Don’t Be Afraid To Dance Your Own Dance Of Life

In order to save myself, I must destroy first the me I was told to be – The Dreamer

When you were this girls age, you had dreams about who you wanted to be when you grew up.  You may already have been singing, or dancing, or wanting to be a doctor or lawyer.  Between this and that statement they let you know that you should choose a less challenging career than a doctor or lawyer, because you really aren’t that smart.

Or it could be more subtle where you are being directed by your parents into the career that they want for you.  That career your mom or dad wanted; or everyone in your family has this career (our family is all in the legal or medical field); or the one you want won’t be able to support you – all valid reasons by their way of thinking.

Along the way you learn to hide who you are.  You learn that others will judge you or belittle you.  So, you put on masks to conform to what friends and family expect – who they want you to dress like, look like, act like.  You hide your dreams so that no one can destroy them any further.

You learn not to trust your heart to be in others hands.  You give up on what is possible and settle for what is conforming to the needs and desires of others.  You forget who you are and what you are here for.  You no longer take part in the dance of life, but instead settle back against the wall and watch those with more courage or talent dance it in front of you.

Ten years from now, make sure you can say that you chose your life, you didn’t settle for it – Unknown

There is only one way to truly know who you are deep down inside.  You have to get in touch with your own soul.  You need to be by yourself, and sit with yourself, and just listen.

Looking back at your life, find the places where you were really happy.  Find the things that are so easy for you to do, that others find hard or impossible.  Trace back all of the threads that have your name engraved upon them.  Start picking out and removing all of the threads that are not you.  Look for the gold and silver pieces and toss out the dross.

Now look for the patterns that are left.  The amazing thing is that it usually takes you back to this age.  The age when you acted out who you really were, before society broke you like a young colt and told you who to be.  The threads of genius that are all you, can now be taken up and made into whatever pattern you want.  It is never too late to be who you were meant to be.

Sometimes when you make this journey deep into our soul, you discover that your life has to be completely shaken up.

• UPLIFT:  You are covered in dust and debris that needs to be removed.  We need to rearrange almost everything. Uplift what you buried.
• EMPOWER:  Change almost everything.   Empower your heart and soul to lead you in the right direction.
• VALIDATE:  We need to go to the place we are supposed to be.  You need to validate that your dreams are right.  You can be and do what they are leading you to.

A close friend of mine relocated from Los Angeles to Italy and she loves it.  The best thing to do is to remove what doesn’t belong and then figure out how to rearrange what does.  It is an individual journey that defines who you are in a totally new way.  You discover your truth by looking for it down deep within and then integrating it into your life.  You are on a life adventure.  This journey is for you alone.  Embrace it and life it fully.

The spiritual journey is individual, highly personal. It can’t be organized or regulated.  It isn’t true that everyone should follow one path.  Listen to your own truth – Ram Dass

There are some that will say that living your life purpose, is being selfish.  That you are ignoring the wishes of others.  But actually, the reverse is true.

Each one of us was given as part of our life journey a divine destiny.  You were born into the place and the family that would give you the tools to accomplish this purpose.  Some of those life lessons come through adversity, some come as part of the journey of rediscovering who you are really meant to be.

If you don’t take the risks, make the changes and transform your life, then your destiny will not be fulfilled.  And you will not be living the life that God sent you here to live.

So, it is actually selfish to not live up to your full potential.  To not find out who you are supposed to be.  To not utilize your power to its full capability. To not live out loud and up front your God given destiny.

Don’t Worry, Be Happy

“Happiness is not something readymade.  It comes from your own actions” – Dalai Lama

As an adult you might look at all the clean laundry on this bed and sigh, thinking that it all needed to be folded or hung up and put away.

But my two grandsons didn’t see a pile of work to do, they saw fun.  The smiles on their faces make my heart burst with joy.  Can you remember being this age and thinking that everything in and around your house was just waiting for you to figure out a way to have fun with it?

As an adult you need to get back that lens of seeing things as something ready made to make you happy.

“Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do, are in harmony” – Mahatma Gandhi

One of the things that I love about watching small children, is their ability to just be themselves.  They aren’t hiding who they are behind a mask, no fake smiles, no hidden agendas.  If something does happen that makes them sad or mad, their emotions flow straight through them.  The don’t pout in the corner waiting for someone to coax them back into a good mood.  They have their moments when a tantrum hits them, then they immediately get distracted and two minutes later they are on the bed rolling in clean clothes and laughing about nothing.

They don’t have baggage that they carry around with them, that slows down their emotions.  They don’t find themselves trapped in an endless loop of replaying a bad experience over and over again.  They don’t let their emotions send them into an endless spiral of judgment and negativity.  They don’t spend their days getting triggered by something unimportant. They don’t let a single thing cause them to spend the rest of the day in a bad mood.

“The best thing that you can do to this world is to be joyous.  Being joyful, is the greatest offering you can make to the world”  – Jaggi Vasadev

Have you ever been in a terrific mood, driving down the freeway as you go to work?  Then someone cuts you off.  You might mutter under your breath.  Or maybe you yell at the driver shaking you head or hands.  Or maybe you drive right up on their bumper to let them know how angry you are.

A few weeks ago, two drivers were going down the freeway, and I don’t know what started the argument, but they were taking turns cutting each other off, then they pulled their cars over and one man got out with a baseball bat.  Fortunately, there was a highway patrol behind them, and he was able to stop it from escalating even further.

Why do people let someone else’s actions destroy their own good mood?  Why do they feel the need to somehow get back at them for their either unthinking or aggressive driving habits?

“Respect yourself enough to walk away from anything that no longer serves you, grows you, or makes you happy”  – Unknown

It isn’t easy to let things go as fast as they happen to you.  But if you remember these two rascals and a load of clothes just out of the dryer, maybe, just maybe, you can be like a child.  Feel the emotion, and let it flow out of you.  Take back your self respect and don’t allow anyone to push you down the rabbit hole of negative emotions.  Just walk away.  Dance down the sidewalk.  Laugh.

Just because someone invites you to argue and fight,

doesn’t mean you have to accept the invitation.

Self-Awareness allows you the space to check in within you and choose happiness.  To choose not to worry.  To choose the “easy button” in all aspects of living your life in joy and happiness.

When you choose to live your life from the place of gratitude it helps you to shift your energy, to bring in more of what you want in your life.  As you walk down your chosen path, the journey of life brings you many things.  Not all of them are meant to stay.  Everything in your life currently is serving some sort of purpose.  Part of the journey is figuring out why it is in your life.

What it is supposed to be teaching you, and once you know and implement that knowledge, then it is time to let it go.  What an interesting thing it is to recognize that in every moment you have choices laid before you.  You can choose anger and frustration, or you can let the negative emotion roll in a wave over you and past you to the shore.  Watch as it draws all of the negativity back out to sea.

“We either make ourselves miserable or we make ourselves strong.  The amount of work is the same” – Carol Castenada

Sometimes happiness is a feeling. Sometimes it’s a decision.  Don’t let stupid things break your happiness.  If you really look at life, while you will have tragedy happen in your life, most of your unhappiness from day to day is your being triggered by something stupid.

• What are your dreams, visions, your life purpose?
• Are you on track to bring them into reality and complete them?
• Have you allowed distractions to sidetrack you?
• Are you unclear on what your life purpose is or how to bring it into reality?

Remember, we here at LemonadeMakers are here for you.  Contact us and let us help you choose a million reasons to be happy.

Celebrate The Hero In Each Of Us, That Voice That Is Brave Enough To Say “Enough” And “No More”

“Strength doesn’t come from what you can do.  It comes from overcoming the things you once thought you couldn’t” – Rikki Rogers

Life in a Jar . . .  a play written by school children in Kansas.  Tells the story of Irena Sendlerowa who saved around 2,500 Jewish babies from Nazi death camps.  Saying that what she did was nothing special, she said “I was brought up to believe that a person must be rescued when drowning, regardless of religion and nationality.  The term hero irritates me greatly.  The opposite is true.  I continue to have pangs of conscience that I did so little.”

She was captured by the Gestapo and beaten, breaking and crushing her legs and feet, and then driven away to be executed.  On the way, she was rescued.  She was never able to walk without crutches afterwards.

I think that most of us wonder if we would have had the strength and courage to do what Irena did.  Risk our lives for children that we didn’t know.  To survive that kind of beating.  To have the attitude of thinking that we could have done more than rescue 2,500 children.  She is a special kind of hero.

As brave as Irena was, think for a moment of being the mother who had to decide if she could give up her child.

What guarantee was there that this would in fact save her child?  Where did such inner strength come from?  Most of the parents who gave up their children did not survive the war and lost their lives in the death camps.

Put yourself in that place for just a moment, could you have given your child to Irena?  Their story is told in the PBS program, “Irena Sandler:  In the Name of Their Mothers”.

Harriet Tubman is another amazing woman.  Born a slave, she ran away leaving her husband and children to escape slavery.  Walking almost 90 miles to Philadelphia with no map, directions or help.  She returned to the South at least 19 times and lead her family and hundreds of other slaves to freedom via the Underground Railroad.  She was very intuitive and had dreams that would tell her when to leave the road, or that a particular way was not safe.

A movie about her life was made, called “A Woman Called Moses“.  She is an inspiration again, for standing up for what is right with bravery and courageous action.  After rescuing her family, the fact that she went back again and again, with a large bounty on her head for over 10 years makes her a monument to courage and determination.  She was also involved in helping women get the vote, working with Susan B Anthony.

“Believe in yourself and all that you are.  Know that there is something inside you that is greater than any obstacle” – Christian D. Larson

You could write story after story about amazing people who showed tremendous resilience and courage.  Who dug down deep within themselves to find their inner strength to live through trials and tribulations.  Who fought through the inner and outer darkness of their lives.

In fact, all of us have such stories within our own lives.  You may think that what you have done in your life doesn’t compare to the stories you have heard, the ones that you have labeled as heroes.  I am sure that if you were to talk with Malala Yousufzai, she would insist that what she did standing up in defiance to those who wanted to prevent her being educated, was nothing notable.  We are all Irena’s, and Harriet’s, and Malala’s.

Maya Angelou is another courageous woman, my hero.  Her writing and her wisdom are so inspiring.  One of my favorite quotes of hers, “I can be changed by what happens to me.  But I refuse to be reduced by it”.  We all face in our lives numerous times that test us.  Things can happen that can shatter you, that can pierce your soul.  But nothing that happens can reduce you to something less that you are.

“A strong woman knows she has strength enough for the journey, but a woman of strength knows it is in the journey where she will become strong” – Unknown

Like the water in a lake.  Something can cause large ripples that disturb your peace, that shatters your emotions.  The cause of the disturbance, like a large rock, might sink to the bottom of your lake, your soul.  It might forever change you, but it does not reduce you.

You still have the power to return to your inner and outer peace.  To continue to learn, grow, and transform your life.  To be curious as to what else is possible in your life.  To be an intelligent, courageous, loving woman who teaches others by being her best possible self.

Journal prompts:

• What are your dreams, visions, your life purpose?
• Are you on track to bring them into reality and complete them?
• Have you allowed distractions to sidetrack you?
• Are you unclear on what your life purpose is or how to bring it into reality?

 

Have Faith That Everything Will Work Out For The Best

There is an inner beauty about a girl who believes in herself, who knows she is capable of anything that she puts her mind to.  There is a beauty in the strength and determination of a girl who follows her own path, who isn’t thrown off by obstacles along the way.  There is an inner beauty about a girl whose confidence comes from experiences, who knows she can fall, pick herself up and move on – Unknown

I love the last line.  When we step outside of our comfort zone, when we take a leap of faith, there are times we fall down.  It is part of the process.  When a baby starts crawling, then climbing up and walking along the furniture, they display the perfect attitude.  They take a step or two, with wobbly legs and almost no balance.  They fall on their butts.  They may cry.  But the next thing you know they are back to trying to take another step. 

We tell them “come to moma” and they get the biggest grins on their faces, so excited.  They take a wobbly step after wobbly step into the moms arms.  This is what walking outside the comfort zone is about.  Taking a first step and another, wobbling along the way.  Crashing and burning and getting back up until we can walk with perfect balance and ease.

She was unstoppable. not because she did not have failures or doubts, but because she continued on despite them  – Unknown

No matter how many defeats we encounter, we can recover.  We are resilient and we don’t “cry uncle”, we figure out another way around the obstacle and continue on.  Along our life journey we can expect that there will be times when we become lost to our purpose and passion in life.  We may encounter some sort of addiction problem; we may go through the loss of a spouse or child that sends us off the deep end; we may have severe health issues that make us wonder if we want to continue living; we may encounter mental health issues.  What we need to understand is that there isn’t any mistake or issue in our life that we can’t rise up out of.

Strong Woman – you may encounter many defeats, but you must not be defeated.  In fact, it may be necessary to encounter the defeats, so you can know who you are, what you can rise from, how you can still come out of it  – Maya Angelou

Recovery from anything goes through a process.  Good days, bad days.  You will sometimes feel all alone and maybe even abandoned by others.  The flip side of that feeling is that you are now empowered to help others who are struggling.  Your friends and family may not understand what you are going through.  Instead of bottling up your struggle or judging them as insensitive, you have the opportunity to try to explain in a million different ways.  Sometimes if they haven’t walked in your shoes, it is like trying to explain the fax machine to a two year old.  You can explain how it works a million different ways, but they won’t understand.  So that has to be ok.  Sometimes we just have to accept, “it is what it is” and move onward.

Whenever we begin to feel as if we can no longer go on, hope whispers in our ear to remind us that we are strong – Robert M Hensel

Your problems won’t magically go away, but as you recover they will become more and more manageable.  The days of overwhelm will get fewer.  As you go through the process of recovery, you will change in many small and large ways.  It is hard to see the changes yourself.  It is like when you have a 12 month old who is learning how to walk, run, and talk.  They are growing like crazy, but we don’t really notice until nothing they have fits.  But if you were to go on a trip for two weeks and come back to that toddler, you would immediately see all of the changes in growth and things that they are doing.  Others notice the changes faster than we do, because they have the space away from us.

Working hard for something we don’t care about is called stress.  Working hard for something we love is called passion – Unknown

The important thing to remember when we are going through any kind of recovery, is the end result that we are working towards.  What we are fighting for.  Working out everyday at the gym results in our becoming happier, healthier, stronger, as step by step we are recovering.  There may be times in the fight where we miss guarding ourselves and get punched.  We may fall to the ground, breathing heavy, wondering if we can get back up.  What we have to remember is that as long as we get back up, keep fighting for our wholeness, we have not lost.

Sometimes when you’re in a dark place, you think you’ve been buried, but you’ve actually been planted.  – Unknown

Take the time to breathe.  It seems simple, but have you ever we taken a yoga class and been reminded that you are holding your breath and you need to breathe?  Or maybe doing something on a machine in the gym and the instructor is reminding you to breathe?  There are times were we seem to hold our breath, because something is somewhat painful.  There are times when are so excited or angry that we forget to breathe.  The proverb of taking 10 deep breaths before speaking or acting comes into play here.  When we take really deep full belly breaths it somehow seems to disconnect us from our runaway emotions and allows our brain to reconnect and begin to direct our thoughts. 

We either make ourselves miserable or we make ourselves strong. The amount of work is the same  – Carlos Castenada

If we take those 10 deep full belly breaths right now, you will see what I mean.  It will allow you to see some patterns, some logical reasoning comes back into your space and you can see how although the recovery was painful, it does have some wonderful jewels buried right alongside of you.  There are some positive things that you have learned about yourself on this journey.  Today is the best day to celebrate with gratitude those gifts.  Believe in yourself again.  Love those around you and most importantly love yourself.  Live, Laugh, Love and celebrate life again.

Say YES To New Adventures

It all begins and ends in your mind.  What you give power to, has power over you, if you allow it.

  – Unknown

So how do you work with your mind to change your story?  You acknowledge that you are where you are in your story because of how you did, or did not use your power.  You realize that while you can’t control every challenge that happens in your life, you can control your response to it.  That is where your power to control your story originates – how you respond.

Allowing people inside your life is a beautiful thing.  Letting go of people who drain your spirit is another beautiful thing you can do for your life.  The key to being happy is knowing you have the power to choose what to accept and what to let go.

  – Dodinsky

First step is to silence the mind.  The subconscious mind is so busy trying to distract us from our real story.  It wants us to get lost in the stories of who our parents said we were.  Of who our friends and relatives expect us to be.  But our true story is waiting in our hearts to be re-discovered.  To be released from the cage that we put it in when we were small children. 

Meditation is a great way to learn to silence the mind.  Visualization is another great way to give the mind something structured to do, so that it will let our heart and soul communicate with us.  For me, my heart and soul communicates best in my dreams.  Many of my poems and best blog posts come from ideas in my dreams.

The soul usually knows what to do to heal itself.  The challenge is to silence the mind.

  – Unknown

Second step is to let go of trying to control things that you have no control over.  To let go of what you can’t change.  Which usually means that we are trying to control the behavior of someone else.  Or control things over which we have no power in the first place. 

In our life story we sometimes have to climb a high mountain pass.  We are supposed to travel up over the pass and back down the other side.  As we follow our road over the mountain, we may find the road has been washed out.  We might find the road has had a rock or mud slide.  Maybe a bridge is out, or there is a raging forest fire.  We might have to detour around whatever the roadblock is.  That doesn’t mean that we drag all of those rocks, mud, broken bridges or burning bushes with us, as we go down the other side of the mountain.  We leave that roadblock on the road.  It is not our business to fix the road.  It is not our burden to control the journey and demand that the road be repaired before we continue across the mountain.  Our business is to simply travel to our destination by any means possible.  It is in the traveling that we learn, change, adapt and transform.

One of the happiest moments in life is when you find the courage to let go of what you can’t change.

  – Unknown

Third step is to really, truly, believe from the bottom of your soul, that you are unique, no one in the entire universe is like you, and that is how it is supposed to be.  Stop trying to fit in a mold.  Stop trying to be Martha Stewart in the home, and Oprah at work, and Marilyn Monroe in the bedroom, all rolled up into one amazing super woman.  Don’t try to make yourself live out someone else’s story.  Live your own.  

You weren’t made to replicate, obey or stand in the shadow of another person.  You were made to stand in your own power and find the truth in your soul..

  – Lonerwolf

Fourth Step is to realize that while we all need a helping hand once in a while, nothing will destroy our power to live our own story faster than having the habit of depending on others.  Just like a tree that grows in the forest, we must grow deep roots to support our upward growth.  If we start leaning on the trees that we are planted by, when the storm comes into our life our roots will not support us and we will crash to the ground.  The unfortunate thing about our crash is how we damage those next to us as we fall.  We must learn to stand up alone and be an original.

Nothing else so destroys the power to stand alone as the habit of leaning upon others.  If you lean, you will never be strong or original.  Stand alone or bury your ambition to be somebody in the world.

  – Orison Swett Marden

Fifth Step has to do with your relationship with yourself.  Really understanding what real self love and self trust is all about.  Not having these vital areas in balance in your life is what leads to most of our broken, damaged relationships – with friends, with family, with our spouse, with our co-workers at our job,  It enters into how people treat us, how we communicate our needs, wants and desires, and how we are perceived in the world.

The relationship with yourself sets the tone for every other relationship you have.

  – Jane Travis

Sixth Step is your relationship to others and the world.  You can’t make everyone happy and it isn’t your job to do so.  There are always going to be people who say that you are “not enough” – not good enough, not pretty enough, not rich enough . . .  and so on.  Those judgments are on them.  They want to feel better by having their own problems being pushed off on to you.  It is not your job to judge them back.  To think that you have to show others what kind of “bad” people they are.  Their true colors will come out without your help or assistance.  Don’t blame others for your life, and don’t accept the blame for how they are living their own life.

Give.  But don’t allow yourself to be used. 

Love.  But don’t allow your heart to be abused. 

Trust.  but don’t be naïve. 

Listen.  But don’t lose your own voice.

  – thisislovelifequotes. net

There are more steps, breadcrumbs that you find along your journey.  It all begins with a simple decision.  Is this DAY ONE, or is this ONE DAY?  You decide.  What’s your story?

Discover Your True Story

You tell me to quiet down cause my opinions make me less beautiful.  But I was not made with a fire in my belly so I could be put out.  I was not made with a lightness in my tongue so I could be easy to swallow.  I was made heavy – half blade and half silk.  Difficult to forget but not easy for the mind to follow – Rupi Kaur

Life gives us a lot of experiences.  They run the whole emotional scale.  You fall from ecstatic joy to pain that leaves you whimpering in the corner, wishing that death would come and take you away from it.  Life gives you the experience of Heaven, Hell and every realm between.  Like clay you are formed and molded by your life experiences.  Like clay you go through the fire.

But you have a choice about what that fire does to you.  You can choose to become rigid, brittle and defined by those fires, so that everyone you meet hears about your horrific life.  Or you can choose to become refined by the fire, tempered by it and made stronger.

Why would you fear the fire?  Because when you are refined by the fire, it exposes you.  You become vulnerable. You have to own the good, the bad, and the ugly and beautiful parts of who you are.  To be ok to be perfectly, imperfect.

People will see the ugly parts of you, and you have to acknowledge that that is part of who you are.  You can’t deny it, you can’t make it be less than it is, you can’t say it doesn’t exist, and that somehow that ugly bit of you is actually someone else’s fault.  You can’t say I lost my temper, and it was that person’s fault.  That they deserved your going nuclear on them.

The fire shines the light on you.  If you stand up in that light and acknowledge who you are, then you have the opportunity to transform it.  You can release the negativity, shift it, and change it into something better.

She wasn’t looking for a knight, she was looking for a sword – Atticus

You might have this mix of fairy tale dreams where you want someone to take care of you, and yet at the same time you fiercely do not want someone to fix you.  You are not looking to be fixed.  You are not broken, or damaged, or needing to be rescued.

That is judging your experience without knowing the whole story.  That is making assumptions of what your dreams are made up of.  That is not understanding what your destiny is preparing you for.

You don’t need a hero, you are one.  What you need is a sword to cut out of us all of the parts that do not serve you, and do not belong as part of you.

Promise yourself that you can and will do better.  Hold yourself to not looking back.  Learn from the past but don’t live there.  Leave the baggage at the airport and travel lightly through life.  Anything that shattered you wasn’t meant for you.

You have this habit sometimes of holding on to something that doesn’t serve you.  You stay in the job, where you’re experiencing bullying, where you’re put down because you believe in some way it is true.  You stay in the job where you are experiencing harassment because you tell yourself you need “this” job.  You stay in a relationship that burns your soul, sacrificing yourself because they say they love you even when their actions tell you it is a lie.

Don’t continue to dance on the broken glass, thinking that you can somehow fix it.  It will just slice your soul and shred your spirit.

You can’t let other people tell you who you are.  You have to decide that for yourself – Unknown

At some point you have to change the situation.  Instead of being battered by the storm, you have to become the storm.  In order to thrive you have to become fearless in the pursuit of what sets your soul on fire.  You have to put on your life jacket and abandon the sinking ship, with the knowledge that you will be okay.

It might not be today or tomorrow, but the storm will always play itself out.  The sun will shine again.  You are valuable, you are a Goddess, and you must firmly believe that with all of your heart and soul.

She was powerful, not because she wasn’t scared but because she went on so strongly, despite the fear – Atticus

This kind of power comes from the place of not needing anyone to validate who you are.  To get to that space, you have to have gone through the refining fires.  You have to have exposed your vulnerable places, your ugly thoughts and actions.  You have brought the light to all of the dark corners of your heart.  When you have faced who you really are without the masks, without the excuses and justifications, fear gets burnt out of you.

Fear is a choice, and you can choose not to live at its address any longer.

When we accept who you are, you lose false pride.  When you own “this is who I am” fear loses its grip on you.  You are ready.  You are willing.  It is time to go out and fight for your dreams.  You no longer feel that you are obligated to prove your worth to anyone, and if they are demanding that you do so, you walk away.

Once upon a time you were a little girl with big dreams that you promised you’d make real one day.  Don’t disappoint yourself – Unknown

Your Saving Grace Is To Be Your Own Hero

Can you imagine this conversation between two people looking out over the water and seeing a hand reach up out of the water?

Can’t you see she is drowning?

She’s just doing that for attention.

Someone should help her.

If we acknowledge her, then she’ll never stop.

I think she is in danger.

She’s just feeling sorry for herself.

It’s too late now.  She is gone.

Why didn’t she ask for help?

This conversation plays out in all of our lives at some time.  For me it was my daughter was close to two years old,.  She wasn’t talking.  Literally no words.  She had sounds, so she wasn’t mute.  She just didn’t say mama or dada or anything.  I had taken her to doctors and they determined that physically there was nothing wrong.  She could hear fine.  She understood what you were saying, she just couldn’t communicate back.  So they said I should force her to talk. That she wasn’t talking because I gave her want she was trying to ask for.  They said, “When she was indicating that she wanted something, don’t give it to her unless she says the word”.  So we had a painful few months of following the doctors directions.  Then I took her back and demanded to see some specialist.  This issue was not that she didn’t want to say the words, the issue was that something wasn’t connecting correctly.

So we saw the specialist, and they couldn’t figure out anything that was wrong.  So they told us to put her in daycare.  They felt she wasn’t around enough children.  Even though she had an older brother, cousins and friends her age from church – that wasn’t sufficient.  So we put her in daycare,  Another bad decision as it made her stand out.  When they were sharing in circle time and she couldn’t verbalize her sounds into real words, she became even more withdrawn.  So again, back to the doctors.  Finally they authorized speech therapy.,  The area we lived in had a school she attended for four hours a day.  They had a two to one ratio of speech therapist teachers who worked with her and the other children, who all had some sort of speech disability.  Within 6 months she had a 100 word vocabulary and she was finally able to express herself.  It took me one whole year to get her the help she needed.

I felt like I was having that conversation with those doctors, that I typed above  I knew she had a problem and they were not listening or helping.  They were just making things worse.  Fortunately I kept after them until she got the help she needed.  She had delayed speech, and it was an inherited condition.  I discovered later that one of my grandfathers daughters from his first marriage had the same thing happen with one of her grandchildren.  And my daughter had the same thing happen with a couple of her own children.  It was not that she was doing it for attention.  It was not that trying to help her get what she wanted but couldn’t tell us, was just encouraging bad behavior.  She was asking for help.

Ships don’t sink because of the water around them; ships sink because of the water that gets in them.  Don’t let what’s happening around you get inside you and weigh you down.

  – Unknown

Have you ever been the person asking for help?  Did it feel like people were watching and talking, but no one could hear you through the water?  This happened to me when I was 28 years old.  I had been diagnosed with Glaucoma.  They didn’t want to do surgery because I was so young.  A lot of times when you are young and healthy, when they do laser surgery on your eyes, your eyes think that the surgery is a problem and “repair” the surgery back to what it thinks is the normal way for the eye to be.  So we were trying out three different drugs.  The first on didn’t work at all.  The second one had a side effect of making me suicidal.  I could tell it was making me depressed and giving me dark thoughts.  I was struggling with it, but it was making me afraid to talk about it.  I finally was able to tell the doctor what was happening and he put me on the third drug.  Due to different side effects I ended up doing the surgery.

I was talking to my husband about the second drug and asking him if he couldn’t see what was happening.  He said, that he could see it, but was so afraid of putting me over the edge I was balanced on that he did nothing.  We talked about it for some time.  I explained, that what that did was to make me feel like he didn’t care.  That even if what he said or did was not the perfect thing, at least I would have known that he was trying, that he cared.  Instead I felt abandoned and that he didn’t care about me.  Like the woman in the story, I felt like I was reaching for help and he was just watching me drown.

We all have bad days.  We all witness others having bad days.  Sometimes those bad days turns into weeks and months and years.  We are crying out for help.  We feel abandoned.  We all watch it happening to someone we know or love, and we don’t know what to do.  So we do nothing, or we get bad advice from experts and do the wrong thing.  What we need to do is go to divine source.  The divine source speaks to us in our hearts.  When we reach out to others from that space, even if what we do is not the perfect thing to do, they see that we are trying from a space of love and compassion. Not from a space of judgment, or making someone be wrong. 

To have faith is to trust yourself to the water.  When you swim you don’t grab hold of the water, because if you do, you will sink and drown.  Instead you relax, and float.

  – Alan Watts

We need to realize when we are drowning and ask for help.  We need seek deep within to find what it is that is currently trying to be exposed and released from our life.  A wrong belief that is holding us hostage.  A drug or alcohol addiction.  A relationship that is killing us, but we won’t let go of.  That we are trying to save someone, who is just taking us down with them.  When we try to save broken people, we need to take care that we don’t cut ourselves on their broken pieces.  So many patterns, addictions, issues of self sabotage.  They need to be released so that we can again relax and float.  Life sometimes takes us to the edge, but it is always within our control, it is our choice to be a victim, or we can decide that this life can and will be better and we are a thriver. 

Life sometimes takes you into troubled waters not to drown you but to cleanse you.

  – Unknown

 So when we find ourselves in deep water.  Relax and float.  Reach out for help, but always remember it really comes down to being our own hero.  No one else can fix us, and we can fix anyone else.  It is always an inside job. 

 

 

In Order To Change The World, You Must Be The Change

“Only I can change my life.  No one can do it for me”  –  Carol Burnett

This photo so clearly explains why other people don’t get the transformations that you are being called to make in your life.  There are two different levels of perception here.  And each person can only see their own level of perception.  Both are true.  I can explain what I see with twenty thousand words, and if your level of perception is contained in the world she is pulling away, dark depressing and dreary, you will never see the sunshine that I do.

 “Sometimes if you want to see a change for the better, you have to take things into your own hands”  – Clint Eastwood

The better you know yourself the better you can embrace change.  Self knowledge is vital, because your subconscious minds run these programs behind the scenes.  Your subconscious like things exactly the way they are.  It will try to keep you in your comfort zone.  You need to let go of the old programs.

Most of the fears that you have, are fears of the unknown.  Those fears feature negative programing.  This programming will keep you stuck in the shadows, in the dark.  It will keep you from perceiving what else is possible.  I know that for myself when I have a medical issue, waiting for test results is the worst.  My mind goes crazy thinking of all of the possible worst case scenarios.  I am definitely in a dark place with wild imagining of brain tumors, cancer, a failing organ, and so on.

“The secret of change is to focus all of your energy, not on fighting the old, but on building the new”  – Socrates

But once I have a diagnosis, it all changes.  Now I am researching and figuring out how to cure the issue and become healthy again.  Now I have something tangible to work towards.  The unknown has been removed and that fear is dissolved.  I am free again to begin making positive changes for my health and my life.

“May your choices reflect your hopes, not your fears” – Nelson Mandela

That doesn’t mean that fear doesn’t show up again.  It does.  But if you are being honest with yourself, you can identify the unknown piece that is creating the fear and remove it with new knowledge.

“If we don’t change, we don’t grow.  If we don’t grow, we aren’t really living”  – Gail Sheehy

How do you know when fear of the unknown is showing up in your life?

• It shows up whenever you find yourself avoiding something that needs to be done
• It shows up when you find that your progress towards a dream is slowing down
• It shows up when you begin to lose passion and fire towards the dream.
• It shows up when you begin to feel like you are wading through the mud instead of flowing down the stream.

Whenever these feelings start to exist, it is time to get quiet in your mind.  To sit quietly and ask your inner knower

• “What am I not seeing?”
• “What is it that is slowing me down or sidetracking me?”
• “What research can I do to bring light to this area?”

“I am on the hunt for who I’ve not yet become”  – Unknown

Once you identify the fear, then sit with it a while longer.  See what lies beneath that fear.  I can guarantee that there is always another layer.  Fears tend to travel in packs like wild dogs.  Each dog having its own fear.  Once you think you have given each dog a name, now you can make the dog stop its barking by addressing its own particular fear.

You will know if you are successful because you will feel the energy and passion return to your dream.  All of a sudden you will feel flow happening and that progress is being made.  It is like a hose that has a kink in it.  At first it feels like you are not getting any water pressure.  But once you find the kink and straighten it out, the water comes rushing out at full force.

“Change can be beautiful when we are brave enough to evolve with it, and change can be brutal when we fearfully resist”  – Bryant McGill

The key is to pay attention to what is happening in your life.  It is so easy to get lost and sidetracked.  It is so easy for the fears so sneak up on you and gain control.  It is also easy to stop and listen to your heart and soul for guidance.

“It doesn’t matter how slowly you go, as long as you do not stop”  – Unknown

It takes practice to check in with yourself on a regular basis.  Meditation and journaling are two practices that will help you to keep track of where you are, and wake you up if you start to fall asleep.

I know how much my writing helps me to catch myself when I start to get sidetracked.  It brings my energy back up into the higher vibrations.  These higher vibrations are a vital part of bringing your dreams into reality.  Remind yourself of what you have already transformed in your past.  Take courage that you can transform whatever is currently in front of you now.  Truly, the better you know yourself, the better you can embrace what is now changing in your life.

What are your dreams, visions, your life purpose? Are you on track to bring them into reality and complete them? Have you allowed distractions to side track you? Are you unclear on what your life purpose is or how to bring it into reality?

If not, contact LemonadeMakers via messenger.  We can talk – asking and thinking about the right questions will open doors for you.

I Am What I Choose To Become

“Today I am discovering who I am.  Today I am becoming my person, worthy of developing all of me.  Today I am beginning to know that I am okay the way I am”  – Ruth Fishel

Discovering who you are requires that you go on a journey.  You can’t become who you are trying to become by remaining where you are, or what you are.  This journey begins with curiosity.  Asking the hard questions of ourselves.  Where am I going?  What am I learning from what I read, what I listen to, what I am watching on TV?  What do those I associate with have me thinking about?  Are the answers to these questions what I want my life to be about?  It isn’t chance that helps me to become what I am seeking.  It is making transformational life changes that does that.

“If we are always arriving and departing, it is also true that we are eternally anchored.  One’s destination is never a place, but rather a new way of looking at things”  – Henry Miller

When you start out on this journey of self discovery, you think that if you can just learn enough, take in enough knowledge that you will develop the wisdom to become the person you want to be.  It is the natural first step, and you may get lost in this first step.

• You are doing a lot of work, but it just doesn’t seem like you are making any progress.
• You keep departing, but it doesn’t feel like we are ever arriving.

There is this gap.  You keep stuffing it with creative ideas, and plans, and dreams – but it doesn’t seem like you are creating anything that truly bridges that gap.

I love the word GAP – because it is Gods Area of Preparation.  That is why it doesn’t seem like the bridge is ever getting completed.  The  gap will be bridged when divine timing and actions have been completed.  Don’t give up.  Keeping fighting to reach the other side of the gap.

“I love the person I’ve become, because I fought to become her”  – Kaci Diane

I remember the true story of an Olympic Athlete.  She went to a sports camp as a child and demonstrated some talent with volleyball.  The coach told her that if she worked hard, it would give her a scholarship to college.  So she worked hard and when it came time, she wrote to the colleges with a good volleyball program and asked them to come see her play.  She got her teachers to write letters about her and was successful in getting a full ride to college.

Her senior year in college she was watching the Olympic Games and decided to chase the dream of being in the Olympics.  So again, she wrote letters to come see her play and got her professors to write letters and was successful in getting into the tryouts.  She spent a week in tryouts and worked hard, and even though she felt the other players were better she made it to the team.  The team lived and worked in Southern California for 4 years to the next Olympic Games.

During that time she realized that if she was going to be on the team that played in the games, she needed to tear her game down and rebuild it.  Now think about this – she was good enough to get a full ride into college.  In college she was All American.  She tried out and was accepted on the Olympic Team.  Obviously she was talented and skilled.  But she knew that she could be more, so she fought to be more.

“I always did something I was a little not ready to do.  I think that’s how you grow.  When there’s that moment of “wow, I’m not really sure I can do this” and you push through those moments, that’s when you have a breakthrough”  – Marissa Meyer

So when we are having a bad day, week, month or year – that is something to remember.  Sometimes we need to tear ourselves back down to the foundations of who we are, and rebuild.

Take all of the lessons that we have learned in this life, all of the crazy experiences, hurts, blessings in disguise and know that none of it was a mistake.  Find positive ways to be in the world.  Make a difference, no matter how small it feels.  We can be the change we want to see in our world.

• Be open to the challenge of change.
• Face our fears of not being enough, not knowing enough, and do the things we know need to be done, even if it terrifies us.
• Love who and what you are, and who you are becoming.
• Trust that you have within you everything that you need to do so.
• Believe in yourself.
• Wish upon the stars and then put faith in that wish coming true.

“Do not confuse the word “belief” with the word “wish”.  The two are not the same . . .  the element of faith is the only sure power by which a wish may be translated into a belief, and a belief into a reality”  – Napoleon Hill

It can be really scary, to keep going when you are in the part of change that you have to move mountains.  You see the pain, the heartache, the mistakes that you are making along the way.  You judge yourself, and cower in fear.  You wish it would all just go away and leave you lying in the middle of the floor, just a shapeless puddle of confusion and fears.

Instead,  get up.  Shake off the confusion, face the fear and walk in in the power of who you really are.  Remember that it isn’t what happens to you that defines you.  It isn’t the mistakes you made along the way that defines you.  What defines you is who you chose to become in spite of all of it.  At the end of the journey, the only one who is responsible for who you become is you.  You are a work in progress.  Each day is a new day.  A new pattern of thoughts.  A new wave of emotions, A new belief that you can become whatever you wish to become.

“You’ll learn as you get older, that rules are made to be broken.  Be bold enough to live life on your own terms, and never ever apologize for it.  Go against the grain, refuse to conform, take the road less traveled instead of the well-beaten path.  Laugh in the face of adversity, and leap before you look.  Dance as though everybody is watching.  March to the beat of your own drummer.  And stubbornly refuse to fit it”  – Mandy Hale

Curiosity Is The First Step In Awakening The Soul

“Many of us step foot on to the path to spiritual enlightenment expecting it to lead us onward and upward, hoping to become something better than we are, and ready to gather all of the important things we need along the way.  What a surprise it is when we eventually realize that this path isn’t taking us onward but inward, that we’re not gather things so much as letting them go, and that there was never anything more to aspire to than the truth of what we already are” – Cristen Rodgers

Something will occur in your life when the soul is ready to wake up.  It could be a health scare or near-death experience that you have.  It could be losing a parent, spouse or child.  Loss of identity when you lose your job.  A divorce.  Then come the signs of feeling that your life is empty, devoid of real meaning and purpose.

It is as though you are lost in the woods, and you keep trying to find a trail back to your car.  You keep wandering and you’re starting to panic.  You feel as though something is lost or missing in your life.  Like there is this giant hole that you keep walking around.  You don’t know what it means, except that you have to find something to make your life meaningful.

You start questioning everything you have been taught.  Either you have abandoned God, or you feel he has abandoned you.  There is a sense of injustice.  You feel like a blind person groping about in the darkness in a strange place.  Loved ones may be trying to help you, and you just want everyone to leave you alone.  In fact it seems to be a necessity if you are to figure this out – you must be alone.

“Fortunately, some are born with spiritual immune systems that sooner or later give rejection to the illusory worldview grafted upon them from birth through social conditioning.  They begin sensing that something is amiss, and start looking for answers.  Inner knowledge and anomalous outer experiences show them a side of reality others at oblivious to, and so begins their journey of awakening.  Each step of the journey is made by following the heart instead of following the crowd and by choosing knowledge over the veils of ignorance” – Henri Bergson

It is the being alone that allows you to go within.  Solitude is important when you start on this path to enlightenment.  You need for space for just sitting and going within.  To connect, to see what is crying out to be released as not being part of your authentic self.  To regenerate and renew the pieces of you that were killed off as part of social conditioning.  The parts you buried because you were told it wasn’t safe to be who you really are.  It takes a great deal of courage to go within and choose to be your true self.

When you start down this path, you will think you are missing something.  Think back to the Wizard of Oz and the journey down the yellow brick road.  Toto was a catalyst for Dorothy always running off when Dorothy was needing to wake up and become conscious about something.  The first thing she found on the journey was the ruby slippers.  She had no idea of the power of the slippers and they remained dormant until she was enlightened enough to correctly use them.

The Scarecrow, The Tin Man, The Cowardly Lion, they all had what they were looking for.  The journey for them, was to look inside and expand their boundaries and eliminate their limitations.  To realize their full potential.  They weren’t missing anything.  They just needed to awaken to who they already were.  To choose to be better.  To let go of doubts and stories.  You tell yourself similar stories about not being capable of doing something.  The Wizard of Oz cast of characters needed to gather enough experience, to have the confidence that they were more than enough.

As you walk down your own yellow brick road of self-discovery, you will uncover the enlightenment that you’re seeking.  You will discover who you are deep within your heart and soul.  You will grow and transform into who you are destined to become.  Your life experiences have been designed specifically, to help you learn the skills required to fulfill your destiny.

Instead of continuing to conform to others ideas of who you should be, you choose to listen to the guidance of your own soul’s voice.  To travel the unexplored path, to think outside of the box, to be curious and question everything you have been taught.  To discover the impossible journey.

Curiosity is the beginning of awakening.  It is the first step on the path to discover who you are, what your purpose is, what feeds your soul.  When you get curious you start exploring the world around you with different eyes.  You get clarity about what to release and leave behind, as you see what no longer fits who you are becoming.  You open up to new things; new truths, new understandings, new awakenings.  You create the magic of uncovering who you are.

The treasures of gifts you never acknowledged.  You let go of fear after fear.  You start honoring and valuing who you are deep down inside.  Self love and self trust grow and expand with each fear that you release.  You realize that each fear was designed to hold you captive.  You were caged by fear, so that you couldn’t discover your divine self.

“You reach a point where you feel yourself going through an awakening.  You look at what you used to do and who you used to be.  It hurts because you realize you believed in and promoted nonsense.  You grow; you evolve and you stop because you no longer operate at that frequency.  As a result, there’s certain people that you have to walk away from.  As a result, you start to realize just how messed up the world is.  You want to help; you want to heal; you want to make it a better world.  This is how you know you’re awakening a higher level of consciousness . . .  “ – Sylvester McNutt

When you start living from that authentic place deep inside of you, you will be truly seen.  In order to be who you are at the soul level, you have to let go of the stories you have been defined by your whole life.  It is like a puzzle where the pieces were jammed into place because they didn’t quite fit.  When you are living life from the authentic place at the soul level you begin, piece by piece, to rearrange all of those jammed pieces of the puzzle.

You realize who you are at your deepest level.  When that happens, all the pieces will fit together with no gaps.  That is when you will experience a whole new level of love, grace, peace and serenity in your life.

You will still have road blocks on your path.  You will still continue to grow through success and failures.  The difference is that you begin to recover faster.  The difference is that as you embrace what is true, you keep being curious about your life purpose.  You ask better questions that when you started.  The difference is measured by real progress on our life’s journey.

Never Be Defined By Your Past

Fear is like the Wizard of Oz, projecting itself onto the screen, frightening you with how powerful it is.  When in reality, it is a small man behind the curtain. Don’t be afraid to move the curtain and expose the fear. Finding the blessing in the fear, is the opportunity to open your heart and mind to the idea of change and reinvention.

“Sometimes painful things can teach us lessons that we didn’t think we needed to know” – Unknown

Lessons show up in painful situations.  Sometimes you consciously choose to change, because you have taken the time to realize something isn’t working and why. Other times you stumble upon ( notice the word stumble) an opportunity.

Sometimes you trip over something and you catch yourself before the fall, hopping across the floor as you try to regain your balance. Other times you can trip over something that face plants you on the ground, and has you digging rocks off your skin. Either way there are still choices to make.

“One of the happiest moments in life is when you find the courage to let go of what you can’t change”  – Unknown

“No matter who tries to teach you lessons about life, you won’t understand it until you go through it on your own”  – Unknown

The classic opportunities for reinvention tend to come from two things. With a heartbreak such as; losing a job, ending a relationship, the death of a close friend or family member.

The classic “good but scary” opportunities for reinvention are you go away to college, you move to a new town with a new job, you get the really big promotion such as those COO, CEO, CFO types of promotions or the best of all, you decide to be an entrepreneur and your own boss.

In today’s world, your fill in the blank might be related to the changing world from Covid-19.  It might be you are living in a war zone.  It might be that you are reaching out to help with refugees in your town.  It might be a medical problem with yourself or a family member.  It might be trying to figure out what’s next in your career or family life.

“There are things in life we don’t want to happen, but have to accept; things we don’t want to know but have to learn; and people we can’t live without, but have to let go”  – Unknown

In today’s world lots of businesses are rethinking how they do business.  They are trying to see the gaps and create opportunities to bridge them. Bringing an idea to life is hard work. You can expect it to cost you more personally, financially, and maybe even reputational than you thought it would. There are sleepless nights. You become a master of second guessing your choice to make this move.

“Disney taught me to never stop 

believing in my dreams

Harry Potter taught me that love and friendship

dominates all kind of evil

Narnia taught me that we must all grown up 

& leave our childhood behind,

but must never forget it

Percy Jackson taught me that there’s

a hero in every one of us

Glee taught me that no matter how different we are,

there’s always that one thing we have in common”  – Unknown

But to be truly committed you need to “burn the boats”.  This expression is a “point of no return”, where you have destroyed all other choices, and you are left with no options but the intention you started with.  It comes from a famous incident when a Spanish Explorer landing in Mexico ordered their ships to be burned.  They either would conquer the country or be killed, because they had no way to return home.

So take away plan b, eliminate the lifeline.  Go all out for what you are passionate about. Follow your bliss. Look at what is working and not working. What you love to do and hate to do. The key is to get immersed in what you are passionate about and hire help for the rest.

“Each day I am thankful for nights that turned into mornings, friends that turned into family, dreams that turned into reality, and likes that turned into loves”  – Unknown

• Surround yourself with people who love to learn, share and build.
• Join or create a mastermind group with people who are putting their ideas into action.
• Seek out those in your community who solve problems and ask for suggestions.
• Create that special group of people who will be your cheerleaders, helping you to remain positive and take the risks that need to be taken, instead of holding yourself back.
  

And remember the three most important words in your fear busting vocabulary: Improvise, Adapt, Overcome.

Don’t Lose Yourself In The Hatred Of Others

Stay away from people who gossip and spread rumors.  They are choosing the path of emotional bullying and negativity.

  –  Dr Steve Maraboli

This is a really profound quote. It really struck a chord in my heart because I so resonated with the underlying truth. Really sit with the words, “tell me why they were so comfortable to say what they were saying to you”. It is really a hard thing to sit with.  I think that we have all been told gossip.  Some has been quite mean and spiteful.  It can be painful even to hear, especially if is about someone we care about.  What did that person really tell you what they had heard?  

Be careful who you trust, if someone will discuss others with you, they will certainly discuss you with others.

  – Unknown

So what does it say about me, that someone might come to me with some “juicy” gossip that they are spreading about someone I know. What signals am I broadcasting that they think I want to join in and be a part of something like that? How am I telling them that I love the drama of someone else’s downfall?

It’s not your job to stop them from talking behind you, but it’s your job not to let it affect you.

  – Unknown

People for the most part will not say to you a mean or hurtful thing about someone that you really care about. People for the most part will not gossip with someone that they know won’t put up with it.

A lot of problems in the world would disappear if we talk to each other instead of about each other.

  – Unknown

There are some minor exceptions to this rule, like my father in-law. Years ago we were staying with my in-laws waiting for the closing on our home. I had went up to the kitchen to get something and he was there. He went off on a tear down of his son, about how he was a disappointment , that all of my father in-laws failures could be traced back to his children. He said mean, hurtful cruel things about his son. Finally he ran out of steam, and I just looked at him and said, “so what kind of response are you looking for here? Why are you telling me these things? I love my husband and he isn’t anything like the son that you are describing”, and walked away. He is the exception to the rule because he is so unhappy in his life, and he doesn’t want to take responsibility for how it has turned out, so he goes around trying to tear you down to his level. The only thing you can do with someone who has a toxic personality is limit the exposure to them.

Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people.

  – Unknown

Years ago I adopted the saying, “not my movie, not my drama”, for when people that I work with start down the road of tearing down someone in their life. My sister says, “not my circus, not my monkeys”. I try very hard not to join in or be around those kinds of conversations. If they won’t let the conversation be turned to something positive, then I excuse myself and walk away.

Someone who hates you normally hates you for one of three reasons.  They either see you are a threat.  They hate themselves.  Or they want to be you.

  – Unknown

What we need in our lives is more positive conversations; more love shown in both our words and out actions. More up building and less tearing down. More compassion and less drama. More celebrating of the positive accomplishments of people and less glorification of the tragedy that takes someone out.

I’m not going to tear you down . . .  if you’re bad-mouthing me, you’re already down.

  – Dr. Steve Maraboli

This even plays out in the feedback we provide around customer service. How fast are we to complain to someone in charge when we are not treated the way we want, but do we have the same rate of speed to ask for someone in charge to praise a persons excellent customer service in taking care of you?

Talking badly about someone else while they aren’t there to defend themselves says more about you than the person you’re talking about.

  – Unknown

This quote takes it a little deeper for me that just avoiding the “drama queens”. It says that the quality of the conversations that I am part of is due in some part (large or small) to what I am attracting – knowingly or unknowingly. Gives me a slice of a shadow that I didn’t realize might still be there to work on rooting out.

I know this will seem a bit crazy, but if you want to know something about me, the best person to ask, is me.

  – Unknown

When I was in high school, I was invited to a slumber party.  I didn’t know the girl well.  I was new to the school, and desperate to fit in.  There was another new girl at school that was also invited.  I am really embarrassed about what happened next.  The girls had a game where as each person would fall asleep they would start gossiping about that person.  I joined in, even though I didn’t really know any of them.  I can remember saying stuff about the other new girl, Denise.  Then feeling guilty I pretended to fall asleep so that I didn’t feel like I had to participate.  Of course, you know what happened next.  They started in our me.  As soon as I could leave without anyone noticing I did.  I walked several miles home, at 3 AM crying the entire way.  I felt horrible for what I did and how they made me feel when they started in on me.  The next day I called Denise and apologized for what I had said.  Denise and I ended up becoming best friends.  It was a life changing moment for me.  I never wanted to feel like that again, and I certainly never wanted to hurt someone like that again.

Let them judge you.  Let them misunderstand you.  Their opinions aren’t your problems.  You stay kind, committed to love and free in your authenticity.  No matter what they do or say, don’t you doubt your worth or the beauty of your truth.  Just keep shining like you always do.

  – Unknown

So remember your life purpose.  Tell your story, your voice matters, yes it is important.  You were born to make an impact.  Pursue your dreams.  Negative people need drama like oxygen.  Stay positive.  It will take their breath away.  Remember what the grandmothers used to say, “Birds peck at the best fruit”.

Some stories don’t have a clear beginning, middle and end.  Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what’s going to happen next.  Delicious ambiguity . . .

  – Gilda Radner

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