distracted, we can instead begin the conversation with the doubter to bring them in to support us. That is when we are ready to ascend another level in our consciousness. We are ready and because of that, doors appear and begin to open to us. We are ready once again to enter into the chrysalis and transform from our current being into a new one.

This advancement is transforming us from being a crawler towards our dreams and life purpose, into a flier. We are transforming from following a leader, to becoming a leader. We strike out on fulfilling our life purpose through the work that we are doing.

Set a goal so big you can’t achieve it until you grow into the person who can.

  – Unknown

We are beginning the path to greatness, with the spiritual joy of choosing our own adventure. Did you ever read the “Choose Your Own Adventure” books as a kid, or to your kids? Each chapter gave you choices as to where you would go next. We become co-creators of our life path, designing the way our divine purpose is fulfilled in the world.

I am not here to change the world.  I am changing the world because I am here.

  – Lisa Wilson

We are free not only to dream of a better life, we are free to “make it so”. Like a phoenix, we die to our old way of living by hiding you we are. We are reborn as we rise from the ashes, a newly made creation that passes through the gates of greatness.

Living by faith includes the call to something greater than cowardly self preservation.

  – J.R.R. Tolkien

As we leave the chrysalis, we leave behind all of the old stories. We are vulnerable, because we are opening ourselves up to take new risks – which means we don’t know the answers anymore. This landscape is completely new.

Like Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz we will have adventures. Some of them will be scary. We might end up asleep again in the field of poppies. We might have adversity chasing after us like the flying monkeys. We might discover that the people we thought would have all of the answers don’t. We might even discover the truth, that the one with the answers lives inside of our hearts and has been directing us the entire journey.

We have greatness within us; innovative, giving, determined.  It’s time for the best in us to come out.

  – Unknown

We begin to see our own unrealized potential. Becoming both awake and aware, we learn how to discern the correct paths to take, the best actions to make. We learn to raise our vibrational energy to attract what we need in our lives. We learn the secrets of manifestation. We understand for the first time, the truth of how we can design our own life. That we really do have that kind of power.

It is not the strength of the body that counts, but the strength of the spirit.

  – J.R.R. Tolkien

Magic comes into our lives because we are listening to the voice of the divine. Even before we can voice what we need, the door opens and there is exactly what we just realized we need. This doesn’t mean that we won’t be mesmerized by the voices calling out in fear. It doesn’t mean that we won’t be distracted or derailed again and again. But because we have awakened and become more aware, we recognize them for what they are sooner, and they delay us less and less. We recover faster.

The truth about you is that you are easily capable of greatness.

  – Fabienne Fredrickson

It is time for each of us to recognize our divine gifts. To answer the calling to greatness. To summon the abilities, we each have within us. It is time to rise up and live a life that is on purpose. To live a passionate life. To answer the call, instead of putting it on hold or pressing the mute button. It is time to stretch ourselves. To push the internal boundaries. To leap up and be true to who we really are.

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Strong Women Stand In The Storm And Adjust Their Sails

Let go of what you thought life was all about.  Let go of your expectations of life and people.  Let go of holding on to something so hard that you become brittle, hard, and breakable.  Let go, so that you can move forward.  Be a once in a lifetime kind of woman, build a castle with all of the bricks that others throw at you.  When women are connected and collaborate together, they are the most transformational force on our world.  Probably in our universe.  When you have your whole tribe behind you, you are fearless, because you know that they have your back.

A woman is like a tea bag.  You never know how strong it is until it’s in hot water.

  – Eleanor Roosevelt

Have you ever watched someone who isn’t the type of look that is considered beautiful?  Someone who is so confident and centered in who they are, that they radiate something beyond beautiful.  It is like you can’t not look at them.  They are so comfortable being overweight, or too short, or boyish looking – whatever isn’t considered by the masses to be like a model.  Even so they show us the true essence of beauty.

Embracing your true self radiates a natural beauty that cannot be diluted or ignored.  Confident, powerful, untamable, badass you!

  – Dr. Steve Maraboli

Life tests all of us.  We all get some lemons in our life.  Each time we make lemonade from those lemons we rise up.  We become stronger.  And what is so important to remember is that we are ALWAYS strong enough, even when we think we aren’t.  This is what the whole “make lemonade out of lemons” is all about. 

There is a purpose in each lemon that life gives us.  It is to help us reach back to that dream we had when we were a little girl.  To fulfill that promise that you made to yourself that when you grew up, you were going to . . . , whatever that fill in the blank is.  Don’t disappoint that little girl.  Go out there and create the fulfillment of that dream.  There are thousands of other little girls who are looking for inspiration and encouragement, that they too can fulfill their dreams.  Be brave and be that woman!  Be an empowered woman with vision.  Give to yourself the grace to achieve what you set out to do, and self awareness to do it with a soft heart and honest open arms.

Ask for what you want, and be prepared to get it.  

  –  Maya Angelou

It is better to have a heart without words, unable to express what is crying to come out, than to offer words without the hearts emotion contained within them.  Prayer is a longing of the soul to be expressed in a way, that mere words cannot but fail to express.  The heart speaks to the soul, and it listens to what the soul has to say.  This is the birth of inspiration, the breath of life itself.  Hold on to the vision in your heart.  Trust the process, life’s lemons, in order to bring that vision into reality.

We need women who are so strong they can be gentle, so educated they can be humble, so fierce they can be compassionate, so passionate they can be rational, and so disciplined they can be free.

  – Kavita Ramdas

I heard the expression today of “The Moon Shot”.  What it was referencing was the attitude that was displayed when President Kennedy said that we were going to the moon.  No one had any idea how to do it, but he energized the nation to figure out a way to do it.  Give your life a “Moon Shot” experience.  Shoot for something that you have never done, or don’t even think is possible for your to do.  Give it everything you have to bring that moon shot vision into your own reality.  Believe.  Act as if.  Live like you have already accomplished it.

I am not what has happened to me.  I am what I choose to become.

  – Carl Jung

As you move down the path of creating your own Moon Shot experience, forgive yourself whenever what you are trying doesn’t work.  Forgive others when they don’t believe in you, and even when they try to stop you.  Forgive God whenever you hit the frustration button and start blaming him, bemoaning your life experience.  Forgive any situations that create heartache, anger, and bitterness in your life.  Forgive yourself for not being, or doing something different.  Let all of the anger, fear, frustration – all of the negative emotions that you have been carrying around, flow free from your heart and soul.  Stop giving failure a negative meaning.  Realize that when you turn that lemon into lemonade, the experience becomes a powerful blessing to you and others.

There is no force equal to a woman determined to rise.

  – W.E.B. Dubois

Self awareness is an amazing gift that we can give to ourselves.  Take notice of what shows up in your life.  Who and what you are attracting into your life.  There is a map inside of you, that tells you where you are, and where you are going.  But you have to be self aware to read it.  Otherwise, it is like listening to six people talk at once, each one in a foreign language.  You know they are saying something important, but you can’t make head or tails of it.  Self awareness is necessary to move the mountains in our life.  Self awareness is what makes life’s journey a full on mountain climbing experience. 

I know it’s hard to women to tap into that feeling of self-worth.  We need to get the message out that you are valued, your are a goddess and don’t forget that.

  – Jennifer Lopez

Don’t let anyone tell you it can’t be done.  That you aren’t capable of doing it.  Don’t hide yourself.  Don’t demean yourself.  Don’t let anyone or anything get in your way.  Claw your way up and out, fight for what you believe in, for your dreams and visions.  Choose your battles and don’t give up.  Be the strong, powerful, confident, driven woman that you are.

I believe I’ve always been a big believer in equality.  No one has ever been able to tell me I couldn’t do something because I was a girl.

  – Anne Hathaway

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Seize The Opportunities, Make Life Happen For You, Not To You

 It is our attitude about the “opportunities” that can enlighten us, or limit us.  When we approach what we see with an open mind, what we often find is that we make exciting new discoveries.  Sometimes we might feel that we are in a good place.  That the risk of something greater means you leave behind something good enough.  If we are not willing to take the risks, we will fall short of what we are capable of.  Taking risks is how we learn something new.  The woman in this picture is obviously taking a huge risk.  I would venture to guess that she is about to experience a huge growth spurt.

Opportunity often comes in disguised in the form of misfortune, or temporary defeat.

  –  Napoleon Hill

She appears to be in the middle of the ocean, with sharks swimming around her.  No oars or sails for the boat can be seen.  No engine to move the boat and herself out of danger.  No life jacket, no weapons to fight off the sharks.  Just an evening dress and an umbrella. Whatever she started with, whatever her plans were, everything seems to have failed her.  It would appear that she was willing to risk the “usual” for the unusual.  That she was tired of the “ordinary” and went far outside the box of the comfort zone.

Failure should be our teacher, not our undertaker.  Failure is delay, not defeat.  It is a temporary detour, not a dead end.

  –  Denis Waitley

When you look at her though, you don’t see any signs of defeat.  She appears to be looking around her, taking stock of the situation.  She doesn’t appear to have the body language of defeat, but rather someone who is looking for an opportunity to be successful in her journey, to arrive at the destination she left the shore for.  This experience is going to be a great story one day.  This reminds me of a situation for a McGyver T.V. show, the situation appears hopeless, but she doesn’t.

The Chinese use two brush strokes to write the word “crisis”.  One brush stroke stands for danger; the other for opportunity.  In a crisis, be aware of the danger, but recognize the opportunity.

  –  John F Kennedy

What she is, is ready for whatever opportunity presents itself.  You can see her looking around, not at the sharks, but what is further off in the distance.  Sometimes we need to seize the opportunity, no matter what the risk.  Sometimes in getting lost to make your dreams come true, you find a better dream than you started with.  She is on an amazing journey with no one to rely on but herself and her faith that everything will turn out right.  If it is never needed, it won’t be called.  Sometimes the journey has to be travelled alone in order to bring up the strengths that lie deep within us. 

When one door closes another opens.  But often we look so long, so regretfully upon the closed door that we fail to see the one that has opened for us.

  –  Helen Keller

Looking backwards, blaming others or ourselves does not create the momentum that is needed for change. 

A Wise man will make more opportunities than he finds.

  –  Francis Bacon

It is up to her, just like it is up to us, to keep looking forward, for something that can be used to our advantage.  Even though the odds do not appear to be in her favor, it is important that she keep a positive attitude and keep looking for where opportunity is hiding.  It is her forward looking vision that is going to find what she needs to be successful.

Opportunity dances with those already on the dance floor.

  –  H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

It is when we are in the most challenging times, that we discover what we are made off.  We discover the power within us.  Power that we didn’t know, or dare to believe that we have.  This is the part of us that realizes sometimes failure is just not going to work for us, because what we are facing is way beyond that door.  It is finding that brave person hidden deep inside of us, that person that says, screw this.  That person who kicks the lock off the door, rips it open, and says here I am, so what are you going to do about it? 

There is no such thing as failure, there’s just giving up too soon.

  – Jonas Salk

Opportunity is everywhere.  The ocean constantly changes.  The winds of change both blow and calm the seas.  When we lose sight of our dreams, we just need to wait for the clouds to blow away, and let the moonlight reveal what we have been looking for.  We just need to adjust our vision to see it.  What we can’t see, is what she sees off in the distance.  She is looking forward.  She can see that just beyond her current reach, is a new opportunity to reach her destination.

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Don’t Wait, Do It Now

Hopefully I am not the only one that this happens to.  On my commute to work and back to home, my brain is so busy detailing everything I have to do – both at work and at home.  The minute I step into my office or my home, that list magically hides itself.  I forgot most of what I have to do, being busy doing so many other things.  Then the minute my head hits the pillow, the list reappears as a list of everything that I didn’t get done.  Does anyone else go through this?

Why is taking action so hard?  We have these dreams, passions around our life.  The space between a dream and reality is where all of the action has to take place.  We want whatever the dream is.  We talk about it all of the time.  “Don’t wait for your feelings to change to take the action.  Take the actions and your feelings will change”  Barbara Baron. 

We tend to put off the hard parts.  The parts where we aren’t sure what to do.  I do it everyday.  Put off the conversation I don’t want to have with a friend, relative or co-worker.  Put off studying for a test because I am afraid of failing it.  Not asking for what I want, because what if they say no?  I am sure that this list could go on forever.  The key is to just take a first step, then one more.  Don’t look at the whole mountain that needs to be climbed, just look at the next few steps.

I always think about physical workouts here.  If you are on a treadmill, and your goal is five miles.  You start to get worn out and out of breath on mile three.  Those next two miles seems like impossible.  Seems like forever.  Seems like Mount Everest.  Seems like you can’t do it.  But here is where a little stubbornness comes in handy.  You just tell yourself five more minutes, and you take the next step and the next step, and before you know it, that fifth mile is done.  Be proud of every next step, not just the one that puts you over the goal.

“We are what we repeatedly do.  Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.”  Aristotle.  It is important that these lists are not just a grocery list or a laundry list.  Things that take up time and space, but are not really taking a step.  That is the first step of procrastination.  What I call the shiny object or squirrel.  Have you seen the cartoon, where the dog is doing or saying something, then shouts squirrel and takes off right in the middle of it?  That is a squirrel.  I come into my office to write this blog post.  Then I see some mail that I forgot to take care of yesterday and so I do that.  Then an email comes in, so I read that.  Then I think of something I wanted to research and I do that.  Two hours later, I haven’t written a single word of the post I came in to write.  That is chasing the squirrel.  I didn’t really take a single step toward writing that post, and now my time is gone.

The best that we can do is to promise ourselves to be better and do better.  The best that we can do is to keep trying, putting one foot in front of the other.  To ask ourselves, what is the most important thing I can do right this moment to take that next step, and then just take it.  Don’t wait for permission.  Don’t wait for the perfect moment.  Don’t wait for anything, just take that next step.  We might fall down.  We might get hurt or do what we later judge to be the wrong thing.  It doesn’t in the big picture matter.  What matters is that we took what we saw to be the next step.  The funny thing about life, is that those steps that we judged to be wrong, are usually the steps that give us what we need for a future step.  So that, in the long run, none of the steps were really wrong.

“I promise myself,

To be so strong that nothing can disturb my peace of mind.

To talk health, happiness, and prosperity to every person I meet.

To make all my friends feel that there is something worthwhile in them.

To look at the sunny side of everything and make my optimism come true.

To think only of the best, to work only for the best and to expect only the best.

To be just as enthusiastic about the success of others as I am about my own.

To forget the mistakes of the past and press on to the greater achievements of the future.

To give so much time to improving myself that I have no time to criticize others.

To be too large for worry, too noble for anger, too strong for fear, and too happy to permit the presence of trouble.

To think well of myself and to proclaim this fact to the world, not in loud words, but in great deeds.

To live in the faith that the whole world is on my side, so long as I am true to the best that is in me”

Christian D. Larson

Perspective Is A Powerful Gift

” If you don’t like something, change it. If you can’t change it, change the way you think about it” ~Mary Engelbreit

It is really all about the words and the meanings that you assign to them. That is because words tell the story, and the story is what is perceived to be the truth. When in fact the truth is always just your perspective, “your” side of the story.

The only way to have the “whole truth”, is to be able to tell the story from multiple points of view. The marriage of those points of view is probably the closest that you can ever come to the “whole truth”. 

Does your story say that roses have thorns, or that thorns have roses?  It all depends on your perspective.  Both statements are true, even though it might seem contradictory.

“We don’t see things are they are.  We see them as we are” – Anis Nin

Perspective is from Latin perspectus “clearly perceived,” and is a way of regarding situations, facts, etc… and judging their relative importance.  It is something that changes in our lives as your lives change.  The perspective you have about something gets altered by life, by your own changes.  It gets altered by time. 

Have you ever had something happen to you, that at the time you viewed as the end of your world?  Something that you defined as “the worst day of your life”.  Then as the occurrence plays out over time, you do a 180-degree shift on your interpretation of the event. 

Say that you have planned the ultimate vacation, going on a cruise ship across the ocean.  Then at the last second you couldn’t go.  You are devastated. 

What if your once in a lifetime vacation was on the Titanic?  Now, whatever happened to keep you from your vacation possibly saved your life.  Now it might have shifted from the worst day.  It might now be the luckiest day.

“What you see depends not only on what you look at, but also, on where you look from” – James Deacon

You have this habit of judging yourself and others by how you respond to things in life.  You have this idea that emotions have some sort of timetable to them.  That things such as a death in the family should have a mourning time of no more than one year.  A job loss, a week or two.  A divorce should be over in six months.  And so on.  If you process it quicker, you must not have depth of feelings.  Longer, then you need to learn to let it go.  These are all just arbitrary perspectives.

I was reading a story about a mom that had lost her daughter to sudden infant death syndrome.  She was currently working with her third therapist in seven months.  She wanted to know what was wrong with her, that even though she was wearing a mask to the outside world that she was moving on in her life, she felt that she must be doing the “grief” wrong because inside she was still hurting so much.

The therapist used words that transformed how she was viewing her grief. She said you are just very sad.  The depth of your sadness is simply a measure of how much you loved your daughter.

This viewpoint of “how deeply she loved her daughter” allowed her to express the overwhelming grief, instead of bottling it all up because “seven months” had passed.  In fact, it was the bottling it up, that was not allowing the emotions to pass through.

“You have the capability to change your life all with a simple shift in perspective” – Demi Lovato

You shouldn’t be embarrassed or ashamed of expressing your genuine feelings.   Stories allow you the space to heal the pain.  Once you have healed the pain, perspective helps you to stop being a victim.

Life isn’t always fair, and no one should lose a child, no matter their age. But it happens.  Sometimes the best thing you can do, is to not obsess about how things are.  Instead take a deep breath in faith, that everything will work itself out for the best.

“People generally see what they look for, and hear what they listen for” – To Kill a Mockingbird, Harper Lee

Every day if you look for it, you can see evidence of injustice happening all over the world. It is easy to get lost in the emotions created when it happens to you or to someone you love. You see evidence of it in the news, when the world erupts in moral outrage over terrorists’ bombings, the use of a truck to run down crowds of people, or the kidnapping of the schoolgirls in Nigeria. 

Between 276 – 329 girls were kidnapped (depending on news sources) in 2014 and even though many years have passed and some of them have been released, many are still missing.  Yet the world went largely silent two years later.

You have large and small things that happen to you personally.  Your friends and family can negatively impact on your life. But hidden in the heartache and challenges are golden nuggets that are the gift of the trials and tribulations that you experience. It is all about perspective. 

It is about not only what you look at with the experience, but also where you are looking from, a point of view. Every experience has something to offer you. When my nephew was murdered, and my sister’s nonprofit that she started failed, that could have been the end of it.

But I didn’t want that to be the end of my nephew’s story. So, I created LemonadeMakers.  I want to help the small community nonprofits be more successful. I want to help encourage people to use transformation to make positive changes in their lives.  I use my writing to do this, and I am constantly looking for ways to take it one more step.

I believe with all of my heart that this is what my life has been leading me to. To this moment, to create this business to help everyone who wants to make a difference in their lives and in the world to do so.  Out of the pain of injustice, loss, and deep mourning came something good.

“My desire is to stand by the fire that burns inside of you” –Martina McBride

The smallest change in perspective can change a life. See life with new eyes and look for the gift. Pull out the telescope (big picture) or binoculars (detailed picture) and peer deep inside yourself. Dig deep and find the gold of the experience. Change the story and realize just how blessed you are.  Do your roses have thorns, or your thorns have roses?   Do you see weeds or wishes? 

“Don’t think that you’ve lost time. It took each and every situation you have encountered to bring you to the now. And now is the right time” – Asha Tyson

Now is the right time to let go of what can’t be changed and live the life that the divine has put before us, with happiness, gratitude and grace. 

Serenity Prayer For Laughter

“Through humor you can soften some of the worst blows that life delivers.  And once you find laughter, no matter how painful your situation might be you can survive it.”  Unknown.  Humor is definitely a survival tool.  But it can also be a thriving tool.  I love finding the humor of a situation.

20+ years ago, my mother was diagnosed with terminal lung cancer.  A nine centimeter tumor was attached to one lung, wrapped around her main aorta and attached to the other lung.  No operations could help her.  The radiation was able to slow it down, and buy her one year.  The last two and one-half months, my aunt, her best friend and myself formed a team of taking care of her 24/7 because she had become bedridden.  We are a funny bunch and so we found these t-shirts at the Hallmark store and wore them all of the time.  Our reason was to break up the tension that would form when our friends and relative came by to visit and basically pay their last respects. 

When they would visit they never knew what to say, so they would ask her how she was doing.  She was dying of cancer, how do you answer that question?  My mom didn’t want to talk about her pain, as she didn’t want to bring the energy down.  She wanted to share fun memories, and find something to laugh about.  So that is what we did, we found the humor in dying of lung cancer.  I am sure that some thought that we were strange, but what it did was to give me a wonderful gift.  I had the privilege of making my mom happy, right up to the end.  I discovered the true meaning of finding the gold in any situation.  I really was fine.

Every time you find humor in a situation, you win at life.  Reality has unintended humor laced throughout it.  It is up to us to find the thread and pull it.  “I think the next best thing to solving a problem is finding some humor in it.”  Frank A Clark.  Life is really made up of small things, tiny moments.  That was my big discovery in taking care of my mom.  Those tiny moments can be saved.  Then you pull them out when you need them.  A touch, a smile, laughter.  Laughter that is so hard that it actually hurts your stomach.  The kind of memories that even now you giggle over.

Think of those movies that make you laugh.  Martin Short in Pure Luck.  The Pink Panther movies.  T.V shows like Fawlty Towers with John Cleese.  The kind of shows that you have watched so many times, that you start laughing before the scene actually starts.  Don Knotts and Tim Conway in any movie they made.  The Carol Burnett Show.  These are all my list.  What’s on yours?

So  my encouragement to everyone is to look for the humor, laugh at life.  Laugh at yourself.  Experience life as it is meant to be lived.  Write your own story like Martin Short, Bill Murray, or Steve Martin is going to be producing and acting in your life as a movie.  Live your life like it is your favorite story from childhood – the one that you read over and over again.  I have read The Lord of The Rings series so many times.  I am riding across the plains with Gandalf, fighting the battles and winning the victory.  I mourn the losses and I get right back on the horse to ride forth again and again.  It is the journey that tells me who I am and who I am becoming.

The Laughing Heart by Charles Bukowski

“Your life is your life

Don’t let it be clubbed into dark submission

Be on the watch

There are ways out

There is a light somewhere

It may not be much light but

It beats the darkness

Be on the watch

The gods will offer you chances

Know them

Take them

You can’t beat death but

You can beat death in life.  Sometimes

And the more often you learn to do it

The more light there will be

Your life is your life

Know it while you have it

Your are marvelous

The gods wait to delight

In you” 

In closing, I invite you to check out our free 2017 LemonadeMakers calendar.  Just click home on this webpage and you will see our free offer.  It is made up of our audiences favorite graphics from our blog posts.  Have a Happy Holiday and wishing all of your an Amazing New Year. 

Celebrate Life – Life Gets Better With Change, Not Chance

Once upon a time, there was a wicked stepmother who tried to poison her stepdaughter with a poisoned apple. She was afraid of what Snow White was becoming.

Life is full of surprises.  Not all these surprises are pleasant, so you need to be ready for what life brings you.

  – Unknown

Deep inside of us is a protector that is afraid of us changing. Like the wicked stepmother, this protector uses fear to try and manipulate us into remaining the same. When Snow White took a bite of the apple, it put her into a deep sleep like state. Everyone thought she was dead. But she wasn’t. She was frozen in time, so that she couldn’t change.

Courage doesn’t mean you don’t get afraid.  Courage means you don’t let fear stop you.

  – Bethany Hamilton

Have you ever felt like that? So afraid of change, that you are frozen in time? Too many choices so you can’t make one? Or maybe you feel that there are no choices? 

What if I told you that 10 years from now, your life would be exactly the same?  I doubt you’d be happy.  So, why are you so afraid of change?

  –  Karen Salmansohn

Are you hiding under the bed because it suddenly occurred to you, that the monster under the bed was you? What if everything you are hiding from is just “all in your head”?  Change will not come about by waiting for some outside, unseen force to step in and make everything perfect.  We are the ones we’ve been waiting for.  We are the change that we seek.  We are the only ones who can create the change we so long for. 

The fears we don’t face become our  limits.

  – Robin Sharma

I am a big Sci-Fi fan and one of my favorite lines from the movie “Dune” is:

Fear is the mind-killer. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone, I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone, there will be nothing. Only I will remain.

  – Frank Herbert, Dune

Everything we want is on the other side of what fear is making us believe. It is all an illusion, and if we can let it pass through us and out the other side, we see the truth. It isn’t real. Only you are real.  Never be afraid to be someone new.  To try something new.  When we are bored, it is because we are staying within the limits of what we already know.  Break out of those limits. 

Only you know when you are giving maximum effort towards your goals.  Only you know who you really are, and if you truly believe in yourself.

  – Nav-Vii

That doesn’t mean that sometimes the truth behind the illusion won’t be hard to deal with. There are things in our past that we have buried, and when fear digs them up, we need to shine the light of truth on them. What we need to realize however, is that it is all buried treasure. It may be disguised as worthless junk. It might be tarnished, covered in dust and cobwebs, but if we clean it up, we can see it for what it really is.

May we ever choose the harder right, instead of the easier wrong.

  – Thomas S. Monson

Our child’s mind didn’t understand the value it has. It only felt the hurt upon receiving it, and so it was buried deep. But when fear sees us moving to change, it grabs those forgotten things we buried, and brings them up out of the dungeon to scare us back into submission. When we confront what fear brings us, and shine it up, we can see what the treasure really is. The illusion fades and only we remain.

Fear is an opportunity.  It is a fuel for courage to transform us into a finer human being.

  – Unknown

And that is when the real adventure begins. Once upon a time, . . .  I remembered that limits only exist in my mind.  Like Luke Skywalker I gathered my courage and went into the cave to face my biggest fear.  And like Luke, I discovered it was me.  I was afraid of being who I am.  I was afraid of what my full potential would require of me.  All of my life, I have been the responsible one.  The one that everyone turns to when they have a problem.  The one who can handle anything.  This gave me a feeling of worth and value. 

Our true identity is to love without fear and insecurity.  Our higher potential finds us when we set our course in that direction.  The power of love and compassion transforms insecurity.

  – Doc Childre

What the cave showed me is that I was using this as a cover.  It kept me busy.  It made me look good.  But it wasn’t growing me.  I came to the realization that while I was doing “good”, I could do better by living my true purpose in life.  By using the divine gifts I could write about myself, about the things I had experienced, about the things I had seen, and the things I had studied about for years.  To encourage not just my own personal circle of family and friends, but to gather a worldwide community through LemonadeMakers.

The key to change . . .  is to let go of fear.

  – Rosanne Cash

I had allowed the wicked stepmother to put me to sleep, but now I had to wake up.  Now I had to help others to wake up.  To help them discover for themselves what they have hidden in the cave.  To discover their own life purpose and divine gifts.  To help see that what they have been looking for is within them.  I can’t tell you what it is, but I can help you to ask the right questions, to help you get curious and set out on your own personal transformation journey.  I can applaud when you find it and walk on your true life path for your souls journey.  Cheering you on for letting go of fear and setting yourself free to be who you really are.

I alone cannot change society for the better.  But I can radically transform my own Consciousness, overturning the conditioning that limits my potential.  We can all do this, one by one.  Over time we can change ourselves to the degree that society changes from the inside out.  Giving birth to a new way of being.  Manifesting our birthright of living in a peaceful and abundant world.  Have no fear.  Trust yourself.  Live your full potential.

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Love Is A Superpower

 Admit it, as some point in your life, you wanted to have super powers.  Wonder Woman, Super Girl, Super Man, Batman or Robin, Spiderman?  What super power did you want to have?  What Super Hero do you want to be?

One of my favorite stories of my children is when my middle son Seth was around 5 years old.  We were having a costume party and he wanted to be Superman.  It wasn’t around Halloween, so I made the costume myself.  I made a cape and the Superman S was made out of felt and was on the cape, and on the leotard on his chest.  I found these wonderful red knee socks that were fuzzy and looked a lot like boots.  The costume was perfect and when he put it on the night before the party he was so excited. 

He climbed up on the back of our couch, leaped into the air, and came crashing down to the floor.  He was so mad.  He thought that if he had the costume he would be able to fly.  It took all of my ingenuity to talk him into wearing the costume for his party, because if he couldn’t fly he didn’t want to attend his own party.  I am so thankful that he chose the couch and not a high tree to jump out of – lol.

It had long since come to my attention that people of accomplishment rarely sat back and let things happen to them.  They went out and happened to things.

  –  Leonardo da Vinci

I think that a great super power is this very thing, going out and making things happen.  As women we handle many roles.  We are a mother (giving life, nurturing and believing in our children), a daughter (giving love, respect and gratitude to our parents), a wife (life sustaining devotion, inner beauty, and immense power) a sister (who will fight for you and always love you no matter what).  And many of us become care givers for our elderly parents.  All immensely challenging roles.

You laugh, cry and work harder than you ever thought you could.  Some days you’re trying to change the world and some days it’s just diapers.  Some days you love your life, and some days you wonder if you can just take one more step.  Some days like Old Mother Hubbard there is nothing in the cupboard and your wallet is empty.  But your heart is full and you have faith.  So you make it through to the next day and the next day after that.  Your heart is full, sometimes of laughter and sometimes of tears.  You have memories of your family as you grew up, and memories of raising your own.  You may not think it, but you’ve changed the world just by being in it.  On those days when one more step seems too long, remember you are a super hero.

We are strong, smart and crafty in creating a “home” and a “refuge” in the middle of a chaotic world.  We can open and close car doors, front doors, and refrigerator doors, while holding onto both children, bags of groceries, purses and a diaper bag.  We bring a new definition to multitasking as one of our super powers.

Each of us is a wonder.  We are unique, in an unrepeatable way.  The real you, is unique and the only one of you that will ever be on this earth.  Never before and never again, will there be someone just like you.  It such an amazing thing to let sink in.  You didn’t just happen to be here now.  You are here for a reason, a purpose.  A purpose that can only be accomplished, if you let the real you be up front and center.  Your super power is so needed in our world. 

We all have angels guiding us . . . , they look after us.  They heal us, touch us, comfort us with invisible warm hands . . . , what will bring their help?  Asking.  Giving,  Thanks.

  –   Sophy Burnha

We are all given the opportunity to be one of those angels among us.  Super Heroes are ordinary people who have extraordinary hearts.  If you have the power to make someone happy, that is a super power that the world needs more of. 

I think a hero is any person really intent on making this a better place for all people.

  -Maya Angelou

A kind word to a stranger.  Calling a friend when they cross your mind and not putting it off until later (when you forget).  Everyone walking today encounters a dark road at times in their life.  When they get lost in the woods and are looking for the breadcrumbs to find their way back home.  What we all need at that time is someone who is lighting the way with just a single ray of hope.  Be that ray of hope.  It just takes a smile, a listening ear, to take the time to acknowledge that you have been in that dark place too.  That is why we give, because we have all known what it feels like to be lonely, depressed, to have nothing.

I think a hero is an ordinary individual who finds strength to persevere and endure in spite of overwhelming obstacles. 

  – Christopher Reeves

Christopher Reeves not only played a hero in the movies, he was a hero in real life.  When life’s lemons took away his ability to walk, he did not give up, feel sorry for himself.  I am sure he felt like it at times, but he remained steadfast in speaking out for all of us about what really being a hero was all about.  He knew that it wasn’t important how others saw him, what was important was how he saw himself.  Because of that he continued to make a difference.

You cannot get through a single day without having an impact on the world around you.  What you do makes a difference and you have to decide what kind of difference you want to make.

  – Jane Goodall

We all have the super power to make a difference.  Most of the time we won’t even know what kind of difference we have made.  But if you were to line up 50 adults and go down the line, every single one of them would have more than one person that had made a difference in their life.  A special teacher, an Aunt or Uncle, a best friend, a stranger on the street who simply smiled at them when they needed one the most.  Probably most of the stories they would tell would surprise you.  You probably didn’t realize that what you said or did had an impact.

You want to make a difference in the world?  It starts with how you walk into a room.  Instead of saying, “Here I am” begin with “There you are”.

  – unknown

You might not know it, but you have made a difference to someone.  It may not be huge, but it matters just the same.  The really cool thing is that your influence never needs to stop.  We can affect eternity with our super powers of love.  Love can heal us.  Love can help us to grow into who we came here to be.  Love can grant us forgiveness for ourselves and others.  Love can help us to move on when it is time to let go.  Love moves us forward when it is time to return to the journey of discovering just how great we really are.  And love can inspire us to be even more than we ever dreamed.

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When You Are On Your Souls Path, There Is No Such Thing As A Real Obstacle

 We have this idea in life that there are people “out there” who have no problems. That if you have enough money, power, fame, the perfect soul mate – whatever label we put to it, then magically everything in our life would be perfect.

Wanting something is not enough.  You must hunger for it.  Your motivation must be absolutely compelling in order to overcome the obstacles that will invariably come your way.

  – Les Brown